Judith Iris Quate's Blog, page 9
September 27, 2015
#THE POPE IN PHILADELPHIA
What a glorious weekend here in the city of brotherly love. I now live 10 miles outside of the city but it is my home town for 55 years. I am so proud to show off our beautiful city and that we were chosen to be part of his first visit here to the United States.
Most of you know I am not Christian; however, I am so enthralled by his realism, the aura that appears to surround him and his humanistic ability to reach out to as many people he can–prisoners, the disabled, victims of abuse by clergy and children along with their families.
This is a definite highlight for our city and I really believe this experience will be within our hearts for a long
September 21, 2015
BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS: THE RIGHT TO HAVE AND EXPRESS YOUR OWN FEELINGS AND OPINIONS
A professional gave me a copy of a page in a book, 86 T.I.P.S for the Therapeutic Toolbox, written by Judith A. Belmont, M.S., to help me understand where I stand as a woman. At the time I was struggling with issues of self respect and she was helping me with this along with other emotional issues.
I placed the page on my bulletin board in my studio where I saw it whenever I was working. It is a list of 20 basic rights that we all have, men and women, and they should be honored and respected by all.
I decided to create a series based on all 20 on this list as blog posts. Today I am going to write about the first right, “The right to have and express your own feelings and opinions.” This is my own respective opinion .
We all come from different heritages, cultures and religions where what is believed within the family is passed through different generations. I respect this and understand it is their faith in what they believe. The traditions are carried down from great-grandparents, grandparents, parents and the children of today. I understand how important their beliefs are and if today’s children want to continue with their faith and culture, they should be allowed to and live in peace with it.
However, if you lived within a family unit where respecting one’s personal rights were not practiced and it became a learned behavior, in my opinion, you do not have the right to bring this behavior to your newly created family and expect your family to live with this practice.
There needs to be a time when generations of disrespect among family members has to stop. The generational mannerisms of a family needs to stop somewhere and one member has to take the responsibility to do so because it is disrespectful to place the burden on your loved ones to put up with the emotional abuse.
A man or a woman in a family unit should never lose the right to have and express your own feelings and opinions. It is your right to your opinions and feelings and never let anyone take that away from you.
NOTE: I want to thank Judith A. Belmont for creating her book, 86 Tips for the Therapeutic Toolbox, (2006) and her web site is http://www.worksiteinsights.com. This list she created served to be a great tool for me.
September 14, 2015
HELP THE CHILDREN OF GHANA PLEASE!!
I normally would not use my blog to campaign for funds and you will rarely see me do it, however; I made an exception for this organization.
Kids Care International is a nonprofit organization whose main goal is to raise money for the children of Ghana to help provide them with school supplies such as pencils, notebooks, chalkboards and most importantly, mosquito bed nets so they can be protected from the mosquitos who spread the germ causing malaria.
These children need to prosper, learn and become well educated adults. If you are able, please help me help them. I would also appreciate if you would be so kind to reblog this post.
Here is my campaign site for this great cause
https://www.giveforward.com/fundraiser/2v3b/the-children-of-ghana-need-your-help#
Thank you friends
HUGS
Judy
September 12, 2015
THE DAY IN THE LIFE OF A MENTALLY ILL MAN
Recent circumstances pertaining to a family member of mine forces me to speak out and advocate for the mentally ill individual. Our family member has paranoid schizophrenia. He lived with his parents all his life . Six years ago, his comfortable and somewhat stable life was turned upside down when his mother passed away and he found himself alone for the first time.
We tried our best to find suitable living arrangements for him. Unfortunately, he needs personal living care where he could receive structure, guidance and help with daily living. The dilemma is, there is few available facilities for him to go. They either have long waiting lists or the quality of care they offer is not suitable.
So, what do you do for this 51 year old man who has been taken care of by his parents all his life? He doesn’t have the skills to live alone. He was living in his family house in a big city after both his parents died with no supervision. We had no choice but to find the most suitable arrangements for him to try and give him the security he needed.
He is now living north of the city, away from familiar surroundings, in a boarding home located in a small township. Unfortunately, he has the freedom to walk the streets when he wants. He doesn’t have the daily structure he desperately needs.
In the past year he was fined for buying cigarettes for minors and recently has been fined on three different occasions for pan handling. He could be described as socially immature. He doesn’t realize he is wrong due to the strong urges manifested by his paranoia.
