Divergent Mind Quotes

“Despite what the words "attention deficit" imply, ADHD is not a deficit of attention, but rather a challenge of regulating it at will or on demand.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“There is a sense that a particular neurodivergence does not make people inherently disabled, but they feel disabled because of the generally overstimulating environments of dominant neurotypical culture and settings.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Many women latch onto language from popular psychology, such as "panic attack," when often they are instead experiencing sensory overwhelm.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“What happens when we stop pathologizing difference?”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“High stimulation is both exciting and confusing for people with ADHD, because they can get overwhelmed and overstimulated easily without realizing they are approaching that point.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“The world will benefit significantly from talents such as empathy, emotional intensity, certitude, sensitivity, ability to detect details, depth of thought, will to embrace, and many other things that we need in a time where alienation, coldness, superficiality, and emotional hardness are predominating.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“It's no wonder that we women walk around with unnecessary amounts of shame, guilt, depression, and anxiety. Our reality has not been properly validated.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Having a sensitive nervous system is normal,” Aron writes in The Highly Sensitive Person, “[it’s] a basically neutral trait.” In the book she details what the trait is, how to figure out whether you possess it, and ways to handle heightened sensitivity and overstimulation in a world that is often too fast, too bright, too loud, and simply too much. “What seems ordinary to others, like loud music or crowds, can be highly stimulating and thus stressful for HSPs.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Europeans never wanted to show too much emotion or be too expressive or joyful or exuberant because it would blur the divide between colonizers and colonized.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“In fact, many people in the autistic community like to flip the script and point out how awful neurotypical culture and expectations are: think small talk, social niceties, herd mentality, compliance, and other unpleasant or taxing behaviors that are deemed “normal.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“There’s really nothing right or wrong about people; we’re all just people doing our best.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“taking in vast amounts of information about one’s environment, including the people in it, and somatically processing all of that input.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Build on your strengths and be fearless.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“What is considered pathology is largely a construct and product of the times. Mental health specialists spend their careers carving out the precise parameters around certain “diagnoses,” and when two or more diagnoses start to overlap or run up against each other, people get territorial and defensive and protective. This may sound shocking or ridiculous, but it is true. So it is imperative that the language and vocabulary of neurodiversity—the understanding that there is a natural array of human brain makeups—begin to seep not only into the medical and psychiatric canon, but also into the everyday colloquial language of the public. We must ask, Why does the way you pay attention determine your work prospects and life satisfaction?”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Once we understand sensitivity, and its connection to neurodiversity, sensitive women no longer have to walk around with a hidden secret about what they know they feel and experience every day—taking in vast amounts of information about one’s environment, including the people in it, and somatically processing all of that input. The science has finally caught up with our real, lived experience, and we no longer need to hide in a closet for fear of being deemed “crazy,” overemotional, or not academic enough.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“My depth of curiosity, sensitivity, persistent wondering, and questioning—my insatiable hunger to know and understand—is not mirrored in the wider culture, even in academia.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“As we know by now, the lifelong effects of masking can be dangerously draining and hazardous to emotional, physical, and spiritual health.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“I think of sensitivity within ADHD as having two parts. First, there is a deep curiosity about and sensitivity to new information and stimuli, an experience not too different from that of a bee driven to discover all available pollen. Second, there is the sensitivity that results from being ADHD, especially if it’s been unknown, where people become sensitive to criticism and being judged. It’s hard to do well at some times and then at other times feel like a total failure—for being late, missing an appointment, missing a deadline, getting dates or times confused, or other results of having a challenged prefrontal cortex and struggling executive functioning. There is also a sensitivity to ourselves—our own emotions, regulating those emotions, and not being so hard on ourselves. It’s no surprise, then, that it is not uncommon for adults with ADHD to have meltdowns or “blowups”—like an adult tantrum.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“People there tolerate her communication style well, but Seager finds dealing with the outside, neurotypical world to be exhausting. It takes a huge amount of her emotional energy to think through everything before she speaks or acts. “It’s just tiring,” she says.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“ADHD is not a deficit of attention, but rather a challenge of regulating it at will or on demand. People with ADHD often have too much attention—just not at the “socially acceptable” times or situations found in our highly regimented and structured societies.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Nick Walker, is a notable neurodiversity author and scholar—and he lived just a few blocks away from me. At the same time, and thanks to Twitter’s algorithms, I found the tweets of author and neurodiversity expert Steve Silberman and started to delve into what would come to define the next few years of my life—an exploration and investigation of neurodiversity.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“I am deeply curious about the inner lives of others and understanding them—which often looks like asking a ton of questions (good thing I became a journalist),”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“In Women and Madness, Phyllis Chesler writes of what she calls “psychiatric imperialism,” whereby normal responses to trauma are methodically pathologized in science and medicine. At the time of the book’s publication in 1972, few women were coming forward about gender biases in the study and practice of psychology. Chesler felt compelled to bring forward a conversation around gender, race, class, and medical ethics because “modern female psychology reflects a relatively powerless and deprived condition.” Of sensitivity she writes: “Many intrinsically valuable female traits, such as intuitiveness or compassion, have probably been developed through default or patriarchal-imposed necessity, rather than through either biological predisposition or free choice. Female emotional ‘talents’ must be viewed in terms of the overall price exacted by sexism.” Regardless of causation, of note here is that women’s internal lives were barely acknowledged or considered.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Neurodiversity is a paradigm shift that empowers women to come forward”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Masking refers to an unconscious or conscious effort to hide and cover one’s own self from the world”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Surely the doctors who insisted that homosexuality was a disease were not all bigots or prudes. Nor are the doctors who today diagnose with Hoarding Disorder people who fill their homes with newspapers and empty pickle jars, but leave undiagnosed those who amass billions of dollars while other people starve, merely toadying to the wealthy.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“feelings of sadness as a child when I was in sterile suburbs or office buildings, or feelings of joyful awe when I was by the ocean.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Joffe says that most who come to her for depression or anxiety have never had their underlying sensory challenges addressed. And so simple interventions in nature, such as brief camping trips, can be just as helpful for adults as children because of how natural sounds help regulate the nervous system.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Yet another group is serial job hoppers. With each career, they reach a level of success where they feel they’ve mastered what they want and then get bored and move on. But they think something is wrong with them. “What we’ve found is that they need to find a job or career that is not static,” Malonai says, “or they need to have supplementary activities and hobbies. Or they have to be okay with the change and transition, but then there is the question of everyday life and paying bills.” Many of these women are likely ADHD and gifted,”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You

“Malonai shares an example of a highly sensitive, gifted, and anxious woman who can become preoccupied if she sees her boss give a big sigh. The woman wonders about her boss, “Is she having a bad day? Does she have a stomach ache? Is she crying? Is she sad? Is she tired?” Then she wonders, “Did I do something?” Malonai explains, “There’s a lot of doubt and a lot of insecurities.”
― Jenara Nerenberg, Divergent Mind: Thriving in a World That Wasn't Designed for You