Pamela Schloesser Canepa's Blog, page 51
June 15, 2019
Weekend Coffee Share. Summer Goals!
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Welcome to my Weekend Coffee Share, hosted by Allison at Eclectic Ali. This is the week I started my true relaxation and “detox” from stress, including occasional half-cup-of coffee days. I’m writing here and there, but I have no set deadlines this summer.
I do have goals, though. Staying healthy and not feeling stiff or pained every day are two of the biggest. The issue came up last week when my boyfriend and I went on a four hour drive to the memorial for my best friend’s husband. I get stiff just from sitting in a car for those few hours, and we came back the next afternoon.
[image error] Friends are also family.
It was an emotional visit, but this visit was also very life-affirming. I’ve known my friend since age 13. We know so much about each other and have seen each other through some really hard times. We’ve been separated many times by circumstances and distance. Her second husband recently became ill and was hospitalized at the end. He was one of the best husbands in my opinion, even though I only met him once. She loved him very much, and everything she said at the memorial just showed she was full of appreciation for her time with him and relief that his pain was over. In other words, she was not a basket case at all. Her husband, whom she has known five to six years and been married to for three, had been sick in the last two years. Near the end, he developed a rare disease, calciphylaxis, and was in the hospital for most of this last year. It breaks my heart, but in talking with her I could see that she wasn’t dwelling on the sorrow, and instead was focusing on the wonderful times they had together. I want to make sure to go and see her or spend time with her more often.
After returning, I’ve been setting a lot of appointments this week. Routine stuff, and I made it to yoga twice in one week! I felt great after yesterday’s class, but I feel sore today, so maybe I just have to get used to it. I also went and tried out a place called Stretch Zone that does assisted stretch. I decided I’d go back, so I purchased a month’s package to see how I improve after that month. “Spend all you have for loveliness,” someone said, somewhere. I used to spend it on vacations and concerts, now I am having to invest in being healthy and a whole person. In my opinion, well worth it! It’ll make my next vacation more enjoyable. I also took my furbaby to get a haircut yesterday. Yeah, he knows he’s handsome. 
June 6, 2019
Caring for Your Psyche. #amwriting #fiction
[image error]Photo by Anthony on Pexels.com
By Pamela Schloesser Canepa, (c) 2019
“We are all given a psyche. You must think of your psyche as its own living thing.”
This was an interesting class Cassie dragged me into after my divorce. The instructor was a little wacky, though. Lots of college kids were there. Were they getting college cred? I sure wasn’t. Continuing education? Hmm. Some blond, New Age hippie named Ashbury sat to my right. Much to my relief, he smelled of Irish Spring.
The instructor continued: “Imagine your psyche as a living being…and draw it. Then, label it. Your last instruction, is to start nurturing it.”
I started with paws, and a belly, then decided to step out for cigarette before finishing. I was sick of always doing what I was supposed to; it got me nowhere in my marriage except mismatched with a narcissist. Plus, I had no idea how to picture my psyche. Some air might help.
Ashbury smiled at me. “Are you stuck?”
“Yeah. Shhh, don’t tell anyone. I might be the failing student here.”
A smile spread across his face. “You can’t fail if you took the first step.” He pointed to the half-hearted drawing on my paper. “What will the rest be? I wonder.” He tapped his pencil to his forehead lightly.
“Right now, I wouldn’t care if you drew something on there. Something radical, horrible, I don’t know. I’ll be right back.”
Ten minutes later I came in , apologizing to the instructor about a stomach issue. Sitting down, I saw a baby dragon staring up at me…and Ashbury smiling at me. There was a lovely orchid on his paper. I chuckled.
“Mine looks like ‘Puffin’ McStuffins’! Well-done, Ashbury!” This man had sized me up and done my homework for me. Could I nurture Puffin in all of his adorable imperfection? You bet!
“So now you have a name, too. I think you’ll pass. How do you think we could nurture an orchid and a baby dragon together?” he asked, one eyebrow raised.
“Passion-fruit tea?” I said through a smile.
“Yes, let’s go!”
He walked out first with his drawing, and I followed moments later. The instructor just looked up at us, defeated. Or maybe he knew I was beginning the process of nurturing my psyche?
*Posted in response to the prompt at https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/06/06/rdp-thursday-nurture/
I hope you enjoyed my story. I’d love to hear your comments or your experiences with this topic!
