Dunstan Ayodele Stober's Blog, page 6

First Impression Does Not Matter

You are either solving problems or creating them

“… But I have heard it said of you that when you hear a dream, you can interpret it.” — Gen 41:15

Photo by cottonbro from  Pexels

What if I told you your idea about first impressions is all wrong?

News that Amazon approved the paperback of my book, Joy Has Come Home, got me reflecting on one of the lessons I outlined in the book and reminiscing about the launch event. The master of ceremony asked me –

“What is the first impression you want people to have of you?”

I jumped right to a point in my career where I applied the lesson. Here is the backstory the audience did not get to hear that day.

My parents experienced a lot more downs than ups during my high school years. Those downs sometimes meant one meal a day. At other times, I would have to soak my old shoes for them to fit for a few hours. I did handy work at construction sites to help save up for college.

But my college years were different for one thing — I was big enough to fit into dad’s clothes and shoes. The problem? Dad would never find them when he needed them.

His trousers and shirts will go “missing.” His shoes will be left unpolished, in a place other than where he left them. He squeezed the toothpaste from bottom to top, I do from the middle. I was always in trouble for not replacing things in their proper place. I was notorious to the point dad started calling me Mr Careless.

That is when the enforcer, mum, had had enough. A few selective hand movements to my body helped imprint her words in my memory. From then on, that lesson shaped how I do things — from how I squeeze my toothpaste to how I work and do business.

She said, “people will remember you for the problems you solve or the ones you create.”

You can’t let your dad keep shouting about the same mess all the time. It is not about the shouting, but the reputation you are building. Your reputation will define you, and Mr Careless is not a name you want to stick. In years to come, you must be mindful of how you want people to remember you. Do you want people to be happy hearing your name or celebrate seeing your back? Then she gave me the example of how Joseph’s reputation as a dream interpreter got him from prison to prominence.

You see, a good first impression is useless if it does not last. A lasting experience builds your reputation, and your reputation will open doors of opportunity for you.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from  Pexels

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”  — Maya Angelou

In our world of pervasive social media, we have become more obsessed with looking good at first appearance than the quality of our connections. We organise our LinkedIn profile to attract the desired job or business opportunities. Businesses invest in aesthetically pleasing websites to create a positive perception with their target audience. Life will be more meaningful if we focus less on how we look and more on how we make people feel.

I suggest practising these six disciplines to help you go from making a good first impression to creating a lasting legacy.

1) Be clear about what legacy you want to create

2) Discover your purpose — your Why

3) Strive to be of service and not just to be a success

4) Follow your passion, not profit

5) Be a life-long learner

6) Always give your best

Order your paperback copy of my book from the link below for more about this lesson and five more.

Joy Has Come Home: Six Life Lessons That Will Help You Succeed in Business and Life

Book recommendations

Photo by RF._.studio from Pexels

Here are two book recommendations on serving others and making a difference:

a) The Power of Serving Others: You Can Start Where You Are by Gary Morsch and Dean Nelson

b) Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl

Citations

Photo by Polina Kovaleva from Pexels

Here are three quotes to encourage to you find your Why, make a difference and leave a legacy.

“The more one forgets himself — by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love — the more human he is.” —  Viktor Frankl

“What you leave behind is not what is engraved in stone monuments, but what is woven into the lives of others.” —  Pericles

“If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead, either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.” —  Benjamin Franklin

No One is Coming to Save Us

Bland, bleak or bullish, the future is in our hands

“For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future” — Jer 29:11

Photo by Marissa&Eric on Unsplash

“We are in a world of hurt” — Dr Francis Collins, Director of USA National Institute of Health on where we are with COVID-19.

“Code Red for Humanity.” That is how the UN Secretary-General, António Guterres, described the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change’s (IPCC) report on the planet’s future.

Nature is on the rampage. News agencies are reeling out a long roll of destructions wrought by the ravaging trilogy of natural disasters — heatwaves, floods and drought. There are wild bush fires in Greece, devastating floods in Venice, and heatwaves in Spain. But we are not only contending with the whims of nature.

We are witnessing unprecedented levels of man’s inhumanity to man. There is untold human suffering and carnage dispensed in raging wars from Afghanistan to Mozambique and Ethiopia.

The tapestry of the future is a bleak image. There is hardly anything in the news to indicate a chance of a better posterity.

Photo by Randy Fath on Unsplash

But two men created a moment of magic that lit up TV screens worldwide.

The sport of high jump, and indeed the Olympic movement, witnessed an extraordinary moment in history, eclipsing the Fosbury flop in 1968. Dick Fosbury introduced a jumping style that one coach said: “could wipe out an entire generation of high jumpers because they will all have broken necks.” Fosbury set an Olympic record to win gold at the 1968 Mexico games by going over the bar headfirst and landing on his back.

Roll forward 54 years. Mutaz Essa Barshim of Qatar and Gianmarco Tamberi of Italy used the popularised Fosbury flop to make history at the Tokyo 2021 Olympics. Barshim led the two men into creating a moment last seen 113 years ago.

Without an outright winner after regulations attempts, the official informed the athletes that they would have to decide the winner in a jump-off. Barshim, the reigning world champion, promptly inquired — “Can we have two golds?” To which the official replied -

“It’s possible, yes.”

That resounding “yes”, sent Barshim and Tamberi into ecstatic celebrations with hugs, slapping handshakes, tears and uncontrollable rolling on the floor.

The exceptional sportsmanship gesture etched a symbol of hope in our hearts and restored our faith in humanity’s kindness, humility, and friendship.

We can plot a promising trajectory in posterity if we apply these five simple lessons from the gold-sharing moment at the 2021 Tokyo Olympics to our life, work and business.

1) We can win together. One man’s win does not have to be another’s loss.

2) Play to stay in the game and not only to find a winner and a loser.

3) Together, we win more. Two golds are better than one.

4) Challenge the status quo. Barshim asked for something not done in over a century.

5) Each one, lift one. Barshim could have gone for the jump-off, believing he has the advantage as world champion. But he chose to share the Olympic champion title with his opponent.

We face significant challenges in unprecedented times. But if we are kind to one another, nature will be kind to us.

“We can change the world and make it a better place. It is in your hands to make a difference.” — Nelson Mandela.

