Kevin Lucia's Blog, page 51
December 14, 2011
A Cold, Hard Truth.....
....is this: people have been very kind and complimented me on how early I get up every morning and write. They remark on my consistency and dedication, tell me how much they admire that, and because of this, I'm bound to be a success someday. That sounds all nice and everything, but the cold hard truth is this:
That's not necessarily true.
At all.
Because I'm guaranteed nothing in the publishing business, am I? Getting up every day at 3 AM doesn't guarantee that my writing career will continue, or improve. It doesn't guarantee that I'll get better, even. It doesn't guarantee anything except the following things:
1. that I'll write a lot of words in a year
2. that I'll have done my very best
Not being pessimistic or cynical, here, just trying to have an adequate grasp of the facts. See, even though every writer should search out their favorite writer and read their biographies or memories on writing, there's a real danger of filling our heads with their stories, assuming that if we suffer and write and persevere like they did, then we, too, can succeed and be just like them.
And that, of course, is patently false.
See, I'm the sorta person that believes in two things:
1. some things are either meant to be, or they aren't
2. even though writers can learn and improve and become better, I do - even though this may be an unpopular belief - think it's a gift. Some people "have it". Others don't.
I draw my beliefs concerning #2 from my basketball career. Once upon a time, I loved basketball more than anything else. Lived, ate, drank, breathed, slept with basketball. And I worked hard, every single day. And I did enjoy moderate success, fulfilling enough in it's own way at the Junior College and DIII level.
But, no matter how hard I worked, there were two things I'd never get around:
1. I was only 6'3
2. I was kinda slow, couldn't really jump, and was only an average shooter
So it's the same with writing. I've been doing this early morning thing for 5-6 years, and I plan on continuing it for the foreseeable future. And I've made some progress, done a few things. But the cold hard fact of the matter is this: I could very well never see anything published, ever again. And maybe I'm only an average writer and storyteller, and that's all I'll ever be.
And I've faced that fact.
Accepted it.
And I'm still going to get up and write, every day. For now. Will there be a time when I'll have to decide to continue or not? Really, seriously contemplate hanging it up? Possibly.
But not anytime soon.
That's not necessarily true.
At all.
Because I'm guaranteed nothing in the publishing business, am I? Getting up every day at 3 AM doesn't guarantee that my writing career will continue, or improve. It doesn't guarantee that I'll get better, even. It doesn't guarantee anything except the following things:
1. that I'll write a lot of words in a year
2. that I'll have done my very best
Not being pessimistic or cynical, here, just trying to have an adequate grasp of the facts. See, even though every writer should search out their favorite writer and read their biographies or memories on writing, there's a real danger of filling our heads with their stories, assuming that if we suffer and write and persevere like they did, then we, too, can succeed and be just like them.
And that, of course, is patently false.
See, I'm the sorta person that believes in two things:
1. some things are either meant to be, or they aren't
2. even though writers can learn and improve and become better, I do - even though this may be an unpopular belief - think it's a gift. Some people "have it". Others don't.
I draw my beliefs concerning #2 from my basketball career. Once upon a time, I loved basketball more than anything else. Lived, ate, drank, breathed, slept with basketball. And I worked hard, every single day. And I did enjoy moderate success, fulfilling enough in it's own way at the Junior College and DIII level.
But, no matter how hard I worked, there were two things I'd never get around:
1. I was only 6'3
2. I was kinda slow, couldn't really jump, and was only an average shooter
So it's the same with writing. I've been doing this early morning thing for 5-6 years, and I plan on continuing it for the foreseeable future. And I've made some progress, done a few things. But the cold hard fact of the matter is this: I could very well never see anything published, ever again. And maybe I'm only an average writer and storyteller, and that's all I'll ever be.
And I've faced that fact.
Accepted it.
And I'm still going to get up and write, every day. For now. Will there be a time when I'll have to decide to continue or not? Really, seriously contemplate hanging it up? Possibly.
But not anytime soon.
December 13, 2011
I'm tired, but....
...but I'm up. Luckily, I'm in the editing/typing phase, which is much easier to do this early in the morning. I won't have to actually "write" from a blank slate for quite some time, which is good. Got a lot of typing to do before then.
Which is the part of the writing process I like the most, actually. The initial writing is a very ambivalent sort of thing. It's in my head and I have to get it down or I'll go nuts - I have to write SOMETHING every day, or I'll go nuts - but I don't always LIKE what I write. Lots of times, those first handwritten drafts are just meh.
But when I start editing my work, stripping away all the fat and finding the story inside, THAT's when I really get a kick out of it. When I really enjoy what I'm doing, when I really feel like a writer.
Of course, the morning has become "my time" now, period. After getting up this early for about 5 or 6 years, I can't write past 11 AM in the morning. As weird as it sounds, it's gotta be written before then, or it's not happening.
