Barbara Schmidt's Blog, page 2

One of My Favorite Practices for the Holiday Season

Dear friends,

As we officially begin the holiday season, and the countdown to the end of the year, it’s common for emotions and unchecked feelings to rise to the surface. There is so much happening, there is so much being asked of us, and there are so many expectations and responsibilities. 

While in theory the holiday season is for merriment and joy, the reality is that oftentimes we end up feeling stressed, burned-out, and isolated. The complicated family dynamics can make us feel misunderstood, the never-ending invitations can lead us into people-pleasing, and the simple fact that life is hard, and the world feels extra cruel can lend to us not even wanting to celebrate anything at all.

This week, it is my intention to offer up a simple practice with the hope of helping you maneuver through the holiday season, and the rest of 2023, no matter what you’re going through. I know that there is no quick-fix, one-size-fits-all solution to our life’s problems, but I also know that self-connection, introspection, and simple presence is always a great place to start.

If you’re reeling with anxiety over all the possibility of the too-personal questions to be asked at the family dinner table, or even feeling resentment that you can’t just say no and do the things you actually want to do, the very best way (in my opinion) to feel and release these feelings is through journaling.

As I’ve said in other blogs, journaling is the practice of giving your thoughts a home. Think about it this way: when you have a list of tasks you must complete, you write them down, otherwise the tasks ruminate in your head because you just don’t want to forget to do it. Putting your list onto a page gives it somewhere to live, releasing your mind from holding on so tight. 

In my experience, journaling produces the exact same result. If there are feelings that I can’t quite shake, or thoughts that pop up at inconvenient times, putting pen to paper and giving them a home helps to give me mental clarity and space. 

I invite you this holiday season, and for the last few weeks of 2023, to turn to journaling when everything feels like it’s just too much. Use your journal as a safe haven to say all the things you wish you could say out loud, feel all the feelings that are just beneath the surface, and uncover your innermost wishes and desires. 

There is always so much magic created when we place importance on our own self-care. I hope this practice serves you whenever you need it most.

xo, Michelle

The post One of My Favorite Practices for the Holiday Season appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

My One Favorite Practice for Clarity and Self-Discovery

Hi my friends,

Lately, in conversations with friends, I’ve found myself commenting often about the passage of time, and how elusive time feels, and even how time is slipping by at such a fast pace. To be honest, it’s felt hard for my mind to comprehend it all.

In the so called “normal times”, I often feel extra reflective when the seasons change, and as we start to ease out of Summer and into Fall, there’s so much that comes up for me regarding time: my relationship to it, how I want to spend it, where I’m wasting it, and and how it all makes me feel.

Whenever I catch myself in these reflective, but also uncertain loops, I know that it’s a signal for me to tap into my own clarity, intuition, and purpose. With so much happening in the world around us, I know that when I become still, the answers that I need are always here within me.

Journaling is the practice for me, that helps me to connect when I feel disconnected, uncover hidden truths, find direction when feeling lost, and remember what’s important when it all feels so confusing.

Journaling is the practice that soothes my soul, taps in to my intuition, and helps me to release anxious thoughts and worries.

Journaling is the practice of giving your thoughts a home.

Studies show that we have over 60,000 thoughts a day, many of them repetitive, and most of them negative in nature (that statistic alone makes me feel overwhelmed and confused). When we do not find a productive and tangible place for the negative thoughts, either in action or in practice, our mind will hold on to them tightly, and they will repeat as often as possible.

The practice of being cognizant and mindful of what you’re thinking, when you’re thinking it, and releasing it onto another medium, can bring a sense of clarity and newly found meaning.

Releasing your thoughts onto paper allows your mind to let go of the tightly held grasp of your thoughts. It puts your anxious mind at ease, knowing that you’ve acknowledged the thought, and you’ll take appropriate action with it.

Every night, I spend a few moments before bed, reflecting on my day. I put my pen to paper and allowing whatever thoughts arise to flow out of my mind, without attaching too much meaning or judgment on what comes out. Often times, the thoughts that come are the ones that I know are taking up too much space and not serving me. They’re the repetitive, negative ones, that hold me back and make me feel small.

