This Time Together Quotes

“Cavort, dear, just cavort”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“Carol, if you could be a member of the opposite sex for twenty-four hours, and then pop back and be yourself again, who would you be and what would you do?” My mind started racing like mad. Opposite sex? For twenty-four hours? Who would I be? What would I do? I said a quick little prayer. Please, let me just open my mouth and have whatever comes out make sense. I took a deep breath and what came out was this: “I’d be Osama bin Laden, and I’d kill myself.”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“I made a fool of myself over John Foster Dulles. I made an ass of myself over John Foster Dulles. Something wasn’t right. They weren’t laughing. I pushed on. The first time I saw him ’twas at the UN. I never had been one to swoon over men, But I swooned and the drums started pounding and then … I MADE A FOOL OF MYSELF OVER JOHHHNNN FOSTER DULLES…. Nothing. Nada. They were just sitting there, staring at me. It wasn’t that they were unruly or not interested. It would’ve been better if they had been, but no, they were paying attention, they just weren’t laughing. I felt like I was performing in front of an oil painting. And this was only the opening number. I had twenty minutes to go. My body was heavy with dread.”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“She lit another cigarette and smiled. “And that, kid, is when they added the S to the end of my last name.” I laughed right through the kumquats. I miss her. She died early on the morning of my birthday in 1989, and I got my flowers and the card from her that afternoon.”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“Oh God. I wiped my eyes with my fingers and looked up at him. He had kind eyes—bleary, but kind. “Hey there, little lady.” He smiled at me nicely. His voice matched his kind eyes. “Yes, sir?” Please, God, don’t let me blubber. “Well, my goodness.” He reeled back, bumping up against the wall, and then pulled himself forward again. “Aren’t you the little lady I just saw this very minute? Downstairs—just now, on the stage?” He had a sweet smile. I was starting to feel a little bit better. I smiled back. “Yes, sir, I am.” There was a pause. “Boy, you stink.” And with that he disappeared into the men’s room.”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“Our legacy is really the lives we touch, the inspiration we give, altering someone's plan---if even for a moment---and getting them to think, rage, cry, laugh, argue...Walk around the block, dazed...More than anything, we are remembered for our smiles; the ones we share with our closest and dearest, and the ones we bestow on a total stranger, who needed it RIGHT THEN, and God put you there to deliver. ---Carrie Louise Hamilton, dedication page”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“As for the career, sometimes I catch myself daydreaming about being young again and doing it all over. Then I bring myself up short when I realize how incredibly fortunate I was.”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“I would stand like this, yelling directions, for what seemed like hours without a break. One time I was dying for a drink of water, and I caught his attention as he was on his way to his office. “M-Mr. Batton?” He looked at me. “Mr. Batton … could I please use the water fountain? I’m thirsty.” He came at me like a tank. “Burnett!” Lord, he’s actually talking. “Yessir?” “Don’t you ever do that again!” “What should I do?” “You snap your fingers until you get my attention, and when you do, you open your mouth and point to the back of your throat!”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

“I loved it. You gave it more production than that f——ing Jack Warner!”
― Carol Burnett, This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection