Scarlet Risque's Blog, page 11

Letting Go

The moment I let go,

there is a new freedom,

to soar the skies,

and be who I am for the world.

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Risque Submissive Training Audio Exclusively on Patreon

Risque will be releasing a monthly audio on deepening her minion’s submission towards her to experience true joy and bliss as a submissive minion. To get more of Risque you can support her at www.patreon.com/scarletqueen to gain access to exclusive clips only available to patreons.  This enables her to film higher quality production to pursue her artistry. We intend to film a movie on The Scarlet Queen once we hit our fan funding milestone. Thank you for your generosity that enables us to pursue our artistry to the fullest.

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Painted Skin Movie (2008) Review and Analysis

Painted Skin is about love, coming from the same author who wrote the story behind The Fox Lovers Movie deriving from Strange Stories From a Chinese Studio. It is a supernatural Chinese classical story based on myths and legends believed by common people in that era – that demons, fox spirits and supernatural powers exist in the backdrop of unorthodox Taoist beliefs to deal with them. In Painted Skin, a warrior rescues a demon who disguised herself as a victim of bandits – she was at the point of getting raped when the warrior rescued her. They fall in love at the point of him rescuing her from the bandits. He brings her home and takes her in as a family member. The tension in the story lies with the fact that the warrior is already married to a woman, and he believes that he has to remain loyal, when in fact, he is in love with the young girl.

In the events that unfold, they find themselves in situations that push the norms of love and marriage conventions at that era.

There are several love triangles at play:

The wife has a past lover who is a war hero, who has came back to the village to hunt down the demon.
Unknown to all, the demon who had disguised herself as a lovely young girl is the source of deaths in the city
The female demon has a male demon lover who kills villagers at night to bring their hearts to feed her, although she is in love with a human, the male demon doesn’t care.
The war hero is still in love with the wife and thinks her husband bringing back a young girl to his home is infringing on her modesty.

At the end, all the characters had to confront what it is to experience true love by letting go.

The wife had to confront that her husband is in love with the female demon and commit suicide so that they can pursue happiness.
The male demon had to accept that the female demon doesn’t love him but has fallen in love with a human, which greatly insults him but he will be there for her nevertheless
The war hero had to accept that the wife did not choose him, but that doesn’t mean he loves her and will be there for her in the moment of crisis.
The female demon had to confront that she could not be selfish in her love and that love wasn’t about getting what she wants, but about letting others pursue their happiness
The demon hunter could only open her sealed sword only by the expression of love and not hate. Only the expression of love could enable her to kill the demons.

I truly enjoyed the movie, especially the pool scene which finally expressed the authentic feelings of the husband, that although he keeps denying what is there, that he is truly in love with the demon by having a vivid dream of her in a red dress, going into a hidden pool behind a cave, and making love in the passionately in an illicit romance that existed as a fantasy but he could not enact in reality due to the fact he was married. It was the moment of revelation in the whole movie that the husband was pretending that there was nothing going on, that he didn’t consider the young girl as his lover, but he kept it so hidden well in his thoughts to be a good husband and general, to the extent he sacrificed his own freedom and expression of love by declining to take on a mistress. Which, was the biggest mistake he made for he could have a wife and a mistress and it would be what he actually wanted, instead of his pretence that he had to prove he is “better than that”.

 

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Shy and Solitary

I spend most of my waking moments in solitude. It is the nature of my profession, of the way I wound up being. That I am extremely uncomfortable when people are watching and when there are eyes on me. My identity comes up and I have a compulsion to run away or act up. It’s only when I am performing at something, like on stage, or a dance recital that I am comfortable with the fact people are looking at me. In all my ordinariness I am as shy as hell.

Networking events are my ultimate challenge. I have to talk to total strangers. I have a script in my head but my words come out weird and intangible. Over time I overcame my shyness and became more confident in front of strangers, I go on stage and speak and ask questions in conferences. Afterwards, people would come up to me and acknowledge me for sharing and participating. It is exceptional for me to get out of being shy and just be with people. It’s really not who I am but the way I have to be to uphold myself on what I am up to.

To most people I am never shy, my friends would describe me as a super powerful woman. When I am back in my solitude, I truly perform at my optimal best. But I know in the long run, I have to be able to perform even in uncomfortable situations, or when thousands of people are looking at me fumbling around. I have to learn to be not in control, to regain control over the fact I am not in control. That’s my next frontier of what I will overcome to be able to speak at conferences in front of thousands of people.

 

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Prolific Writer – The Creator of Worlds

I had been called a “prolific writer” many times by numerous people I meet who stumble upon my blog. It is indeed my outlet of expression and space of introspection that I write out my thoughts to jump to the next frontier of my life. It is a series of propulsion that keeps me going and going. The moment I stop writing, my life comes to a standstill. By intellectualising the process, it helps to figure out what actions I want to take next.

