Andrew Moore's Blog, page 24
February 18, 2025
Regarding the Latest Controversy
No, people made out of gold would be useful only for melting down. They can stand outside the doors at galas as well. I was not calling for a profitable little murder at some undefined point in the future.
February 16, 2025
The Three Ages of Man
"I will make men of gold," the first god declared, "beautiful and immune to corruption."
"I will make men of iron," the second god declared, "strong and hard, impervious to the attacks of beasts."
"I will make men of a bunch of stuff I grabbed," the third god declared.
"What's the advantage of that?" the others asked.
"I've got a hundred out already while you two are working on your first. Watch out there, pal! Can't have the eyes be different sizes! My people have already overrun the world, but keep working on it."
Therefore we await the advent of the men of gold and the men of iron, because they will probably be helpful to us, the rulers of everything beneath heaven, when finally they come.
Finis
"I will make men of iron," the second god declared, "strong and hard, impervious to the attacks of beasts."
"I will make men of a bunch of stuff I grabbed," the third god declared.
"What's the advantage of that?" the others asked.
"I've got a hundred out already while you two are working on your first. Watch out there, pal! Can't have the eyes be different sizes! My people have already overrun the world, but keep working on it."
Therefore we await the advent of the men of gold and the men of iron, because they will probably be helpful to us, the rulers of everything beneath heaven, when finally they come.
Finis
February 15, 2025
Appropriate Sayings
You used to be able to say "X will endure as long as King's Raid," and you still can, but it means something totally different now.
February 14, 2025
Addendum
The prurient parody of version of Loom will feature a character named Throbbin Bedbare.
February 13, 2025
Considering Unconventional Markets
What do you think the market for fantasy and science fiction audio cassettes these days is? What do you mean, none? The rich backstory of Loom was on tape. You think you're better than Loom? What do you mean, yes?
February 11, 2025
Addendum
"Tidal fantasy" refers to how the tides have shifted in various ways, but there will definitely be giant whales that eat whole ships in it.
Q&A Corner
Q. How do I get across that my setting is full of magic and grand deeds?
A. Slivers of dead gods are a standard currency.
Q. How do I get across that my setting has dragons in it?
A. Here's the first line: "That was the day I saw a dragon."
Q. How do I get across that my orcs are noble and cool and stuff?
A. Here's the title: Neo-Fantasy Is All Out of Ideas
Q. What comes after neo-fantasy?
A. Rachet fantasy, then palin-fantasy, then intimate fantasy (intasy), then tidal fantasy.
A. Slivers of dead gods are a standard currency.
Q. How do I get across that my setting has dragons in it?
A. Here's the first line: "That was the day I saw a dragon."
Q. How do I get across that my orcs are noble and cool and stuff?
A. Here's the title: Neo-Fantasy Is All Out of Ideas
Q. What comes after neo-fantasy?
A. Rachet fantasy, then palin-fantasy, then intimate fantasy (intasy), then tidal fantasy.
February 9, 2025
Hero of Competence
Five men met at a crossroads and one slew the other four. That was common enough, but strangely, he said this.
"Each of those men committed a crime. The first was weakness, the second incapability, the third powerlessness, and the fourth clumsiness. Until now you have regarded trivialities as sins and ignored the true transgressions. Correct your behavior."
Everyone who heard the story reconsidered his way of life, not wishing to be killed by a powerful warrior. In the end, the people as a whole concluded they ought to hunt him down and kill him rather than be found wanting by his standards instead of their own.
They confronted the man, but he simply laughed. "Don't you know? The men I killed are the north, the south, the east, and the west, for everyone in every direction is at fault and will die someday until you realize your own incompetence are what keep you from immortality. As for me, I don't represent anything. I'm just the first to figure it out."
The people of the world stabbed him for hours without killing him, at the end of which they admitted they were bad. He told them that was the foundation and left. From that day, true sages began to appear in the world.
Finis
"Each of those men committed a crime. The first was weakness, the second incapability, the third powerlessness, and the fourth clumsiness. Until now you have regarded trivialities as sins and ignored the true transgressions. Correct your behavior."
Everyone who heard the story reconsidered his way of life, not wishing to be killed by a powerful warrior. In the end, the people as a whole concluded they ought to hunt him down and kill him rather than be found wanting by his standards instead of their own.
They confronted the man, but he simply laughed. "Don't you know? The men I killed are the north, the south, the east, and the west, for everyone in every direction is at fault and will die someday until you realize your own incompetence are what keep you from immortality. As for me, I don't represent anything. I'm just the first to figure it out."
The people of the world stabbed him for hours without killing him, at the end of which they admitted they were bad. He told them that was the foundation and left. From that day, true sages began to appear in the world.
Finis
February 8, 2025
Future Automotive Aesthetics
In World War II, people tried out all kinds of tanks, but now they're more or less all the same. Will that happen to cars? Should our science fiction settings have personal car, bulk cargo car, armored car, and nothing else? Or will they have more varieties than ever because improved industrial capacity will make more particular designs possible? I think the former, but I don't care about cars at all.