Book recommendations

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

Here are two book recommendations on playing to stay in the game and making a difference:

a) Infinite Game by Simon Sinek

Make Your Bed. Little Things That Can Change Your Life and Maybe the World by William H. McRaven

Citations

Photo by alex bracken on Unsplash

Here are three quotes to help you play to stay in the game.

“To ask, “What’s best for me” is finite thinking. To ask, “What’s best for us” is infinite thinking.” —  Simon Sinek.

“Great leaders are the ones who think beyond “short term” versus “long term.” They are the ones who know that it is not about the next quarter or the next election; it is about the next generation.” —  Simon Sinek

“You cannot paddle the boat alone. Find someone to share your life with. Make as many friends as possible, and never forget that your success depends on others.” —  William H McRaven.

Courage Over Comfort

Step up, show up and never give up

“But you, take courage! Do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded.” — 2 Chron 15:7

Photo by Hu Chen on Unsplash

I believe we grow by pushing ourselves to attempt the unknown, the unfamiliar and the uncomfortable. And I am in constant search of ways to force myself to find the limits of my abilities. Recently, I was in a situation that tested that value.

Over the last few days, I have been questioning my unfamiliar hesitation of trying my hand at a new and promising project. Then, I realised I have become too comfortable with how things are, and I was covering up with excuses of too much work and how I need to focus on my writing career.

While thinking of how I got to this point and what to do next, I decided to rewatch Brene Brown’s Netflix special — “The Call to Courage.”

Photo by Adam Cai on Unsplash

Brene’s story of her daughter’s swimming competition experience was a poignant wake-up call.

In the story, Brene explained how her fifth-grade daughter was terrified to the point of quitting swimming the 100 metres breaststroke in a meet over one weekend. After failing to convince her parents to get her out of it, she asked if they will ground her if she scratches the heats. Her parents assured her that they would not ground her. She was free to decide what to do.

So on race day, when the officials called out the swimmers on the heat, Brene’s daughter was nowhere. Minutes after the other swimmers were in their starting position, she popped up to take block 8. Parents cheering and screaming, whistle, starting gun — off they went. Halfway through the last lap, she looked across the pool to find no other swimmers close to her. She was ahead. Or was she? With about 25 meters to go, she realised she was dead last to the point where the swimmers for the next heat were on the blocks waiting for her to finish.

While changing from her swimming gear and with her mum’s permission, she said — “that sucked.” Brene explained her daughter’s reaction at the end of the swim:

She stopped for a minute, and she was looking down, and she goes, “ But I was brave, and I won. ”

The girl won because she found the courage to compete, despite knowing she cannot control the outcome.

To win like Brene’s daughter, practice developing the following five traits to help you answer the call to courage:

1) Be willing to fail.

“If you’re not willing to fail, you can’t innovate.” — Brene Brown

2) Practice gratitude.

“When you are grateful for what you have, I understand that you understand the magnitude of what I’ve lost.” — Brene Brown

3) Learn to feel and express joy.

“ Just choose joy, frivolous and fun, no ROI, no payoff, no upside, just ordinary joy.” — Brene Brown

4) Build meaningful connections.

“In the absence of connection, love and belonging there is always suffering.” — Brene Brown

5) Be vulnerable — face uncertainty, risk and emotional exposure.

“There is no courage without vulnerability.” — Brene Brown

Brene Brown’s closing statement of her Call to Courage talk moved me into action. It gingered me to find the courage to venture once again to dare into the unknown and try the unfamiliar. Because I believe it is only when we find the courage to step out of our comfort zone that we can achieve great things.

“[It] is hard, and it’s scary. And it feels dangerous, but it’s not as hard, scary or dangerous as getting to the end of our lives and having to ask ourselves — what if I would have shown up? What if I would have said I love you? What if I would have come off the blocks?

“Show up, be seen, answer the call to courage and come off the blocks. Cause you are worth it.” — Brene Brown

Book recommendations

Here are two book recommendations on courage and vulnerability:

a) Daring Greatly: How the Courage to be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent and Lead by Brene Brown

b) Braving the Wilderness: The Quest for True Belonging and the Courage to Stand Alone by Brene Brown

Citations

Here are three quotes to help you make find the courage to dare great things.

“Success is not final; failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” —  Winston S Churchill

“Courage is the most important of all the virtues because, without courage, you can’t practice any other virtue consistently.” —  Maya Angelou

“I get so busy sometimes chasing the extraordinary moments that I don’t pay attention to the ordinary moments. The moments that if taken away, I would miss more than anything.” —  Brene Brown

7 Powerful Philosophies of A Champion

How to leave an invigorating, inspiring and indelible legacy

“Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial,…” — Jam 1:12

Dunstan on the ball — Focus, anticipation and action

Sports is back. The battle for the remote control is back. And what a record-breaking two weeks we’ve had.

The excitement from millions of fans at home and on location revelling to have our favourite pass time back is palpable. Sport is probably the only universal language of peace and unity. Or so we would like to believe. There was a welcoming respite from news on politics, wars and natural disasters. Bring on the greatest of all time (GOAT) debates that permeate all athletic disciplines.

On the “most sacred” tennis courts of Wimbledon, Novac Djokovic sent statistics tumbling with a record equally 20th grand slam title. Novac had this to say during his semi-final post-match interview:

“I am trying to take out the maximum of my [own] abilities every single match and see what happens. Giving up is never an option.”

In football (soccer), Lionel Messi lifted his first and probably the only major silverware with his beloved Argentina — the Copa America (South America) Championship. The English football team reached the final of a major competition after a 55 years hiatus, although they lost out to Italy on penalties. They broke this deadlock with the second-youngest (25.27 years) team in the tournament of 24 teams.

Sadly, the revolting subject of racism reared its ugly head yet again with a flurry of racial abuse directed at the three young black players who missed their spot-kicks. The abuse is disappointing, sickening, and disgusting. If I were writing this piece in public view, I would have done so in the players’ stance before kick-off — on one knee.

Having helped England to the final in their tender teenage years makes them champions in my book — hands down, heads up high.

And Rashford showed maturity beyond his years and a mindset of a champion when he said:

“I will never apologise for who I am and where I came from. I’ve felt no prouder moment than wearing those three lions on my chest and seeing my family cheer me on in a crowd of 10s of thousands.”

That is what sets you apart, your mindset. A champion knows losing is not failure, and winning alone does not make you are champion.