Anyway. Just some tired ramblings before I scarf some food down and get to work....
Which is the part of the writing process I like the most, actually. The initial writing is a very ambivalent sort of thing. It's in my head and I have to get it down or I'll go nuts - I have to write SOMETHING every day, or I'll go nuts - but I don't always LIKE what I write. Lots of times, those first handwritten drafts are just meh.
But when I start editing my work, stripping away all the fat and finding the story inside, THAT's when I really get a kick out of it. When I really enjoy what I'm doing, when I really feel like a writer.
Of course, the morning has become "my time" now, period. After getting up this early for about 5 or 6 years, I can't write past 11 AM in the morning. As weird as it sounds, it's gotta be written before then, or it's not happening.
Anyway. Just some tired ramblings before I scarf some food down and get to work....
December 12, 2011
Books I've Recently Read
Haven't done this in awhile, but here's a gander at what I've been reading lately, or what I just finished recently. I'll number them 1-6 across and then down, starting with Saguaro Riptide, by Norman Partridge.
Kevin's bookshelf: read
More of Kevin's books »I
1. Saguaro Riptide, by Norman Partridge - I read a review once that said this about Ray Bradbury: "a style often imitated, never duplicated." The same applies to Norm Partridge. Sure, you could try and write tight, mean, compact prose - but would it have the same punch? The same kick? Probably not.
This one is right up there with his best. Smooth and fast and tasty, what's not to love about an ex-heavyweight champion mixing it up with a kung-fu kicking woman sheriff named Wyetta Earp? Throw in a mean, shot-gun toting Elvis impersonator, G. I. Jane and a Muslim hitman, and you've got one heckuva fine tasting noir stew on boil.
2. Headstone City, by Tom Piccirilli. My first Tom Pic novel, and I loved it. Also a nice smooth read, the crime/noir/mobster/supernatural mix was a fine treat. I mean, mobsters gotta have ghosts too, right?
3. Fatal Error: A Repairman Jack Novel, by F. Paul Wilson. Drawing toward the end of this series, and like I was with The Dark Tower (Stephen King), I can't wait to see how it all plays out, but don't want it to end. Jack is drawing closer to the ultimate showdown, and even though the series ends with titles like The Dark at The End and Nightworld, I hope Jack still gets to kick Rasalom's head in.
4. Dark Trail, by Ed Gorman. I've only recently dipped into Westerns - in working on my own Western project - but Ed Gorman has become a new favorite. Easy to read prose that flows and also enjoys moments of subtle lyricism, Ed's wild west is very real. And quick and violent and often full of gunplay, too. This was a Leo Guild novel, a character I've grown fond of.
5. Billy the Kid: Endless Ride. Another Billy the Kid biography, the best I've read so far. I particularly liked how it delved into the Kid's childhood and adolescence. Gave me lots of material to work with.
6. Guild, by Ed Gorman. Ditto on what I already said about Gorman's prose, and a new character for me to follow: bounty hunter Leo Guild. Don't know if he's written any more of these, but I hope so.
Kevin's bookshelf: read
More of Kevin's books »I
1. Saguaro Riptide, by Norman Partridge - I read a review once that said this about Ray Bradbury: "a style often imitated, never duplicated." The same applies to Norm Partridge. Sure, you could try and write tight, mean, compact prose - but would it have the same punch? The same kick? Probably not.
This one is right up there with his best. Smooth and fast and tasty, what's not to love about an ex-heavyweight champion mixing it up with a kung-fu kicking woman sheriff named Wyetta Earp? Throw in a mean, shot-gun toting Elvis impersonator, G. I. Jane and a Muslim hitman, and you've got one heckuva fine tasting noir stew on boil.
2. Headstone City, by Tom Piccirilli. My first Tom Pic novel, and I loved it. Also a nice smooth read, the crime/noir/mobster/supernatural mix was a fine treat. I mean, mobsters gotta have ghosts too, right?
3. Fatal Error: A Repairman Jack Novel, by F. Paul Wilson. Drawing toward the end of this series, and like I was with The Dark Tower (Stephen King), I can't wait to see how it all plays out, but don't want it to end. Jack is drawing closer to the ultimate showdown, and even though the series ends with titles like The Dark at The End and Nightworld, I hope Jack still gets to kick Rasalom's head in.
4. Dark Trail, by Ed Gorman. I've only recently dipped into Westerns - in working on my own Western project - but Ed Gorman has become a new favorite. Easy to read prose that flows and also enjoys moments of subtle lyricism, Ed's wild west is very real. And quick and violent and often full of gunplay, too. This was a Leo Guild novel, a character I've grown fond of.
5. Billy the Kid: Endless Ride. Another Billy the Kid biography, the best I've read so far. I particularly liked how it delved into the Kid's childhood and adolescence. Gave me lots of material to work with.
