Scott Perry's Blog, page 36

Is time on your side?

Time, like most things, is a construct. It's simply a story.

There's no agreement amongst physicists or philosophers about whether or not time is a fundamental absolute. Even amongst those who argue that time exists, there's wide disagreement about what it is and is not.

The ancient Greeks held space for different types of time. The most frequently referenced are Chronos (chronological time) and Kairos (the significance of a moment). Put simply, Chronos is quantitative, and Kairos is qualitative.

As difference-makers, both types of time are essential. Each informs and inspires the story we are living through our endeavors. Quantitative time allows for planning and doing. Qualitative time provides for insight and inspiration.

Another frame might be that although change happens over time, the ramifications of that change can be revealed in a single moment.

Chronological time can lull the aspiring difference-maker into a false sense of stability. Days pass, each looking more or less like the one that came before. We can be seduced by the sufficiency of the status quo. This can make it hard to recognize a propitious moment.

It often takes a critical moment to wake us up from the stupor of Chronos to the insight of Kairos. The ancient Greeks had a name for this also, Krisis.

The inherent contradictions and confusion within a crisis can wake us up to the opportunity for an epiphany (another ancient Greek term related to time). In a moment of epiphany, something is suddenly revealed with luminous clarity.

Yes, time is a story, and the stories we tell about time are powerful tools. The thing about tools is they can be used by us or on us (and frequently, both are going on at the same time).

So, is time using you, or are you using time?Rather than wait for a crisis, how can you encourage a moment of epiphany that creates possibility?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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The stories we tell...

Trauma can break a person. It can also break you open to possibility. It took such a moment for me to realize that I was complicit in creating my own suffering. Negative narratives I crafted about myself, my experiences, and how I measured up (or more often didn't), to those around me fueled my frustration, anger, and bitterness.

Choose your story, choose your future. Why do so many of us choose stories that block or harm us?

We grow deeply attached even to the most unhealthy stories we tell ourselves. Familiarity doesn't always breed contempt. More often it cultivates complacency and even comfort. We stop seeking to develop our potential and deliver on our promise because not only might it not work out, we may end up worse off.

Far too often we doubt our own worthiness. We dare not ask for, nor strive for better. We allow our imposter to keep us humiliated and hiding. We go along with the herd and the status quo. We stop ourselves from acting "as if" by cycling on frightening tales about "what if."

We can develop a pathological delight in our unhappiness. There's seductive deliciousness to despair. Sometimes we find solace in settling for lack.

And yet...

The reason we suffer is because our inner wisdom knows better. We are boundless. We are capable of so much more and better than we can even imagine. That wee small voice does not give up. Its whispered words of aspiration and encouragement persist.

Why are you ignoring that wee small voice? Why are you letting your inner critic bully and berate it? Why are you not heeding its call to step into and stay in your power. Why do you not engage your authority to be the agent of your destiny?

Now is the time. The time is now. Rise. Stand up to be seen and speak up to be heard. It all begins with just one small step into a better possibility.

Choose your story, choose your future.

Who do you wish to become? Tell us. Inspire us, invite us, help us help you, and lead us toward better. We need you to share your story.

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.

Inverting the Golden Rule

You're engaged in work that matters. You're making a difference. That kind of endeavor is always done with and for others, and therefore, it is a fraught enterprise.

I spend a lot of my time in a leadership role within various online communities. Each has lengthy community guidelines and terms of service that can be boiled down to one essential principle, obey the Golden Rule, "Treat others the way you want them to treat you."

It should be simple, right? Turns out it's not. Why? Because people are fascinating, and the most fascinating person is the one who stares back at you in the mirror.

You are, of course, generous, kind, and empathetic in your interactions with others. I am too. And yet...

Suppose I were to crawl into your head and listen to your internal dialogue. I'm guessing that the conversation I'd hear is not nearly as considerate and compassionate toward yourself as the conversation you have with others.

Why is that?

My guess is the answer is deeply rooted in biological and evolutionary processes tied to safety and belonging. Shame and blame are powerful levers for enforcing social order. This dynamic will never be fully undone. However, our sense of worthiness and ability to lean into our potential requires that we do something.

Maybe it's time to invert the golden rule? Perhaps we need to replace "Treat others the way you want them to treat you" with "Treat yourself the way you treat others?"

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Do stories really matter?

Do stories really matter?

The question is, of course, rhetorical. If you want to make a difference, you have to tell stories. And if you're going to make a bigger difference, chances are you need to tell better stories.

Having a great idea or a cause worth investing in is not enough. If you can't craft a compelling narrative that connects with the right people and a common purpose, no one will pay attention. Stories need to inspire before listeners will lean in and take a leap with you.