“It’s not about how hard you can hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.” —  Randy Pausch

While the racists and cyberbullies are trying to taint the three cubs who stepped up to be the real three lions of the English football team, I salute another true champion who happens to be black.

Can South Africa’s Nicholas Dlamini please stand up!

Dlamini made history by becoming the first black (South) African to participate in the world cup of cycling, the Tour de France. Unfortunately, he failed to make the cut-off time on stage 9 of the 21 stages tour. He suffered a terrible crash 199KM into the race and had to complete the remaining 25KM of climbing under pouring rain. He finished the 144KM ride 85 minutes after the winner. Dlamini was one of 10 riders eliminated on the day. Most of them gave up along the way, opting to hitch a lift to the finish line. But not, Nicholas. He chose to ride his bike to the end. An effort Sport24 called “heroic.”

Dlamini missed out on the special occasion of riding the final stage of the tour on Nelson Mandela Day, but his remarks about his heroic ride summed up the seven philosophies of a champion.

Photo by Museums Victoria on Unsplash

1. It is important to always finish what you start

“I’ve learnt quite a lot and I am excited to come back and finish the job.”

2. Never take the easy way out

“It would’ve been easier to get in the car for the final 25km with the heater on but I wanted to respect the sport and my team and honour my dream of trying to finish the race even though I was an hour and a half over the time limit.”

3. Be positive and learn from your experience

“I enjoyed the other stages; it was a good experience. I’ve learnt quite a lot, and I am excited to come back and finish the job.”

4. Inspire others to believe in themselves

“It does put pressure on me but it makes you step up as a person. This was the perfect platform to encourage kids from the townships whether they are in sports or in academics.”

5. Have an attitude of gratitude

“It’s been an incredible two weeks. I’m really happy to be granted the opportunity, and I hope it doesn’t stop here. I hope to encourage and inspire a lot of youngsters back home and in Africa.”

6. Giving up is not an option

“I always wanted to become a role model and lead by a good example. They can see that giving up is not [really] an option; you have to keep going and that there are many opportunities.”

7. Your dream must serve a greater purpose

“If you ride your bike for a greater purpose, you find motivation in what you are doing.”

To leave a positive, lasting legacy, you need to have the mindset of a champion.

“In a few years’ time, when I do retire, I want to leave a great legacy behind, knowing that there are more kids in the Tour de France and gaining opportunities.” — Nicholas Dlamini

Here are two book recommendations from me that will help you in developing a champion’s mindset:

Limitless: Upgrade your brain, Learn anything faster, and Unlock your exceptional life. by Jim KwikFailing Forward: Turning Mistakes into Stepping Stones for Success by John C Maxwell

And I leave you with these three citations:

“Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.” —  Conrad Hilton

“Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life a champion.” —  Muhammad Ali

“Whatever you do, go all the way or no way. But never halfway.” —  Dunstan Ayodele Stober

Chances, Choices and Changes

Three Steps to Discover Your Purpose

“Making the best use of time…” — Eph 5:16

Photo by Lubo Minar on Unsplash

Jean-Paul Sarte summarised life as the C between B and D. Life is made of our choices between birth and death.

Recently, my younger brother and I spent three consecutive months together for the first time in 13 years. During those 90 days in Dubai, he pushed all my buttons and tested my patience to the limit. Just like old times. We argued over house chores, food menu and assembling my furniture from IKEA.

We figured we had placed the side drawer on the left of the table after we were more than halfway through assembling my work desk. While we were arguing whose fault we bought the wrong table, we found the set of instructions on how to install the drawer for a right-handed person like me. Now we were at a crossroad — dismantle and rebuild the desk or proceed to complete the drawer on the left side.

I preferred the former, but not my brother. “It doesn’t matter. You will get used to it,” he suggested. I am now adept at using the drawer from the left side of the desk. It feels natural.

To set up the desk to fit its purpose, first, we had to choose which side to place the drawer on and then decide which steps to follow.

This experience reminded me of the three simple steps we can follow in our bid to discovering our life’s purpose.

Photo by Ethan Hu on Unsplash

i. Understand the principle of choice

“Perhaps our greatest power in life is the power to choose. Without question, choices are the most determining factor in how our lives turn out.” — John C Maxwell.

We must accept that a fulfilled life will depend on the choices we make. Nothing is absolute. Choose to be happy, choose to be free of fear and be open to exploring all possibilities. That is the principle of choice.

Our choices send instructions to our subconscious to act towards our desired outcomes. Thus, it is crucial to find your place of choice.

My brother and I had to choose between instruction A (left drawer) and instruction B (right drawer). That was our place of choice.

ii. Understand the point of decision

“Decisiveness is a characteristic of high-performing men and women. Almost any decision is better than no decision at all.” ― Brian Tracy.

Our experience, habits, religion, culture, education influence our decisions. We do make decisions in a vacuum. When we start taking these internal and external factors into action, we start moving to the point of decision.

Considering that I am right-handed, my brother and I could have decided to go with instruction B. But because we missed our place of choice, we limited our point of decision.

At the point of decision, we narrow down our choices by considering internal and external factors.

iii. Align your decisions with your values

“I believe the choice to be excellent begins with aligning your thoughts and words with the intention to require more from yourself.”  — Oprah Winfrey.

Finally, your decisions must lead you to life-defining actions that lead to desired actions aligned to your values and beliefs.

Going against your values will make you uncomfortable, uneasy and unsatisfied. Accountability, contentment, excellence, faith, love, making a difference, reliability are some of the values that guide my decisions.

Identify your core values — the things vital to you about how you live and work — the things you can and cannot do.

“Understanding the difference between the place of choice and the point of decision helps you practice identifying your feelings, whether positive or negative, so you can make inspired choices and clear, robust decisions. By visiting the place of choice first, you can obtain the confidence needed to stay motivated and take bold, life-changing actions.” — culled from The Difference Between Making A Choice And A Decision by Svetlana Whitener.

We should not be obsessed with making the right decisions. Instead, we should focus on the actions that will make our decisions right.

When given chances in life, we must choose, decide and then take life-changing actions towards our purpose.

How I Won My First Medal at 47

Six things to help you achieve your dreams

“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.” — Prov 16:3

I Love Super Sports (ILSS) Team 1 — Bronze Medal winners. Photo Credit: IRONSTAR INDOOR TRIATHLON SERIES 2021 in Dubai

As a kid, I wanted to experience how it felt to stand on one of those cubes with the number 1, 2 or 3 and wear a winner’s medal around my neck.

