Nice Racism Quotes

“Whom exactly does the culture of niceness serve? I suppose it serves the people for whom life is going well, the people in power. But where does this leave less empowered individuals and populations with legitimate complaints? Speaking truth to power too often results in feelings of judgment and anger at the complainer”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Defaulting to whatever engagement feels most comfortable is not guided by critical thinking and is not anti-racist.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“As white progressives, the participants expected to be validated in their wokeness, not called in and exposed.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Because we tend to see ourselves as individuals, rather than as white individuals, we proceed as if power dynamics are not at play in our cross-racial interactions. We don’t understand that we bring our histories with us into these interactions, and they are histories of harm. We represent not only ourselves but all the other white people who have hurt their friends of color. If we want to be the one in ten Oluo holds hope for, we will need to earn that trust, not expect it.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Processing those feelings with another white person who can listen with compassion while still holding us accountable for our actions is a much healthier choice.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“The binary makes complicity with racism and being a good person mutually exclusive.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“We might ask ourselves why we think the best response to racial inequality is niceness.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Indeed, I don’t think there will be structural transformation without personal transformation”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“But because they see themselves as progressive in terms of racism, they do not see anti-racism efforts as directed at them; they “already know all this” and are not part of the problem. Thus, they may not involve themselves in anti-racist efforts, but if they do, they can be rather self-righteous as they point out racism in everyone other than themselves.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Individualism is a deeply imbedded narrative in Western cultures, and it plays a particularly important role in the maintenance of white supremacy”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“The sad irony is that the moment we believe we “get it” is not the moment our journey to racial enlightenment comes to an end. “Getting it” should immediately engender humility in recognition of how much we don’t—and likely never will—completely know. Deepening our understanding, building our skills, and demonstrating anti-racist practice are ongoing. Awareness should add new dimensions to the continuing journey: humility and accountability. Awareness that does not lead to sustained engagement is not meaningful.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Some of the most intense white fragility erupts regularly on progressive Facebook groups such as Pantsuit Nation when white women are challenged racially.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“There is deep racial resentment roiling just under the surface for many white people (and barely concealed resentment toward women under the surface for many men). Therein lies a confusing mix of guilt and shame, superiority and contempt.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Unfortunately, racism is not typically viewed as a deeply complex issue that mainstream culture does not prepare white people to engage critically with and thus requires ongoing study and engagement by white people to gain some measure of expertise. When it comes to racism, white people tend to hold up all opinions as equally valid.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“First, for a white person to interject with what they are interested in hearing—while a woman of color is speaking—is both silencing and entitled. This move says, “What you are saying is not of interest or value to me. Rather than appreciate this rare opportunity to hear a woman of color advocate for her community, I am going to insert myself into the middle of your talk and let it be known that I want to hear something different. I am entitled to do so because my interests are more important”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Responding with strong emotions to injustice is, of course, rational. But the passive-aggressive, conflict-avoiding culture of niceness, along with the ever-looming threat of triggering white fragility, puts enormous pressure on activists of color not to show emotions that make white people uncomfortable.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Systemic racism consistently works to the benefit of white people overall and to the disadvantage of BIPOC people overall, which is why I reserve language to capture its directional nature”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Voluntarily or even enthusiastically participating in an anti-racism seminar doesn’t mean that one acts in allyship in daily life.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“I don’t need to hold consciously racist beliefs or intentions in order to benefit from being white, any more than I need to hold consciously ableist beliefs in order to benefit from a society that considers me “ablebodied” and thus “normal” and is set up to accommodate the way I move, see, and communicate. But it goes deeper than just receiving benefits and being able to take them for granted. I have also internalized the message of my normalcy and that it is better to be white, and better to be “normal” than “disabled.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Policy change must be taken up simultaneously with personal and interpersonal work.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“The kinship with African Americans that white people attempt to create from proximity might be termed false or fabricated kinship. This fabricated kinship is not based on a shared experience or even a shared sense of goodwill and connection. It is centered on and serves highly problematic white needs: the need to feel benevolence by granting the Other a condescending nod of acceptance and approval and the desire to attain “not racist” social capital, no matter how fleeting or trivial the encounter. “I accept you because I am in charge and I am not racist.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Most white people, including those in the so-called choir, have no idea how racially unequal society is.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“…every moment that I spend in white space reinforces in me a particular (and limited) worldview and experience. But the deeper message being reinforced is that we lose nothing of value by living in segregation. In fact, the white the space is, the more likely it is to be perceived as “good” and “safe” in the white mind. This is a profound message that we must begin to grapple with…”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“When I am challenged by feedback from a person of color and do not understand the feedback or feel defensive about it, I change the roles in my mind. I imagine that I have just challenged a man on sexism and he is saying out loud to me the same things I am thinking about the feedback I just received. Changing the roles usually makes what is off in my thinking obvious.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Yes, I have resentment about the deep injustices of patriarchy. But I can suffer under patriarchy and still perpetuate racism.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“So regardless of what is informing my silence—even if it is a sense of inferiority—it still functions to maintain white solidarity and uphold racism.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“This move demonstrates an inability to think strategically about our own role in anti-racist endeavors, a lack of practice articulating what we think we know, and an unhelpful distancing from others in the struggle.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“The presence of these women of color provides an opportunity for men like Biden and Meadows to expand their understanding of the perspectives and experiences of BIPOC people and evolve in changing times. Yet rather than engaging with curiosity, openness and humility, they dig in deeper, protecting their limited understanding, refusing to listen or learn.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Awareness should add new dimensions to the continuing journey: humility and accountability. Awareness that does not lead to sustained engagement is not meaningful.”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm

“Equating an oppression that you experience with racism”
― Robin DiAngelo, Nice Racism: How Progressive White People Perpetuate Racial Harm