Remember that scene in the movie, Jerry McGuire, where Jerry, filled with righteous indignation, tries to rally others to join him in leaving the agency to start a new one, and no one follows? Ever had one of your stories land that badly? I know I have (and more often than I'd care to share).

Compare Jerry's speech with the resolute determination in Michelle Obama's call to young women to step into their power. What sets these two stories apart?

A compelling story can start as one about you. Still, it must also resonate with whomever you're sharing it with and create the generous tension that encourages them to step into possibility with you. No one wants to be told what to do. Stories that connect and enjoin others are about shared dreams and desires. We all want to be engaged participants in co-creating a better future.

Telling stories that connect and inspire action is a skill you can get better at through practice. Developing storytelling craft is enhanced and expedited when you have a process you can trust and trust yourself enough to invest time and attention to practice that process.

Ready to make a bigger difference by learning to tell better stories? Tell us your story early and often!

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Rethinking Authority

For good reason, many are questioning authority these days. For far too long, authority has been unfairly and unjustly distributed.

We should, and we must, cease this historical pattern and work together to extend privilege and opportunity to everyone, starting with those from whom it has been withheld.

But how?

Maybe it starts by rethinking our authority stories.

The root word of authority is author. An author is a storyteller, someone who crafts a narrative worth sharing. Authors are powerful. When their tales take hold, they can influence destiny.

And we are all authors of the stories we tell others and ourselves.

All of us can weave tales that change the way we think about our institutions, systems, the culture, and each other. But perhaps the most potent narratives are autobiographical.

Choose your story, choose your future.

Authors get to decide what goes in their stories and, much more important, what does not go in their stories.

Self-narratives that promote our health and happiness are tales about emergence. The hero's journey is one of becoming. The hero embraces uncertainty, navigates adversity, and understands that failure is a necessary and valuable part of the process.

These adventures begin with committing to take the first step and follow it with the next. As the author of your story, you must own uncertainty and your insecurity. You must decide to replace "what if?" with "as if." Every doubt and difficulty must be followed by "and..." to create opportunity and possibility.

What if you started being the author of your story? What if you committed to being the agent of your destiny? How might that change things?

Life only happens to you if you let it. Life can happen through you. Are you ready to be the author of your destiny?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.

The Best Teacher Ever

Imposter syndrome is getting a lot of attention these days. There's all kinds of advice on social media, blogs, and podcasts about how to beat it. Some even claim to have the secret to quitting or killing imposter syndrome.

I call "bullsh*t."

For the uninitiated, imposter syndrome is the feeling that, despite your accomplishments or abilities, you're really just a poser and pretender. It's the fear, experienced most energetically by high achievers, that being exposed as a fraud is imminent and will be devastating.

Imposter syndrome can manifest as perfectionism, workaholism, excelling without effort, being a lone wolf, or insufficiency. It's usually accompanied by anxiety, stress, rumination, or depression.

Any of this resonate? Sounds pretty bad, doesn't it? Well, it's not. The imposter is actually a very cleverly disguised teacher. Perhaps the best you'll ever know.

What the hell am I talking about? Hear me out.

"Who am I to stand up, speak up, or strive?" These are the essential arguments of the imposter. Imposter syndrome is trying to fulfill our existential need to belong by undermining our sense of worthiness. 

While this impulse helped human beings stay alive and survive in the past, it no longer serves us. Yet, because it is informed by evolution and inspired by biology, the imposter is not going anywhere.

What to do? Invert the relationship.

The imposter doesn't show up when you're humiliated and hiding. It only starts shouting when you're leaning into or leveling up in a worthwhile endeavor. The imposter is a compass helping affirm you're heading in a direction worth pursuing and that you have some work to do about your feelings of worthiness and belonging.

Reflecting on your imposter is an exercise in acceptance, humility, patience, and resilience and an invitation to rethink your internal narrative. 

What's your imposter telling you? What if you embraced it and invited it to play instead of trying to conquer it? How can your imposter be your guide?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

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Thought Leadership

It seems to me that being a thought leader requires just two things, a thought and a willingness to lead.

But is that really enough?

There appear to be more than enough people in the world sharing their thoughts. What is less clear is how much leadership is actually happening.

Leadership is the ability to lead. Leading is a verb. To lead is to guide a community in an activity that advances a cause.

Thoughts are all well and good. By all means, develop ideas worth sharing and share them. But leading others in endeavors that make a difference requires a commitment to stand up and be seen, speak up and be heard, and then do what must be done to make worthwhile change happen.

