Graham Johns's Blog, page 2

How to Write a Novel…in My Opinion

I’ve recently finished a first draft of the fifth (yes FIFTH!) novel in the Annals of Nether-Staining series (update on that soon). If you’ve never heard of it (and with a saturated market place you wouldn’t be alone) then in essence it is comedy sci-fi which strays into murder, horror, romance (of a sort), religion and more. It’s certainly genre-busting.

The first thing I would say is that to write then you should probably read, because if you don’t have a grasp on how a story hangs together then you may not be able to write one.

Anyway, I was thinking about how I write in a way that works for me. There are a lot of authors out there who would tell you that there should probably be a certain process you should follow (I dare say creative writing courses do just this also) but deep down I think the first major rule is that if I’m not enjoying writing it then you probably won’t enjoy reading it. So if the story starts to feel like a slog to write then I change direction a bit.

When I wrote “Baabaric“, my first novel, I effectively made it up as I went along and let the story flow. This worked well for me but before I began “Stoned” (which is a more complex tale with several moving parts) I decided to make a detailed plan. I started to write to this plan but I really hated it because I had lost a part of the writing that I enjoyed, namely puzzle solving. I like it when characters get into a dead end because I have to think to create a way out of it for them and this keeps things energised and entertaining for me, and so hopefully for the reader too. Without the freedom to change direction and be creative throughout, I don’t care for writing fiction. Ever since this, with “Pickled” and “Blasphemy” and the upcoming fifth volume, I stick to what I enjoy creatively.

This is very different for the non-fiction books I have published. For “Theatre of Life“, the memoirs of my grandfather, it was a labour of love to publish his words posthumously and was all about trying to fact-check and collate different parts of his life (and different media sources – even including an old cassette tape!) into a coherent tale of social history, WWII and pantomime. Very much about process but extremely worthwhile.

For “Puppy Dog Tale“, a memoir about raising a guide dog, I worked out the main chapters I felt needed to be in there and the items I wanted to write about and went from there. It was far more about process but the creative element still existed in terms of how I wrote about the experience.

After that, the editing comes along, which I always think is the most important (and far more challenging) part because, if you care about your audience and have some pride in what you publish, you can always spot things you can do differently or better and, of course, spelling mistakes (this is especially true when you capitalise or even invent certain words).

Ultimately though, without a passion of some kind for the content, there is no point writing at all. I wish all authors thought like that rather than sometimes it feeling, to the reader, like it is just a process.

Is It Really Social? Calling All Readers…and Authors!

During my fairly substantial hiatus from social media channels over the past couple of years, I’ve had a lot of time in which to ponder the channels themselves and the way in which people use them. When I first began using WordPress a number of years ago to write a blog about my adventures in a new country, it was like entering a whole new world where people write interesting articles and I could follow them if I wanted with no pressure at all, or expectations that someone would follow me back. That was then. It was a joy and I felt like I met like-minded people.

And now we add in the writing of books and the hope that I can utilise social media to get them noticed. The social media world looks quite different through this lens.

It feels like social media is not really social at all. On Twitter, for example, once you have finished wading through the copious amounts of advertising, you find a lot of people who basically exist on there to put out meaningless nonsense in the name of having something to say (which they really don’t) and desperately trying to expand their follower base. I don’t believe the Twitter community are overly interested in anything they follow, but nor do I feel they can be THAT interested because they can’t actually see it in amongst the aforementioned adverts, and nor is there enough time in a day to respond to everything they may follow. Go figure. So do I shut it down? I’m not sure. It is after all another medium of communication and it might be cutting off my nose to spite my face. But then that same channel is going through a highly dubious ownership and direction change.

I always felt that Facebook had similar issues to Twitter.

And is anyone on WordPress looking for their next read? I’m not sure about that either, though there are plenty of folks reviewing books. The community still feels more genuine to me though, like there is less pressure and it is more about people expressing their passions.

I’ve yet to work out what value Goodreads has because I’m not overly sure how to leverage that channel.

So we come to the purpose of this post, namely whether anyone has any thoughts on how, as an author, to best use social media? All thoughts welcome.

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A Dog Isn’t Just For Christmas…

Dear Reader

With the recent publishing of my new memoir, “Puppy Dog Tale“, about raising a guide dog puppy, I thought I should make sure that the message that a dog is not just for Christmas gets out there.