6. Guild, by Ed Gorman. Ditto on what I already said about Gorman's prose, and a new character for me to follow: bounty hunter Leo Guild. Don't know if he's written any more of these, but I hope so.
December 11, 2011
On Grad School, My Brush With the NAVY, Finishing Well & Slaying the Dragon...
A long time ago in a galaxy not so far away, there was a very silly boy who thought he could run away from his problems into the military. He'd just called off his engagement to a girl he knew he shouldn't marry (because they didn't love each other anymore, though neither of them had fully realized it yet), had gotten himself involved in some things he shouldn't have, bombed out of his first teaching job, and turned himself into a financial and spiritual wreck. "The military", he thought, "that's the trick. It'll help me learn discipline. Make me all matured, and stuff."
Luckily, this very silly boy wasn't COMPLETELY silly, so he decided to test the military waters as a reservist, first. For the NAVY. The book work was easy, and this silly boy even found a designation he was interested in - Religious Petty Officer. Not only would he work in the chapel with the chaplains, he'd also work with Marines (because they have no chaplains) and be rated in firearms (because chaplains can't pack heat).
But, reserve life was a bit disheartening. Mostly, it was a bunch of old, out of shape guys sitting around watching John Wayne NAVY movies, or cops looking for easy part-time paychecks. Probably the best part was having lodging and food paid up for the weekend. In the great metropolis of Elmira, NY.
But, after all that, even after surviving and graduating boot-camp (the worst four weeks of his life), as easy as reservist life was, this silly boy ended up failing at that, too, mostly because his reserve center was over an hour away, his car would never start, and he could never make drill. The NAVY eventually decided that even THEY weren't desperate enough to require this silly boy's services any longer.
Anyway, before all that happened, when this silly boy returned from boot-camp, he went right to grad-school, because he dreamed of paying for college with his G. I. Bill. Of course, before leaving for boot-camp, he got into a car accident with an uninsured car, which pretty much wrecked all his finances upon returning. He also returned two weeks late into the semester, behind on his reading and work for his two graduate classes.
This silly boy was young. Inexperienced. Ill-prepared for bombastic, over-bearing graduate professors. And in a really bad place in life.
So he promptly failed his two graduate classes. Did so badly, in such a bad place in his life, he didn't even bother withdrawing. Just stopped going to class, because he literally doubted if he'd ever return to college, ever.
And thus, would this folly ever follow him through his days....
Fast-forward to now. So basically, I've been afraid of this for some time, that those F's would dog me, pull me down. Even through all the A and A- classes, those two F's loomed rather large. And, as I investigated arrangements to finally close off my MA in Creative Writing/English the other day, those two F's popped up their silly selves and waved at me with wide, gap-toothed grins.
So, instead of just taking a Spanish test to fill my foreign language requirement, I have to take two more classes next semester. Even after all those A's, because of those two F's, my GPA stands at a 2.84.
I need a 3.0 to graduate.
Honestly, I'm only annoyed by the money/taking out more loans situation. In some ways, I actually WANT to take classes again. I started my grad degree strong, plowed through it, gritting my teeth, but really peetered out in the end. Fatigued, burned out from juggling school at night, teaching during the day, Zack's then-new autism diagnosis and all it brought AND my own writing aspirations, I really did NOT cross the finish line with gusto. I limped. Heck, I crawled.
So, in some ways, I'm sorta really okay with having to take two more classes. Because I really want to finish well. Go out swinging, knocking it out of the park. The ghosts of my dismal academic failure after my failure in the military still haunt me. For awhile, as the classes passed and the 'As' rolled in, I felt like I'd vanquished those ghosts. But as the fatigue dragged me further down, seemed like I was doing what I always eventually do...bailing out right before the finish line.
But too much rides on this. I'm happy and content at Seton, but I'd like a stab at teaching at either Broome Community or Tompkins-Cortland Community someday, even if only as an adjunct. I'd like to apply as an instructor to Seton Hill someday, for their low-residence MFA in Popular Fiction. I can't do that without my MA.
So it's time to wade back into the fray. Finish well, and slay this dragon. I'm ready, and it's time to get this done.
And, even though I've clearly established the military is NOT for me, I do sorta wish I'd finished well there, too. I look pretty good in uniform, honestly.
Luckily, this very silly boy wasn't COMPLETELY silly, so he decided to test the military waters as a reservist, first. For the NAVY. The book work was easy, and this silly boy even found a designation he was interested in - Religious Petty Officer. Not only would he work in the chapel with the chaplains, he'd also work with Marines (because they have no chaplains) and be rated in firearms (because chaplains can't pack heat).But, reserve life was a bit disheartening. Mostly, it was a bunch of old, out of shape guys sitting around watching John Wayne NAVY movies, or cops looking for easy part-time paychecks. Probably the best part was having lodging and food paid up for the weekend. In the great metropolis of Elmira, NY.