He receives three meals a day and his Medicare disability just covers his room and board, leaving him with just enough money for personal needs. His personal needs consist of cigarettes, coffee, soda and fast food. He spends his entire allowance in one day causing him to look elsewhere to fund his needs, which is buying his cigarettes, soda, coffee and fast food. This is the manifestations of his disease, he must have money for his needs.
This is the life he is forced to live. He will do almost anything to feed his paranoia, including panhandling.
He lives in a small town with a small police force and after a few confrontations, they most likely know him and is aware he is mentally ill. However, this didn’t stop them from giving him citations over $100.00 each. He doesn’t have the money, the appropriate living structure and even knows or cares he is disturbing people by pan handling because he is mentally ill and unable to control his paranoid tendencies.
He is not getting the support he needs because our politicians are taking away funds he so desperately needs to properly secure him in a personal care facility where he would get better care, daily structure and daily living help.
Many years ago our state closed an inpatient care facility in our city without providing for alternative care for the men and women who lived there all their lives. These people are living in the streets now. My family member would not hurt a fly but what about the severe mentally ill individuals who are purchasing guns and using them to create mass murder. This is what happens when the mentally ill are pushed under the rug because our government refuses to correct the issue of properly caring for the mentally ill.
September 5, 2015
IF YOU WERE A SUPER HERO, WHO WOULD YOU WANT TO BE AND WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH YOUR POWERS?
I belong to a writers club and we are given prompts each week and asked to write about it. I thought it would be a good topic for my blog and I hope I receive responses from all of you. It will be fun to share our super hero fantasies.
I suppose you want to know who I picked. At first I needed to really think about it. I never was a fan of movies about a super hero. However, I loved to watch a television show that was on the air many years ago. It was “I Dream of Jeanie.” Okay you young folks out there, go on Google and look it up.
Samantha was the Jeannie who was portrayed by Barbara Eden. Her master was an astronaut whose name was Tony, portrayed by Larry Hagman. Samantha was not your every day Jeannie. She fell in love with her man who she granted wishes for by wiggling her nose.
With that being said, if I could only wiggle my nose and take away all the violence our world and country is experiencing. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? A peaceful world to live in. WOW!
I wouldn’t stop there, however; I would like to take away all the
August 30, 2015
Ten Years Later
I just finished watching Sunday Morning on CBS. A majority of today’s show was dedicated to the remembrance of the devastation of Katrina that hit New Orleans hard ten years ago yesterday.
Millions of dollars were raised and used to rebuild the infrastructure of the city, rebuilding the stadium, high rise office buildings, a beautiful high tech hospital and new schools; however, it appears the money provided to rebuild all of New Orleans was distributed unfairly, full of loop holes and red tape.
The portion of the documentary made it clear to me, the powers to be who distributed the funds to rebuild houses were discriminating. Houses similarly structured in white neighborhoods were rebuilt with funds from insurance and government grants. However, the same structured-type houses before Katrina, were under valued based on demographics of the neighborhood before Katrina. The people in the poorer neighborhoods are still without houses.
Please watch the YouTube piece I found. This clearly demonstrates the problems and discrimination some New Orleans neighborhoods are experiencing. I am not surprised, this is happening all over our country demonstrated by recent violence in our cities.
I feel we are going backwards in our country related to discrimination. I am a firm believer of equality to all regardless of race, religion, sexual orientation and disabilities. Come on people….we all are the same in our souls and hearts.
August 29, 2015
CAN ONE BE HAPPY IN LOVE?
An interesting question and one I believe needs to be evaluated further.
In many cultures and religions, couples meet for the first time on their wedding day. Their parents negotiate and make the match for their union. This tradition has been followed for many years and the children understand and accept it as part of their beliefs. I would like to believe they learn to embrace the tradition and hopefully with time, love develops in their union. However, I hope they are happy in love.
I wonder at what age do we really have the concept of what true love is. A couple who meets and marries very young, are they mature enough to understand the meaning of real love. What will happen to their love if they unfortunately are challenged with unexpected tragedy? Will they be happy in love?
What is real love? Is real love only portrayed in movies or novels? I want to believe there are many couples who experience real love. I want to believe they meet at a young age, not yet matured enough to understand real love, but found it after many years together and it grows to be true love. They are happy in love.
Of course there is true unconditional love a dog will share with their owners. Humans need to learn from dogs and how they truly express love. There is nothing more gratifying then the unconditional love a dog shares with their owner.
Unfortunately, there are marriages that may begin with mutual love but for some reason, the mutual love they believed they had, was built on nothing but misunderstandings, personality changes which leads to some type of abuse.
