Amy Fish's Blog, page 4
July 8, 2019
Speech I Gave A Few Weeks Ago When I Had One Minute and Fifty Eight Seconds to Summarize My Upcoming Book
I flew in this morning from Montreal and I have a work deadline tomorrow. I'm the Ombudsman at a University which means I investigate complaints and I have a report due in the morning.
I get on the plane. Ready to work. And the woman in front of me reclines her seat allll the way back. My elbows are up to here. My knees are in my throat. There is no way I can type.
So what do I do now? Do I tell this woman she's in my way? Or is that too pushy?
I'm at a loss for words, which is rare for me. I'm smart. I went to Brandeis. I have a Master's Degree. But you know. No matter how much education any of us has - sometimes we can be unprepared for difficult conversations.
I look around the plane and I see seats completely reclined on my left and on my right. And I know what everyone is thinking.
They are wishing that they had a book they could turn to in these situations. A book that would outline how to ask people to move their seats up but do so in a way that doesn't make anyone uncomfortable.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Good News. I have written that book. "I WANTED FRIES WITH THAT: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need" is about how to speak your mind. I wrote it so that each and every one of us - especially us Jews - will learn how to stand up for ourselves in a calm and peaceful way but assertively so that we can get what we want. If we keep quiet, nothing will ever change. If we speak up, we can change the world. I rote this book because I fundamentally believe that kvetching is the path to Tikkun Olam.
I exaggerated a little bit before. The airplane story isn't from this morning. It's a chapter in my book, and well, do you want to know what happened in the end? (Pause)
Invite me to come speak and I'll tell you the whole story.
I'm Amy Fish, and my books is called "I WANTED FRIES WITH THAT: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need."
I get on the plane. Ready to work. And the woman in front of me reclines her seat allll the way back. My elbows are up to here. My knees are in my throat. There is no way I can type.
So what do I do now? Do I tell this woman she's in my way? Or is that too pushy?
I'm at a loss for words, which is rare for me. I'm smart. I went to Brandeis. I have a Master's Degree. But you know. No matter how much education any of us has - sometimes we can be unprepared for difficult conversations.
I look around the plane and I see seats completely reclined on my left and on my right. And I know what everyone is thinking.
They are wishing that they had a book they could turn to in these situations. A book that would outline how to ask people to move their seats up but do so in a way that doesn't make anyone uncomfortable.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Good News. I have written that book. "I WANTED FRIES WITH THAT: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need" is about how to speak your mind. I wrote it so that each and every one of us - especially us Jews - will learn how to stand up for ourselves in a calm and peaceful way but assertively so that we can get what we want. If we keep quiet, nothing will ever change. If we speak up, we can change the world. I rote this book because I fundamentally believe that kvetching is the path to Tikkun Olam.
I exaggerated a little bit before. The airplane story isn't from this morning. It's a chapter in my book, and well, do you want to know what happened in the end? (Pause)
Invite me to come speak and I'll tell you the whole story.
I'm Amy Fish, and my books is called "I WANTED FRIES WITH THAT: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need."
July 1, 2019
Complaint Sandwich on Brown
Yesterday a friend sent me an article about another complaint expert who suggests using a complaint sandwich when expressing your complaints (click here to read).
Am sensing a link between complaint professionals and sandwiches. This guy (named Guy) is basing his career on a complaint sandwich whereas mine took off following the ordering of a turkey sub.
I believe this is worthy of further investigation:
How a Complaint Sandwich is Like A Turkey Sub
1. Both are practical: Turkey sub is a business transaction type of meal. It may not be fantastic but it's usually edible and sufficiently filling. The complaint sandwich is practical too. It is a way of structuring your message so that you get your point across clearly. The instructions for this technique are easy to follow and clearly laid out.
2. Both are not spicy: I mean I guess you could put sriracha on your turkey sammie but for the most part it's a pretty bland food group. The complaint sandwich is a calm method of communicating as well. There is no heat - no shouting, no temper tantrums, no scathing emails. Calmness is important to keep in mind when you are about to express your complaint.
