Scott Perry's Blog, page 37

With and For

Difference-makers are generous disruptors.

Sure everything is fine just as it is. And, yet...

...things could be better.

And the way we make things better is together, to commit to a common cause and each other. Meaningful change for the better is an endeavor we do with and for each other.

Change that enhance the prospects and prosperity of a community are co-created. These efforts require connection, communication, collaboration, compassion, and creativity.

Are you a difference-maker? If so, who are you co-creating with in the difference you're making? What change are you seeking to make? How are you leveraging the power of community to make that change happen?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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What I've Been Reading - Spring 2021

This article contains affiliate links. At no extra cost to you, if you make a purchase, Creative On Purpose receives a commission. Thank you!

Books are efficient and cost effective learning tools. They are my go-to source for inspiration and information in my endeavors. Here are four books that currently inform my journey in developing Creative On Purpose.

Get Together: How to Build a Community with Your People, by Bailey Richardson, Kevin Huynh, and Kai Elmer Sotto

A practical and passionate guide to creating communities that last in-person and online. Highlighted with real world examples that demonstrate how common cause builds lasting connection.

Belong: Find Your People, Create Community & Live a More Connected Life, by Radha Agrawal

A guide for untangling "community confusion" and cultivating connections that promote all members' sense of thriving and fulfillment.

Brains on Fire: Igniting Powerful Sustainable Word of Mouth Movements, Robbin Phillips, Greg Cordell, Geno Church, Spike Jones

An easy to understand and execute blueprint for avoiding weak transactional bonds and creating lasting brand movements.

Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life, Richard Rohr

A beautifully articulated look at how to reframe elderhood as a time for growth, deeper connection, and service.

These four books, more than any other of the dozens I've recently read, have had the biggest impact on my journey in building the Creative On Purpose brand and developing and delivering on its promise to help others fly higher in endeavors that make a difference. You can find them and other helpful resources in the Creative On Purpose Bookstore.

Let's keep flying higher together!

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose. 

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People are fascinating...

The world is full of people who malign, disparage, frustrate and ignore you. How do you handle that?

I’ve put up with a fair number of *ssholes in my time. Whiners, posers, liars, and assorted other bad actors are a daily diet in all of our life’s endeavors.

I used to really let these knuckleheads get under my skin. I’d ruminate (and perseverate) about their stupidity, discourteousness, and lack of self-awareness. I’d spin endless cycles playing and replaying (and fantasizing) how I might deliver them their just deserts.

And then, one day, I revisited a favorite quote.

Marcus Aurelius, the closest the western world ever came to the Platonic ideal of a “philosopher king,” would say this before getting out of bed each morning.

“Say to yourself first thing in the morning: today I shall meet people who are meddling, ungrateful, aggressive, treacherous, malicious, unsocial. All this has afflicted them through their ignorance of true good and evil.”

Upon further reflection, I believe everyone is doing the best they can and what they think they need to do most of the time. The science shows that 80% of our daily activities are executed unconsciously. We react to stimuli without much thought about our motivation or the impact of what we say and do.

How many times have you found yourself on the receiving end of being misinterpreted or misunderstood? Did you respond with outrage, frustration, or a self-pity party?

We often demand that we be extended the benefit of the doubt but are unwilling to extend the same to others. I know I've been guilty of this more often than I care to admit.

A mantra I’ve adopted to insert a pause when I catch myself about to hastily react to a perceived affront is to say, “People are fascinating...”

It helps because it’s true. People are fascinating. They are, and so are you. Each of us is complicated and conflicted–capable of heroism and villainy, kindness and cruelty, selflessness and selfishness. None of us is an absolute saint or outright sinner.

Accepting this complexity creates space to hold ourselves and each other with a bit more compassion and grace. Holding this tension opens the door for a healthier response rather than an unhelpful reaction. On the other side of that threshold lies equanimity, understanding, and a better way forward.

What might the world be like if each of us tried to assume no malicious intent in others more often?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Why do you do what you do?

Do you ever wonder if you could show up more fully in your life and make a bigger difference?

Me too.

The fear of dying with the difference only I can make still inside became very real to me when I nearly got run over while jogging across a crosswalk during my daily run to the cemetery and back.

It was then that I decided that if I didn't want to end up in the cemetery, it'd be better if I drove to it, ran there.

My daily cemetery run is a meditation about making a bigger difference with whatever time I have left. This practice helped me craft the idea that better living is achieved through endeavors that matter. Building identity and forging meaning comes when you decide to live your legacy.

It wasn't until I began sharing my story that my work began to connect and earn the enrollment that helps make change happen for those I seek to serve. People don't invest in the features and benefits of your offer. They buy into the transformation you promise.