I spent my elementary school years making up with schoolwork for what I lacked in athletic pursuit. But, despite my failure in sports, I did not give up the idea of going after my dream of one day winning a medal in sports. So, I opted for a high school renowned for producing national sportsmen — sprinters, cricketers and footballers.

The school’s annual athletics meet consumed a month of the school calendar. Academic work almost ground to a halt. My diminutive self signed up for the long jump, high jump, 100 metres sprint, 400 metres, shot put, and javelin in my first year of high school.

Coming in dead last by some distance in the 100 metres trials did nothing to deflate my spirit. After a decent rest, I stepped up to the starting line for 400 metres trials. But this time, I did not even see the finish line. I saw stars, then puked my guts out. And that was the end of my athletic pursuits.

Or was it?

Twenty-eight years later, I took up cycling to lose weight. That goal quickly changed as my fond turned into an addiction. About three years after taking up the sport, I signed up for my first race. And my dream of winning a medal was rekindled. I raced in Johannesburg, Dar es Salaam and Dubai. I now have a decent collection of participant’s medals in my cabinet.

My latest race in Dubai was a chance event.

My coach sent me a voice message at 9:15 PM on Tuesday — “Dunstan, by the way, would you like to take part in the race this coming Saturday? It’s Ironstar indoor triathlon. I have a set of swimmer and runner looking for a cyclist to form a team. Let me know if you are interested.” Although I said I was not race-ready, he convinced me to sign up. My runner teammate greeted us on race day with, “let’s go get a podium finish, guys.” To which I replied — “Yeah, right. We are competing against some pro athletes with national-level experience. What chance do we have? Let’s just go out there, give our best and enjoy the experience.” My best I did give. And I did enjoy myself. What’s more to enjoy than spinning, singing and sweating?

Spin, sweat and smile: Photo Credit: IRONSTAR INDOOR TRIATHLON SERIES 2021 in Dubai

The objective was to get the most cumulative distance from 30 minutes of swimming, running and cycling. Then the big reveal and complimentary breakfast were about two hours later. I left the awards ceremony to grab a coffee, knowing I was there to add to my collection of participant’s medals.

The barrister was halfway preparing my americano when I bolted out across the hallway after hearing these words through the PA system from the awards ceremony. “Third place, bronze medal goes out to ILSS Team one of Dunstan Stober…”

I finally did it!

At 47 years, 6 months and 10 days, I realised my dream of winning a medal at a sports event.

A friend asked my age after seeing the photo I tagged — “My first podium finish.” “At least you have given me hope,” was her reply to my answer.”

I reminded her that Col. Sanders founded KFC at the age of 65.

You see, we all have dreams, hopes and aspirations. Your dream might be anything from winning a sporting medal to writing a book, owning a business, getting to the top of your career or being a change maker.

Whatever your dream is, you are never too old to go after it; it is never too late to achieve it.

If a young girl in a remote village in India (depicted in the movie Skater Girl) could bring hope to her village by pursuing her dream of becoming a skateboarder; if a young athlete could overcome all odds, including his father’s resistance, to become the first man to represent his country in gymnastics at the Olympics; you can birth your dream too.

The journey to my first medal, the stories of the Skater Girl from India and the Nigerian gymnast, Uche Eke, will show you how to apply these six steps in the pursuit of your dreams.

i. Prioritise your goal

“Growing up, I have been hated for doing gymnastics because it is not a black sport. But I don’t care. I want it, so I’m going to get it.” — Uche Eke

The question will help you align your goals and dreams with what makes you happy. Your goal must bring you joy and be in line with your purpose.

Uche wanted to experience the emotions of being in the Olympics more than anything. The Skater Girl said she loves to skate because it allows her to explore freedom.

Find your priority by finding the things you want to experience, explore and embrace.

ii. Work on your dream, not someone’s expectation of you

“Others can inspire you, but ultimately the only thing that empowers you is what lies within you and learning how to better utilise what you’ve been given.” ― T. D. Jakes

Are you doing it for yourself or because it is what others expect of you? You may face resistance. People may tell you it can’t do it, or you don’t have what it takes.

You will find joy if the dream is yours. And that joy will give you the strength to withstand obstacles, setbacks and disappointments.

Uche’s dad was vehemently against his gymnastics, instead wanted him to focus on engineering. His dad became one of his most prominent cheerleader after seeing Uche’s tenacity, persistence and purpose.

Live your dream. You owe it to yourself, others and the world.

iii. Don’t settle for less

“The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it, keep looking. Don’t settle.” — Steve Jobs

You will fail. You will experience setbacks and challenges. But never lower the goal because it is hard.

Combining engineering in college with gymnastics was not easy. Sometimes, Uche had to take his exams during competitions. But Uche pushed past the pain until he qualified to represent Nigeria at the 2021 Tokyo Olympics.

No matter how hard it gets, no matter how long it takes, follow your dream.

Don’t settle for less. Don’t settle for easy.

iv. Visualise success

“The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one’s destiny to do, and then do it.” — Henry Ford

What will success look like to you? How will you feel if you achieve your dream today?

I visualised myself holding a medal since I was a kid. I wanted the taste of victory and to experience the fulfilment of achieving my dream.

Let that picture of success, the feeling of victory, propel you towards your goal.

v. Take daily, consistent action

“Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” — Robert Collier

You must do something now and every day in the direction of your goal. Don’t procrastinate, don’t delay.

If you are to achieve your dream, you must take action. And the time for action is now, today, every day.

Break your dream down into monthly, weekly and daily actions. Be intentional, focused and disciplined. If you want to write a book, write one line, one paragraph or one page a day. But by all means, write daily.

Whatever your dream is, please do something about it now. Do it daily. Then measure your progress and track small wins.

vi. Believe in yourself, believe in your dream

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

“I am not strong enough.”

“I am not big enough.”

“ I don’t have what it takes.”

These are things we tell ourselves when we lack to courage to go after our dreams.

The beauty of becoming the first gymnast to represent his country, Nigeria, at the Olympics is what gave Uche Eke the strength, courage and tenacity to keep working towards his dreams.

Conquer your fear, step out of your place of ease and believe you’ve got what it takes. Let the beauty of success propel you. Believe you are enough.

What is your dream?

If you have not found it, keep looking and don’t settle.