3. Both are best served fresh: Sometimes when we are complaining to someone, it's tempting to re-hash old beefs. For example: You never empty your recycling. I've talked to you about this a million times. In a complaint sandwich, you stay in the here and now. You are complaining about something that is a current issue. Turkey subs, too, can not be frozen and reheated. They are normally consumed minutes after assembly.
4. Both are best with lean meat: When complaining it is sometimes tempting to pile on the examples but all you really need is one incident to illustrate your point. If you are lean, and just stick to one thing that is driving you crazy at that moment you are more likely to get good results. I am 99% sure that the turkey used in subs is 99% lean.
5. Brown lettuce could be a problem: If your favourite part of the sandwich is the iceberg, and it looks a little brown to you, this could make for a disappointing sub. A complaint sandwich does not contain lettuce so you're probably ok there.
Where You Could Potentially Go Wrong
I don't think a complaint sandwich is edible so pay attention when you are ordering your lunch.
Am sensing a link between complaint professionals and sandwiches. This guy (named Guy) is basing his career on a complaint sandwich whereas mine took off following the ordering of a turkey sub.
I believe this is worthy of further investigation:
How a Complaint Sandwich is Like A Turkey Sub
1. Both are practical: Turkey sub is a business transaction type of meal. It may not be fantastic but it's usually edible and sufficiently filling. The complaint sandwich is practical too. It is a way of structuring your message so that you get your point across clearly. The instructions for this technique are easy to follow and clearly laid out.
2. Both are not spicy: I mean I guess you could put sriracha on your turkey sammie but for the most part it's a pretty bland food group. The complaint sandwich is a calm method of communicating as well. There is no heat - no shouting, no temper tantrums, no scathing emails. Calmness is important to keep in mind when you are about to express your complaint.
3. Both are best served fresh: Sometimes when we are complaining to someone, it's tempting to re-hash old beefs. For example: You never empty your recycling. I've talked to you about this a million times. In a complaint sandwich, you stay in the here and now. You are complaining about something that is a current issue. Turkey subs, too, can not be frozen and reheated. They are normally consumed minutes after assembly.
4. Both are best with lean meat: When complaining it is sometimes tempting to pile on the examples but all you really need is one incident to illustrate your point. If you are lean, and just stick to one thing that is driving you crazy at that moment you are more likely to get good results. I am 99% sure that the turkey used in subs is 99% lean.
5. Brown lettuce could be a problem: If your favourite part of the sandwich is the iceberg, and it looks a little brown to you, this could make for a disappointing sub. A complaint sandwich does not contain lettuce so you're probably ok there.
Where You Could Potentially Go Wrong
I don't think a complaint sandwich is edible so pay attention when you are ordering your lunch.
June 17, 2019
Tastes Like Water
Sitting in Japanese resto pub that we have never been to before waiting for poke bowls that oddly list spinach salad with cashews as key ingredient.Husband asks server about the sake.Husband asks so many questions about the sake that server says. Do You Want to Come in the Back With Me and See the Bottles.Excuse me for a moment. Husband says, delighted.Comes back empty handed and conversation between us resumes. Server brings ice bag to table with blue bottle of sake. Husband pours little cup and is sipping along.Server comes by and says. Is Everything Ok Here.Well. Husband says. This tastes Like Water.Water? I say. Surprised. Let me smell.(I don't drink at all so naturally I have assumed the role of sommelier)Has no smell.I take a sip. Um. I'm no sake connoisseur but I know water. This is water.This IS water. Husband says. I thought it was weird that bottle cap didn't snap or pop when I twisted it.Server says. I took one of the bottles from the display case. I guess someone replaced it with water for display purposes.(Yeah. I guess so.)Let me go get you a fresh bottle.
Lessons Learned:There is a thing about Jesus turning water into wine but clearly he didn't make it to the sake shelf yet.Spinach salad in the poke bowl is innovative, water in the sake bottle is just plain wrong.Sake bottles are known for being colourful and also generally known for containing sake but don't take the last part for granted.
Lessons Learned:There is a thing about Jesus turning water into wine but clearly he didn't make it to the sake shelf yet.Spinach salad in the poke bowl is innovative, water in the sake bottle is just plain wrong.Sake bottles are known for being colourful and also generally known for containing sake but don't take the last part for granted.
June 10, 2019
Love Thy
Warning
I am going to pretend this story happened to me although it did not.
Honour Thy
Today is a Jewish Holiday called Shavuot which commemorates getting the Ten Commandments. It is the same level of holiday as Passover but for some reason never took off much with North American Jews.
Here's why that was a bad call:
Shavuot you eat ice cream, cheesebagels and blintzes, Passover you eat matza, horseradish and balls of boiled fish;Shavuot you give each other flowers and plants, Passover you have to scrub your house from head to toe;Shavuot is two and a half days, Passover lasts over a week; andShavuot you get to stay up all night reading, Passover you have to spill your wine.(As my mother used to say Smart Smart but Dumb Dumb)
Respect ThyWe are building a new deck (not really me I am pretending this is my story this is your last warning) in the back and these projects can be super loud and messy.Workers want to come on the weekend but I say No because neighbours are knee deep in cheesecakecelebrating an important holiday and I don't want to disrespect them with loud deck noise.Workers say I know that matza cracker crunches loud when you eat it but they will still be able to hear themselves spill wine. No no. I say. Not that holiday. This is the one where you exchange tulip bouquets and have giant banana splits. Um sure lady they say. We will halt our work mid deck-build but there is no guarantee that we can come back on Monday. You may have to lose a few days to this so called holiday.I am annoyed but derive some satisfaction from the fact that I am honouring the Lord on this day by respecting my neighbours and hey maybe I'll make a key lime cheesecake later.
Thou Shalt NotShavuot weekend rolls around and I am in the kitchen melting butter to mix with graham cracker crumbs when I see three workers approaching through the back hedge. I guess they got their days confused. I slide open glass door to tell them - Oh. Those are not the same guys that are building my deck. These characters are headed straight to the religious neighbours. Are they looking for a scoop of Oreo banana? Are they hoping to read all night? Are they bringing flowers?No, Nope and Uh-Uh. They are taking out their tool belts.They are hammering and sawing and making lots of noise.They are rebuilding the religious neighbour's deck. On the holiday. Amidst bites of cheesecake.They are using a snowblower to clean up which is blowing inches of dust all over my yard, half-built deck, kitchen window.
Revelation 1. Now I can see why this holiday never took off. Very noisy and too much dust.2. Commandment should be re-written to read: Love thy neighbour as much or slightly less than you love yourself, and don't cancel your deck re-build just to make them happy because they wouldn't do the same for you.
I am going to pretend this story happened to me although it did not.
Honour Thy
Today is a Jewish Holiday called Shavuot which commemorates getting the Ten Commandments. It is the same level of holiday as Passover but for some reason never took off much with North American Jews.
Here's why that was a bad call:
Shavuot you eat ice cream, cheesebagels and blintzes, Passover you eat matza, horseradish and balls of boiled fish;Shavuot you give each other flowers and plants, Passover you have to scrub your house from head to toe;Shavuot is two and a half days, Passover lasts over a week; andShavuot you get to stay up all night reading, Passover you have to spill your wine.(As my mother used to say Smart Smart but Dumb Dumb)
Respect ThyWe are building a new deck (not really me I am pretending this is my story this is your last warning) in the back and these projects can be super loud and messy.Workers want to come on the weekend but I say No because neighbours are knee deep in cheesecakecelebrating an important holiday and I don't want to disrespect them with loud deck noise.Workers say I know that matza cracker crunches loud when you eat it but they will still be able to hear themselves spill wine. No no. I say. Not that holiday. This is the one where you exchange tulip bouquets and have giant banana splits. Um sure lady they say. We will halt our work mid deck-build but there is no guarantee that we can come back on Monday. You may have to lose a few days to this so called holiday.I am annoyed but derive some satisfaction from the fact that I am honouring the Lord on this day by respecting my neighbours and hey maybe I'll make a key lime cheesecake later.