Giving these thoughts a home allows me to create the mental space to clearly hold the vision of the hopes and desires that I wish for my life. It’s like skimming the top layer off, so that you can get to the goodness that lies just beneath the surface.

Which is why I love this practice so much. Journaling meets me where I am, allows me to be messy and authentic, and guides me to the truth, wherever it may be hidden, in any given day. It’s the perfect practice to encapsulate who I am in this moment, and to propel me to become who I wish to be.

I’m sending you lots of love in your own journey to self-discovery!

xo, Michelle

P.S. I have some exciting news! I am launching a journaling experience designed for anyone who wants to start journaling or for avid journalers who would like some new ideas and inspiration. Sign-up to be the first to pre-orderHERE

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Practices for Managing Difficult Times

Dear friends,

People often ask me,  “Michelle, please give me one thing that I can do to deal with all the stress I’m feeling in the difficult times happening all around me.”

My answer is clear and simple really, “Make sure you have a practice that connects you inside to your heart and body. Otherwise you will be at the mercy of this fast-paced, always changing environment.”

Right now we are in an incredibly interesting time. We are experiencing a lot of change, uncertainty and suffering. We are experiencing separation, anger, and divisiveness. We are experiencing this on a worldly level and I believe even on a personal scale.

I hear from so many people every day who are struggling and hurting. I hear from many people who are scared and feeling helpless. I hear from a lot of people who are feeling angry, unseen, and unheard all across our globe.

My sweet friends I hear you and I honor you. All feelings, even the difficult or uncomfortable ones are valid and important.

What is important to remember is that life is not stagnant. Life is filled with peaks and valleys, the highs and the lows. We, as humans, will always experience difficulty on our way to our happy destination. We can never truly rid ourselves of the difficulties or the negative, but we can choose how we maneuver the times. We can be the greatest surfers in these waves of life. When we pass the tests of difficulty with grace, we build up our stamina and capability to process future challenges with a greater sense of ease.

If you are experiencing uncertainty and unease I have my simple practices, my favorite “pick-me ups” to share here in helping you through, I hope they serve you as well as they have me.

Remember that no feelings are permanent, this too shall pass, and there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. For right now focus on the light shining on your first step.

1. Meditate. I always recommend this one in my blogs, and I hope you take this as a sign of how important I really feel a meditation practice is for you. Since I adopted a daily meditation practice, I find that I am able to handle life’s curveballs much easier. I am not saying I don’t have bad days, or difficult situations don’t come my way, I simply find that I have a deep sense of trust and peace that helps me process what life puts in my path. It’s easy to meditate when life is going great. It can feel more difficult to get to your meditation cushion when challenge arises. Make an effort to sit with yourself daily. Connect with yourself. When you are aligned with you, you can take on anything. You are unshakeable.

2. Move. There are times when I have been in slumps or hard situations and my first instinct was to curl up and hide from the world. While that might be comforting in the moment, the stagnation of our bodies makes us feel “frozen in time” to the situation at hand. Incorporating gentle physical activity can be a wonderful way to release stress and tension, and it will get your thoughts flowing in the direction of the solutions you seek.

3. Allow yourself to feel. Many times when uncomfortable feelings arise, we try to push it away to avoid the difficulty and pain. While it can be a true challenge to allow ourselves to feel the sadness, anger, and frustration, it is important to actually allow these feelings to process. A great way to let the feelings out is journaling. Allow yourself to sit and put pen to paper. Let the words come, try not to judge what comes out, and let the inner workings of your soul come through. When you feel your feelings fully you create space for them to pass through you and you become free.

4. Be grateful. In stressful times we can lose sight of this great truth, there is always something to be grateful for. Counting our blessings, especially in strife, is an excellent way to lift your spirits and create space for the good things that are undoubtedly coming. Take time daily to write down at least one thing that you are grateful for. It could be as simple as the air you breathe or a delicious meal. Find joy in the simple things. Be grateful for what you do have, even when you are feeling like there is so much that you don’t have.

