Brenda Knowles's Blog: Space2live, page 22

Feel to Heal: Activating Our Safety System

My therapist said something that stuck with me. She said we need felt experiences that change how we felt before. We need such experiences to heal and grow. She said words will not do it. They touch only on an intellectual level. Intellectual is just the surface. Our core needs for nurturing, growth and connection run […]

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Maturity Equals Courage + Consideration

One of the deepest, most important messages in, The Quiet Rise of Introverts, is that maturity is a combination of courage to be authentic and consideration of others. To me, the quiet rise involves moving from a state of insecurity and inauthenticity to a state of security and interdependence. I focus on making this progression as an […]

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Is Efficiency Ruining Our Ability to Love, Learn and Enjoy?

Like most people, I’ve adopted a level of efficiency as a survival mechanism. With three kids, a home, a career, a partner and friends, I strive for effectiveness so I can keep going without getting buried under it all. I eat leftovers, put things back where I found them, have a system for ordering groceries, […]

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How Losing Our Joy Affects Our Children: Ways to Get Back to Good

  Because my happiness was based on external measures—on tasks being completed, plans running accordingly, goals being met, hairs being in place—I was continually disappointed … upset … impatient … and stressed. In the process of making my own life miserable, I’d funneled my unhappiness straight into my daughter’s once joyful heart and spirit. Her […]

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When Time is Fragmented, Introverts Stress Out

I have a client who thrives while moving from one task to the other, often without planning or time in between jobs. He likes having different jobs thrown at him at different times. He rolls with the changes and the barrage of details to be handled. His wife feels different about such juggling and pivoting. […]

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Finding Our Way Through Orientation People and Compass Points

I recently walked with a friend who lost her husband two years ago. She said after he died she was lost. She didn’t eat, didn’t want to do anything. She had to force herself to get up and out of the house each day. Now a good portion of this experience was grief, but there […]

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Social Anxiety and Building Our Resilience

A few years ago, I started noticing a slight hesitancy to sign my name on a credit card tablet in front of the store clerk. I also noticed that if I suddenly become the center of attention during a group conversation, I blush and feel hot, sometimes forgetting where I am going with my story. […]

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Finding and Losing Emotional Connection Again and Again

  “…love is a continual process of seeking and losing emotional connection, and reaching out to find it again. The bond of love is a living thing. If we don’t attend to it, it naturally begins to wither.” — Dr. Sue Johnson, Hold Me Tight In our world of endless distractions and to do lists, it […]

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