But, after all that, even after surviving and graduating boot-camp (the worst four weeks of his life), as easy as reservist life was, this silly boy ended up failing at that, too, mostly because his reserve center was over an hour away, his car would never start, and he could never make drill. The NAVY eventually decided that even THEY weren't desperate enough to require this silly boy's services any longer.
Anyway, before all that happened, when this silly boy returned from boot-camp, he went right to grad-school, because he dreamed of paying for college with his G. I. Bill. Of course, before leaving for boot-camp, he got into a car accident with an uninsured car, which pretty much wrecked all his finances upon returning. He also returned two weeks late into the semester, behind on his reading and work for his two graduate classes.
This silly boy was young. Inexperienced. Ill-prepared for bombastic, over-bearing graduate professors. And in a really bad place in life.
So he promptly failed his two graduate classes. Did so badly, in such a bad place in his life, he didn't even bother withdrawing. Just stopped going to class, because he literally doubted if he'd ever return to college, ever.
And thus, would this folly ever follow him through his days....
Fast-forward to now. So basically, I've been afraid of this for some time, that those F's would dog me, pull me down. Even through all the A and A- classes, those two F's loomed rather large. And, as I investigated arrangements to finally close off my MA in Creative Writing/English the other day, those two F's popped up their silly selves and waved at me with wide, gap-toothed grins.
So, instead of just taking a Spanish test to fill my foreign language requirement, I have to take two more classes next semester. Even after all those A's, because of those two F's, my GPA stands at a 2.84.
I need a 3.0 to graduate.
Honestly, I'm only annoyed by the money/taking out more loans situation. In some ways, I actually WANT to take classes again. I started my grad degree strong, plowed through it, gritting my teeth, but really peetered out in the end. Fatigued, burned out from juggling school at night, teaching during the day, Zack's then-new autism diagnosis and all it brought AND my own writing aspirations, I really did NOT cross the finish line with gusto. I limped. Heck, I crawled.
So, in some ways, I'm sorta really okay with having to take two more classes. Because I really want to finish well. Go out swinging, knocking it out of the park. The ghosts of my dismal academic failure after my failure in the military still haunt me. For awhile, as the classes passed and the 'As' rolled in, I felt like I'd vanquished those ghosts. But as the fatigue dragged me further down, seemed like I was doing what I always eventually do...bailing out right before the finish line.
But too much rides on this. I'm happy and content at Seton, but I'd like a stab at teaching at either Broome Community or Tompkins-Cortland Community someday, even if only as an adjunct. I'd like to apply as an instructor to Seton Hill someday, for their low-residence MFA in Popular Fiction. I can't do that without my MA.
So it's time to wade back into the fray. Finish well, and slay this dragon. I'm ready, and it's time to get this done.
And, even though I've clearly established the military is NOT for me, I do sorta wish I'd finished well there, too. I look pretty good in uniform, honestly.
December 9, 2011
I've Got Klout...?
So, notch another mark in the "ambiguous social networking category" with my Klout page. Several months back, a few friends and colleagues started giving me "klout" - basically like "kudos", I suppose - in a few different categories, the top of which were:
Writing Horror Teaching Basically, Klout is supposed to "measure" how much influence a person exerts upon their social network, basically counting up all the "likes" and comments on FB statues, comments to blogs, re-tweets, etc. So basically, my "Klout Influence" is how much impact I have on the social networking interwebz. And, apparently, according to Klout I'm a "specialist":
You may not be a celebrity, but within your area of expertise your opinion is second to none. Your content is likely focused around a specific topic or industry with a focused, highly-engaged audience.
Basically, I blog fairly consistently, about fairly consistent things, and have decent interaction with people who read what I blog. There's even a cool little grid, ranking me alongside other folks considered to be my "colleagues":
I'm right down here in the lower right with authors Mike Duran and Matt Cardin (pretty darn good company) in the Focused/Consistent quadrant.
Once again...what does this all mean? I've linked almost every account I have into Klout, so it can access and "measure" all my social activity...whatever that means. It's pretty low maintenance, however, and it's got "perks" - free stuff you can claim, depending on your "Klout", and I recently got for free a brand new, trade paperback edition of Stephen King's Bag of Bones, so, hey...can't be all bad.
Anyway, here's my Klout page. If you think I have some, go right ahead and nominate me...
Writing Horror Teaching Basically, Klout is supposed to "measure" how much influence a person exerts upon their social network, basically counting up all the "likes" and comments on FB statues, comments to blogs, re-tweets, etc. So basically, my "Klout Influence" is how much impact I have on the social networking interwebz. And, apparently, according to Klout I'm a "specialist":
You may not be a celebrity, but within your area of expertise your opinion is second to none. Your content is likely focused around a specific topic or industry with a focused, highly-engaged audience.