Are you selling stuff and services, or a better way of being and becoming in the marketing stories you're sharing? Want to make a real connection with those who need to engage with what you do to enhance their lives? Start telling stories that speak to their challenges and aspirations. Craft stories that connect through empathy, emotion, dreams, and desires. Share a narrative about where you're going and why we should follow you now.

Choose your story, choose your future.

Work that matters begins with a story worth telling. Tell me a story...

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Be the thermostat...

Equanimity is one of my favorite words.

First of all, it's fun to say. Seriously. Say it aloud several times. It's a word that ping-pongs around your mouth like a pinball. It starts with hitting the back of your mouth, careens to the roof, and bounces off your closed lips back to the top before you spit out the final syllable. Try it. See? Wasn't that fun?!

Equanimity shouldn't be conflated with the modern usage of apathy. However, in Stoic philosophy, apatheia (from the Greek: a- "without" and pathos "suffering"), apathy refers to a state of mind that is not disturbed by harmful desires or passions. In ancient usage, apathy was equanimity.

Equanimity is my preferred way of being. It doesn't invite the dull laziness of tranquility, nor does it burn out quickly like the ardor of happiness. It just hums with even, calm energy that's sustainable and pleasant. Equanimity is a virtue that encourages strength and volition. Equanimity is one of a difference-maker's most powerful tools.

To practice equanimity is to not be dragged about by your passions or attachments. Detachment from unhealthy narratives about your past or desires about the future allows you to be present in the here and now and do the work you need to do with integrity and intention.

At the same time, equanimity doesn't preclude enjoying and even celebrating life's small accomplishments and achievements. By all means, revel a moment in your victories, big and small; just don't let Fate's fickle finger pointing in your favor for a moment go to your head.

While equanimity is easy to articulate, it is hard to practice. Most virtues are easier to talk than walk.

As I move through my day, I remind myself, "Be the thermostat, not the thermometer." Thermometers react to their surroundings. Thermostats read and regulate their environment. Thermostats embody equanimity.

How might you be a bit less like a thermometer and a bit more like a thermostat today?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Origin Story

Origin stories are often told as if they were well-planned road trips. The truth is, most meaningful endeavors are born of chaos, confusion, challenge, or crisis.

The epiphany that ended my odyssey to define what and who Creative on Purpose is for came thanks to a misstep that almost ended my life. 

I hope your moment of realization was (or will be) less dramatic. 

Regardless, any enterprise’s value has little to do with how it begins (or ends, for that matter). The significance of your venture lies in the generosity of your intentions and the quality of your efforts. 

Living your legacy by flying higher in the difference only you can make isn’t for everyone. Defining, developing, and delivering your promise and stepping into your potential doesn’t come with any guarantees. The reward lies not within the call to adventure nor in your return but in the journey itself. 

Sure, take a moment to remember and celebrate how your undertaking began. But then reflect on these questions. What’s going on in your project now? Where are you heading next? When do you take the next step? Who can you invite to come along? Why does it matter?

Scott

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Second Act

It's frequently called a second act. In his book on the subject, David Brooks named it in the title, The Second Mountain. Fr. Richard Rohr calls it "the second half of life" in Falling Upward.

Whatever you call it, some of us at some point decide to move from making a living to living a legacy.

Work is how human beings build identity. We think we are what we do. In a quest to define and develop ourselves, many of us follow the herd and chase status and stuff. If we're lucky, we may also forge some meaning for our lives through our job or career. If not, sometimes we find it in relationships or recreation.

Too often, we identify solely with where we got and what we have. Many never even consider a second act, mountain, or half.

It often takes an unexpected or even unfair failure or fall for someone to turn away from working for selfish pursuits and instead turn toward serving others. In the process, we discover that we're not just what we do for a living but also our values and virtue.

A second act helps us shed our attachment to prestige and prosperity and instead aspire to contribute to others. A more enlightened view of ourselves emerges. We realize that we enhance our own lives most through efforts that elevate others.

Here's the thing, a second act doesn't have to begin when we're ready to retire from what we do as our livelihood. You can choose to start to craft a contribution at any age, and you don't have to do it after or at the expense of what you do to make a living.

A life of contribution, service, and making things better begins whenever you decide to do so. Is now the right time for you to start or begin to level up in your second act?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Are you doing the wrong thing?

It took me almost three years to unpack what and who Creative on Purpose was for. That's a long time to spend alone in the desert seeking insight.

While engaged in this walkabout (or was it a coddiwomple?), I developed tools for maintaining my commitment to my endeavor while protecting my sanity and stamina. One was to check-in with myself and ask, "Is what I'm doing now energizing me or exhausting me?"

 

This question was an internal zest barometer.

 

Of course, all worthwhile work includes periods of physical, psychological, and spiritual impoverishment and invigoration. But a consistent and sustained season of fatigue is worth naming and paying attention to.

 

How do you check in with your enthusiasm or enmity for what you're working on?

 

I began to get pretty good at quickly quitting things that depleted me. Maybe too good.