As of today, I am almost 3/4 done on my first draft with the Purple Python. I have to admit this is the most powerful book I had written to date, the writing moves me. As well as my short story, The Prince (working title). I had realised that we will most likely never be together with the person that we love. I am giving up on attaching to the loves of my life and to live a life of solitude. My contribution to the world is not children, but the worlds that my writings create. I distinguished that even by being in a relationship or having children is for my self-gratification, but it may not be what I want or need.

I had experienced true love, and it lives on within me.
I had sacrificed love, and it now exists outside me in spirit.
I had sought for love, and it eludes me like a plague.
For love is giving and letting go.

It is powerful to live a life of freedom without obligation to anyone or anything. It is powerful that I wake up daily before my alarm clock goes off, and write prolifically in a way I had never done before, just by letting go of all the baggage I had been holding on to. It is powerful to perform at my self-actualised self that connects with all instead of portraying a need for validation for my own ego. I am the source of empowerment to those around me, who have set off in different paths to find their actualized states.

Who I am for the world – I am the creator of worlds and source of empowerment for world leadership.

I am fully complete with all the loves of my life. For this, I am able to write in a way that I had no access to before. I had never written about love powerfully. But in the Purple Python, it’s different, it moves me. I read some of the parts I wrote, and I am shocked. I am shocked that I could be so expressive. For so long I numbed myself to the emotion of love, and now it flows like a river. It’s amazing that just by letting go, so much could come into my life.

There is so much love I have to give to this world, and I am going to be the prolific writer that I am meant to be.

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My Rainbow Wings – Post Munch Metamorphosis

There is a Chinese saying that one lives through four stages of life, just like the seasons of the year. I lived as a young caterpillar during the spring of my life, in an empty state of consumption and learning of knowledge. I lived as a formless cocoon in the summer, pleasing everyone wishes and what they expected of me in the society as a faceless soul in the sea of capitalism.

I remembered I was a hungry greedy caterpillar. I chewed on leaves after leaves, full of greed. I consumed and consumed, growing in size, as I ate from day to night. Like a greedy child who was never full despite the amount of candy, his mother gave him.

In an enclosed cocoon state, in a blank state. My identity was formless like water, yet it sparkled like the fragments of a broken diamond. My shiny cocoon insulated me from the weather. It made me turn a blind eye to who I was, inside, as I lived in a half lie and half truth.

In the half-life, I was living in my dreams that one day I would emerge as a Butterfly. I would conquer the skies with my rainbow wings, and find my lover in the lush tropical forest, and flutter into the skies towards dusk.

In my half truth, I was nothing but asleep. Life past by slowly like a film in monochrome black and white. I would drift through life like a floating leaf in the sea, not reacting, but just observing and being engulfed by the waves… sinking into the depths without a choice.

In my half truth and lies, I wore a white and black mask.

When I wore my white mask, I tried to seek for the one to liberate my soul from my dreamlike state. I begged and prayed each night, for someone to save me from the dark night of my soul. I needed help. I felt I was sinking into the ocean depths, and I could not wake up from this terrible dream. I was nothing but a mess of self-pity, that had no reprieve. I craved to submit and worship the one and only one true Master of my desires.

When I wore my black mask, I tried to seek for materialistic needs. I needed more of everything – bags, clothes, houses, holidays. I needed the world at my feet. I wanted to control the minds of minions. I wanted to be worshipped. I wanted everyone to serve my every desire to be at the top of society, as I look down, mocking at the little pathetic minions. I would amuse myself with their antics as I chewed on a bittersweet dark chocolate, enjoying the pleasures of life under the starry skies with a slave kneeling by my feet.

Of course, they were both half truth and half lies.

I wanted to emerge from my disillusion. But I did not know how. Did I need someone to save me? Or do I need to save someone? I was lost.

I stumbled upon a munch. A munch. What was that? A hamburger outing? To my curiosity, it was for people who were like me. Those who were living in their cocoon states, waiting to emerge as butterflies.

At the local munch I met others with their rainbow wings, glittering under the lights in their full splendour. They were happy and high. They were soaring in the skies, accepting each other with tenderness. Their passionate voices were calling out to my soul to emerge, to join them and fly towards the skies.

In my cocoon state, I watched others like me emerge from their cocoons and flutter towards the light. I wasn’t alone in the ocean. There were many others like me, floating aimlessly, waiting for that very chance to shine.