Basically, I blog fairly consistently, about fairly consistent things, and have decent interaction with people who read what I blog. There's even a cool little grid, ranking me alongside other folks considered to be my "colleagues":
I'm right down here in the lower right with authors Mike Duran and Matt Cardin (pretty darn good company) in the Focused/Consistent quadrant. Once again...what does this all mean? I've linked almost every account I have into Klout, so it can access and "measure" all my social activity...whatever that means. It's pretty low maintenance, however, and it's got "perks" - free stuff you can claim, depending on your "Klout", and I recently got for free a brand new, trade paperback edition of Stephen King's Bag of Bones, so, hey...can't be all bad.
Anyway, here's my Klout page. If you think I have some, go right ahead and nominate me...
December 8, 2011
Tumbling Around...
***Edited
So I'm on Tumblr, now. Not sure how I'm going to use it. From my initial poking around, it seems to be a blogging platform with a follow and a update feed like Facebook. Looks to be lots of cool things I could post with Tumblr, but the key is figuring out HOW to use it, exactly.
I gotta be honest. I'm very ambivalent about social networking, blogging, Facebook, Twitter, all the rest. Sometimes, these things are kinda fun. Neat to post and comment and Tweet back and forth. And, taking advantage of social networking seems to be the big "thing" that's expected of writers today. Of course, even though it's expected, I don't know if any research has been conducted as to whether or not it actually impacts sales. Far as I can tell, a writer primarily gains readers because of good writing, good reviews, nominations, things like that.
And that's probably why I have a hard time believing that getting all "uber-connected" on social networks helps gain readers and followers, because far as I'M concerned, I could care a less how much a writer blogs, Tweets, Facebooks, Tumbls, whatever. I care about how WELL they write.
Case in point, two of my favorite writers, Ron Malfi and Norman Partridge. Ron doesn't blog at all. Tweets/Facebooks moderately. But he snags Publishers Weekly reviews like a screech owl ravaging for mice, he's a superb stylist, and his most recent novel, The Floating Staircase (I still love that title; makes me think of a Hardy Boys book) is one of the best I've read this year, and has been recommended for a Stoker Award for Best Novel.
Now, take Norman Partridge. No Facebook or Twitter account. He blogs, but mostly about stuff he loves. Most of the time, he's busy WRITING. And he's doing just fine, isn't he?
Some days, my finger just hovers right over the "delete" button on my Facebook. Sometimes I want to nuke Twitter. I don't, but I just can't help thinking that sometimes, all this stuff takes away from what I should be doing most, as a writer - writing and reading. Even now, typing this blog post, I could've been reading Headstone City, by Tom Piccirilli.
So, given all that, I gotta really figure out WHY I want to use Tumblr. If I can find a real personal use for it, something that's me and not a shallow attempt to network, then I will. Maybe some of my really lame poetry? Maybe photo blogs over the summer? We'll see. Because there's no point in trying to reach an entirely new audience on an entirely new social networking site if I don't have anything worthwhile that I WANT to say....
So I'm on Tumblr, now. Not sure how I'm going to use it. From my initial poking around, it seems to be a blogging platform with a follow and a update feed like Facebook. Looks to be lots of cool things I could post with Tumblr, but the key is figuring out HOW to use it, exactly.
I gotta be honest. I'm very ambivalent about social networking, blogging, Facebook, Twitter, all the rest. Sometimes, these things are kinda fun. Neat to post and comment and Tweet back and forth. And, taking advantage of social networking seems to be the big "thing" that's expected of writers today. Of course, even though it's expected, I don't know if any research has been conducted as to whether or not it actually impacts sales. Far as I can tell, a writer primarily gains readers because of good writing, good reviews, nominations, things like that.
And that's probably why I have a hard time believing that getting all "uber-connected" on social networks helps gain readers and followers, because far as I'M concerned, I could care a less how much a writer blogs, Tweets, Facebooks, Tumbls, whatever. I care about how WELL they write.
Case in point, two of my favorite writers, Ron Malfi and Norman Partridge. Ron doesn't blog at all. Tweets/Facebooks moderately. But he snags Publishers Weekly reviews like a screech owl ravaging for mice, he's a superb stylist, and his most recent novel, The Floating Staircase (I still love that title; makes me think of a Hardy Boys book) is one of the best I've read this year, and has been recommended for a Stoker Award for Best Novel.
Now, take Norman Partridge. No Facebook or Twitter account. He blogs, but mostly about stuff he loves. Most of the time, he's busy WRITING. And he's doing just fine, isn't he?
Some days, my finger just hovers right over the "delete" button on my Facebook. Sometimes I want to nuke Twitter. I don't, but I just can't help thinking that sometimes, all this stuff takes away from what I should be doing most, as a writer - writing and reading. Even now, typing this blog post, I could've been reading Headstone City, by Tom Piccirilli.