June 1, 2019
Weekend Coffee Share. A Day Like Any Other, in a Beautiful World
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Iceland, the countryside, and me, circa 1972.
Welcome to my Weekend Coffee Share, hosted by Allison at eclecticali.wordpress.com
This is the post in which I celebrate, or bemoan in a humorous attempt, the addition of another candle on my birthday cake. I am now not as old as dirt, but officially older than dirt. 
May 27, 2019
Weekend Coffee Share. Out of my Head, and onto the Page.
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Welcome to my Weekend Coffee Share, hosted by Allison at eclecticali.wordpress.com
What a lovely weekend it is! Here in the southeast U.S., it will be close to 100 degrees today! I took Bixby to the dog park Saturday, and we could not even last an hour.
There were plenty of dogs, and he loved that, but they all where panting heavily in no time in that heat. At least he drank a lot of water! The dog park is always a treat for me as well; I love to watch dogs play.
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I am approaching my birthday this coming week. It makes me look back and ponder my life and choices while appreciating all that has been given me. I have been blessed in so many ways.
This throwback photo is of me in April, 1996, either a week before or the day before I gave birth to my son. All of this talk of women’s reproductive rights gets me thinking. My son was certainly planned and wanted. For those who had a child that was not planned, I honor you as well. No two experiences with motherhood are the same. How different could the pregnancy experience be for someone who is raped or does not have access to birth control? We do not need to move backward with women’s rights, or the rights of any other sort of person! I suppose I’ll be accused of being political. Posting certain things on my Facebook can lead to arguments from some of my staunchly GOP friends. I have some in my family, too. I love them no matter what and try to disagree amicably.
All of this reflection has led to me setting up a separate Facebook to share some poems and past journal entries about my experiences as a woman. Oddly, if I try to boost any of those posts or the page, FB wants an extra authentication process, meaning I will likely be put on a list somewhere. I feel so important now! I am tired of holding my tongue just because I am a girl, and I have never picketed for women’s rights. I am a firm believer that the pen is mightier than the sword. Would you like to see some of what I share there?
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As part of this whole process, I have considered writing some books under a pen name, and do not always feel comfortable sharing certain things under my own name that involve subverting the paradigm or opening eyes to my point of view, so I’d be glad to have some more followers there who would like to get my point of view or may identify with it. The Facebook site is https://www.facebook.com/prianafolk
My most recent post was a poem entitled “Sorry,” which is all about the way many of us have been raised to be sorry for so many things, when we just needed to express our emotions or we didn’t want a hug from Dad’s scary old man friend. You know, taught to be sorry when we didn’t live up to others’ expectations of how we should behave as a girl.
I do think this may lead into a book someday, but I have no other details. I am still working on my WIP, Malachi, and I am considering a summer trip to the place which is the setting of this book. Of course, this means I need to get to planning, and I am so behind on that. I can do this!
[image error] Why was she always so sorry? (Image via Pixabay).
Thank you for stopping by for my Weekend Coffee Share! I know I have mostly been sharing about what’s going on in my head, but hey, I am doing something about it, because my thoughts don’t eat me up anymore. Have a great week!
May 21, 2019
Where were you on 9/11/01? #amwriting #timeline #fiction #setting
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I know this is not timely, but I have come to a point in my current work in progress where the character is living in D.C. around the early 2000s, and it is impossible for me to skirt around this subject. However, it is not an easy subject. Still, let’s face the fact that 9-11 changed or totally upset all of our lives. I have an idea how I will incorporate it based on what I know. Even though I have lived in Jacksonville, Florida for forty some years, I was affected by the events of 9-11.
Where was I? I was at school, getting ready to teach my seventh grade class. Students were filtering in, as class started at 9:15. There were always a few students who would be late. One girl, a highly emotional girl on any given day, said “Ms. Canepa, an airplane crashed into the World Trade Center. It’s terrorism. We’re all gonna die!”
I told her, “No. We are not all gonna die. Please calm down. If it was terrorism, they will stop it. If we were in danger, we would have been warned by now.” It’s sounds sort of heartless, but I felt vulnerable and worried about my son who was in kindergarten, as well as sortvof surorised that I heard it first from a student. Would something else be targeted next? Evidently this news was all over the radio, because I heard it from a few other people in the next few hours. At lunch, the TV news was on in our teacher’s lounge. Everyone’s faces were grave. Students were getting checked out early all day. I texted by ex-husband who worked on a military base, wondering if they had beefed up their security. He asked about our son. Inevitably, I checked out my son a little early from his school as well. Although Smart phones were not as popular back then, people undoubtedly were getting footage, it was shared on the internet, and every TV station had constant updates or had suspended all regular programming, because we really needed to see those images on repeat on the hour. Sarcasm intended. It was nightmarish, but even worsened when I picked up my son.