Thou Shalt NotShavuot weekend rolls around and I am in the kitchen melting butter to mix with graham cracker crumbs when I see three workers approaching through the back hedge. I guess they got their days confused. I slide open glass door to tell them - Oh. Those are not the same guys that are building my deck. These characters are headed straight to the religious neighbours. Are they looking for a scoop of Oreo banana? Are they hoping to read all night? Are they bringing flowers?No, Nope and Uh-Uh. They are taking out their tool belts.They are hammering and sawing and making lots of noise.They are rebuilding the religious neighbour's deck. On the holiday. Amidst bites of cheesecake.They are using a snowblower to clean up which is blowing inches of dust all over my yard, half-built deck, kitchen window.
Revelation 1. Now I can see why this holiday never took off. Very noisy and too much dust.2. Commandment should be re-written to read: Love thy neighbour as much or slightly less than you love yourself, and don't cancel your deck re-build just to make them happy because they wouldn't do the same for you.
June 3, 2019
It Happened to Me
Trying to make coffee/drinks date with New Writer Friend when it turns out we both like burritos and there is a burrito shop in my building.
In fact we both like de-constructed burrito bowls which we both order.
We are blah blah blahing away when it turns out there is a little rock in my deconstructed burrito bowl. It's gray and about the size of a tooth.
(It is not a tooth. I checked.)
I get up and bring the deconstructed burrito bowl which is in a mini tin foil pan but imagine a bowl back to the cash. I show the stone to the cashier who also made the food a few minutes earlier.
The only thing I can do for you is give you your money back. He says.
That's all I want. I say. I paid cash.
I remember. He says. And gives me back the nine dollars and forty something cents.
I take my deconstructed back to the table and resume eating.
Q & A:
Q: I always want to complain but some people worry that the chef will spit in their food. How do you avoid this?
A: In this case, the food was in my hands the whole time so there was no spitting risk. Also the kitchen is open so I could see if any bodily fluids were exchanged with my guac. If you are genuinely worried that someone is going to hoark in your food you have the following options:
complain on the way out, after you've finished your meal;only eat at restaurants with open kitchens so that you can see what's what;only order things where spit would immediately show up, for example a steak, and avoid easy camouflage items like fettuccini alfredo; and/ornever complain about anything and resign your self to suboptimal treatment for the rest of your days.Q: How could you finish the dish once you found a rock in it?
A: I was hungry. Also, burrito. Truth is it looked like the kind of rock that you find when you rinse your rice out. For all of you non-rice rinsers, be careful this could happen to you. It looked more like something forgotten than something sinister but I still didn't feel I should have to pay for the meal.
Q: Were you embarrassed to complain in front of someone you barely know?
A: Maybe I should have been, in retrospect, but the truth is it didn't even occur to me. I saw the rock, stood up and dealt with the problem.
Q: You paid almost ten bucks for a burrito?
A: You know, I grapple with this issue a lot. There is controversy regarding privilege (eg, having a job, buying lunch, overspending). At the same time, there is controversy surrounding authenticity (eg, pretending that it's your last dime when in fact you have a whole stack of dimes.) I am not sure what to feel about this, other than to say that I have had varying income levels in my lifetime, I have paid more for a burrito and less for a pair of shoes, and if any of this is insulting or inappropriate I am sorry, that is not my intention.
In fact we both like de-constructed burrito bowls which we both order.
We are blah blah blahing away when it turns out there is a little rock in my deconstructed burrito bowl. It's gray and about the size of a tooth.
(It is not a tooth. I checked.)
