Bachelor Society Quotes

“Me: The cat gets more attention than I do.
Abbott: Whose fault is that? Are you one of those guys who doesn’t want a commitment but who also wants girls falling all over him?
Yes. One hundred percent.
Me: No.
But yeah, totally.”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“Tap out a message to my idiot best friends as I walk back to my office: What time can you meet at The Basement?

Phillip:Yeah”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“I shrug. "Because I only hang out with you? And other women. Come on - what guy wants to approach a gaggle of girlfriends out in public?"
We're an intimidating bunch when we're at a bar for drinks: loud, obnoxious, and out for a good time - not to pick up men. Well, they're not. I occasionally am, but I'm the only one who's single (and ready to mingle), despite the bloat in my stomach and the oozing goop coming from the corner of my mouth.”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“Abbott Margolis is the female version of myself, and I want to strangle her and stick my dick in her at the same time. Wait—that didn’t come out right”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“This is my apartment,” I remind her.
“Mi casa es su casa.”
“My house is not your house.”
“Mi stuff es su stuff.”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“This is my safe place.”
Her safe place? I don’t even know what that means. “What the heck does that mean?”
It means I came over here because I wanted company and I know I don’t have to worry about you hitting on me because we’re just friends.”
Well fuck.
Friend-zoned?
I already decided to friend-zone her – where does she get the audacity to friend-zone me? Doesn’t she realize the pecking order here? It starts with me. Me, at the top, hen-pecking away and deciding who gets what.
I do the zoning in my relationships. Me.
Not her.”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society

“Look at us. Just look.” I gesture to our reflection, at how majestic we look, the three of us peacocking in our finery.
Murmurs abound.
“Damn we look amazing.”
“You’re one handsome devil, Brooks Bennet,” Phillip tells me over my shoulder, standing behind me. Runs his hands along my shoulders, smoothing out the wrinkled fabric. “One sexy son of a bitch.”
“I’d fuck you,” Blaine decides out loud.
“I’d fuck you, too,” I tell him.
“I’d fuck both of you,” Phillip chimes in loudly. “And I’d fuck myself.” He runs a palm slowly down his bicep, admiring his arms in the mirror.”
― Sara Ney, Bachelor Society