Sparkle the Designer Cat's Blog, page 430

Guess Who My Human Met in San Francisco?

Here I am, back at the laptop after it (and my human) went missing for nearly four days! They were up in San Francisco for a publishing conference, where my human talked to people about the Cat Rescue book. She came home with all sorts of ideas and business cards — and she met someone very special! I will show you a photo — can you guess who it is? I bet you can’t:

If you said Spitty, you would be 100% wrong! Although my human did have brunch with Spitty’s human and Savannah’s human on Sunday. This kitty isn’t a blogger, but you may remember me writing about her a couple months back. This was the kitty that my human helped find a home with a friend of hers! Her name is Cassius Clay, or Cassie for short. There is an interesting story behind her name: when my human’s friend was very young, her mother (a very awesome, 1960s kind of lady) had a cat named Cassius Clay (Muhammed Ali’s name before he changed it). Cassius was a very friendly cat — and somebody stole him! My human’s friend’s mother died in the 1990s, and naming this kitty after the cat that was stolen was a way to honor her memory.

My human said Cassie is a very nice kitty! She came right up and wanted attention and loved getting petted and hanging out. My human’s friend got lucky adopting such a pretty, outgoing kitty!

Not only is Cassie a nice kitty, she and her human gave us some gifts! Let’s see what they are.

It’s some catnip, a toy and a couple of cards. Oh yeah, and some lipgloss for my human.

My human was so glad to help out Cassie — and this is the first time she has gotten to meet a cat she has helped through social media!
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Things You Should Never Let Your Human Get Away With

I had an argument with my human over the title of this blog post, because she claimed it was grammatically “hideous.” I say that it is just fine because 1) as a headline, it does not need to be grammatically correct, and 2) it makes its point. As you can see, since the headline stayed, I won. And that is the whole deal here — your word should stand, but humans are always trying to fiddle with that. And if they think they are winning, then who knows what else they will try? I have a nice, memorable saying for you — and even better, this time it is grammatically correct:

You’ve got to keep a rein on humans, or they will try to reign over you!

Here are a few things your humans may try to get away with — but don’t let them!

Giving you any food just because it is healthy, and not accounting for taste! Seriously, they should know better than that — do you see them eating dull, tasteless food just because it is good for them? Of course not! And if they do try to eat boring food on one of their periodic “diet” attempts, it does not last very long. Humans need to keep palatability in mind when dishing out our food — the healthy part should be a bonus.

Telling you to stay off the counters and/ or the dining table. Always remember — it is your house and you can do whatever you want!

Not sharing their food with you. If they are vegetarians, okay, you don’t want it, but if they are eating meat, it is not right if they keep it to themselves. Humans are naturally selfish, so it is especially crucial to train them in this area.

Trying to give you old, stale catnip! Most humans know that spices have a shelf life, so why they don’t get this when it comes to dried catnip, I’ll never understand. They need to toss out the old stuff that has lost its potency and get some new, fragrant nip on a regular basis.

Neglecting to scoop/ freshen/ change your litter box on schedule. Lots of humans are good about this, but even they can be forgetful sometimes. How would they like it if people used their porcelain litter box and never flushed? So yeah, make sure they keep on top of that.

How should you dole out punishment if you see your humans trying to get away with any of these? I’ll leave that up to you — in fact, I’d love it even more if you left a comment and let me know what your humans try to get away with… and how you keep them in line!
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Sunday Catinee: Wildcat Hairdresser

I could have sworn I featured this video some time ago, but I scoured through my Sunday Catinees and I didn’t see it, so here it is — a serval who seems to have fallen in love with a cameraman’s curly mane!

If you can’t see the above video, click here to watch it on YouTube!

I know Star of Celestial Kitties finds hair intoxicating — any of you other kitties into hairdressing?
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Caturday Art: The Polishing a… Ahem! Edition

Not every terrible photo is salvageable, but every so often my human finds one that she thinks has “possibilities.” Case in point: the orange and white rescue kitten she photographed at some event a couple of years ago. Can you believe she actually thought this would make a good faux oil painting?

