Emily Conrad's Blog, page 27

Returning to the Source

I've committed myself to finishing a first draft of a manuscript by the end of the month. I'm 3/4's of the way finished, and I have an idea of how the ending will work, but the specifics are a bit hazy.

This book is part of a series I'm writing where I take basic inspiration from a Biblical account and apply it to a modern day scenario. For example, the first book revolved around the question: What would it look like for an unmarried church-going couple to face a pregnancy their own actions didn't cause? The story grew from there.

Today, I came across a post on Facebook that referenced a verse from the Biblical account that inspired my new story. (Sorry to be vague. I'm not naming the specific account that inspired this manuscript because I'm entering it in a contest that's supposed to be anonymous.) The post reminded me that if I want inspiration for how exactly to finish this story, I needed to go back to the source. I needed to reread at least part of the Biblical account.

Life is like this, too.

If we're professing Christians, living lives that are meant to mirror Jesus's life, we have to keep coming back to him. If we don't spend time in the Word and in prayer, how will we ever know how our next chapter should look? He's the source of light and life. We can't hope to have either without him.

Maybe we could muddle through to a point, but have you ever read a book where the story seemed to lose its way? Events happen, but they don't impact the story and they certainly don't increase its power. Readers lose interest. Some flip through and read the end. Some just quit. It's called a sagging middle and the cures involve things like stronger character motivations for both the protagonist and the antagonist and ruthless critique partners.

In the Christian walk, the cure for this kind of loss of purpose and direction is Jesus. Jesus before we lose our way, and Jesus when we need to get back on track. More and more Jesus.

What have you learned from him lately?

The Pitfalls of Platform-Building

Writers are encouraged to build platforms--people who follow them on social media, who listen to them speak, etc. The idea is that online followers can translate into book sales. One editor I admire and would love to work with stated that they look for an author to have 10,000 social media followers before they will consider publishing their book.

Being the goal-oriented, perfectionist type that I am, once I'd heard it, 10,000 took root in my mind as something of a far-off, best-case-scenario ideal. On one level, I believed 10,000 followers=success.

On a more realistic level, it's important to me to not be spammy, fake, or selfish. So, I've worked hard to keep my online presence positive and encouraging by giving value to people and building relationships. I'm nowhere near 10,000 connections, but I've met a lot of interesting people, and overall, the experience of getting out on social media more has been a positive one.

But I've noticed some of the troubling traps social media has to offer.

Likes, followers, shares, and retweets can become a bit of an addiction to feed feelings of security and worth.

The same source that feeds an ego can starve it with disappearing likes, unpopular posts, and unfollowers.

A starved or slighted ego quickly resorts to worry. Was that post too much of an over-share? Which of the conflicting online etiquette rules are important? And on and on.

Once the worrying ego gets an answer that says it did, in fact, make the wrong move, regret stumbles through the door until the next positive moment shoves it back out and the cycle can start over.

That's a lot of problems to deal with and correct, but thankfully, I think I've found their one, common root: misplaced value. It's something we're all at risk for, whether we're authors building platforms or casual social media users. Or even if we're not online at all.

A friend of mine shared an article on Facebook from RelevantMagazine.com titled "The Surprisingly Depressing Experience of Going Viral" about a man who became an Internet sensation. He's seen the other side of this social media popularity contest, and he writes, "Perhaps what we really crave, more than praise from ten thousand mouths, is intimacy—truly being known."

(Notice he mentioned the magic number, too?)

The author's point and mine is that online popularity will never satisfy us; only God can do that.

If my purpose and my value are tied up in my social media platform, even 10,000 followers wouldn't lead me think to myself that I'm satisfied for life and wouldn't care if I never got another like or another retweet or another follow.

The same goes if I try to tie my purpose and identity to a job or a relationship or an address or... you name it.

If, however, my purpose and value are tied up in the One True God who created me, I will never look at him and think to myself that he's not enough. He is so much more than I could ever imagine or grasp. He is my purpose, my home, my hope, my life, and my light. And yet, he went to the trouble of creating me--and dying for me. He loves me, regardless of how many followers I do or don't have or whether or not I ever publish a book.

Just typing that out gives my soul a refreshing breath of air!

If you're wondering about the pastoral pictures I'm using in this post, and thinking to yourself that they're sort of from the opposite of the social media world, you'd be right. That's because the grand idea of this post is to check the role social media plays in our lives and to reverse the areas where we've let it get out of balance.

Instead of looking to anything else when your soul is hungry for restoration, turn to the Prince of Peace (Psalm 23:1-3). When you doubt your own worth, turn to your Creator (Psalm 139:13). When you're tempted to worry, turn to your Deliverer (Psalm 120:1). When you've made a mess of everything, turn to your Redeemer (Isaiah 43:1).