That probably means doing more than sharing your thoughts in your blog or on social media. Actually, that definitely means doing more than sharing your ideas in your blog or on social media.

Thought leadership requires you do the work and do it with and for others with compassion, consideration, courage, and commitment. 

We can't follow your lead if we don't find you engaged in creative leadership.

Where are you showing up to do the real work of thought leadership?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.

The Virtues of Anger

Anger is a many-splendored thing. Most often, we see it as dangerous and harmful–something to be curbed and avoided. I disagree (mostly).

Sure, cultivating and acting upon unhealthy and irrational anger is not a path to happiness or equanimity. At the same time, our prehistoric brain (the amygdala) is designed to trigger us into fight mode when we feel threatened, even if our fear is imagined.

What's more, because we're fond of surrounding ourselves with people who believe what we believe, this anger is often amplified into a delusional rage of righteousness. These convictions become rigid certainties and absolute value judgments. In turn, these opinions are used to justify attacks that are as destructive to ourselves as they are to our perceived enemy.

While there's not much you can do to avoid the reactive anger of the prehistoric part of the brain, you don't have to cling to this emotion and let it take you on its joyless ride. You can insert a pause after this initial flare-up and bring your younger and wiser discerning brain (the prefrontal cortex) into the conversation.

Where the amygdala reacts with judgments, the prefrontal cortex responds with judgment. Engaging this more thoughtful part of your grey matter brings in the curiosity and consideration that cultivates empathy and a healthier and more creative approach to a situation.

Here's the thing though, sometimes our anger is justified. There is injustice in the world, and when we collide with it, we should get angry, and we should act upon it. This compassionate, righteous anger is very different from the deluded rage of righteousness discussed above. It's measured, clear, and directed at making things better.

How can you tell the difference between harmful blind rage and helpful discerning anger? Maybe it begins with asking the question, "Is my anger using me, or am I using it?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.

Leading begins with believing.

Let’s start with clarifying terms...

By leadership, I do not mean authority. Transformational leadership does not depend on position. It’s a posture available to anyone who cares enough to commit to making things better through an endeavor that serves others.

And by believing, I do not mean blind faith in ideas or identities that can’t be proven utterly absolute. Our beliefs are often convictions–assertions we hold to be valid until they collide with and are improved by better claims.

Neither leadership nor belief is improved through argument or compliance. The most outstanding leaders are not the loudest nor proudest. They possess quiet resolve and practice thoughtful consideration. Similarly, many of the most influential beliefs are neither the simplest nor most popular. They are adopted slowly through long and practiced experience.

Now let's weave in the importance and value of an endeavor...

Human beings find meaning and purpose through their work. And it’s the efforts we undertake with and for others to elevate everyone’s prospects and prosperity that cultivate significance and build identity. We enhance ourselves through these higher callings that serve others.

Being a difference-maker begins with choosing to pursue a cause that benefits a community with courage and conviction. This kind of leadership requires belief. First, you must believe in and lead yourself. This encourages the self-trust that encourages others to trust you and themselves and join in collaborative efforts.

“All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.”–Martin Luther King Jr.

So, what’s the cause you believe in and want to lead us toward? Do you believe in yourself enough to trust yourself to lead us? Where are you showing up fully and with conviction where we can be inspired to join you and work together to make things better?

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.

A Lever and a Place to Stand

"Give me a lever long enough and a place to stand and I will move the earth."–Archimedes

Making your mark in the world or a dent in the universe might feel impossible. I'd assert otherwise. Everyone one of us has the potential to make a difference. 

But how?

I'd argue that it begins with commitment. Commitment to do the work, live your legacy and serve others. This is the real work of engaging with and for others to make things better.

Archimedes' quote is a simple formula to begin executing an influence on nudging the status quo in a better direction. Of course, simple isn't easy, but it gets easier with practice.

What's your lever? What talent, skill, or experience could you share to enhance the lives of others?

Where do you stand? What's your vision, mission, or cause that you will not equivocate on or move away from?

What's your fulcrum? What are the guiding principles, values, and virtues that provide leverage when you stand up to be seen, speak up to be heard and throw your full weight and power upon the lever?

What are you trying to move? Where are you trying to exert influence, exact impact, or create a shift? Who can you convene to help lean into your lever?

You are more powerful than you can ever imagine. All it takes is the willingness to embrace and engage your agency to choose a target, a lever, a place to stand, and lean all in and full out on your side of the fulcrum.

Ready? Go.

Scott Perry, Difference-Maker Coach at Creative on Purpose.

If what you just read resonated, please share it with a friend.