The photo is way too dark, it is out of focus, and once she cropped and lightened it, there were even more problems — the carpet the cat was on was a mess! Plus there was another cat’s foot in the corner. With a big object like that, it’s hard to erase it in Photoshop with the Clone Stamp or the Spot Healing Brush tool. But there is a quick way to get rid of these types of things. It’s as easy as surrounding it with the Lasso tool (its shortcut is L).

Once you have the marching ants around the offending object, go up to the Edit menu and click on the Fill command in the drop down menu.

Now, here is the important part. When the next window opens, you want to make sure to use the Content Aware option. It will fill in the area to match everything that surrounds it.

It works (most of the time), almost like magic!

My human cleaned up the rest of the photo with a combination of the Content-Aware Fill, Spot Healing Brush and Clone Stamp. Now it does not look half bad. This is what she refers to as “polishing a turd” (hence the title of this blog post). Then, she took the easy way out and filtered the photo through the AKVIS ArtWork software that she used for my Caturday Art post a couple of weeks ago. This time, she used the Oil Painting filter. And you know what? It does make a pretty cool oil painting!

For more Caturday Art, visit Athena!
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Just For Fun: A Cat-Designed Home

A couple of days ago I got an email from somebody who had an infographic with the topic, “What would happen if you let a cat design your home.” So I took a look at it… and I liked what I saw! Yeah, I imagine it was created to plug this home decor website, but it’s still pretty cool. Enjoy!

What if you let a cat design your home by Terry’s Fabrics.
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Sparkle’s Human Astrology for Cats: Aries

Aries

March 21–April 20

Let me tell you a story that illustrates the feline relationship with an Aries human. It’s pure fiction, but I am sure it has happened somewhere, to some kitty who lives with an Aries: Her human wants to get her a cat tree, but can’t afford to buy the one he thinks she deserves. He has the idea for the absolute perfect cat tree in his head, so he decides, “Why not just make it?” With a little research (or perhaps none at all), he goes shopping and comes home with all the things he thinks he needs — the wood posts and planks, the carpet, the bolts (almost forgot those!), and lots of cool cat toys to dangle off the platforms. He spreads them all out in the living room and proceeds to put together the tree, just the way he imagined it… except the idea in his head just doesn’t seem to match all the pieces in front of him. He works on it for a while, then gets frustrated and stops. He goes on to other things, and a few days later he gets back to the pieces that are still sitting in the living room. Once again, he is stumped — but he will finish it and it will be awesome, he is sure! This scenario goes on for a few weeks and still, cat tree parts are cluttering up the living room.

Now, if you were another human, you might be a little annoyed by the Aries human’s penchant for coming up with ideas too grand to finish. But we cats, we don’t really care about that. We are just as pleased to scratch the carpet that is loosely stapled to the platforms that are sitting on the floor, or climb to the top of that unsteady post and use it to launch onto the mantelpiece over the fireplace. As cats, we don’t think about what could have been — we are happy enough to use what is there. A cat just knows that her Aries human did something for her and she is fine with that. And Aries humans are glad to have someone giving them an A for effort, even when the overall project gets an Incomplete.

That is not to say that life with an Aries human is all appreciation and unfinished projects. With their big dreams, Aries humans are capable of accomplishing amazing things, and when they have a goal they will go directly to it. But while they are chasing that goal, they may forget your dinner or your bedtime treats ritual. They will impetuously accept a last-minute out-of-town trip and scramble to find a pet sitter for you. Other humans may appreciate how honest and straightforward Aries people are — but we cats, with our roundabout way of expressing ourselves, may confuse our Aries people. Subtle cat language is not native to Aries humans, and often you will have to make things obvious to them. You, sitting by an empty food bowl and screaming, they will get. You, knocking the loaf of bread onto the kitchen floor because you are hungry, they will not.