5. Be helpful. One of the greatest ways to get yourself out of a slump is to be of service to someone or something. We feel better when we help others; this is a simple, yet powerful truth. I often think of this quote by Aung San Suu Kyi in difficult times, “When you’re feeling helpless, help someone.”  Find ways to be of service that are aligned with your passions and interests. Where would you like to make an impact in this world? Take the first step to and you not only will be making a difference you will feel empowered.

I deeply hope these practices, my tools help you. Remember you are strong, valuable, and loved. I would love to know in the comments what you rely on in difficult times.

xoxo, Michelle

Loved this blog? Read more here:

5 Affirmations for Managing Difficult Times

The Importance of Gratitude in Difficult Times

5 Reminders When Faced With Difficulty

The post Practices for Managing Difficult Times appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

10 Simple Ways to Make Someone’s Day

Hi my dear friends,

These days it feels like we are perpetually living in tense and uncertain times. It’s quite common for me to witness confrontation and anger when I leave my house. So many of us are feeling burned out, overwhelmed, overstretched, and simply exhausted.

This week, I just want to remind you all that if you are feeling any of these feelings, it is completely normal. These are not normal times, and thus our mental and physical reactions to it all will feel uncomfortable and unsettling. But the truth is your feelings are always valid no matter what.

I, myself, have been struggling more than usual lately, and rather than being hard on myself for it, I remind myself that no feeling is ever final, and even this, too shall pass.

One of my favorite ways to lift my own spirits is to help lift the spirits of another. Kindness costs nothing, and it often means everything, especially during this season of life.

Here are my favorite ways to spread love and kindness these days:

Being fully present in conversations with other people. By looking people in the eye, and being fully engaged in your interactions, people will feel your care and consideration.Being extra patient with others and allowing extra time for long lines and extra wait times.Sending a loving message, text, or email, just because.Running an errand or completing a task for a loved one who is truly overstretched.Communicating your needs with the people around you, and allowing them to do the same with you.Honoring your boundaries that make you feel safe and whole, and doing the same with others.Releasing judgments for how other people choose to live their lives, and wish them well from afar.Buying a coffee for the person behind you in line, or chipping in for a gift fund for someone who is experiencing financial hardship.Showing and expressing your appreciation and gratitude for the people around you, especially service workers, healthcare workers, and retail employees.Taking care of, and honoring your needs, so that you have the energy and the space to show up for others when called to do so.

Sending you all so much love this week and always,

xo, Michelle

Read more blogs like this one here:

10 Reminders for Effective Communication

The Importance of Gratitude in Difficult Times

A Reminder for Managing Overwhelm

The post 10 Simple Ways to Make Someone’s Day appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

5 Ways I’m Breaking Generational Cycles

My dear friends,

Recently, I was having a conversation with one of my colleagues about the topic of ‘cycle breaking’. I hadn’t actually heard the term before, but as someone who researches and studies psychology, my colleague described to me the concept that a cycle breaker is someone who is able to identity toxic patterns and cycles that have been passed down by family, and conscientiously decides to create new patterns.

As someone who has been in therapy most of my life unraveling my own family dysfunction and difficulty, this made so much sense to me. I’ve often discussed in my own therapy sessions the concept of healing with the intention of being the last person in my lineage to carry certain family traumas.

Our families, or the people we spend our growing up years surrounded by, are the first ones to truly influence us, mold us, and shape us. In our formative times, we pick can up on toxic traits and dysfunctional patterns as a way of coping, surviving, and being cared for.

I know that every person has their own set of difficulties to unravel and heal, however, this week, I wanted to share five ways I’m hoping to break my own family cycles, with the desire that they inspire you on your journey as well.

Committing to therapy and personal development as a lifelong commitment. Therapy has helped me to identify and break down blocks and patterns that keep me stuck in familial loops. Investing in myself, my mental health, and my family’s well-being will always be a priority to me.Learning how to set healthy boundaries. Knowing what you will and will not tolerate in your life is the first step, and communicating what you need in a kind way is just as important. The art of boundary setting requires mindful, skillful communication and respect. Also remember that boundaries are a two-way street, respect the boundaries that others set as well.Not taking other people’s actions personally. It’s important to remember that other peoples words and deeds say nothing about who you are and everything about who they are. The more I remember to not take things personally, the less reactive, judgmental, and angry I feel.Taking a pause before reacting in stressful situations. There’s so much I’d wish I could take back from times that I’ve reacted too quickly and said or did something I didn’t mean. There is so much power in the pause, and with that power, comes confidence and healing.Being kind and loving to myself, and releasing perfectionism and the need to people please. I know that I’m my best self when I care for myself fully and completely. When I show up to life from this healed and happy place, that’s when I notice powerful familial shifts.