I got my son into the car and asked him how his day was. He said “I saw on TV. Two airplanes crashed into a building,” in a hushed tone, knowing it was real–life and not some high-tech movie, because either he was smart or they, of course, would not show such a movie in school. It also seemed like he realized it could have happened to any of us.
“Where did you see this on TV?” I asked, knowing the answer.
“The TV in the classroom.”
While I was livid, I held that all in and hugged my son, telling him everything would be okay. It was over. Yes, his teacher had evidently been sucked into the media frenzy and had to get every detail. Or maybe watching the news was a regular part of their morning routine? Unlikely for kindergarten, though. All I could do was focus on trying to make him feel safe with me, in our own home.
Sadly, I knew this became the day I discovered I could not shield my child from the evil in this world. It had already been played out before his eyes before I could even comfort him or explain what had happened. He still remembers it to this day, though he seems detached from whatever he had felt that day as a small five-year-old.
Straight out of my 2001 journal: “Evil just reached a hand in and put a strangle-grip on our world. And we still don’t know who did it. It leaves me with quite an insecure feeling. Reminds me of what really matters, and what doesn’t….” He became a little more emotional in the next few months, and some of his behaviors surprised me, but we dealt with it. I can not imagine what it was like for those living in New York or who had family that lived there; many lost their loved ones.
What were you doing the day 9-11 occurred?
May 18, 2019
“Patterns in our Ways.” #amwriting #shortreads
What do your behaviors say about you? Who really cares? Someone does. Humans are inclined toward making patterns, setting boundaries to their land to say what is theirs. Other humans want no less than what you have. These imaginary boundaries sometimes can be seen from outer space. They make the place look ridiculous and make humans quite predictable.
“Merv, you’re being pretty ominous. I really don’t think you want to share thi…”
“Stop second guessing me, Philbert. You always do that; you’re just as predictable as a human, just like that one in the cage over there.”
“Sorry specimen, he. Definitely needs a mate. Of course, he was always alone on Earth. Showed up at work at 7:35 after stopping by Smoothie Champ. Home at 5:30 after shopping for dinner and his next day’s lunch. What a boring fellow. No wonder he’s sweating back there. Something new has happened in his life!”
“Philbert, focus. We need a second specimen. How about that one that stops in the bodega every Weds. morning and heads to the bookstore every Thurs. night. I’ve been watching for four weeks; it seems pretty reliable. We should swoop in during our current 24 hour period. I like these patterns. It’s a good compliment to that turtle of a man back there.”
“It’s worth a try. You’ve done well, Merv. I think this will get you promoted!”
A smile cracked a million crevices in Merv’s face. It had never looked as beautiful to Philbert. He closed his eyes to memorize the patterns in the cracks. Certainly Merv would not let something like a smile repeat itself too often.
Posted in response to the daily prompt at https://ragtagcommunity.wordpress.com/2019/05/18/rdp-saturday-patterns/
May 15, 2019
OWS CYCON 2019 Online Book Event! #owscycon
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Come and see this awesome event for book lovers that showcases authors in all kinds of genres! OWS stands for Our Write Side, a group I have been part of on Facebook for a short while. CYCON, well, that should be self-explanatory… At any rate, I have joined the event and have set up an author booth that you may visit at this link: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/forums/topic/author-pamela-schloesser-canepa/
There’s even a giveaway that you can easily enter by simply sharing about it or following the authors who are giving books away. Link for Giveaway (Starts May 10): http://bit.ly/SciFiCyCon2019Giveaway
Below are some of the other entertaining events for the OWS CYCON:
Cover Wars (Start May 15): http://brackify.com/bracket/35226/OWS-CyCon-Sci-Fi-Cover-Wars
Character Battles (Start May 16): http://brackify.com/bracket/35161/OWS-CyCon-Sci-Fi-Character-Battle
Fantasy and Sci-Fi Readers Lounge group (Starts May 16): https://www.facebook.com/groups/FantasySciFiReadersLounge/
During CyCon
Feel free to visit: Top 5 Blog Hop page: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/top-5s: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/top-5s/
Greatest Gadget hop page: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/sci-fi-greatest-gadgets/
World-building Showcases page (General): https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/world-building-showcase-blog-hop/
End of the World showcase: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/world-building-showcase-blog-hop/end-of-the-world/
Sci Fi Goes Punk showcase: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/world-building-showcase-blog-hop/sci-fi-goes-punk/
Unbound to Earth showcase: https://owscycon.ourwriteside.com/world-building-showcase-blog-hop/unbound-to-earth/
I am participating in just some of yhe author events, but I’m going to pop in and check out every feature myself. Maybe I’ll see you there?!