While you may have the occasional communication problem with Aries humans, they will more than make up for it with their optimistic, enthusiastic attitude. Aries humans can brighten a whole room when they are in a good mood, and when they aren’t… they tend to get over it quickly unless it’s something really major, in which case your sympathetic purrs will be warmly welcomed. Aries people love freely and passionately, and that kind of uncomplicated affection is always a gift.

The feline signs that will have the most fun with Aries humans are Gemini and Sagittarius — these signs are alive with energy, and Aries will admire your ingenuity and smarts. Independence is important to you three sun signs, and Aquarius too. Aquarius kitties are loaded with imagination and Aries will enjoy your antics (or most of them). Leo cats may not get the worshipful attitude from Aries that they really want (Aries leads and does not follow), but you will appreciate that Aries fire and upbeat nature. Taurus kitties may need some adjustment, however — you prefer lots of quiet time and you like your cat furniture well made and sturdy. But you also instinctively understand that your Aries human is doing his best. Virgo cats may also find some of Aries’ impetuous ways a bit worrisome, and it may be an effort for you to learn to go with Aries’ flow. Capricorn kitties will find Aries humans a bit on the chaotic side too, but you are good at figuring out how to manage these balls of energy (just don’t tell them I said that!). Your persistence and smarts can get them on a routine with minimal griping. Scorpio cats will have a very deep emotional bond with their passionate Aries human, although you may hurt your Aries’ feelings on occasion because you hold a grudge way longer than they do! Libra kitties, headstrong Aries humans may not always see your side of things, but you have a way of charming the best out of them. Sweet, sensitive Pisces kitties are a surprisingly good match for Aries — they instinctively are compelled to be gentle with you. Out of all the feline Zodiac signs, Cancer is the most emotionally needy, and you may find Aries lacking in this regard. Cancer loves to be nurtured, and to nurture in kind – something that most Aries humans aren’t good at, so in an Aries-human, Cancer-feline relationship, it’s always good to have a second kitty picking up the slack.

What about an Aries cat and an Aries human? Talk about fireworks — and mostly the good kind. Life will never be boring when then two of you are together. The main problem will be that both of you want to be Top Cat. Aries kitty, I have some advice for you: let your Aries human think he or she has won this battle. It does not mean you’ve lost (not in the least!), but all humans like to think they’re in charge, and Aries doubly so. Don’t worry, the rest of us will know the truth.
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Thankful Thursday

I just wanted to say a few quick words of gratitude to all my readers today for the kind and lovely compliments you paid me for my #TwitterFiction story, “Molly to the Rescue”! Many of you on Twitter followed the story there, and I got some awesome Retweets and Favorites from you! And those of you not on Twitter who read it later shared about it on Facebook and even on your own blogs! I am so flattered and honored that you enjoyed my story enough to give it shoutouts.

The thing about writing is that it is done in a vacuum, and even when you put it out there, sometimes there is little or no feedback. And while writers write because they have to, the whole purpose of the written word is to communicate. The highest compliment you can pay a writer is to say you heard what they were saying and it touched you. My human has written since she was 7 and she has written as a profession since 1986, so she has been doing it long enough to know that unsolicited compliments only happen when people are really passionate about something they read. She takes it for granted now that she will get very little feedback for her efforts, or mine — so we were both really blown away by how much everyone enjoyed the simple little story of a kitty who got lost. And even happier that several of you shared about Citrus, the real life “Red Boy” who needs a home.

So thank you again. I am a very lucky kitty to have so many enthusiastic readers!
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Molly to the Rescue, Part 2 – and About Red Boy

Photo by Rocky Mountain Feline Rescue on Flickr

Here is the second part of my story “Molly to the Rescue” (Part 1 is here). At the end I’ll tell you about the big guy above who is standing in for the character of Red Boy!