And when you find it, make sure it is yours and not someone else’s. Then prioritise and take daily action. If you can see it with your mind’s eyes, you can achieve it.

Believe in your dreams. Believe in yourself.

7 Life Lessons I Learnt from 101 Minutes Behind Bars

“Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.” — Ecc 7:8

Me at the end of Tour De DAMAC Cyclethon. March 2021, Dubai

When it comes to exercise and fitness, there is no better place I would rather be than behind the handlebars of my bicycle. Sitting behind those handlebars helps me relax, clear my head and get in shape. Six years after taking up the sport, I am enjoying it more than ever. I have grown in confidence that I can now enter amateur races to challenge myself.

The Dubai Spinneys 92 event on 2 April 2021 was my seventh amateur race in Dubai. Building from the confidence of completing the 92KM main event of the 2019 edition, I registered for three out of four build-up rides and the main event of the 2020/21edition. However, the event was not exempt from the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic. The organisers had to cancel one of the build-up rides due to lockdown restrictions and postpone the main event three times. The Dubai authorities finally cleared the event to go ahead on 2 April 2021. There was a much smaller field of riders compared to the last challenge. But the low turn out did nothing to dampen the mood of the participating riders.

The race officials flagged us off just before 0800 hours. Masks off, pedals clicked in, onto our saddles and handlebars, the race was finally off. While the scenery along the 62KM route was breathtaking, this ride was not for sightseeing or social media photoshoot. It would have been nice to capture some images of two of Dubai’s famous landmarks — the Dubai 2020 Expo site and the Global Village. But my focus was mainly on the wheel in front of me and my handlebars. The pace was fast, and I could feel it was an outstanding effort by my standards. With 500M to go, I accelerated out of the group in a dash to the finish line, which I crossed after 101 minutes. Four months earlier, I completed a similar distance in 118 minutes. Although the 62KM was not the main event, it was a great race all the same.

Although the short course was scheduled to start an hour after the 92 KM race, I arrived two hours early to avoid road closures leading up to the venue. I took my time to prepare my bike then set my alarm before stretching out in my car for a 45 minutes nap. I woke up to find I was the only cyclist in the parking lot. A rush of sweat ran down my face in panic. I thought I had missed the start of the race. Lucky for me, the race did not start until 20 minutes after I got to the starting line.

I pressed the start button on my Garmin bike computer and waited for the beep to signify the start of recording my race time. No beep! I looked down with concern to stare at a blank screen. The pack of riders were pulling away while I was fiddling with the Garmin to no avail. Plan B. I took out my phone from my back pocket to record my ride using the Strava App. Beep, beep — no satellite signal. There was no plan C. But I had the race timing chip strapped to my left ankle to record official timing. All else failing, I pushed on hard to catch up with the pack of riders ahead of me. Although I could not tell how fast we were going, I felt the pace was good. I had no choice but to go with the flow. Also, I could not tell the distance we had covered. Riding blind in a race can be disorienting. But, I decided to put all that mishap out of my head and just race.

I assumed we were halfway through when we turned a roundabout to ride in the opposite direction. Just then, I felt my body go into shutdown mode; I felt like I was riding backwards. Once again, the leading pack of riders was pulling away from me. My legs and lungs were telling me I had reached the limit of my practice rides between 30–35 KMs. But I was not about to end my race there. I summoned every last bit of energy left in my body and changed to a standing position. With the burn in my legs, I pedalled my way back into the pack. Now it was as if they were riding backwards. The relief of rejoining the leading group filled me with the freshness I had at the start of the race. I had broken the pain barrier and gotten out of my comfort zone. With that burst of energy, I felt the urge to chase down a breakaway pack. “Be patient during the ride. Resist the temptation to attack too early.” Those words from my coach gave me the disciple to hold back and maintain a steady pace. It wasn’t long before we caught up with the breakaway pack some reasonable distance before the finish line. At the 500 meters mark, I pulled away with a burst of speed I did not know I still had in the tank. 100 meters to the line, cameras flashing, I let go of my handlebars to take my favourite Wakanda pose. My moment of glory. Or so I thought.

After the finish line, we rolled into a queue of volunteers handing out the finisher’s medals and face masks. I pensively drove home to wait anxiously for the provisional official results with no way of knowing what time I posted. I received the results, in chronological order, in my email three hours later. A fist pump and shout replaced the broad smile on my face as I did not have to scroll farther down the 8th row to find my race number and name. Next to my name was a time of 1hour and 41 minutes — 19 minutes quicker than the 120 minutes target I had set for myself. My time was only 16 seconds behind the best time in that category. And I recorded my fastest pace in the final 13.5 KM.

Would I have recorded the fastest time if I did not have the technical glitch at the start? Choosing to ignore this mishap is one lesson plus six others I learnt during the race that I felt are relevant to the many races we face in life.

1) Do better than your last best

I consider the 2021 Spinneys 92 race my best one to date. And that is not because of my position on the leader board. Sure, I should be proud of a top 10 finish. Sixteen seconds behind the fastest time is worth celebrating.

My coach’s response to my time was, “Wow! Impressive result DAS! Great Job. Way way less than your target of 2hrs.”

He did not ask about how I placed. Instead, he checked my time against the two-hour target I set for myself to improve on my previous attempt.

In life, we dilute the magnitude of our achievements when we compare ourselves against those who have done better than us. Doing so steals our joy, and we end up being ungrateful and unappreciative of how far we have come.

I did not let that happen to me this time. I was super proud and excited about my result because it was better than my previous best.

Do not undermine the size of your efforts. Be grateful, be happy for your progress no matter how small it may seem.

“Comparison isn’t the thief of joy. It’s the thief of everything. Keep your eyes on your purposeful path. Celebrate others. Celebrate progress, not perfection. Cultivate gratitude over comparison. Gratitude turns what we have into more than enough.”  — Lara Casey

2) Stay in your lane

Photo by Serghei Trofimov on Unsplash

After six years, you would have thought there is not much left for me to learn about cycling or my bike. But I recently signed up with a cycling coach to learn cycling basics — mechanics, pedalling and bike handling. I found the courage to accept the things I do not know for me to learn and grow. I believe this attitude is the start of growth — the courage to admit what you do not know. In the same light, I had signed up for the short course instead of the 92 KM distance.

After all, I have done it before, and I have been riding for over six years. But, I accepted that I was out of shape, not fit to go the distance.