I tore the exterior of my cocoon shell, as I reached a tiny hand out into the open. I felt the atmosphere of warmth and love go through my fingers, deep into my veins, feeling me up with new found sensations that pulsated into my heart strings. I felt a new aliveness, that I was finally going to be liberated from the dark dream state of the enclosed cocoon.

I spread out my Rainbow Wings in it’s full width, I fluttered my wings and flew towards the direction of the light, joining the other Butterflies in their warm loving embrace, mingling and munching in the dance of love.

Thank you, Fetlife.

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There is no fixed way of being

I was having a discussion with a friend yesterday about human beings, that we have no fixed way of being. We can be happy, sad or angry the next moment. We are not a stationary or a fixed object like a chair but a human being that moves from state to another dynamically. Hence, there is an ability for us to continuously reinvent and restructure how we want to create life to be around us at any moment, it is for us to create life the way it mirrors back at us. Of course, life is about parallels and mirrors and echoes, for we create each other based on our interactions with each other.

In the context of which, it is questionable as well. For example, if we are living in an African tribe, polygamy is the norm. But we grew up in a culture where monogamy is the norm due to the social construct based on the media and society that portrays one man to one woman. However, in hunter gather tribes based on anthropology research, humans are a polygamous species. Inherently there is really nothing wrong with having multiple partners in an African tribe, but society views it as wrong in modern societies. It is a perception based on construct and it really is up to us to construct our reality based on what we want to create.

As we are a highly evolved species that has the ability to contemplate and think about our failures and past and future, it creates hesitation towards moving forward. There is a stuckness to what people want to get, they are stuck by what they deem as circumstances, fear of failure and thoughts that exist within but are unreal thoughts. It’s only by going past the failure conversation that one can move towards performance in all areas of life.

I am moving towards being dynamic in all areas of my life – dance, writing, videos, business, relationships and taking on being organised ( although I am extremely messy by default, I can move towards being consciously neat and tidy). My schedule of video production is out on http://thescarletqueen.com and that will be my structure in place to fulfil my promises to the world.

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Filming At The Scarlet Hotel Complete

The filming at The Scarlet Hotel is complete as of April 2017 after hitting our fan funding of US$500 monthly. Thank you to our patreon minions for supporting our artistry and quest to accept oneself for who they are.

The purpose of the series is to create a context of freedom of sexuality as a new context to live into, for with full self-acceptance comes freedom and power.

The Scarlet Queen will look for an independent movie director to turn the Scarlet Queen YouTube into a full-fledged movie production for submission to the Toronto Film Festival to promote awareness for the BDSM community.

The new fan funding milestone of US$2000 will enable the filming of The Scarlet Queen to a full length 40 min feature film to take place.

Do support the channel production at http://patreon.com/scarletqueen and you will be rewarded with pain and pleasure.

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Open Letter Reply To Fan Mail

With permission, I am publishing my replies to an email I received from a fan. My replies are in blockquotes:

Hi Averral,

I read your recent blog entries and felt compelled to reach out to you.  I’m not writing to Risque, and I’m not writing as the fetishist who wrote the worship story for Risque and lusts for her legs.  That’s a small piece of me that I keep very safely hidden away from the real world.  I use that identity as therapy for managing the painful pieces of my life, as traditional therapy would not work for someone like me, nor do I hide from reality with drugs or alcohol.

When I started my YouTube Channel, I was quite a confused switch, but I discovered myself through the process that I am both sides of the equation and that I am one – the one and only Scarlet Queen. I am glad you found yourself in my master artwork.

I just wanted to let you know that your artistry brought that side out of me (even if nobody in my real life knows about that side) and helped me get through a particularly difficult period.  I want to thank you for that.  But more importantly, I just wanted to express my opinion about what might be your purpose as an artist, as I sense your struggle.  I think your purpose is to create awareness that expressing traditionally taboo sexuality can benefit society, not corrupt it (provided it is always safe, sane and consensual).

Precisely, the French philisophers had done that in the Age of Enlightenment. Although Marquis De Sade wrote numerous erotic taboo books and was almost guillotined for that, he was an accomplished philisopher and politician. In Ancient China, I believe sexuality and erotic art was much more open and mainstream than before the communist took over. There are many instances in history that there were periods of libertine and enjoyment of sexuality, compared to conversative times now where there is a heavy reliance on porn and fantasy instead of pursuing healthly, loving deep relationships.

I learned that term when I was researching my worship story. I knew nothing about BDSM and thought it was only for perverts and deviants (based on religious teachings and how I was raised).  But with a little bit of research I learned that it can be a healthy expression of repressed feelings that can be practiced by otherwise “normal” people, not just drug addicts or degenerates (full disclosure… BDSM has become a bit of a fantasy for me, but I still have not crossed the line to try it). You are spreading your word through your platforms, in an unconventional way.  Maybe your way will only really touch 10 or 100 people, or maybe it will grow to influence millions.  And maybe you influence on others will be very different than your influence on me.

