Why Bother Quotes

“I forgot that the purpose of desire is to draw us forward into living, into what captivates us—not to help us attain a particular career or creative goal or get paid more or even to stay married or find lasting love. I forgot that every major transition requires rediscovering desire; without that, I faltered. I forgot that what I bother about is always my choice and that I must actually choose, instead of looking outside myself for what to do next and then pretending it was my choice.”
― Jennifer Louden, Why Bother?: Discover the Desire for What’s Next

“The desolate kind of why bother means looking only in the rearview mirror of your life, back at your story that no longer makes sense to you or has been taken from you. Or, if you’re younger, you may find yourself looking into the future and believing all the good stuff of life is either out of your reach or no longer exists. It’s letting grief over past losses and traumas devour your future. It’s giving up on believing there is more for you, a more that can be as satisfying, as enlivening, as meaningful, as beautiful as what has come before or what has yet to be. It’s choosing comfort and routine over aliveness and growth. It’s believing your story of what’s not possible more than the bracing reality of taking action. It’s knowing you’ll never hear the voice of your beloved partner or friend or parent again—and refusing to listen for anything else. It’s too much sugar, too much wine, too many nights watching hours of TV, or too much partying when you want to be dancing or writing or learning the names of the constellations. It’s pointlessness, apathy, embitterment, disappointment, dismay. Perhaps, most of all, it’s disgust at yourself for being here in this haggard blank ick.”
― Jennifer Louden, Why Bother?: Discover the Desire for What’s Next