I stayed in my lane. The result justified the decision. My limit up to that point was 33 KMs in one hour or 65 KMs in two. I accepted my limitation, faced it and beat it.

“Know your limits, not so that you can honour them, but so that you can smash them to pieces and reach for magnificence.”  — Cherie Carter-Scott

3) Focus on the things you can control

Photo by Michal Vrba on Unsplash

I never go on a leisure cycling ride without my Garmin bike computer, let alone race without it. With my Garmin, I know how fast I am going, how far I have gone, and my chain positions on the gears. Without it, I can not regulate my ride. I will be riding blind.

I had two choices when my bike computer froze at the start of the race. I could have worried about it, allowed it to distract me and lose focus on what was important. Or, ignore the mishap, put it behind me and ride.

The earlier we get over our setbacks, the faster we can set ourselves up for the comeback. There is no victory without a challenge, setback or difficulty. Therefore, it is not about the setback but how we react to it that determines if we succeed or fail.

“You can’t calm the storm. So stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.”  — Timber Hawkeye

4) Surround yourself with people better than you

Photo by paolo candelo on Unsplash

The phrase, “you are the average of the five people with whom you associate,” may be overused, but it is too apt, profound and timelessly relevant to ignore.

Probably, the fastest time I have recorded over 30+ KM distance in my solo practice rides is 32 KMPH. I clocked almost 37 KMPH in the 62 KM race because I rode with much stronger and faster riders than me. I cannot improve if I am the quickest rider in my practice group.

I had to push past the pain barrier, ride outside my comfort zone to hang onto the pack of faster riders to finish with my best time in six years.

“Surround yourself with people who are smarter, faster, stronger and better than you so you can be uplifted by their models and inspired by their examples.”  — Robin Sharma

5) Get a coach

Photo by Adrià Crehuet Cano on Unsplash

He did not say much. He did not try to tell me how to ride. Instead, my coach told me what no one had ever told me. And something I found hard to accept. “Be patient out there. Hold your pace, and do not attack too early. Be patient on the climb, be patient on the downhill to conserve energy,” he said.

If I had attacked with the breakaway riders early on, I would not have had the stamina to keep going when my body almost shut down. My coach’s echoing words restrained me when it was critical so that I could finish at a pace I knew I could.

We all need a coach to bring out the best in us.

“A coach is someone who tells you what you don’t want to hear, who has you see what you don’t want to see, so you can be who you always knew you could be.”  — Tom Landry

6) Don’t celebrate at the right time

Celebrating the finish of my 62 KM race. April 2021, Dubai

The timing of the celebration is as important as the celebration itself. A lesson that left me asking, what if. What if I did not celebrate with the Wakanda pose before crossing the finish line? What if I had kept going? I can only assume I would have posted a better time if I timed my celebration right.

“Timing and accuracy is really what matters at the end of the day.” — Carson Wentz

7) Finish better than you started

I was most satisfied to see that my pace in the last 13.5 KM was 38 KMPH compared to the 28 KMPH of my first 3 KM. My pace kept getting better with each KM of the ride.

My race times

And that’s how I want to finish every race, not just cycling.

“It is not how you start the race or where you are during the race; it is how you cross the finish line that will matter.”  — Robert D. Hales

I encourage you to face your career, business and life in general like a race. It has a start and an end. There will be setbacks, distractions and challenges. Sometimes, you will feel you are not ready, and at other times you may feel like giving up. People might let you down; things may not work according to plan. Yes, others will compete against you for that promotion at work or a new job or compete against your business. Just remember, it’s a race in which you achieve success by knowing that you did your best, better than your last effort. Winning does not always mean success, and losing is not always a failure.

You will only grow and succeed when you step out of your comfort zone. Know your limit not to be paralysed by it but to surpass it. No matter how hard it gets, keep pressing on to finish your race stronger than you started. Only then would you have earned the right to celebrate.

“I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”  — 2 Tim 4:7

In my new book — Joy Has Come Home, I cover deeper insights on how the above lessons have helped me in my career and business.

Please visit my website to get your copy on Amazon:

https://www.joyhascomehome.com/

Joy Has Come Home

The Six Most Impactful Lessons I Learnt from My 30 Days “I Am” Affirmations Challenge

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made…” — Ps 139:14

Photo by Felicia Buitenwerf on Unsplash

I can go out on a limb to say I am not alone with the need for a change of scene. Or at least to have that feeling of going to work, closing and getting back home. The idea of working from home has turned into a living-at-work phenomenon. We have gone from talking about work-life balance to balancing life at work.

What was I expecting after a 10KMs drive to a public library? It was closed. I went out to look for answers within the pages of books, but I returned with questions in my head. How will we come out of this the pandemic? Will we look back at this whole lockdown period as wasted time or quality time? In my view, that depends on what we are becoming. Are we using this time to build up, or deviate from, the identity that we want for ourselves?

“What you become is more important than what you get.” — Jim Rohn

The Two Most Powerful Words that Shape Your Identity

I did not like whom I was becoming at the start of the lockdown — lazy, unhealthy and clumsy. I was procrastinating on my writing, developing poor eating habits and putting off exercise. Luckily, I caught myself before the bad habits piled to irreversible levels. This consciousness is what led me to come up with a 30-days challenge to myself which I shared on Facebook and Medium for my followers to join. You can read about the “challenge” here and do it for any consecutive 30 days that you choose.

If there is power in the spoken word, then we must be conscious of what we tell ourselves. That is what I set out to do — tell myself each morning for 30 days whom I want to become in my faith, family, finances, fitness and fun. With the exercise done and dusted, I know it was worth it. It helped me reinforce some disciplines and a renewed belief in myself, backed up by some valuable lessons that I learnt along the way.

Here are the seven most impactful lessons that I learned:

1) Not everyone will catch on to your vision

“We are the people that we’ve been waiting for, and no one else is coming.” — Bishop T D Jakes

The blog post that contained the 30-days challenge got 103 reads on Medium with almost 40% read rate. I was sure that the challenge would attract a sizeable number of participants. Guess what?

Only one of my readers made it from start to end with me. But I did not relent or quit. I would have done it, even if no else came on the journey.

2) You can make a difference one person at a time

“As one person, I cannot change the world, but I can change the world of one person.” — Paul Shane Spear

There were days when I felt like giving up on the challenge. After all, no one else was doing it with me. But I was doing this for me. I was the one who needed motivation. I found that motivation in the one person who kept up with the challenge. More than once, I left like throwing in the towel, but then the Facebook notification of that one post will spur me to continue.