I hope you have discovered my tome for yourself by now…but if not…well…here is a friendly face to perhaps persuade you…”Puppy Dog Tale” is available now from all good Amazon outlets in e-book and paperback formats…just in time for the festive season and maybe finding a place in your stocking…

Puppy Dog Tale – Available Now!

My posts are apparently like buses, you wait ages for one to come along and then another one turns up shortly after…amazing!

Great news – Puppy Dog Tale – A Puppy-Sized Memoir About Raising a Guide Dog is available now from Amazon as an e-book or Paperback. It tells the story of my attempts to raise a puppy to perform a role that is potentially truly life-changing.

Please click here for all the details you need…

I sincerely hope that you are interested and, if so, that you consider a download or purchase…and if you do then I thank you in advance.

Happy Christmas and New Year to everyone!

I’ve Been Gone For Too Long

Hi Everyone, I hope this finds you all well…

We’ve all had almost two trips around the sun since my last post. While I doubt anyone will have been caused undue worry during my absence, the time is right to tell you about what I have been doing in that time…

This time can primarily be split into two distinct phases…voluntarily raising a guide dog puppy and then writing a memoir about the experience of doing so.

And the great news is that said memoir, Puppy Dog Tale, will be available on Amazon in just a few days. You will be able to opt for the Kindle edition or the Paperback – this time in colour (a little more expensive than monochrome but it makes the pictures of an adorable puppy come alive that way).

For now…here is a picture of the cover…I will let you know once it goes live…

Take care!

Say Ten Hail Marys

If you haven’t got “Blasphemy” yet (why not?), you must have sinned. But it’s OK, you can be absolved if you head to Nether-Staining right away…but just be careful when you get there…they don’t care for outsiders much…

But start with “Baabaric” and work forward to “Stoned” and “Pickled” before you blaspheme…just click on the individual titles to learn more…allow yourself to be entertained and support new authors instead of the same old ones you always read…

But don’t just take my word for it…here are some things that unbiased reviewers have said…visit Nether-Staining, it’s the place to be…especially over Christmas when you’re locked down and indoors…

“Captured country life brilliantly. Some really good laugh-out-loud moments in here, especially in the opening scenes in the pub. Loved the banter between the 3 main characters especially when they adopt their ‘super-hero’ avatars toward the climax. Characters very well written and personable.”

“The three main protagonists regularly struggle to find their way back from the pub, and now they find themselves responsible for trying to save Yorkshire. Just when you think you know what kind of book Baabaric is, it surprises you and takes you in another direction. A crazy, fun romp to be enjoyed with a pint of Yorkshire ale and a bag of pork scratchings.”

“I was expecting something along the lines of animal farm gone mad, but this was more Last of the Summer Wine in parts. Some gentle humour, some silly bits that had me giggling and a relaxing read.”

“The characters are worthy of a Masterpiece Theater mystery or a Monty Python movie.”

“What a fun read.”

“Great book if you’re in for a laugh and are ready to delve into a new and absorbing world.”

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Have You Never Visited Nether-Staining?

Nether-Staining, just inside the Yorkshire-Lancashire border (on the good side), is an odd place. On the surface, it’s a village where the primary pursuits consist of sheep farming and drinking Priest’s Hole ale.

But remember, this is Yorkshire, and Yorkshire is coveted by many…it is God’s county after all…and Nether-Staining is right on the front line.

And when jealousy runs rife elsewhere, it is only a matter of time before things come to a head…and so it is that the Annals of Nether-Staining chronicle this comedy-sci-fi-mystery-horror-religious mayhem…click on the book titles for Amazon links…and I bid thee welcome…for a small financial investment, you’ll wish you were living there…

EPISODE ONE – BAABARIC

Nether-Staining, Yorkshire, is a quiet little place, populated by simple farming folk who enjoy nothing more than the delight of a Priest’s Hole ale at the Dog & Duck tavern…but their peace is about to be shattered.

Strange things are happening to Gordon Shepherd’s sheep, the pub landlord has started reciting poetry, they’re painting the inside of the church a deep shade of red and there is a peculiar individual about who resembles a Hollywood star. Are these events related? Are they important? When Yorkshire is threatened, you bet they are!