As long it touches one person, it doesn’t matter to me if it touches millions or billions. I believe my work will transcend time and space in the grand scale of the universe. If you watch Cloud Atlas the movie, you will realise the musician composed a score and committed suicide soon after. No one heard of the score till centuries later and the musical score sparked a rebellion.

I don’t understand the full meaning and purpose of your artistry, as I am really one of those business school educated people and interpreting art is the last thing I’d be qualified to do.  But my one observation is that in today’s world you can’t just preach to people and expect to be heard, you need to compete with the glitz and glamor and instant gratification easily accessible in today’s world to get attention, and then if you get that attention you can use it to subtly make your point and influence people about your deeper purpose.

There is no purpose in my art except to inspire others like yourself to discover who you are. And move the society towards openness in regards to sexuality.

So my “business school” advice for you is twofold.  First, your YouTube channel creates your attention. To expand your viewership, you might want to do a bit more to make it go viral.  I’m not suggesting nudity or porn or anything like that, and I’m no artist so I don’t even have.a good suggestion, but I suspect you have it in you to create something edgier in your videos and maybe even your books.  Second, far be it from me to presume to know what your ultimate purpose is, but once you have that bigger audience, I trust that you will be able to open minds and if nothing else educate people and move the dial towards a healthier, more respectful, less judgmental society.

With 2.7 million views and counting, I regard my channel a success on it’s own right and I am satisfied at the artistic progress I am making, as well as in my personal development in discovering who I am. In the process, it is educating others to accept their sexuality and who they are, despite social norms and constraints.

That’s how I see you making a difference.  Maybe I’m completely out to lunch, and I don’t usually like to give advice to people, but I thought I would share just in case any small part of this resonates with you and sparks a creative idea or even just helps you get through a tough period like you helped me.  And if it doesn’t resonate with you, I’ll have no hard feelings if you just delete this and dismiss me as a potentially nutty fan who doesn’t know or understand the real you, and just wants to interact with your sexy on screen persona (I can’t deny there is some truth in that, but promise that’s not my motivation for this particular note).  Either way, sorry for the long note, thanks for reading this far, and best of luck on achieving all your goals Averral.

You are welcome, thank you for supporting my artistry.

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Being The Scarlet Queen – Acting Notes

To act as the Scarlet Queen, I have to bring forward my full self-realization and actualization of who I am as a human being. By acting as The Scarlet Queen it has somehow elevated everything else in my life to an entirely new way of being and acting that I have never done before previously. I am alert, present and sharp. My productivity is skywards. There is a calling forth a way of being that never existed previously. If anything at all, it is my source of personal power to be The Scarlet Queen as herself.

My default nature in my ordinary real life self is to be reserved and quiet. I am naturally cheerful and upbeat about life. To get out of character in the past when Risque got too much into me, I had to watch comedy. But now, I had learnt how to go in and out of character so much that it doesn’t really affect the next thing I do. I still write my book on filming days. I still conduct my daily interactions with people and I am on the phone and meeting people often.

I don’t know if any actor would challenge himself to act in a production all by himself consistently for years. A normal theatre production runs one season and that’s the end if it doesn’t have a following. But thankfully I have a great fan following that makes my production possible to explore and discover different aspects of myself via my roles and emotional spectrum. I bring out my feelings and personal experience into every performance. The communication I convey is to be confident and self-accepting of oneself and to be true to your desires. Although the story leans towards BDSM content as that’s my natural self-expression of who I am – it is just the way it is and I am not trying to hide it.

A defining moment in my life was when I watched Cool Devices, a hentai anime with perverse scenes that has shaped my sexuality for the years to come. Saki in Operation 05 and 06 was pretty much what I related to. For years I tried to pretend I am vanilla in university and kept every aspect of my kinkiness under the radar. What happens when you suppress sexuality? It comes out even more. As of now it is pretty much apparent and unleashed in my creativity and I don’t hold back what I want to enact in reality, moving from the realm of fantasy. There are probably millions out there who feel the same way but lead ordinary vanilla lives without exploring the deepest darkest aspects of who they are. But I chose to go into the darkness and back into the light to accept the way I am. Social norms no longer hold any boundaries or constraints in my exploration. After all, we only lead one life on earth. Without exploring our boundaries, how would we know what are our limits or who we truly are?

The Scarlet Queen Series is about exploring our identity, our sexuality, our desires, and our deepest wants. The journey the Scarlet Queen takes the viewers through is to accept oneself and their desires without questioning about what is right or wrong, what is accepted or not accepted, but it is what it is and we should embrace our dualities.

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