May 13, 2019
Mother’s Day, 2019.
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Life is short. Do what you like! My new motto. Last year, Mom arranged for us to go sailing. We got a free upgrade to a catamaran. Luxurious! But she said she enjoyed the monohull we had this year even better. In talking to my mom, I also found out she wants to go skydiving someday. Imagine that! Skydiving has been on my bucket list for years, and to know it’s on hers? Wow!
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Here’s the gist of it, though: she’s ready to get to work on that bucket list, and I admire that. I won’t for a moment let it make me sad.
Instead, I’ll applaud her doing things for herself. Maybe I’ll even go skydiving with her! I’ve been putting it off, waiting for a time I thought I could deal with a broken bone.
Fact is, I’ve also been putting off that trip to Europe, waiting for a time I could deal with a long airplane flight. Is my bucket list different now? Trust me, I still plan to see the sunrise in multiple states. I’ll have to think on this. In the meantime, I plan to encourage her to do those things she’s been wanting to do.
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I am so thankful that I still have her around and that we can be close. I am also glad I was able to spend time with my son on Mother’s day!
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May 11, 2019
Weekend Coffee Share. “Life Goes On.”
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Welcome to my Weekend Coffee Share, hosted by Allison at Eclectic Ali. It has been another busy week, but I ended it with a day off for an appointment. I was getting nervous about this appointment anyway, because if something didn’t look right to them, something could possibly be wrong, so I decided I would not go back to work after it and requested a whole day of leave. Though it turned out okay, I am still glad I did. Well, I lived through the uncomfortable appointment, a re-check mammogram and ultrasound, and after long waiting periods, was told that everything is fine and I just have a little cyst. “No problem, you’re just getting older and things change.” Whatever. Thanks for the reassurance. At least I don’t have to go for any further testing, but I tell you, this also happened last year. I don’t like it, but I’ll rejoice that it wasn’t something more serious.
Yes, I was slightly worried as there is a lot of other stress in my life. Not only is there a unique amount of risk to being a woman, but there is a unique amount of risk to being a teacher these days. Just watch the news. Yada, yada, yada. All of this in addition to state testing. These last two things also burden our students, and when emotionally burdened, some of them act out. I’ve been handling it. I’ve also been looking inward and wondering if I am coming to a crossroads. Is something wrong with me? How will I face it? Shoot, I have asked that question regarding school shootings as well. One good end product of this week, however, is that I have been talking to God more. I go out and walk the dog and see the beautiful night sky, and I know the world and the heavens are still there, no matter what happens to me. I have told him I will face it like a champ and do my best. There are so many others less fortunate, who have fought or lost battles with their health or fought to save the lives of children. I would never go down without a fight in either scenario.
The sum of my week’s anxiety was that I am healthy, maybe getting old and changing, but healthy. So, the rest of the day consisted of relaxing and then discovering my hair stylist could fit me in for a cut and style. I need this hair to be easier to do in the morning. I’m really going for asymmetric. Hey, my chiropractor has told me one leg is longer than the other. We all are pretty asymmetrical, so let’s celebrate it!
May 9, 2019
Character visualization and WIP, Detours in Time Series. #amwriting #scifi
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I’m playing with visualization as the character of Ellie grows stronger in my mind.
Ellie appears across several timelines in Undercurrents in Time (Detours, Book 2), shows up in my WIP, “Malachi,” (2020) and will feature in an upcoming novel (2021?). Who is the mysterious Ellie?
Start reading the Detours in Time series today and get to know the intriguing cast of characters! Available in Kindle, print, or Kindle Unlimited: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0711ZW6XF
Photo Credit goes to Enrique Meseguer via Pixabay.
Series link:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/bookseries/B07F5WPK72/kindle/ref=sr_bookseries_null_B07F5WPK72
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