Is it wrong to use social media ? No. But is wrong for us to find our value there.

I hope you'll join me in refocusing again on God and placing your value squarely and permanently in his nail-pierced hands.

I've Got My Boots On

A few weeks ago, I posted about how I felt tired one day, so I opted to back out of a shopping trip in order to stay home. Not long after, a friend who lives nearby needed me to take her to the ER. I wrote about how I felt God had orchestrated by tiredness in order to keep me where he needed me to be for my friend.

Well. He's done it again.

I wanted to go do something with my sister, so I got ready to go out the door. I pulled my feet into my boots, laced them up and tied them, and gave her a call. But she was already out with our mom, so I sat down at my computer and worked instead of going out. Of course, one of my dogs didn't want to settle down to let me work, so I put him in his kennel.

Less than an hour later, someone rushed up to my door and asked for my help. That same nearby friend was having a health emergency, though we didn't know that as completely as we would come to know it later. Still, God knew the gravity of the situation. He made sure I already had my boots on and my younger, somewhat untrustworthy dog contained so I could run out the door.

We ended up calling 911 immediately, a call I'd been primed to make because I'd just written a scene in which something pretty similar happened. If you're not a writer, maybe it'll sound weird, but that call didn't feel like my first call to 911, though I believe it was.

There's another way God worked in the situation, too. My friend lives alone, but the housekeeper happened to be there when the problems started.

Like last time, I'm reminded that God is constantly working in our lives, even in things like headaches, fatigue, cancelled plans, and misbehaving dogs. God has a plan. He is working in our lives to achieve his purposes, even when the events of our lives seem mundane or disappointing.

We may not see the purpose as quickly as I have recently, but I believe that someday we will. And the reassuring thing is that He does this, not us. We're told to be prepared in some ways--prepared to answer for our hope, prepared for Christ's return, prepared to face God--but in other ways, we're reminded of the futility of our own plans. God's are the only ones that we can be certain will come to pass.

Since he does have a plan, he knows when and how to cause us to put our boots on at just the right moment. We're safe in that, and I, for one, find that a relief.

The Truth About 2016

The truth about 2016 is not everybody made it here, and not all of us will survive it.

My new tagline for my blog (made in 2015), is "faith, fiction, and encouragement," and I don't mean for this post to stray from that by being a downer, but I did have a sobering experience on the last day of 2015: I had to call 911 and wait with an older friend who lay non-responsive on the floor of her dining room until help arrived.

We didn't know then what had happened, but as the paramedics ruled out one problem and then another, they sat her up, and the left-to-right slope of her mouth made it clear she'd had a stroke.

Though she has survived, that was the most serious medical issue I've ever had the responsibility of getting help for, so you can imagine that the experience has left its mark on me.

As I watched her sit helplessly on the floor, surrounded by paramedics, her expression skewed, I knew like I'd never known before that life doesn't last forever. The Bible tells us our lives are vapor. They're here and then gone.


What nags you as you read this? What area of your life is out of order? The good news is that, if you're reading this, you still have the opportunity to work on those issues. Live a life that is rich toward God. Get right with Him, family, and friends. Enjoy your blessings. Take advantage of opportunities. You never know when those things will no longer be an option.

I could write so much more about the experience. I could write about how important faith in Jesus is. (And I urge you not to try facing eternity without Him.) I could write about the importance of inter-generational friendships or doing good for the people around you.

But for today, I'm going to leave it here because, honestly, I'm still processing the whole thing myself.

The truth about 2016 is it's a privilege to have made it this far. Make it a good year. Use it to address those nagging issues because what's true of 2016 will be true of 2017: not everyone will make it, and each day is a privilege.

What being "very Christian" means to me

Someone recently called my Facebook page "very Christian." I much appreciate being associated with Christ, especially in the online sphere, which is my primary way of interacting with those who I hope to encourage with my writing. What an honor and a responsibility that is!

But still, I find myself wondering: What does it mean to be "very Christian" on social media?

I'd guess the stereotype is good online Christians post Bible verses. Their content could be rated G or PG. Maybe only a small percentage of a good Christian's posts are about non-faith-related matters. The list could go on and vary for each person's opinion, I'm sure.

While I do want to look like a Christian on social media, I also don't want to stop there.

Plenty of people claim Jesus as Lord but don't live their lives on a day-to-day basis as if the Bible is true. It's especially easy to do this online, where we can carefully curate our posts to show the world what we want them to see.

Likewise, a person can look like a Christian even in real life without having a heart that truly honors Jesus as Lord.

Funny thing is, if you get to know a Christian well enough (or sometimes just pass by us at the store), and we won't look perfect because we're not.

Even the most genuine, committed followers of Christ fail God, each other, and even themselves. I don't know who wrote it, but someone correctly said, "Christians are forgiven, not perfect." That doesn't mean our failures are excusable. Far from it. We have to repent and ask for forgiveness.

Again and again. Yes, we do believe in sanctification, the process of becoming more and more like Christ the more we walk with him, but we never reach that goal in this lifetime, no matter how close someone may appear to come to that.


When it comes down to it, Christianity isn't about outward appearances, online or in person. It's about clinging to Christ as our most valuable treasure. It's about Him saving us, sinners that we are, and us following Him as our example and Lord.

My prayer is that I would walk the talk that I post, not only in an online or external show, but in the secret places of my life and heart, and that I would be "very Christian" by surrendering all to Jesus as Lord and King.

I'm praying that for you, too.

Counting Blessings

Some of us waited longer than others for snow this year. Wisconsin has a fairly good chance of having a white Christmas most years. We generally see our first accumulation of snow before Christmas, even if that snow happens to melt before the holiday. Not this year.

This year, grass literally grew in December due to highs that occasionally hit the upper fifties. Meanwhile, my cousins in New Mexico, of all places, kept posting picture after picture of snow down by them.

I had to consciously remind myself how nice it was to be able to walk my dogs without all my winter gear on. My legs weren't going numb with cold. That was great, right?

Still, I wondered what was going on. Would it ever snow in Wisconsin?

As a matter of fact, yes.

As I write this on 12/28 (I work far ahead, don't I?), we're experiencing our first snowstorm of the season, and it's a significant one for my area, expected to leave us with 8-9 inches of new snow.

I posted about it, and of course got a comment back from someone who said they'd moved out of Wisconsin and didn't miss our winters. This isn't to say I mind the comment; I totally understand. See, I just realized I'm probably going to be the one to shovel tomorrow...

The snow we long for is fun at first, but the enjoyment wears off rather quickly. All the pretty white stuff gets dingy. It has to be shoved. It means cold temperatures. It blows in your face and has a knack for finding other exposed skin, too.

So many things in life go this way. We long for things, but when they become a reality, we realize all the faults in the blessing. The truth is, there's often more to the reality than the dreamers like to admit, but those dreams are still worthwhile.

Since I'm a writer, I'll use that as another example. I'm working and working toward publication, but once I get there, more challenges will await me. The pressure of deadlines (or so I hear) is constant. Reviews can be demoralizing, sales discouraging, marketing daunting.

Another writer, this one published multiple times and on deadlines from her publisher, reminded me this week to enjoy the stage of writing I'm at. I have the time to write without worrying about when things are due. Another bonus: I'm not under contract to write anything specific.

From my side, I hope she's enjoying the honor that it is to have the dream so many long for. Given her comments, I think she is. But thanks to her reminder, I'm enjoying where I am a little bit more today, too.

I hope you'll do something similar.


Don't discredit the blessings you have in your rush to gain those you still long for. Instead of being jealous of those who have what you want, remember that dream comes with its own set of challenges. Once you do achieve your dream, enjoy your long-awaited prize.

In this spirit today, I enjoyed the snowstorm and the fact that I get to stay home and write. I snuggled up with a mug of tea, my computer, and my story. This was the best way I could think of to make the most of where I'm at in life today.
I hope you do the same.

But Honestly Now...

Last week, I nervously posted about what I'd learned leading up to the day I found out I'd won a writing contest. Yup, I was nervous. In the entry, I admitted to struggling with some niggling doubts regarding how much God cares for me and how much he does or does not want to answer my prayers.

It's not easy to fess up to having doubts, insecurities, or weaknesses, is it? Especially when those doubts assail us though we know the "right" answer but don't feel it or haven't seen it overtly change our lives in a while.

But, God had been gracious to me in my struggle. He walked me through his truth again in a way that struck such a chord in my life, I had to share it despite my fears.

As I'm typing this, that post has received three times the number of hits that my normal posts receive. My blog's pretty small, so maybe the numbers behind that wouldn't impress many people, but they're enough to grab my attention. The post clearly resonated with more people than normal, and based on the comments I've received, I think it's because I was honest and extra-vulnerable when I wrote it.

This has reminded me of yet another one of those lessons that I might know in theory, but that I need to remember to put into practice: Christianity is not about being perfect.

Quite the opposite, in fact.