So, given all that, I gotta really figure out WHY I want to use Tumblr. If I can find a real personal use for it, something that's me and not a shallow attempt to network, then I will. Maybe some of my really lame poetry? Maybe photo blogs over the summer? We'll see. Because there's no point in trying to reach an entirely new audience on an entirely new social networking site if I don't have anything worthwhile that I WANT to say....
December 7, 2011
Striking out on my own...
So, I'm pretty sure I'll be finishing the current project. It's running along nicely, feels so "good" I've been posting lots of excerpts on Facebook, and I haven't felt this sure of finishing something since
Hiram Grange
. How do I know I'm probably going to finish it?
Well, for one thing, it's going in "the box".
During Hiram Grange, something felt... different. I knew I would finish it. A lot of the early drafts and false starts I threw away, but the "final" rough, handwritten draft I kept. Because I knew this was the "real deal" (in other words, knew I'd finish it), so I kept the handwritten and then first typed rough draft in a box.
Why? Mostly nostalgia. Or because it's one of my "things". I've no illusions of being popular enough someday that fans will want to buy this stuff off Ebay. Not sure what I think about that practice, honestly, but then, I'm not much of a "collector" so I don't understand that mindset, period. I collect things purely on nostalgic value, and that's it.
So, Hiram Grange went "in the box". That's how I knew I'd finish it. The novel I worked on before this never went "in the box". I kept drafting, redrafting, throwing away, rearranging. But, as you can see from the picture above, this current project is "in the box". Which means, I'll be typing "The End" to this one, I'm pretty sure.
It's a nice feeling.
But different from Hiram Grange, for one big reason.
I have nowhere to send this.
The more I think about it, the more I realize how lucky I was to get a gig like Hiram Grange so early on. Was very freeing for me to KNOW that all I had to do was:
1. finish the story
2. not suck
...and it'd get published. And hey, I got a token advance and everything. Got to enjoy lots of feedback from the publisher. That was very empowering. Really pushed me to my limits, to the point I wrote the first draft in three months, writing nearly 6 hours a day at the library over summer break.
This one, however...is different. Because I've got nowhere to send it. The acquisitions editor at HarperTeen really liked it, but two strikes fell against it:
1. It wasn't really a teen story
2. It didn't sit well with the sales team
And I have queried other publishers. Have a few leads. But for the most part, no one wants this like Shroud wanted Hiram.
But I'm finding, more and more, that I want to finish the story, and that's good enough.
Regardless of whether or not it'll be published.
And that's probably my biggest issue with the new wave of digital self-publishing and self-publishing in general, especially for new writers. Call me an idealist (and you'll be completely spot-on) but isn't that the whole point of writing in the first place? That we have stories in our heads that MUST be written. With no guarantee of them ever being published, but in the end, we MUST write them.
Again, call me an idealist. An elitist. I'm good for it. Got a thick skin, and all. But seems like to me, the whole self-publishing thing - especially if you haven't proven yourself as a writer - cheapens the whole writing process. Is it about publishing whatever you want to, because you're "the boss", maybe not working quite as hard or remaining quite as patient because you know that quick avenue is there, waiting, calling, and tempting?
Or, is it about the passion for a story and storytelling that is ABOVE being published? And yeah, I'll admit - I want to be read as much as the next writer. I want fans. A following. Maybe to make some cash along the way.
But. more and more...I want to be a WRITER. I want to LOVE WRITING.
Whether or not my writing gets published. Because in the end, that's the only reason to push myself so hard. Because I love what I'm doing. And does that mean writers who self-publish don't love what they're doing? Of course not.
But - and no snark intended, because again, what's right for me as a writer isn't right for others - would half of them labor day in, day out, for years...if self-publishing WASN'T such an easy option?
I wonder. All I know, for me...average Joe writer with very little in the way of a following, with very little cachet to separate me from thousands of others swarming the self-publishing wave, I need to love the story and the writing itself. Because, far as I can tell, if I don't love that, then self-publishing will just be a pointless exercise of going through the motions so I can call myself "published".
I'm starting to love this story.
And getting more and more okay with striking out on my own. Maybe someone will publish this. But if not, at this point...I just want to write "The End". And somehow, I think that will be good enough.
Well, for one thing, it's going in "the box".
During Hiram Grange, something felt... different. I knew I would finish it. A lot of the early drafts and false starts I threw away, but the "final" rough, handwritten draft I kept. Because I knew this was the "real deal" (in other words, knew I'd finish it), so I kept the handwritten and then first typed rough draft in a box.Why? Mostly nostalgia. Or because it's one of my "things". I've no illusions of being popular enough someday that fans will want to buy this stuff off Ebay. Not sure what I think about that practice, honestly, but then, I'm not much of a "collector" so I don't understand that mindset, period. I collect things purely on nostalgic value, and that's it.