Gordon is compelled to solve his own problems. His homeless layabout friend (and local ladies’ man), Mick, might as well help him. Ernest, who isn’t his friend at all, wishes he wasn’t helping. Together, maybe they can untangle this most heinous web, work out what is really happening to their beloved home and save Yorkshire…because the world just wouldn’t be as great without it!

EPISODE TWO – STONED

Nether-Staining was once a peaceful farming community. Suspicion now reigns and the villagers are determined to protect their little slice of paradise from those who would seek to do harm, especially if that harm involves merging their beloved county of Yorkshire with neighbouring Lancashire.

Simple folk react to such news in odd ways. The simplest of folk decide to build a dry stone wall around the whole county, even if it means someone might spot them and they lose their disability benefits! Never underestimate the power of such folk, especially in large groups.

This new threat to Yorkshire could be beyond the ordinarily heroic residents. But is all what it seems? Who is friend and who is foe? Even Gordon and Mick might not be able to deal with it, and they have experience and dubious quality super-outfits to call upon.

It’s time to journey into a new age-spanning adventure, from the War of the Roses to modern day, because while some things may be forgiven, they are never truly forgotten.

EPISODE THREE – PICKLED

Nether-Staining has found peace. The aliens who tried to take over the majestic little pocket of the Yorkshire Dales are now friends and honorary Yorkshire-folk. All is well. Alcohol isn’t available in outer space and these new visitors to mighty Yorkshire seem to delight in nothing more than drinking the beer in the Dog & Duck. Well, you just can’t beat a Priest’s Hole, can you? When life is this good, what’s the point in leaving the pub?

Except just as all is well, all is actually not well. Trying to make sure it ends well might be a challenge.

A most unusual thing is about to happen in Nether-Staining. Local Casanova and homeless wastrel, Mick Hunt, wants to settle down with the right lady and when something so incredible occurs, you just know that hell is about to break loose.

Join Gordon and Mick once more as they endeavour to combat what might be the greatest threat to their beloved slice of Yorkshire since time began…and it may not end in death, because some fates are far worse…

EPISODE FOUR – BLASPHEMY

Nether-Staining has a big problem. There is a surplus of housing, a common problem following a zombie apocalypse.

As if that wasn’t bad enough, Hippo Man’s super-outfit has got too big – due to his having lost the ‘morbid’ tag from his obesity – and it has been officially destroyed. Retirement looms.

Strangers are moving into the village, and in Yorkshire, that means suspicion and distrust…and an odd desire to have a good stare.

But as the villagers begrudgingly begin to adjust to the newcomers, all is – as we’ve come to expect in this neck of the woods – not what it seems.

Strange things are happening to random folk and the village is about to face challenges never seen in history before; and near-constant rain, not dissimilar to that typically seen in Lancashire, is just the beginning. This time, Nether-Staining might have bitten off more than it can chew, but just maybe there is hope, because Blue Boy is still present and correct, and manfully straining against his Lycra.

Thank You and Please

Hi readers!

Just a short note to say thanks for anyone who downloaded “Baabaric“, “Stoned” or “Pickled” in my recent giveaway. Your support is appreciated. Welcome to Nether-Staining.

I should also like to ask if you could please leave a constructive review once you’ve read them. It really helps out newer writers.

And if you missed them, fear not, they don’t cost too much at full price so please click on the individual titles above and go from there.

Thank you and have a great Christmas!

Time to Commit “Blasphemy”!!!

Hi readers!

It is that time! I am pleased to tell you all that “Blasphemy“, episode four in the increasingly crazy Annals of Nether-Staining, is now available to order in both Kindle and Paperback formats…just in time for Christmas.

Please click on the title of the book or just HERE to learn more.

If you love comedy, sci-fi, religion, God or even not God…give it a go…but I suggest starting with “Baabaric” and working forwards.

And if you order it, I give you my thanks, it means a lot.

FREE BOOKS – ENDS TODAY!

Hello!

If you’ve not scored your FREE e-book(s) yet, just in time for Christmas, today is your last chance.

To celebrate the launch of “Blasphemy” tomorrow (13th), the first three episodes in the Annals of Nether-Staining remain FREE until the end of 12th December (USPT)…so now is your chance…click on the titles to learn more and for links to your local Amazon Kindle store…

“Baabaric” – episode 1

“Stoned” – episode 2

“Pickled” – episode 3

Enjoy Christmas in Yorkshire everyone!