Do not stop what you are doing because you never know who you may be inspiring.

3) Give your best to an audience of one or one thousand

“The size of your audience doesn’t matter. What’s important is that your audience is listening.” — Randy Pausch

In as much as I set out the do the challenge to build myself up, I wanted to inspire others to do the same. To start each day with the right mindset, priming our subconscious mind with an affirmation of whom we want to become.

Of the over 40 people who read the post, and the many more who liked it on Facebook, only one person took up the challenge. But, I did not stop or become careless just because it was one person.

I gave the performance I would have given if the audience was one thousand, ten thousand or a hundred thousand.

4) Consistency is the key to achieving results

“Step by step, and the thing is done.” — Charles Atlas

Although I had set out my posts I advance, it was still a struggle in the beginning. I still had work to do before I could check the goal of my list. Well into the second week, I found it much easier because I had built the momentum. Tiny steps, small acts every day breeds the disciple to success. If I had procrastinated for only a day, it would have turned into two days missed. And that would have been that.

If you want to become an author, write consistently. If you want to become an athlete, practice daily. If you want to earn a degree, study regularly.

5) We believe what we tell ourselves, and we become what we believe

“ Our mind is a mental factory. Whatever you think about all day long pours ingredients into this mental factory and that’s what builds the social, economic, financial fabric of your life. As you think, so you become. — Jim Rohn

What we tell ourselves influences what we think about in our minds. And what we think about is who we become eventually.

I found that adding affirmations to my other morning routines set me up for a productive day. The words build self-confidence, and the self-confidence determines my focus which informs my actions. Those actions reinforce confidence, thus creating a confidence loop.

6) Having a system is critical to achieving your goals

“Goals are good for setting direction, but systems are best for making progress.” — James Clear (Atomic Habits)

30 “I am” affirmations each day — that was the goal.

A week before June 1, 2020, I came up with 21 affirmations, sorted under the first three categories of faith, family and finances. Then, I used the next three weeks to plan out the remaining nine affirmations carefully.

I would not have been able to achieve my goal without that system in place. I would have failed during the days when I was late in posting my affirmation.

I have used the lesson on my workout routine. My goal was to drop my weight to 85KG and stay fit. The experience was like a yo-yo until I switched my focus from checking my weight every morning to building a system of working out every evening with a preset plan of activities 30 days ahead. This reading cannot be correct, I said. Maybe it is the floor. I repositioned the electronic scale, stood up and gazed in amazement when the counter stop, for the third time, at 83.2 KG. That is the lightest I have been in two years. My workouts do not feel like a chore any more. The system has helped me build a healthy habit which was my day 24 affirmation — I AM HEALTHY!

Get hold of your vision and run with it. Not for the applause but for the difference it will make, even if to the life of one. And for what it will make of you to go after it.

Small, consistent actions each day are the key to massive success. Therefore, build a system that will keep you moving towards your goal, one step, one day at a time.

“The purpose of setting goals is to win the game. The purpose of building systems is to continue playing the game.” — James Clear

Here are my 30 affirmations to inspire to come up with yours:

1) I am a child of God

2) Blessed

3) Winner

4) am a victor

5) Enough

6) Grateful

7) Fearfully and wonderfully made

8) Provider

9) Protector

10) Generous

11) Thoughtful

12) Confident

13) Extraordinary

14) Happy

15) An entrepreneur

16) A Blessing

17) Prosperous

18) Productive

19) Able

20) Fruitful

21) Powerful

22) Strong

23) Fearless

24) Healthy

25) Resilient

26) Courageous

27) Adaptable

28) Excited about the future

29) I am in perfect balance and harmony

30) I am valuable

The Two Most Powerful Words that Shape Your Identity

“For God hath not give us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love and of a sound mind.” — 2 Tim 1:7

Photo by Chris Curry on Unsplash

The media is awash with news, tweets and memes about the source, cause and effects of the Coronavirus. There is no shortage of, nor an end to, the mounting conspiracy theories about the virus. And yet the subject remains potently divisive. There are believers and unbelievers, saints and sinners; heck, fruits and vegetables have tested positive for the virus in some countries. COVID-19 statistics have replaced sports scores on social media. As the pandemic rages on, lockdowns are turning into showdowns of defiance in hard-hit places. Despite all the controversies and conspiracies, maybe, we can all agree on one thing — that the virus has had devastating effects across the globe. Either through our action or inaction, economies are taking a bashing; businesses are failing while families are mourning the loss of loved ones. The pandemic is even putting our faith to the test.

But as with everything in life, there are always two sides — negative and positive. The lockdowns have given some people a chance to see clear skies in their cities for the first time in a very long time. Families are spending more time together. And some people have been able to use this time to explore that passion project which they have been putting off in the name of “there is no time.” For some of us, something as mundane as grocery shopping for the family is an achievement made possible by COVID-19.

During one of my trips to the grocery store recently, I did not imagine that I would be making a life decision about which space to park my car. This spot here; no that one over there, what about the one close to the entrance? Yes, the car park was like a desolate place after an alien invasion. As I walked towards the hallway of the mall, I noticed the now-familiar notice in all public establishments — “face mask is mandatory.” And to the left of the sign was a black metal gadget. It was a foot-operated hand sanitiser. You apply pressure to the pedal for the device to squirt a portion of the liquid to your hands. This gadget is impressive; I thought to myself as I walked away, applying the sanitiser to my hands. It is one example of a positive spin-off from COVID-19. People are finding new opportunities from all the bleakness of the pandemic. From App developers to fashion designers, entrepreneurs see opportunities to grow their businesses.

Photo by James Besser on Unsplash

Personally, there are a few positives as well. The past eight weeks is the most prolonged period that I have spent with my family in three years. I have also taken the time to get my passion projects back on track. On top of that list is my passion for writing. My writing goal is to finish writing my first book by the end of July 2020. Although office work is probably more demanding than BC (before COVID-19), I have been able to establish a system that allows for some “me time.” That “me time” includes praying, playing and dinning together with my family. But the dinning together part has led to something else. In less than two weeks of being at home, I had gained close to 6KGs, tipping the scale at just over 90KGs (I do not need to be precise here, do I?). The healthy diet regime that I had adapted was out of the window. I stopped exercising under the guise that I am not allowed to go out cycling, as if cycling is the only form of exercise. Then I started making excuses and using the two most powerful words in the English diction. The two words that shape how we see ourselves, that shape what we believe to be our capabilities and ultimately create our identity, albeit in our subconscious minds. Those two words are short, but they pack a punch.