Molly to the Rescue, continued

It wasn’t the two dozen cats swarming around the woman that made Molly pause, or the big bag of food she held.

It was the woman herself — Molly knew her! She was a friend of her person’s. A nice, older woman named Linnea.

Cautiously, Molly crept towards Linnea, keeping low. It was not Linnea she was afraid of, but the cats.

Linnea turned towards Molly but her welcoming smile turned to shock. “Molly!” she said. “What are you doing here!”

Molly sat up, but as soon as she did, a couple of the cats ran at her. They paused nearby, ears back, hissing.

Red Boy charged at the cats and blocked them, but Molly didn’t see. She had already run back through the fence.

Back under the bush, Molly watched Linnea feed the cats. Every so often, Linnea looked up, searching for Molly.

Molly saw Red Boy looking for her too. But she didn’t move. All those strange cats made her feel nervous.

But Molly heard something that neither Linnea nor Red Boy could — the two men she saw earlier were talking.

The men were behind her, nearby but out of sight. Their very presence made the fur stand up on Molly’s spine.

“As soon as that crazy cat lady is gone,” said one, “we’ll set out the traps. She won’t miss a few of ‘em.”

“Yeah,” the other man agreed. “She’ll just think the coyotes or a dog got ‘em. There are lots of coyotes around.”

His partner chuckled. “Heck, there are enough dangers out there to make a whole colony of cats disappear.”

“Meanwhile we’ll make a nice profit from the dealer,” the first man said. “A lab will put them to good use.”

Although Molly couldn’t understand everything the men said, she could tell it was very bad for the cats.

Linnea finished feeding the cats and gathered her things. She looked for Molly once more and called out to her.

Molly wanted to answer, but she was still too scared of the other cats. She stayed under the bush.

A few minutes after Linnea’s car drove off, the two men came out of the shadows, holding three wire cat traps.

Quickly, they set the traps down and tossed some fried chicken legs inside. Molly could smell the tempting aroma.

A few cats came over to the traps. The chicken was irresistible. The cat in the lead was Red Boy. Molly gasped.

Before she could do anything, Red Boy dashed into the trap to grab the chicken. The wire door slammed down.

The noise of the trap door scared the other cats away. The two men walked over to the trap, where Red Boy was.

“Well, one is better than none,” said the taller man. “Let’s get out of here.” But as he reached for the trap…

Molly charged at him and jumped on his back, all claws out. Nobody was going to take her friend away!

“Get it off me!” the man screamed as his friend tried to help. Molly held firm. Suddenly she heard her name.

“Molly? Molly!” It was her person, holding a bag of her favorite treats and staring at the men. Molly jumped down.

“Who ARE you?” she asked them. “We work for the owner,” one said. “He asked us to get rid of these cats.”

“Liar!” Molly’s person said. “I’m his daughter and he loves these cats. You will be fired when I tell him.”

The two men ran off and Molly’s human released the latch on Red Boy’s trap. He walked out and shook himself.

Molly ran up to Red Boy and touched noses with him. “Please come home with me,” she meowed.

“Sorry, Molly, but no,” said Red Boy. “I could never be happy indoors. You go home, where you belong.”

“I’m glad to have met you, though,” Red Boy continued. “You saved my life and I’ll always remember you.”

They touched noses and Red Boy walked into the shadows. “Come on, Molly,” said her person. “Dinner is waiting.”

THE END

Now about “Red Boy” — his real name is Citrus! He is at a shelter called Rocky Mountain Feline Rescue in Denver, CO… and he has been there since 2008! He is 9 years old and change, and he is a very laid back kind of guy! This gentle kitty is also FIV+, which may explain why he has been at the rescue for so long. Here is Citrus’ adoption page — can you please spread the word about him? He is much loved by the volunteers at Rocky Mountain Feline Rescue, but after 6 years, he really should have his own home!
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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

The Sun Puddle Intruder

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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!