What are some ways you’ve noticed yourself being a cycle breaker? Let me know in the comments!

xo, Michelle

 

Liked this blog? Read more here:

A Powerful Practice to Shift Your Relationships

Reconnecting With What We Value

Managing Feelings During the Holidays

The post 5 Ways I’m Breaking Generational Cycles appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

5 Affirmations for Managing Difficult Times

Dear friends,

As we all know, life is difficult. I don’t say this to be negative or doom and gloom, but rather just to say the truth. Life presents us difficulty and hardship, and though we try to avoid it, it’s simply part of life.

I know we are all emotionally impacted by the conflicts we see unfolding around the world. There is so much heartache and sorrow, and it’s easy to let our emotions get the best of us.

It can feel really challenging when we are continuously bogged down in the “negative” to find the glimmers of hope and positivity. We never know what life will throw our way, and in these turbulent times, it feels like life is really throwing us a lot of difficulty to handle.

I love to provide practical tools that can actually help you feel better. I would love for you to feel at least 1% better this week. And knowing that I cannot control anything that happens externally in this world, I know that we can start to feel the tiny percentages uptick when we go deeper within.

As we know, the thoughts that we repeatedly tell ourselves shape our reality. We, ourselves, can influence how we view the world, how we react to the world, and how we show up in the world, we just have to create the space to allow ourselves to choose thoughts that are in alignment with our highest ideals.

You most likely know, one of my favorite practices to bring my mind back to equilibrium is to repeat positive affirmations. I have truly been relying heavily on my affirmations to propel me through the difficult moments. Though the repetitions don’t change a situation or circumstance, they do re-frame, ultimately change how I view things.

Affirmations shift my mood. They attract the positive thoughts that move me into a happier, more productive place. And feeling more upbeat and motivated is good for all of us.

Today, I’m sharing a few of the affirmations that have been serving me, you can find them below, and I encourage you to come up with ones that really resonate with you. When you speak them to yourself, I hope you can believe them, feel them deep in your soul, and even if they don’t ring 100% true for you in this moment, allow them to serve as a guide point, a goal, or something to look forward to, knowing that this repetitive practice will bring you the ultimate result you deeply desire.

I love my resiliency and my adaptability (This is one of those “goal” affirmations. I feel it about 50% and the repetition allows me to act as if!)

I am strong, confident, and capable

I take everything one moment at a time

I am loved, supported, and cared for always (I love to repeat this affirmation in moments where I feel a lack in love, support, and care, because even if I feel unloved and abandoned, reminding myself that above all else, I am here for me, always gives me comfort and relief).

I am doing my best, and my best is always enough

If you feel called, I’d love to hear what affirmations you’re using to bring some happiness, positivity, and calm into your lives, during stressful days. Share your inspiration in the comments below.

xo, Michelle

Read more blogs like this one:

The Importance of Gratitude in Difficult Times

7 Tips For Dealing with Difficult People

5 Reminders When Faced With Difficulty

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Living Life in Balance

Many of my blogs stem from occurrences or situations that happen in my own life. I feel like the lessons and teachings I learn can often apply to many of you. Over the past few weeks, I have been getting the same lesson over and over again. Live your life in balance. We hear the word balance all the time, and in every different arena of life. When it comes down to it, balance, in all areas of life, is super important.

What does living in balance even mean? Well, in my opinion, it’s different for everyone, and something that each of us has to figure out for ourselves. To me, balance means moderation, it means finding the middle path, and ultimately it means letting go of being perfect. When we get on our spiritual paths we tend to go all in, leading to rigidity and perfectionism. So this week I thought I’d share with you my views on balance, how I obtain my own sense of “balance,” and what you can do for yourselves to find that middle way that works just right for you.