“They say the two most powerful words in the English language are the shortest: “I am”. Whatever you put after those two words, determines your identity.” — Jim Kwik (from the book Limitless)

Yes. With the weight piling back on, I started saying things like “I am big-boned”, “I am ageing, and my metabolism is slowing down.” Thankfully, I caught myself in my tracks. I soon realised that those statements were only breeding indiscipline, lack of commitment and dragging me into my comfort zone. I was creating an identity that I do not want.

The words I put after “I am” are critical in creating the change in habits that I need to get back to shape. I needed to change how I see myself and to take action towards my health goals. The first step is to, consciously, dismantle the big-bones, older man identity. Next is to replace it with a new identity of a disciplined and active young man. And finally, I will have to take decisive, consistent and disciplined action.

What we say after “I am” is not mere positive talk. We indeed become what we repeatedly hear either from others or from what we tell ourselves. Creating the right mental picture by saying who we are is the first step towards becoming unstoppable.

So, I ask you. Do you know who you are?

Photo by Jaco Pretorius on Unsplash

I have a challenge for you which I will call the “30 Days to Becoming Unstoppable” challenge. When we start to tell ourselves who we want to be, we will be reprogramming our minds, repositioning our goals and reinforcing the identity that we desire for ourselves.

In the next 30 days, every morning starting from 1st June 2020, I want you to think of one statement that defines who you are and then you post it on your Facebook wall and tag me (@Dunstan Ayodele Stober). Together we will create an unstoppable movement of people who know who they are.

Did you just say this sounds like positive affirmations? If so, you are partly right because they are. But, here is how we will go about the exercise differently to get results.

“As you begin changing your thinking, start immediately to change your behaviour. Begin to act the part of the person you would like to become. Take action on your behaviour. Too many people want to feel, then take action. This never works.” — John Maxwell

We will not wait to feel like it before we act. We will do it until we feel like it.

1) We will focus on five primary areas of life — faith, family, finances, fitness and fun. We will dedicate one week of the month to build our identity in these five areas:

a. 1–7 June: Faith

b. 8–14 June: Family

c. 15–21 June: Finances

d. 22–30 June: Fitness and fun

2) Identify the negative things that we tell ourselves unconsciously. For example, I sometimes tell myself that I am not an author because I have not written any books yet. What are your negative beliefs? Jim Kwik calls them ANTs — automatic negative thoughts.

3) Replace the negative talk with the positive identity statements that you will post on Facebook. For example, I start saying that I write and therefore, I am an author. What will be your “I am” statements?

4) Make a journal of the habits that you need to stop and the ones that you need to start to internalise the identity that you want to create. For example, I start with writing daily, no matter how small. I need to get a coach to help me write my first book.

5) Take action every day. Words alone will not make us unstoppable. It is the start of the process of changing our mindset and our belief system. But we need to take action to avoid despair. According to Joan Baez, “action is the antidote for despair.” In my case, one of my actions was to get a writing coach. I have researched on my book topic. And now, I will write every day until I finish the book.

Please drop me a private Facebook message (or email me, if you have my email) if you would like me to be your unstoppable accountability partner during the 30 days challenge.

Change your words, change your thinking and take action.

I am unstoppable; are you?

“It’s simple, but not easy.” — Jim Rohn

Ps: Do not forget to tag me @Dunstan Ayodele Stober on Facebook, and you will be among the first that I will notify when my new book is out.

Resource:

Here is an article about positive self-affirmations, their origins, neuroscientific research to support their effectiveness and their benefits.

Positive Daily Affirmations: Is There Science Behind It?

Questions Are The Answers

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” —  Matt 7:7

Ask the right questions to take action and turn knowledge into power.

Photo by Museums Victoria on Unsplash

Earlier this year (2020), during a visit to my parents in Freetown, we were reminiscing about my childhood. “The pastor is here, sir” is my parents’ favourite story. During our final year play at Kindergarten, the teachers could not find a part for me because I was too shy. But somehow my mum convinced the teacher to allow me to do the barest stage time possible. “Ok, Dunstan. All you have to do is get on stage to announce the arrival of the pastor.” I came out, shaking like a leaf, and muttered: “the… the pastor is here, sir.” Mum, said I took off for the backstage as if my life depended on it. But the story that cracked everyone up the most in the room was the one about my inquisitiveness.

“Boy, our friends would run away from you and your barrage of questions,” Mama recalled. Frustrated from losing several rounds of a board game to a family friend, I asked him; “do you think you are clever than God?” Dad reminded me that my nickname was the question master. My questions ranged from the thought-provoking to the ridiculous. “Why can’t we touch the sky? Where does the sun go in the evening? If God made us, then who made God?”

Well, I have not stopped being curious. And through this, I have learnt that the best way to learn is to ask questions.

“Questions, in fact, are the answer.” — Jim Kwik (from his book, Limitless)

But questions in themselves are not enough useless we are willing, ready and able to take action on the answers we get. I picked up Jim Kwik’s book in search of the answer to this question — How can I learn better and faster? Jim proposes the following three questions as part of the learning journey. When we come across new information or knowledge, we must ask the following questions:

“How can I use this?”

“Why must I use this?”

“When will I use this?”

And these are the questions that I set out to answer when I posted a survey on Facebook using “sogosurvery.” I wanted to find out what career questions and challenges the respondents have that I can help them with through my, close to, 25 years of experience working in seven countries.

I will like to say thank you to all those who took time out to respond to the survey. The responses have given great insights that will help me to fulfil one of my life goals.

How can I use the survey responses? I will use the answers to narrow down on the topic for my first book, which I will complete in June 2020.

Why must I use the responses? I want my book to help my readers address the most challenging questions that they are facing in their careers.

When will I use the insights that I received? I will use it now and throughout the writing of my book.

If you like to receive a chapter from my book for free and also get an email notification when I publish the book, please drop your email at the end of the survey in the link below.

Survey Participation

Also, to find out more about how to use questions to unlock doors to best self, please read my post in the link below.

Questions can Unlock Doors if we Ask the right ones