I get up and bring the deconstructed burrito bowl which is in a mini tin foil pan but imagine a bowl back to the cash. I show the stone to the cashier who also made the food a few minutes earlier.
The only thing I can do for you is give you your money back. He says.
That's all I want. I say. I paid cash.
I remember. He says. And gives me back the nine dollars and forty something cents.
I take my deconstructed back to the table and resume eating.
Q & A:
Q: I always want to complain but some people worry that the chef will spit in their food. How do you avoid this?
A: In this case, the food was in my hands the whole time so there was no spitting risk. Also the kitchen is open so I could see if any bodily fluids were exchanged with my guac. If you are genuinely worried that someone is going to hoark in your food you have the following options:
complain on the way out, after you've finished your meal;only eat at restaurants with open kitchens so that you can see what's what;only order things where spit would immediately show up, for example a steak, and avoid easy camouflage items like fettuccini alfredo; and/ornever complain about anything and resign your self to suboptimal treatment for the rest of your days.Q: How could you finish the dish once you found a rock in it?
A: I was hungry. Also, burrito. Truth is it looked like the kind of rock that you find when you rinse your rice out. For all of you non-rice rinsers, be careful this could happen to you. It looked more like something forgotten than something sinister but I still didn't feel I should have to pay for the meal.
Q: Were you embarrassed to complain in front of someone you barely know?
A: Maybe I should have been, in retrospect, but the truth is it didn't even occur to me. I saw the rock, stood up and dealt with the problem.
Q: You paid almost ten bucks for a burrito?
A: You know, I grapple with this issue a lot. There is controversy regarding privilege (eg, having a job, buying lunch, overspending). At the same time, there is controversy surrounding authenticity (eg, pretending that it's your last dime when in fact you have a whole stack of dimes.) I am not sure what to feel about this, other than to say that I have had varying income levels in my lifetime, I have paid more for a burrito and less for a pair of shoes, and if any of this is insulting or inappropriate I am sorry, that is not my intention.
May 27, 2019
I Accidentally Ate the Pizza of The Guy Sitting Next to Me
We (me and Husband) are at a Jazz concert/dinner event and are seated at a table for four, with two people we have never seen before in our lives.
At first I thought it was table for four like my favourite Chinese restaurant in Toronto where you may be seated with complete strangers and you ignore each other for the duration of the dinner.
Um, no. It's table for four like at a wedding where you are seated with complete strangers but you are expected to make polite conversation with each other for the duration of the dinner.
You are not expected to accidentally eat the guy next to you's pizza.
(Oops)
It is an intimate little café that appears marginally overwhelmed by the quantity of dinner orders that need fulfillment at the same time.
I order the veggie flatbread pizza with the following in mind:I see it walk by and it looks fineIf the kitchen runs out of oven space they can pop it into the toaster ovenEven if the pizza comes out cold it will still be pizzaVeggies cancel out the cheese and bread (duh)Server comes to the table with curry tofu salad for one of the strangers at our table.
Server then comes directly to me and hands me a pizza.
The pizza has only a few stray peppers on it.
Is this the veggie pizza? I ask.
Yes. Server says.
I take a bite of the pizza. The peppers are hot jalapeño numbers.
I say to Husband. I don't remember there being hot peppers on my pizza. I guess they ran out of mushroom pepper onion and someone in the back said Hey Let's Open A Jar A These.
Reasons why I decide not to complain effectively at this moment:Kitchen is trying their best and I don't want to make matters worse for themI'm there for the music not the food Husband planned this entire date night and am having a good time Don't want to cause a scenePizza is still pizza.Guy sitting next to me says. If you don't like Your Pizza, I can give you some of My Pizza when it comes.
Not only are there jalapeño peppers on the pizza but also some hot red chili numbers.
I'm fine though. It's still pizza.
Approximately twenty three minutes elapse during which Husband receives and eats his burger, Lady finishes her curried tofu and Guy next to me waits for his pizza.