1. Balance in health and wellness. Find a routine that works for you, that makes you feel good, that lifts you up, but don’t be too hard on yourself in adhering to this schedule. Make sure you eat foods that work for you, move your body in a way that makes you feel alive, and get plenty of sleep!
2. Moderation with your social life. We are social beings, and so we like to constantly be with people. This is great, especially when with people that lift you up and make your heart smile! Find these people and make them your tribe, but also take some time for yourself. You are your own travel companion in this life, so cultivate that great relationship with yourself and learn to love times of solitude.
3. Find the middle path with your emotions and your spiritual practices. Life is amazing when you go inward, find that spiritual path and adhere to guidelines to keep you centered, but also, life is about having fun. We are meant to experience all arrays of emotions, so make sure you allow for it! Cut yourself some slack every now and again, break your own rules, and just go to what brings you joy. As long as you consistently follow your heart and inner guide, you will always be brought back to your center, back to your path in life.

What do you do to find a sense of balance in your life? Let me know!

The post Living Life in Balance appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

Reconnecting With What We Value

Dear friends,

In many of my blogs, I talk about how we can uncover, build, and sustain deep, meaningful foundations for our lives. I fully believe in the power of establishing a strong relationship with ourselves, bringing positive and helpful practices in to our daily routines, and being mindful of our thoughts and actions day in and day out.

It’s this inner work that I feel extends into our outward reality, helping to navigate us through this winding, difficult and often times confusing life.

One of the most enriching, and clarifying practices that I now cultivate in my life, is to understand and tap into what I value.

I remember so often as a little girl in school, I would hear teachers and mentors talk about family values or religious values or school values, like a rule of law that was to be followed, but really never understood. Values always seemed like they were placed upon me, rather than unearthed from within me.

In no surprise, those forced upon values didn’t seem to stick, and I began to notice as I got older that I didn’t really know what I valued, or what I stood for. I was always outwardly searching for what mattered to me, going with the grain, rather than taking a moment to check in with me to feel what was aligned.

Tapping into our inner values, is a huge step towards self-realization, to understanding, to confidence, and to a deep knowing of direction and purpose. Values are the cornerstones of our lives, they shape our beliefs, transform our thoughts, and heavily influence our words and actions.

I think sometimes we forget that we have the power to choose what we value, and we can amass the bravery to speak and act in alignment with those values. It’s an empowering and freeing reminder that I know we could all stand to hear in these times that we live in.

If, like me, you grew up with a set of values placed upon you, and feel a bit confused about how to tap in and uncover what is right for you, know that having the awareness and the desire is always the first step. Establishing the connection within, helps you to learn more about yourself, the person living your life, and how you want to live it, and it’s such a beautiful practice.

My favorite, and probably one of the simpler ways to uncover truths that live inside all of us, is to simply ask the important questions.

Sitting quietly, with a journal, slowly ask yourself these questions. Without overthinking or overanalyzing, write down what answers come to mind, and free write the responses.

Who am I?

What do I really want?

What do I value?

What impact do I wish to have on the world?

What are the aligned actions I can take that bring me closer to what I desire?

Whenever I take part in this practice, I always learn something new about myself, and it is so rewarding. In establishing and truly understanding what I, Michelle, value in this life, I have felt such a feeling of freedom, confidence, clarity, and peace; and I wish that deeply for all of you.

xo,

Michelle

If you liked this post, read more here:

Connecting With Our Values

How I Learned to Belong

My Favorite Practice for Connecting with Myself

The post Reconnecting With What We Value appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

Reconnecting With What We value

I know in many of my blogs, I talk about how we can uncover, build, and sustain deep, meaningful foundations for our lives. I fully believe in the power of establishing a strong relationship with ourselves, bringing positive and helpful practices in to our daily routines, and being mindful of our thoughts and actions day in and day out. It’s this inner work that I feel extends into our outward reality, helping to navigate us through this winding, difficult and often times confusing life.

One of the most enriching, and clarifying practices that I now cultivate in my life, is to understand and tap into what I value. I remember so often as a little girl in school, I would hear teachers and mentors talk about family values or religious values or school values, like a rule of law that was to be followed, but really never understood. Values always seemed like they were placed upon me, rather than unearthed from within me.