 

Having circled back to a hastily dropped plan or project more than once only to find there actually is a there there, I now insert a pause to rethink my approach before quitting a plan or project. This helps me check myself and not mistake a dip for a sunk cost.

 

When I'm experiencing fatigue or frustration, I ask myself, "Am I doing the wrong thing, or am I doing the thing wrong?"

 

Overreaching, overthinking, overcommitting, or multitasking often turn out to be the actual source of my tiredness. Pausing, zooming out, and asking for help assist me in regaining the focus, boldness, and discipline I need to find and take the next best small step.

 

I can then rethink, recalibrate, and recommit to doing the thing better.

 

What are you experiencing in your journey to discover, develop, or deliver your enterprise? Is what you're doing day-to-day energizing or exhausting you? If the latter, add this question to your zest barometer, "Am I doing the wrong thing, or am I doing the thing wrong?"

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Which comes first, purpose or passion?

Which comes first, purpose or passion?

The short answer is, "Yes, and..."

If you're like me, you were brought up to believe that purpose and passion are to be found within us or through work you're born to do.

What a crock.

Scientific surveys indicate that only about 20% of those asked can identify either their purpose or passion. The fable of finding and then following your bliss, therefore, is most often an invitation to shame and suffering for many. 

My journey has taught me that purpose and passion aren't innate qualities or ordained destinations. They're skills learned and honed through practice. Approaching the work or the person in front of you with purpose or passion begets more of both.

I became a professional musician because I had a passion for playing music. At first, I took the gigs that were offered or readily available. Over time, my passion waned. Most of the gigs I played were a grind–long sets for disinterested audiences and dismissive venue owners.

What to do?

I started booking myself on purpose. I listed the venues and festivals I wanted to play. I increased my fees so I could afford to play fewer and better gigs. I even wrote down all of my musical heroes I wanted to share the stage with.

I then strategically approached getting the gigs I wanted at the fees I needed and performed with musicians who shared my love for the music and craft of performing for others. I ended up playing almost every festival and venue on my list and met and performed with most of my living musical heroes.

Instead of continuing to mine passion and hope for the best, I brought in purpose and this cultivated more passion and purpose.

When I dialed back my performing career to spend more time with my family, I opened a music store to make a living and stay off the road. Although the store earned a modest livelihood, I decided to start giving lessons in the back to increase my earnings. 

Funny thing, when I opened the store, I didn't want to give lessons even though many customers asked me to teach them. Within months of opening a guitar studio in the back of the store, I realized I had found a new and entirely unexpected passion. I closed the retail operation and became a full-time guitar teacher.

I started with purpose, and it led me to a passion. I continued to employ both and made an excellent living doing work I enjoyed with and for people I loved.

The big magic, however, happens when you bring purpose and passion into your endeavors together.

I spent several years lost in the wilderness in my effort to build Creative on Purpose into a viable and sustainable enterprise. However, I knew my purpose was to help others live more fulfilling lives doing meaningful work. I also followed my passion for connecting through blogging and broadcasting and creating community with intention and integrity.

Instead of treating passion and purpose like finite resources that could be mined to extinction, I employed them as renewable resources that could sustainably fuel forward progress. Bringing purpose and passion to bear in all of my endeavors generates greater clarity, cultivates deeper commitment, and emboldens disciplined action.

What's your relationship with purpose and passion? Do you have more of one than the other? What happens if you start to bring more of both into every relationship and routine in your day-to-day?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Learning to Unlearn

People like us, who seek to make a difference through work that matters, love to learn. We buy books, attend talks, enroll in online courses, and scour the internet for know-how. But is that really learning?

It sure feels like it. All of these activities remind us of how we were schooled and schooling is learning. Right?

"Being good at school is not the same as learning something."–Seth Godin

Schooling is not learning. Like the activities listed above, schooling is information delivery. What sets schooling apart is that it's based on compliance, conformity, and competition.

How much of your schooling do you employ in your current day-to-day endeavors? Probably not enough to justify the investment of all the irretrievable time and attention. But I bet the mindset and posture informed by all that compliance, conformity, and competition-based schooling shows up in how you show up.

It's time to unlearn that sh*t. It's time to relearn how we really learn.

 "Learning that does not lead to action is useless."–Epictetus

Schooling delivers information and education supplies knowledge but learning happens by doing. Learning in action makes change happen. Learning worth the work employs curiosity, consideration, creativity, courage, and cooperation.

Empathy, enrollment, and effort are also required to make worthwhile change happen. Leaning into meaningful learning and outcomes must employ these practices as well.

Learning is earned through experience over time and cultivates the virtues of patience, humility, and acceptance which encourage resilience and lead to real understanding and wisdom.

So, is it time to read another book, watch another talk, take another course, or surf the web or is it time to do the work and learn as you go?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose. 

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