Different Server then comes to the table. She is holding a veggie pizza. Piled high with mushrooms. Yellow peppers. Diced onions.
Tries to serve it to me, but I am sitting in front of a plate of crusts.
Different Server says. This is Your Pizza.
I look under the table to see if there is a trap door that will allow me to escape with minimum embarrassment.
There is not.
Guy next to me says. I think you ate my pizza by mistake.
(Looks like it)
He was hoping for some hot peppers and is not that excited by the crushed mushrooms.
Don't worry. He says. I will go to the kitchen and take care of this.
Which he did.
But I was still SO EMBARRASSED.
Lessons Learned:If you don't complain effectively you might end up accidentally eating your neighbour's pizzaEven people who make their living complaining sometimes take shortcutsThe shortcuts usually backfire so prob better to just politely say "I don't think this is the pizza I ordered"Worst part was when the Guy said What do you Write About and I said Complaining and he said Pretty Ironic.Thankfully we were seated with friendly and understanding people even if we don't share their taste in pizza
At first I thought it was table for four like my favourite Chinese restaurant in Toronto where you may be seated with complete strangers and you ignore each other for the duration of the dinner.
Um, no. It's table for four like at a wedding where you are seated with complete strangers but you are expected to make polite conversation with each other for the duration of the dinner.
You are not expected to accidentally eat the guy next to you's pizza.
(Oops)
It is an intimate little café that appears marginally overwhelmed by the quantity of dinner orders that need fulfillment at the same time.
I order the veggie flatbread pizza with the following in mind:I see it walk by and it looks fineIf the kitchen runs out of oven space they can pop it into the toaster ovenEven if the pizza comes out cold it will still be pizzaVeggies cancel out the cheese and bread (duh)Server comes to the table with curry tofu salad for one of the strangers at our table.
Server then comes directly to me and hands me a pizza.
The pizza has only a few stray peppers on it.
Is this the veggie pizza? I ask.
Yes. Server says.
I take a bite of the pizza. The peppers are hot jalapeño numbers.
I say to Husband. I don't remember there being hot peppers on my pizza. I guess they ran out of mushroom pepper onion and someone in the back said Hey Let's Open A Jar A These.
Reasons why I decide not to complain effectively at this moment:Kitchen is trying their best and I don't want to make matters worse for themI'm there for the music not the food Husband planned this entire date night and am having a good time Don't want to cause a scenePizza is still pizza.Guy sitting next to me says. If you don't like Your Pizza, I can give you some of My Pizza when it comes.
Not only are there jalapeño peppers on the pizza but also some hot red chili numbers.
I'm fine though. It's still pizza.
Approximately twenty three minutes elapse during which Husband receives and eats his burger, Lady finishes her curried tofu and Guy next to me waits for his pizza.
Different Server then comes to the table. She is holding a veggie pizza. Piled high with mushrooms. Yellow peppers. Diced onions.
Tries to serve it to me, but I am sitting in front of a plate of crusts.
Different Server says. This is Your Pizza.
I look under the table to see if there is a trap door that will allow me to escape with minimum embarrassment.
There is not.
Guy next to me says. I think you ate my pizza by mistake.
(Looks like it)
He was hoping for some hot peppers and is not that excited by the crushed mushrooms.
Don't worry. He says. I will go to the kitchen and take care of this.
Which he did.
But I was still SO EMBARRASSED.
Lessons Learned:If you don't complain effectively you might end up accidentally eating your neighbour's pizzaEven people who make their living complaining sometimes take shortcutsThe shortcuts usually backfire so prob better to just politely say "I don't think this is the pizza I ordered"Worst part was when the Guy said What do you Write About and I said Complaining and he said Pretty Ironic.Thankfully we were seated with friendly and understanding people even if we don't share their taste in pizza
May 26, 2019
What's New With Me
1. Last Monday was a holiday here so I didn't post, thank you for your understanding.
2. Here's a link to the piece I wrote for Bliss Magazine about how complaining led me to find my bliss.
3. I also presented at the Jewish Book Council last week, which means I had one minute and fifty eight seconds to present my 256 page book. Click here to read about the JBC. I met representatives from Jewish communities across North America which was amazing, and also got to rub shoulders with some impressive authors and have been ordering books non-stop since I left.