In no surprise, those forced upon values didn’t seem to stick, and I began to notice as I got older that I didn’t really know what I valued, or what I stood for. I was always outwardly searching for what mattered to me, going with the grain, rather than taking a moment to check in with me to feel what was aligned.

Tapping into our inner values, is a huge step towards self-realization, to understanding, to confidence, and to a deep knowing of direction and purpose. Values are the cornerstones of our lives, they shape our beliefs, transform our thoughts, and heavily influence our words and actions.

I think sometimes we forget that we have the power to choose what we value, and we can amass the bravery to speak and act in alignment with those values. It’s an empowering and freeing reminder that I know we could all stand to hear in these times that we live in.

If, like me, you grew up with a set of values placed upon you, and feel a bit confused about how to tap in and uncover what is right for you, know that having the awareness and the desire is always the first step. Establishing the connection within, helps you to learn more about yourself, the person living your life, and how you want to live it, and it’s such a beautiful practice.

My favorite, and probably one of the simpler ways to uncover truths that live inside all of us, is to simply ask the important questions.

Sitting quietly, with a journal, slowly ask yourself these questions. Without overthinking or overanalyzing, write down what answers come to mind, and free write the responses.

Who am I?

What do I really want?

What do I value?

What impact do I wish to have on the world?

What are the aligned actions I can take that bring me closer to what I desire?

Whenever I take part in this practice, I always learn something new about myself, and it is so rewarding. In establishing and truly understanding what I, Michelle, value in this life, I have felt such a feeling of freedom, confidence, clarity, and peace; and I wish that deeply for all of you.

xo,

Michelle

If you liked this post, read more here:

Connecting With Our Values

How I Learned to Belong

My Favorite Practice for Connecting with Myself

The post Reconnecting With What We value appeared first on Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life.

A Gentle Reminder About Relationships

Dear friends,

I have a feeling this week’s blog topic will resonate with many of you. I was recently reflecting on life and change and the feelings that come along with it. I had a bit of an epiphany while sorting through my feelings and wanted to share with you all.

If you’re reading this blog, I know that you care about personal development and living an aligned, peaceful life. You want to work on yourself and make yourself “better”. What I’ve noticed lately within myself is that, in my quest for personal development I tend to hold myself to perfectionistic standards, oftentimes leaving very little room for grace or nuance.

Can you relate?

What I wanted to share with you this week, is a gentle reminder to let yourself off the hook for being perfect in an imperfect world. Which means, you are allowed to have complicated feelings about complicated situations.

As you may have noticed, I’ve had a lot of intense, personal changes happening in my life over the past year. And as I’ve been doing my best to manage my emotions, be mindful of my actions, and heal from deep hurt and disappointment, I am not perfect.

I’ve noticed the swing from feeling angry to sad, disappointed to hopeful, and bitter to forgiving.

For so long I felt that I had to hold myself to a straight line of feeling; that I had to pick a lane and stick to it; that I couldn’t veer off course. And that is what I wish to remind you of this week: that life is not linear, it is not a straight line to healing and resolution.

We are allowed to have complicated feelings, wavering feelings, changing feelings in a complicated, wavering, and ever changing world. Life is not black and white, as much as we’d like for it to be that way. Life is gray, and somehow we have to find a way to live life in that middle path where we can find grace, acceptance, and understanding for our own humanity.

I’d also like to remind you that you are not a failure because of failed relationships.

I truly believe that people come into your life for a reason or a season. Not all relationships are meant to go the distance, and it is totally okay to move on from the relationships in your life that no longer feel aligned. It’s okay to let go.

If you’re someone who is healing and reeling from life’s challenges and difficulties, I invite you to join me in going easy on yourself and your feelings that arise during this time. You do not have to maneuver through life perfectly, and trying to do so will only bring us more heartache and disappointment.

All we can do each day is show up as our best, most aligned selves, take our best, most aligned actions, and know that life is messy, and that’s okay.

xo, Michelle

If you liked this post, read more here:

5 Lessons I’ve Learned From My Mom

A Powerful Practice to Shift Your Relationships

What Love Means To Me

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