So, Hiram Grange went "in the box". That's how I knew I'd finish it. The novel I worked on before this never went "in the box". I kept drafting, redrafting, throwing away, rearranging. But, as you can see from the picture above, this current project is "in the box". Which means, I'll be typing "The End" to this one, I'm pretty sure.
It's a nice feeling.
But different from Hiram Grange, for one big reason.
I have nowhere to send this.
The more I think about it, the more I realize how lucky I was to get a gig like Hiram Grange so early on. Was very freeing for me to KNOW that all I had to do was:
1. finish the story
2. not suck
...and it'd get published. And hey, I got a token advance and everything. Got to enjoy lots of feedback from the publisher. That was very empowering. Really pushed me to my limits, to the point I wrote the first draft in three months, writing nearly 6 hours a day at the library over summer break.
This one, however...is different. Because I've got nowhere to send it. The acquisitions editor at HarperTeen really liked it, but two strikes fell against it:
1. It wasn't really a teen story
2. It didn't sit well with the sales team
And I have queried other publishers. Have a few leads. But for the most part, no one wants this like Shroud wanted Hiram.
But I'm finding, more and more, that I want to finish the story, and that's good enough.
Regardless of whether or not it'll be published.
And that's probably my biggest issue with the new wave of digital self-publishing and self-publishing in general, especially for new writers. Call me an idealist (and you'll be completely spot-on) but isn't that the whole point of writing in the first place? That we have stories in our heads that MUST be written. With no guarantee of them ever being published, but in the end, we MUST write them.
Again, call me an idealist. An elitist. I'm good for it. Got a thick skin, and all. But seems like to me, the whole self-publishing thing - especially if you haven't proven yourself as a writer - cheapens the whole writing process. Is it about publishing whatever you want to, because you're "the boss", maybe not working quite as hard or remaining quite as patient because you know that quick avenue is there, waiting, calling, and tempting?
Or, is it about the passion for a story and storytelling that is ABOVE being published? And yeah, I'll admit - I want to be read as much as the next writer. I want fans. A following. Maybe to make some cash along the way.
But. more and more...I want to be a WRITER. I want to LOVE WRITING.
Whether or not my writing gets published. Because in the end, that's the only reason to push myself so hard. Because I love what I'm doing. And does that mean writers who self-publish don't love what they're doing? Of course not.
But - and no snark intended, because again, what's right for me as a writer isn't right for others - would half of them labor day in, day out, for years...if self-publishing WASN'T such an easy option?
I wonder. All I know, for me...average Joe writer with very little in the way of a following, with very little cachet to separate me from thousands of others swarming the self-publishing wave, I need to love the story and the writing itself. Because, far as I can tell, if I don't love that, then self-publishing will just be a pointless exercise of going through the motions so I can call myself "published".
I'm starting to love this story.
And getting more and more okay with striking out on my own. Maybe someone will publish this. But if not, at this point...I just want to write "The End". And somehow, I think that will be good enough.
November 24, 2011
A Hiram Grange Thanksgiving...
I had a really meaningful Thanksgiving post planned, but things have been so busy, I'll probably do it next week. Mostly, it was about being thankful for stuff (gee, really?), but about being thankful for HARD stuff, stuff we don't necessarily like, not just being thankful for easy stuff.
That having been said, before I head down to the BatCave to light the fire and rattle the keys, I'll share this little snippet, just another log on the fire, to help keep those flames roaring. Now, it's conceivable I might actually write and publish something else that will get reviewed someday, and Hiram Grange & The Chosen One's street date has long since passed, but it's nice to run across little blurbs about it here and there. Saw this Hiram review on Goodreads the other day:
"This book drew me in from the first page. Characters were well-developed and the story was full of action and vivid-details. I'll never look at maggots the same way again!"
There you go, folks. That's me. Busting long-held stereotypes of maggots since 2010. And hey, if you pick up a copy today, it should arrive by Christmas!
Otherwise, enjoy your turkey and stuffing, and have a Happy Thanksgiving!
That having been said, before I head down to the BatCave to light the fire and rattle the keys, I'll share this little snippet, just another log on the fire, to help keep those flames roaring. Now, it's conceivable I might actually write and publish something else that will get reviewed someday, and Hiram Grange & The Chosen One's street date has long since passed, but it's nice to run across little blurbs about it here and there. Saw this Hiram review on Goodreads the other day:
"This book drew me in from the first page. Characters were well-developed and the story was full of action and vivid-details. I'll never look at maggots the same way again!"
There you go, folks. That's me. Busting long-held stereotypes of maggots since 2010. And hey, if you pick up a copy today, it should arrive by Christmas!
Otherwise, enjoy your turkey and stuffing, and have a Happy Thanksgiving!