4. People have already started booking me for Fall 2019 speaking engagements which is fantastic and let's face it a big relief. If you are interested in learning about how to be a better complainer, how to deal with people complaining to you, or how to teach your kids to complain for themselves, please let me know and I would be delighted to share some of my insights with you.
2. Here's a link to the piece I wrote for Bliss Magazine about how complaining led me to find my bliss.
3. I also presented at the Jewish Book Council last week, which means I had one minute and fifty eight seconds to present my 256 page book. Click here to read about the JBC. I met representatives from Jewish communities across North America which was amazing, and also got to rub shoulders with some impressive authors and have been ordering books non-stop since I left.
4. People have already started booking me for Fall 2019 speaking engagements which is fantastic and let's face it a big relief. If you are interested in learning about how to be a better complainer, how to deal with people complaining to you, or how to teach your kids to complain for themselves, please let me know and I would be delighted to share some of my insights with you.
May 13, 2019
Mother's Day - Do You Sense a Theme
Mother's Day 2018:Wrote one of my most popular posts ever - about talking to your kids about sex. If you missed it, check it out here.
Mother's Day 2019, Part One:Send husband link to Jewish film festival at local theatre and add the tag line "Mother's Day idea?"Husband writes back "Done.""Done? I was half-joking I can't believe you clicked! How many tickets did you get?"He looks at me like I am bananas. I mean, it's an email so I don't know that for sure. But I sense it."Five." (There are five people in our family.)"We're bringing the kids?" To a documentary. Jewish film festival. At 2pm. On what might be a beautiful sunny day in May. Yikes. We really are pulling the Mother's Day card.
Mother's Day 2019, Part Two:Friday before Mother's Day go out for long overdue lunch with writer friend who writes borderline erotica romance. Her novels are set in Montreal and the third book in her trilogy is coming out in June, called Swap Club 3, check out her and the books here.We exchange Mother's Day plans.She is going for brunch at her mom's house. Vanilla.My Sunday is a little unexpected. Documentary, public, daylight, teenagers."You have to blog about this," she says. "Let's think of a title."
Mother's Day 2019, Minutes Before Departure:"Are you actually serious? We're all going to this? I'm not going.""I can't go Sunday. I have to work.""We're walking there? I'm not walking there. Can't we take the car?"
Mother's Day 2019, Movie Title:Ask Dr. Ruth: Size Doesn't Matter
Lessons Learned:
Even when Mother's Day is fun and goes smoothly there are going to be people who sleep through the movieJewish Film Festival has come a long way since YentlIf you have your children captive on Mother's Day, use the time to promote your own agendaDr. Ruth is as captivating at 90 as she was at 65. Highly recommend the movie.
Mother's Day 2019, Part One:Send husband link to Jewish film festival at local theatre and add the tag line "Mother's Day idea?"Husband writes back "Done.""Done? I was half-joking I can't believe you clicked! How many tickets did you get?"He looks at me like I am bananas. I mean, it's an email so I don't know that for sure. But I sense it."Five." (There are five people in our family.)"We're bringing the kids?" To a documentary. Jewish film festival. At 2pm. On what might be a beautiful sunny day in May. Yikes. We really are pulling the Mother's Day card.
Mother's Day 2019, Part Two:Friday before Mother's Day go out for long overdue lunch with writer friend who writes borderline erotica romance. Her novels are set in Montreal and the third book in her trilogy is coming out in June, called Swap Club 3, check out her and the books here.We exchange Mother's Day plans.She is going for brunch at her mom's house. Vanilla.My Sunday is a little unexpected. Documentary, public, daylight, teenagers."You have to blog about this," she says. "Let's think of a title."
Mother's Day 2019, Minutes Before Departure:"Are you actually serious? We're all going to this? I'm not going.""I can't go Sunday. I have to work.""We're walking there? I'm not walking there. Can't we take the car?"
Mother's Day 2019, Movie Title:Ask Dr. Ruth: Size Doesn't Matter
Lessons Learned:
Even when Mother's Day is fun and goes smoothly there are going to be people who sleep through the movieJewish Film Festival has come a long way since YentlIf you have your children captive on Mother's Day, use the time to promote your own agendaDr. Ruth is as captivating at 90 as she was at 65. Highly recommend the movie.
May 6, 2019
Where's the Beef Might Be A Chicken Salad.
You know how I have a book coming out in Oct?
And
You know how it's called "I Wanted Fries With That: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need"?
And
You know how the title is loosely based on the McDonald's slogan "Do You Want Fries With That?"
And
You know that I live in Montreal which is in Quebec which is mainly French?
Well, Listen To This.
Guess what they were saying in Quebec while the rest of us were saying "Do You Want Fries With That?"
They were saying:
"Un chausson avec ça?" which loosely translates to "Would you like a hand held apple pie with that?"
Observations
1. Luckily poutine was not invented at McDonald's. We would be stuck with apple pie smothered in gravy and cheese.
2. You would think that French fries would be all the rage in a province where almost every one speaks French but instead Quebec was into Apple Pie bringing into question the expression "As American as --"
3. Hang on, Quebec has one word which means hand-held-apple-pie?
4. You can translate something literally but the principle can still be lost.
5. If my book ends up getting translated I'm going to need some new emojis.
And
You know how it's called "I Wanted Fries With That: How to Ask for What You Want and Get What You Need"?
And
You know how the title is loosely based on the McDonald's slogan "Do You Want Fries With That?"
And
You know that I live in Montreal which is in Quebec which is mainly French?
Well, Listen To This.
Guess what they were saying in Quebec while the rest of us were saying "Do You Want Fries With That?"
They were saying:
"Un chausson avec ça?" which loosely translates to "Would you like a hand held apple pie with that?"
Observations
1. Luckily poutine was not invented at McDonald's. We would be stuck with apple pie smothered in gravy and cheese.
2. You would think that French fries would be all the rage in a province where almost every one speaks French but instead Quebec was into Apple Pie bringing into question the expression "As American as --"
3. Hang on, Quebec has one word which means hand-held-apple-pie?
4. You can translate something literally but the principle can still be lost.
5. If my book ends up getting translated I'm going to need some new emojis.
April 29, 2019
Today's Roundup
1. I took last Monday off for Passover/Easter thank you for your understanding.
2. I wrote a piece for Assay Journal about a non-fiction panel I attended. Click here to read.
3. I was interviewed for a Finance Blog, Golden Girl Finance, Click here to read.
4. I posted a blog post this morning but it somehow got dated April 1st, Click here to read.
5. I am just going through the copy edits for my new book, out in Oct and available for pre-order, Click here to order. It's been in the top 50 for motivational books all week (sitting at 42 right now) and it's not even out yet so we have high hopes.
Have a great day and hope to see you next Mon with new material that will be correctly dated (unlike this morning's April 1st piece). I thought April fool's day jokes were supposed to happen on April fools.
2. I wrote a piece for Assay Journal about a non-fiction panel I attended. Click here to read.
3. I was interviewed for a Finance Blog, Golden Girl Finance, Click here to read.
4. I posted a blog post this morning but it somehow got dated April 1st, Click here to read.
5. I am just going through the copy edits for my new book, out in Oct and available for pre-order, Click here to order. It's been in the top 50 for motivational books all week (sitting at 42 right now) and it's not even out yet so we have high hopes.
Have a great day and hope to see you next Mon with new material that will be correctly dated (unlike this morning's April 1st piece). I thought April fool's day jokes were supposed to happen on April fools.