Consider:
For the Son of Man came to seek and to save the lost. Luke 19:10, NETJesus answered them, “Those who are well don’t need a physician, but those who are sick do. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.” Luke 5:31-32 NET But he said to me, “My grace is enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” So then, I will boast most gladly about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may reside in me. Therefore I am content with weaknesses, with insults, with troubles, with persecutions and difficulties for the sake of Christ, for whenever I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, NETSo confess your sins to one another and pray for one another so that you may be healed. James 5:16, NET

Christians are Christians because we know we are not and could never be perfect. We're trusting Jesus to save us from ourselves, and even though we're striving to become more and more like him, no matter how long we've been believers, we still have struggles.


And we're not doing anyone, least of all ourselves, any favors by pretending otherwise.

Instead, when we share our struggles and how God has worked in our lives to correct them, we help each other. After all, no trial has overtaken you that is not faced by others (1 Corinthians 10:13, NET), and if others are going to face the same trial, why not offer them some of the hope you found in that same situation?

Tomorrow is Christmas, when we celebrate what God did 2000 years ago by sending Jesus to save us, but don't forget to also celebrate the work he's still doing in your life today. See if sharing your story doesn't help someone else.

I'm betting it will.

Talk about Power

In my last post, I talked about God answering prayer and how, much more often than I should, I would be surprised if God were to answer some of my prayers. Maybe you're in the same boat. How often do we, as Christians, feel helpless and victimized? We lament the direction the world is going and the growing persecution we face. We pray for a variety of things from emotional help to physical healing without expecting our prayers to be answered. We're surprised when they are.


I can easily agree with Romans 1:16, which says, For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is God’s power for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. (NET)

Yes, God's power saves us from an eternity of separation from Him. But what kind of effect does that power have in our daily lives on earth? Can we expect to see it at all here?

1 Corinthians 4:18-20 says, Some have become arrogant, as if I were not coming to you. But I will come to you soon, if the Lord is willing, and I will find out not only the talk of these arrogant people, but also their power.
According to my concordance, both the verse in Romans and the verses in 1 Corinthians use the same word for power. But there's a difference in context. In Romans, the power is being exercised by God to save people for eternity. In the other, it seems Paul expects to see God's power expressed in true believers' lives with his own eyes in the physical world.

My concordance says that the word "power" is talking about power of the miraculous variety, usually meaning a miracle. This makes sense. Salvation is a miracle, and the God who works that miracle is powerful to work others, as well.

It seems to me that many Christians--myself included--often think of the "power" we have as the ability to love when it's hard or the ability to resist sin. I do think those are part of it, but I think that if we stop there, we're selling our faith short. God cares, is powerful, and has infused our lives with his power.

I realize there are different schools of thought on how God's power is evident today, and I'm only going to scratch the surface here. My purpose in writing this is to meditate more on God's power in the lives of believers myself, and to help you do the same.


With that in mind, the same word for power as used in the above passages is also used in these verses (all copied from the NET version of the Bible):

Luke 5:17, Now on one of those days, while he was teaching, there were Pharisees and teachers of the law sitting nearby (who had come from every village of Galilee and Judea and from Jerusalem), and the power of the Lord was with him to heal. 

Acts 1:8, "But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the farthest parts of the earth.” 

2 Corinthians 12:8-9, I asked the Lord three times about this, that it would depart from me.
2 Timothy 1:7, For God did not give us a Spirit of fear but of power and love and self-control.

These verses teach me that believers are given power for witnessing to all nations. There's also power for physical healing. The verse in Luke is talking about Jesus healing, but healings did occur at the request of others in the Bible, and Paul certainly seemed sure that he could ask the Lord for deliverance (we don't know for sure that his was a physical ailment). From Paul's example, we see that in the cases where the Lord doesn't use his power to grant deliverance, he has a more significant purpose in mind.

Notice the verse in 2 Timothy lists power separate from love and from self-control. We have power and love and self-control. Three things, not one, so that the power we have is more than the power to love or to resist temptation.


This power is something with real, visible impact in our lives. The Spirit God has given us empowers us to do whatever Christ has called us to do. (I am able to do all things through the one who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13, NET) When that requires a miracle, God is powerful to do it.

The apostle Paul isn't coming to check up on our faith today, but I can assure you that many around us are watching to see if this Jesus thing really works and if there's really any power in Christ.

There is. Let's live our lives accordingly.






 

Confessions from a First Impressions Winner

I didn't post much about winning the contemporary category of First Impressions (okay, other than that duck video...) not because I'm not happy and proud and honored (I'm all of those things!), but because there's a lot for me to process in the win.

As of late, I've felt weak, tired, and doubt-ridden. I've set goals for myself regarding how many words I'll write Monday-Friday and a date when I intend to finish the manuscript I'm pounding out. Though I've kept up, I've found myself counting down to the weekend when I won't have to struggle through all the work. I've felt spiritually and emotionally dry, too. The weather hasn't helped by insisting on clouds and rain for as long as it has.

I prayed about the doubts and the fatigue but only half-heartedly brought to God the contest I knew would be decided on 12/15.

One of my fellow finalists told me she was praying that the one who needed the win the most would receive it. That mindset is a beautiful reflection of faith and love that made me stop and think. First, why wasn't I praying like that? Second, someone needed the win. Yes, Lord, give it to her. 

But I didn't think "her" was me.

Then, I came across a post titled Zechariah A Model of Faith and Unbelief. Could the two go together? Because wow, that sounded like some of what I'd been struggling with! So I clicked over. The blog talked about how Zechariah was righteous but stumbled over doubt when the angel came to tell him his prayers were being answered and he would have a son. The post ended by asking if I'd be surprised if God answered my prayers.

That question haunted me. I've prayed for some things lately (and no, I'm not talking about winning a contest), and I realized that yes, I would be surprised to have my requests granted. I'm just going to be transparent here and confess that the underlying doubt was rooted in a fear that maybe I just don't have that kind of relationship with God. Maybe I'm not dear enough to Him for Him to answer my prayers.

On the morning of 12/15, looking again to be lifted from the slump I've been in, I ended up in Isaiah. Though verse after verse met me right where I was at, I'll pick just one passage for this post today. (Plus the ones in pictures, of course!)

But I thought, “I have worked in vain;
I have expended my energy for absolutely nothing.”
But the Lord will vindicate me;
my God will reward me.
So now the Lord says,
the one who formed me from birth to be his servant –
he did this to restore Jacob to himself,
so that Israel might be gathered to him;
and I will be honored in the Lord’s sight,
for my God is my source of strength –
he says, “Is it too insignificant a task for you to be my servant,
to reestablish the tribes of Jacob,
and restore the remnant of Israel?
I will make you a light to the nations,
so you can bring my deliverance to the remote regions of the earth.”Isaiah 49:4-6, NET
By bringing me to passages like that, God was answering my cries for help. He was showing me that despite my doubt and discouragement, He is strong. Other passages reminded me that He is the God who parted the sea. He is still that God. And that God has great plans for me and will use me and my writing. He does care about me as an individual and as one of His followers.

A few hours later, I got the email saying I had won. It's humbling to confess that I can see how I could be the "her" who needed the encouragement, but I'm happy to say that God began encouraging me long before I got news of the contest.

Now, I'm praying that God will also encourage the other writers who participated in First Impressions, because I know they need it, too.

We all do.

That's why I'm sharing my story today about how God met me in my discouragement through His people and through His Word.

Regardless of whatever contests we win or lose, God is good. He is the God who parts seas and answers prayers. He is working in all our lives to use us in ways we cannot even imagine. He is nearby, and His arm is strong to save.

Don't be surprised when He does.

Share the Love

Have you ever thought about what inspires people to go to church after they've spent months, years, or even a lifetime avoiding it?

In the book I'm writing, I knew I wanted a non-believing character to make the decision to start attending church, but as the story progressed, she wasn't any where near having a desire to do something like that. When another character invited her, she politely refused. Other writers or readers can tell you what this character needed: motivation.

This character would never be ready to go to church unless her need for God was revealed to her in such a strong way she could no longer politely brush it aside.

Real life people need motivation to go to church, too, and my experience is that it's the painful stuff that sends people to seek answers from God.

Unfortunately, for as much as it takes to inspire a person to come to church, it doesn't take much to scare them off, and that's fair. Church visitors are already in a fragile state because they're often in pain, or at the very least, are going through the discomfort of being the new person entering a well-established group.

I've heard of visitors being turned off to church by not being greeted or even one sad situation where a visitor overheard a comment about how they "took" the seat of a regular attender. I've heard of visitors being put on the spot with a (possibly well-meaning?) question about the visitor's "faith journey."

It's sad because each of these situations could've been avoided if Christians had been loving and sensitive. Instead, the comments resulted in people visiting church and deciding not to go back.

As followers of Jesus, believers need to be overflowing with his loving and understanding spirit. Jesus said in John 13:34-35, "I give you a new commandment – to love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.
No wonder an unloving reaction toward visitors makes them run the other way fast. If we don't show love, how will they know we're Christ's true disciples? How will they know we have hope that can heal whatever they're going through? How will they know that Jesus works?

It's simple, isn't it? Greet people, be friendly but not overbearing, make it easy to be the new person.  Show love so that everyone will know you're a disciple of Christ.