November 23, 2011
Advice From Norman Partridge: American Frankenstein: Building Your Resume
Absolutely awesome blog post from Norman Partridge today. So MUCH of this sums up how I feel about myself and where I am and where I want to be as a writer. Here's some awesome snippets:
"and I wonder if young writers will get that kind of one-stop-shopping glance in the rearview mirror as the years pass -- I mean, does anyone really archive their emails or (even worse) text messages? I don't think so."
I love this. At times, I wish we didn't have email at all. The nice thing about mailing out a hardcopy submission - the few times I've done it - is you get to leave it alone. Which is so freeing. Because you only check your snail mail once a day. Now, I find myself, with this wondrous thing called email, checking my email EVERY FIVE MINUTES. And that amps up the depressing even more. Sometimes, it gets so bad, I put a ban on checking my email for a few days or so.....
"Because writing is business. Oh, it can be art, too, but those battles are fought on another front, when you're alone with the page in your office."
Yes, yes, YES. Anything you write - whatever type of story - you turn into art when it's just you and the paper/computer.
"there's an easy way to size things up for yourself. Just take a look at your personal bookshelf, the one where you keep your solo work and contributor copies of anthologies and magazines where your work has appeared. Run your finger along those spines. Take your creative pulse. See if the work bound up in those volumes satisfies you or doesn't. If there are novels on those shelves you wish you hadn't written, think about the ones you should have written instead... and write 'em. Think about the books you'd like to see up there two years from now... and three years past that. Think about the publishers you've worked with and the ones you'd like to work with, and how you can position yourself to make some of those deals a reality. Think about where you've been, and where you're going, and the fiction that's going to get you there.
Make some plans. Kindle yourself some creative fire. Because it's the fire that will get you there. No matter where it comes from. No matter how you make it. It's the one thing that every writer needs to make good work.
So kindle it up, and when those flames deliver you to the keyboard be thankful.
Rattle those keys."
Every. Day. Every single day, my friends.
Read on....American Frankenstein: Building Your Resume
"and I wonder if young writers will get that kind of one-stop-shopping glance in the rearview mirror as the years pass -- I mean, does anyone really archive their emails or (even worse) text messages? I don't think so."
I love this. At times, I wish we didn't have email at all. The nice thing about mailing out a hardcopy submission - the few times I've done it - is you get to leave it alone. Which is so freeing. Because you only check your snail mail once a day. Now, I find myself, with this wondrous thing called email, checking my email EVERY FIVE MINUTES. And that amps up the depressing even more. Sometimes, it gets so bad, I put a ban on checking my email for a few days or so.....
"Because writing is business. Oh, it can be art, too, but those battles are fought on another front, when you're alone with the page in your office."
Yes, yes, YES. Anything you write - whatever type of story - you turn into art when it's just you and the paper/computer.
"there's an easy way to size things up for yourself. Just take a look at your personal bookshelf, the one where you keep your solo work and contributor copies of anthologies and magazines where your work has appeared. Run your finger along those spines. Take your creative pulse. See if the work bound up in those volumes satisfies you or doesn't. If there are novels on those shelves you wish you hadn't written, think about the ones you should have written instead... and write 'em. Think about the books you'd like to see up there two years from now... and three years past that. Think about the publishers you've worked with and the ones you'd like to work with, and how you can position yourself to make some of those deals a reality. Think about where you've been, and where you're going, and the fiction that's going to get you there.
Make some plans. Kindle yourself some creative fire. Because it's the fire that will get you there. No matter where it comes from. No matter how you make it. It's the one thing that every writer needs to make good work.
So kindle it up, and when those flames deliver you to the keyboard be thankful.
Rattle those keys."
Every. Day. Every single day, my friends.
Read on....American Frankenstein: Building Your Resume
November 22, 2011
Push Past the Wall
Another mini blog for you sleepyheads out there.
Got a nice little headache today. Right center of my eyes. But somehow, manage to drag myself out of bed, stumble through my morning rituals half awake, because I know...especially with this story, because I think.... I think...it's gonna be a doozy...that by the time I get breakfast in me, and the caffeine hits, I'll be typing away, lost in the story.
Of course, I'm working OFF hard copy, actually typing, now. That's always easier. Not just because it's typing, but also because it finally feels like I'm MAKING something. Something that looks like a manuscript I'll eventually submit.
Let's just hope y'all get to read it someday...
Got a nice little headache today. Right center of my eyes. But somehow, manage to drag myself out of bed, stumble through my morning rituals half awake, because I know...especially with this story, because I think.... I think...it's gonna be a doozy...that by the time I get breakfast in me, and the caffeine hits, I'll be typing away, lost in the story.
Of course, I'm working OFF hard copy, actually typing, now. That's always easier. Not just because it's typing, but also because it finally feels like I'm MAKING something. Something that looks like a manuscript I'll eventually submit.
Let's just hope y'all get to read it someday...
