Kourosh Dini's Blog, page 11

Forgetting the Most Important Part

So, what do you do for a living?

or

What do you work on?

Either appears to be a simple question. But if you really wanted to give the essence of what you do, beyond some simple label, I imagine you run into problems.

But try respond in a sentence or two and what happens?

I imagine you start, but then fumble. Maybe you think “it’s boring” and are left speechless. Maybe you find it interesting, but then you struggle to find the words of what makes it exciting.

The deeper we go into any field of kn...

When our Systems Collapse

“It’s all going well. Uh oh.”

Even when things are seemingly going well, when you are getting your work done and making it to the things you enjoy, many of us can feel frightened that it will all come crashing down.

Something will get missed. Many things will get missed. The “I don’t wanna” feelings will take over.

We wait with baited breath while, things seem to be moving forward. The external structures of work, school, or family holds us in some scaffolding. Fingers crossed,

“Maybe this time ...

First Excitement, then Frustration, then the “Click”

Plucking at the corner of a box’s cellophane wrapping, trying to find that small weakness to make some tiny hole to tear the rest off–it is a lovely little puzzle, a tease of the excitement waiting within the board game I’m about to open.

I slide the cover off, anticipating, What did the designers place up front? What did they want me to see first? Aha!

Then there are the multiple pieces to poke out of their cardboard homes. The sensation of the components, their look, their feel, their weight, ...

“Wait, what were you talking about?”

Uh oh, I’ve wandered off… she’s still talking… what’s she talking about?

I hope I figure it out before it’s my turn to say something.

I’ll just keep nodding until then.

Minds wander, some more than others.

But when it wanders often, we might be embarrassed.

Maybe she’ll think I don’t care

Maybe she’ll think I’m dumb

There are any number of worries with which we can shut ourselves down, furthering a spiral into confusion and silence.

Maybe we yell at ourselves for this drifting of thought.

Maybe ...

Finding a Way Forward When “I Just Don’t Wanna”

“I don’t wanna” feelings can hit strong.

Not only when trying to do work but sometimes even with those things we’d normally enjoy.

One psychiatrist, Dr. William Dodson, described several emotions that can help us engage:

1. Challenge
2. Interest
3. Novelty
4. Urgency
5. Passion

Together, we can remember these, as one student had suggested, as the “CHIN-UP” emotions.

The idea is that if we can find one of these emotions within our work, we have a better chance of moving forward.

Great. Problem so...

A Fallacy of “Trust”

One of the most powerful concepts I’ve read in productivity is that of David Allen’s “trusted system”. The better we can build systems we trust to present what we want, when we want them, the better we can be present.

But what does that phrase, “trusted system” mean? The word “trust” itself can be messy.

In a movie, we regularly see some version of a dangerous high stakes moment, a doomsday clock somewhere ticking away, as the protagonist confronts some character defining decision, when someone ...

Do Deadlines Drive Your Productivity?

Dear Reader,

“I do my best when my back is up against the wall.”

Sounds familiar? Well you’re not alone. Many rely on looming deadlines as a primary motivator. But is it always the most fulfilling approach?

Depending on deadlines often results in a Force and Fear based system. Here’s what that means: We’re driven not by genuine motivation or interest but by the impending dread of a deadline. Emotions cloud our work, but that ticking clock forces them aside.

Isn’t there a better way?

I’ve explore...

Don’t Write It Down?

Write it down. Get it out of your head. Your mind is for having ideas, not holding them.

Productivity advice often centers around getting things out of your head.

Notetaking advice is often similar:
– Always write your thoughts down.
– Writing is thinking.

In many ways, writing and “getting things out of your head” through writing can be powerful. Writing certainly helps me organize my thoughts and store my intentions as tasks.

For example, to wrap up a session well, we can consciously consider:...

But ‘I Just Don’t Wanna’

Laundry? Taxes? Work report?

“I don’t wanna” feelings can run strong. They are often complex, irritating, and frustrating.

Whether someone tells us to do something or even when we tell ourselves, it doesn’t matter. That internal sense of agency can feel threatened, and a mix of emotions begin to rise.

And as they build, so does our desire to protect ourselves from them, often culminating in some version of:

“But, I just don’t wanna!”

Where does this thought come from? More than just the specific...

I’m Sorry. I Can’t Do the Laundry. I Just Don’t Have the Dopamine **aka the Scientific Metaphors of Play**

“I’m sorry. I can’t do the laundry. I just don’t have the dopamine.”

I’m paraphrasing the above from a social media post. It was humorous as these videos often are.

But similar to what I’d described recently, the conversation usually stops here. We are left throwing up our hands,

“Hell, I can’t do the things.”

We might even point to authority figures to lend support to this helpless position. For example, Dr. William Dodson describes the following as a list of characteristics that tend to motiva...