Evil Editor's Blog, page 397

20-Word Challenge 9

She stared at the drink as if MESMERIZED. Even in the golden rays of the late AFTERNOON SUNLIGHT, it looked unappealing.

"It's blue," she said dubiously.

"It's a delicate TURQUOISE, SHADING towards sapphire," her husband said. "It's very posh. Can't you imagine a U.S. SENATOR drinking it at some EXCLUSIVE RENDEZVOUS?"

"I can imagine what the REPORTERS would say when he keeled over, too." If he was so keen on the stuff, why didn't he try it HIMSELF?

She picked up the glass. The surface seemed SLIC...

20-Word Challenge 8

I WONDERED if the STATELY BOULEVARD BEHIND the IMPRESSIVE BUILDING led to some SECLUDED SUBURBS. INSTEAD it led to a WROUGHT-iron ENTRANCE THROUGH which a very cultured guard COULDN'T let any TRAFFIC pass. I was DETOURED to a full PARKING lot, next to which was ANOTHER NEIGHBORHOOD. I eschewed the paved WALKWAY for the fence and climbed. I finally found him in there, but before I could do justice to the DETAILS of my plot, the guards very politely escorted me away.

--_*Rachel*_(New Beginning 673)

20-Word Challenge 7

Evil Editor's FAVORITE monologue, delivered at a RATTLING pace, was HALFWAY finished for the FIFTEENTH time, when a mysterious man in a PATCHED LEATHER jacket entered the room. The man FLIPPED open a PRECARIOUSLY BALANCED multi-COLORED box and announced in a HORRIBLE, KNOWING voice, "Your BIRTHDAY SANDWICH is here, Sir. We have been PREPARING it all day." WITHOUT LOOKING away from his audience of Evil Minions, Evil Editor SETTLED two twenties, covered with traces of MARKERS, into the man's CR...

20-Word Challenge 6

My STOMACH CHURNED as I ENTERED the school. Possibly it had been a mistake to down six bean burritos for BREAKFAST.

Having DECIDED out of the GOODNESS of my heart to conduct Ms. Applewhite's HOMEROOM, so she WOULDN'T miss her physical therapy session (her SHOULDER having SLIPPED out of joint the previous MORNING), I STEPPED into the CLASSROOM to find the students SITTING, WAITING patiently. This was the OPPOSITE of what I'd expected; I thought I'd at least be pelted with spitballs and BOOGERS....

20-Word Challenge 5

"Dahhhling!" A man with prominent side whiskers slipped his arm through hers. Oddly magnetic, she said, DESCRIBING him later.

"I was DEVASTATED when you CANCELED!" he said. "But here you are after all!"

"Ah yes, we're TOGETHER again!" She smiled sweetly. He must have confused her with someone else. She'd never been in COLUMBUS before. Only a few moments EARLIER, she'd wandered into this OVERCROWDED conference room by ACCIDENT.

"The RELATIVES are just dying to meet the woman I MARRIED."

"...

20-Word Challenge 4

SLIGHTLY demolished cars STREAMED past. Men in WRINKLED CLOTHES, sweaty BREECHES, LEATHER boots, TURBULENT pasts and abandoned DIFFERENCES. Driving in circuits of eight, SHIFTING gears, CROSSING opponents, smashing EXASPERATED, SINGLED-out TRAVELERS in SHOULDER harnesses, getting cheers from boys in EXTENDED OVERCOATS. Cold, chilling the UPSCALE DISTRICT's officials, who ALLOWED havoc. A demolition derby, EE's FAVORITE chaos.

--Dave F. (new Beginning 302)

20-Word Challenge 3

'Let's get PHYSICAL...'

EE TREATED the woman's ear to a nibble. OPERATING his tongue like a lust machine, he ATTACKED the NETWORK of hair over her lobe.

'The THERAPY CONTINUES, LEIUTENANT,' he said, playfully.

'WONDERFUL.'

EE worked the other ear. IDENTICALLY. 'I APPRECIATE how QUICKLY you agreed to this,' he said. 'Not bad for a UNIFICATIONIST GRANDMOTHER.'

The curtain opened with a swish. His SURGEON! His NEUROSURGEON!

EE pushed the nurse away and shrugged. 'I REMEMBERED to take all my vitamins, ...

Saturday Film Series

Face-Lift 686

Guess the Plot

The Trinity Saints

1. Mikey will do anything to make Trinity High School's varsity basketball team - even a little voodoo to ask the loa spirits for their blessing and aid. But as the season ramps up, Mikey finds the spirits increasingly hard to shake. The loa are determined to take Mikey all the way to a championship - whether he wants their help or not.

2. It should have been a dream job for one of Satan's minions: night warden in the eerie and oppressive library at Dublin's Tri...

Cartoon 494

Caption: Voter/anon.

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