I Am Ozzy Quotes

“Hating people isn’t a productive way of living. So what’s the point in hating anyone? There’s enough hate in the world as it is, without me adding to it.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“That night, at God knows what hour, Bill phoned me up and shouted, ‘Ozzy, I think my
house is haunted!’
‘Sell tickets then,’ I told him, and put the phone down.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“It had a huge impact on me, ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’ – and I was very proud when I found out that Kurt Cobain was a fan of mine. I thought he was awesome.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I’m a lunatic by nature, and lunatics don’t need training – they just are.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“My father always said I would do something big one day.‘I’ve got a feeling about you, John Osbourne,’ he’d tell me, after he’d had a few beers.‘You’re either going to do something very special, or you’re going to go to prison.’
And he was right, my old man.

I was in prison before my eighteenth birthday.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“You learn who your friends are when the shit hits the fan.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“When you’re in love, it’s not just about the messing around in the sack, it’s about how empty you feel when they’re gone.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I used to get upset by people not understanding me, but I’ve made a career out of it now.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“What can go wrong will go wrong.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I remember saying to Tony [Iommi], ‘Did you hear how heavy that Led Zeppelin album sounded?’
Without missing a beat, he replied, ‘We’ll be heavier.’”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“The Jesus freaks were the worst. While the ‘Suicide Solution’ case was going through the courts they followed me around everywhere. They would picket my shows with signs that read, ‘The Anti-Christ Is Here’. And they’d always be chanting: ‘Put Satan behind you! Put Jesus
in front of you!’
One time, I made my own sign – a smiley face with the words ‘Have a Nice Day’ – and went out and joined them. They didn’t even notice. Then, just as the gig was about to start, I put down the sign, said, ‘See ya, guys,’ and went back to my dressing room.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“Pink Floyd was music for rich college kids, and we were the exact f**king opposite of that.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“They said I would never write this book.
Well, f**k ’em – ’cos here it is.
All I have to do now is remember something...
Bollocks. I can’t remember anything.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“It’s sad, y’know, what money does to people.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“The funny thing is, I was never much of a fighter. Better a live coward than a dead hero, that was my motto.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“The power of people, when they focus on something positive, never fails to amaze me.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“The funny thing is, I’m actually quite interested in the Bible, and I’ve tried to read it several times. But I’ve only ever got as far as the bit about Moses being 720 years old, and I’m like, `What were these people smoking back then?’ The bottom line is I don’t believe in a bloke called God in a white suit who sits on a fluffy cloud any more than I believe in a bloke called the Devil with a three-pronged fork and a couple of horns. But I believe that there’s day, there’s night, there’s good, there’s bad, there’s black, there’s white. If there is a God, it’s nature. If there’s a Devil, it’s nature.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“The most unbelievable thing about my behaviour is that I was convinced it was entirely f**king normal.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I don’t know whose brilliant idea that was, but it wasn’t mine, that’s for sure.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“You can never take the violence back.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I grew up having to piss in a bucket ’cos there was no indoor shitter, and now I have these computerised Japanese super-loo things that have heated seats and wash and blow-dry your arse at the touch of a button. Give it a couple of years and I’ll have a bog with a robot arm that pulls out my turds, so I don’t have to strain.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“You’ve got to try and take things to the next level, or you’ll just get stuck in a rut.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“They teach you how to handle life in England, but they don’t teach you a thing about death. There’s no book telling you what to do when your mum or dad dies.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“All these polo-necked wankers from grammar schools were going out and buying songs like ‘San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Some Flowers in Your Hair)’. Flowers in your hair? Do me a f**king favour.
[...]
Who gave a dog’s arse about what people were doing in San Francisco, anyway? The only flowers anyone saw in Aston were the ones they threw in the hole after you when you croaked it at the age of fifty-three ’cos you’d worked yourself to death.
I hated those hippy-dippy songs, man.
Really hated them.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“In 1964 something totally unexpected happened.
I got a job I enjoyed.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“‘Ozzy, why do you drink so much? What’s the point?’
The right answer to that question was: because I’m an alcoholic; because I have an addictive personality; because whatever I do, I do it addictively. But I didn’t know any of that back then.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“I don’t remember where we first played ‘Black Sabbath’, but I can sure as hell remember the audience’s reaction: all the girls ran out of the venue, screaming.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“Day one, the van broke down. It was so cold the accelerator cable froze, so when Tony [Iommi] put his foot down it snapped in half. Which meant we were stranded in the middle of f**king nowhere, halfway to Copenhagen. There was a blizzard outside, but Tony said it was my job – as the band’s ‘public representative’ – to go and find some help. So out I walked into this field, snow blowing into my face, two icicles of snot hanging out of my nose, until finally I saw the lights of a farmhouse up ahead. Then I fell into a trench. After finally pulling myself out of the f**king thing, I waded through the snow until I reached the front door, then knocked loudly.
‘Halløj?’ said the big, red-faced Eskimo bloke who opened the door.
‘Oh, thank f**k,’ I said.
[...]
‘Halløj?’
I didn’t know any Danish, so I pointed towards the road, and said, ‘Van. El kaputski. Ya?'”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“‘And what about a [band] name?’ said Tony [Iommi]. The three of us looked at each other.
‘We should all take a couple of days to think about it,’ I said. ‘I dunno about you two, but I’ve got a special place where I go to get ideas for important stuff like this. It’s never failed me yet.’

Forty-eight hours later I blurted out: ‘I’ve got it!’
‘Must have been that dodgy bird you poked the other night,’ said Geezer. ‘Has your whelk turned green yet?’
Tony and Bill snickered into their plates of egg and chips. We were sitting in a greasy spoon caff in Aston. So far, everyone was getting along famously.
‘Very funny, Geezer,’ I said, waving an eggy fork at him. ‘I mean the name for our band.’
The snickering died down.
‘Go on then,’ said Tony [Iommi].
‘Well, I was on the shitter last night, and...'
‘That’s your special place?’ spluttered Bill, blobs of mushed-up egg and HP sauce flying out of his mouth.
‘Where the f**k did you think it was, Bill?’ I said. ‘The hanging gardens of f**king Babylon?”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy

“Yes, I’m the crazy rock’n’roller who bit the head off a bat and pissed on the Alamo, but I also have a son who likes to mess around with the settings on my telly, so when I make myself a nice pot of tea, put my feet up, and try to watch a programme on the History Channel, I can’t get the f**king thing to work. That kind of stuff blew people’s minds. I think they had this idea in their heads that when I wasn’t being arrested for public intoxication, I went to a cave and hung upside down, drinking snakes’ blood. But I’m like Coco the Clown, me: at the end of the day, I come home, take off my greasepaint and my big red nose, and become Dad.”
― Ozzy Osbourne, I Am Ozzy