To summarize and clarify, simply, love is hard work. If you really believe in love, work hard in your relationship, respect each other, honor each other and just maybe you will experience happiness in love.
August 28, 2015
August 23, 2015
A Special Book About A Special Child
Originally posted on Jax Jillian, Author:
Whenever I meet a fellow Tate Publishing author, I always want to be of any help and support towards their success as I can be. This lovely author, Judith Quate, pours out her heart and soul into her novel, Our Special Child: Jason’s Story. To allow yourself to be so vulnerable and let strangers into the most personal and intimate details of your life takes a lot of courage. Please take a closer look.
What would you do if suddenly you are presented with a diagnosis for your child of spastic quadriplegic cerebral palsy? Would you scream and run out of the room? Would you contemplate walking away from a reality you cannot accept and just run as far as you can; or would you do what this young mother did, accept the devastating news and figure out what you need to do to help your child.
Our Special…
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August 22, 2015
A Day at the Park
What a beautiful day to go for a ride. The window is open just a bit for me to feel the warm sunshine on my face and the window is adjusted just right enough to control the wind from hitting me directly. I am excited to know where we are going. Normally I don’t care because I love adventures, they never disappoint me. I overheard the staff talking yesterday among themselves, something about how we all are going to be excited for our day trip tomorrow. Did I say I love adventures?
The van is slowing down, stopping at a building. Mary, who is the designated driver for today’s trip, handed a paper to the person in the window and off we went over to the parking lot to park the van. I wait patiently while my friends are taken one at a time over to the ramp to be lowered to the ground.
We are all unloaded now sitting in our wheelchairs. I wonder where we are. I see trees, grass and many people heading towards an entrance. I can see beyond the entrance and there are many different objects, some small, round, square and something that looks like train rails. This object appears to be very large in places like mountains and then it drops down sharply and lands in water. Wow….that really is interesting and I hope someone takes me to the entrance soon so I can get a better look.
Jerry is in charge of wheeling me. He whispers in my ear and says, “just you wait Jason, I have a special surprise for you.” He now has my full attention because Jerry is a cool cat. He once ran with me down the hallway of my building and let me go at the top of the ramp, and off I went. I laughed so hard I believe I wet my pants. Unfortunately for Jerry, his supervisor wasn’t at all happy with him.
Anyway, Jerry is now wheeling me through the gate at the entrance of the park. I am anticipating something fun and exciting. Now that you know Jerry, you can believe he has something special for me.
Jerry walks over to another staff member, they talk for a few minutes and he returns and off we go on our own. I see so many people, hear lots of noises sounding like happy people, laughing joyfully and screaming in delight. I see so many different colors and objects that I never saw before. Jerry whispers to me again, “You are going to have so much fun.” Okay, I am now visually excited, my arms are getting tense. I cannot control my spasticity. Jerry really knows how to build excitement in me.
Suddenly we are at our destination. We stop at the place I saw from the parking lot, you know, the thing that looks like a train rail up a mountain and extends down to, what looks like, a very large pool.
Jerry appears to be having a slightly angry discussion with the person in charge of letting people enter this ride on the rail. I hear the person telling Jerry I cannot go on this ride. He says I am disabled and they cannot be responsible for me .
After a few minutes another person arrives and again Jerry is talking with him. I hear Jerry pleading with this person that I would love this ride and he will sit right in back of me and place the strap around both of us. He assured him I will be in safe hands and continued to say he had no right to deny me the opportunity to have fun like a normal person.
I am thinking how proud I am that someone wants to take me on a ride that only “normal ” people go on. I think to myself, I am normal. Because I sit in a wheelchair doesn’t make me any different than a normal person. I know Jerry will make sure nothing happens to me. He knows how to keep me safe. Why can’t I do what “normal” people do. I have feelings and needs.
It appears Jerry won the argument and the next thing I know Jerry lifts me up and places me in this box that looks like a boat, and he slips in right behind me. We are strapped together and Jerry holds me tight, one arm around my chest and his other arm on my head. Off we go, slowly up a large mountain in this box that looks like a boat. Higher and higher we climb. I am not afraid, I trust my friend Jerry.
We reach the top, stop for a second or so, and down we go, really fast. The wind is hitting my face, Jerry is holding me still when I begin to stiffen with the thrill of anticipation. Jerry is screaming in my ear and I am screeching in delight as the boat-like -box splashes in the water and we both get wet. I don’t care! Jerry looks at me to see my reaction and he knows I loved it and want to go on this wet ride again and again.