Molly to the Rescue – My Twitter Fiction Story, Part 1

It took three days, 64 Tweets and 1,305 words (not counting hashtags) to tell the story of Molly’s adventure. Since it wound up going on much longer than I had originally thought it would, I’m posting the story here for you non-Twitter users in two parts. Part 2 will run on Wednesday, and that is going to be a very special post! For my fiction, I usually dig up a stock photo or a Creative Commons use photo from Flickr. The two kitties representing Molly and Red Boy are from Flickr, and I’ll have something to say about “Red Boy” that you may want to know! Anyhow, here is Part 1 of my #TwitterFiction story, spaced out as the Tweets were:

Molly to the Rescue

Photo by Everett on Flickr

Molly’s whiskers twitched as she watched the birds dance in the tree outside her living room window.

The blue jays and little brown sparrows were enjoying the early spring’s sun rays as much as Molly was.

The birds sang so invitingly that Molly felt like she could reach out and touch them. So she tried.

To Molly’s surprise, the screen that separated her from the outside pushed open — and she fell!

Molly tumbled paws over tail and landed in the dirt a few feet from the tree. She could hear the birds laughing.

She shook off the dirt and glared at the birds hopping on the branches and flapping their wings at her.

With fire in her eye, Molly charged up the tree. It felt good to watch those smug little birds panic and fly off.

But now that Molly was sitting on a branch not far from the window, the problem was how to get back in?

The screen had not come off when Molly fell, but instead banged back into place. Molly was stuck outside.

She climbed down the tree and sat next to the house siding, wondering what to do. Her person wasn’t home.

Her person was gone most days, at something called “the job,” and she would not be home for hours.

Although she knew it would be no help, Molly trotted to the front door, meowing. Of course, there was no answer.

Not knowing what else to do, Molly wandered down the brick walkway and down the sidewalk, looking for help.

A couple of blocks away, Molly saw two men talking on the other side of a rusty, bent-up chain link fence.

Thinking that maybe the men would help her, Molly climbed through a big hole in the fence and meowed at them.

The taller man looked down on Molly with disgust, and to her surprise he shoved her away with his foot.

“Get out of here, you mangy thing!” the man yelled at her. Shocked by the man’s anger, Molly ran off.

She dashed back through the fence and crouched under a scraggly bush. She did not realize she was being watched.

A voice behind her meowed, “Stay away from those men. They are up to no good.” Molly turned to see a ginger cat.

Molly blinked at her new friend — because indeed he was friendly. “Who are you?” she asked, “and who are they?”

“I don’t have a real name,” said the ginger cat, “but the woman who feeds us at night calls me Red Boy.”

Photo by Rocky Mountain Feline Rescue on Flickr

“What do you mean, us?” asked Molly. “We’re a large group of cats,” said Red Boy. “Community cats, we’re called.”

“A nice lady comes around and feeds us,” Red Boy continued. “The owner of this property told her it was okay.”

Red Boy pointed his nose toward the two men who yelled at Molly. “They work for the owner. And they hate cats.”

“They want to get rid of us, but this is our home,” Red Boy warned. “If you want to live over here, be careful.”

“Oh, but I already have a home,” said Molly. “Except, well, I got out and I’ve gotten kind of lost.”

Red Boy licked Molly on the head. “I hope you find your home. But if you are hungry, you can eat with us.”

“When’s dinner?” asked Molly. “Just after dusk,” Red Boy said. “I’ll make sure the other cats leave you alone.”

Exhausted by the day’s events, Molly curled up under the bush and napped. By the time she woke up, it was dusk.

She stood up, stretched high on her toes and wandered back through the chain link fence, hoping she wasn’t late.

What Molly saw on the other side of the fence made her stop in her paw tracks.

To be continued!

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Having problems with your human or the other cats in your house? As the internet’s “Dear Abby With Claws,” I have answers to many annoying problems in my two award-winning books! Visit my author’s page on Amazon to buy one or both of my awesome Dear Sparkle books!