Crimes of Cupidity Quotes

“Seeing the look in his eye, I shake my head. “Uh uh. I really am sleepy. No sexy times.” He laughs. “Sure.” I cross my arms. “I’m serious. My puss pearl is clammed up for the night. My tuna pot pie is already put away in the Tupperware. This fun hatch is closed for business, Evert.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“All is fair in love and war, bitches.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“I watch as Ronak gyrates his hips a bit, and I narrow my eyes. Is he…? Yep. He’s drawing a dick on the carpet with his urine. A piss dick pic. It’s actually kind of impressive.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“I watch him, equal parts horrified and entranced, as he continues to mack on the soap like he’s hoping it’ll sprout a cooter hole so that he can put his rising rod inside of it.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“You’ll do a lot of things for the ones you love. Even bad things. Good people are capable of bad choices, just like bad people are capable of good. There is no certainty when it comes to individuals.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Why are you all bruised up? Who fucking touched you? I’ll end them.” “I fell off a roof.” “I’ll end the fucking roof, then.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“she trails off with a pointed look to the left, and we follow her gaze to see Ronak who undoes his pants, grabs his junk, and pees all over the carpet. I pinch the bridge of my nose and shake my head. “Duru is gonna be so pissed,” I say. Then I snort at my own joke. I watch as Ronak gyrates his hips a bit, and I narrow my eyes. Is he…? Yep. He’s drawing a dick on the carpet with his urine. A piss dick pic. It’s actually kind of impressive. “Should I, umm, take him outside, my lady?” the servant asks nervously. Ronak chooses that moment to turn around full-frontal, flashing her with his impressive cooch cork. “Ronak!” I snap. “Put your shmecky away, that is not polite!”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“I missed him like pissing dudes miss the toilet bowl.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“When you’re on your period, you kinda always want to punch someone.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“How can females bleed this much without dying? We’re freaking warriors, Syl.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“This is the demon representative, Jerkahf.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Because love? It really is the greatest thing you can ever have. Trust me. I’m a cupid.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Sometimes we don’t understand why people do the things that they do. But he did do it, and so all that I can do to honor his decision is be grateful to him for his sacrifice.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“It’s a bit gratuitous and…evil? But what can you really expect from demons?”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“I wish I could smooth my hand across his beard and furrowed brow and let his strong arms protect me from the world, but I can’t. The world just won’t let us be, and I already knew it would come to this.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“And he does. Because my sweet genfin always takes care of me. Even when I’m being a feisty, raging, hormonal beast.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Fucking worst view ever,” Evert deadpans. I giggle from the look on his face as he decidedly looks away from Sylred’s ball sack that hangs over his head, but my giggle is cut off when Sylred grabs my head and pulls my mouth back over his cock again.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Darling, I’m a thief. I have everything you could ever need or want, and if I don’t, I can sure as hell get it.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Let’s go steal us a princess.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“To all the cupids, the matchmakers, the wallflowers, and the bridesmaids. It’s your turn.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“You son of a butt chunk! I’m gonna tie your limp dick in a knot if someone doesn’t give me a gods-damned orgasm!”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“And they say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Nope. It’s his dick.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Demons have possession parties twice a year. In the human realm, it’s once on Halloween and once on Tax Day.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Luck be a lady tonight, bitches.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“Tonight, I’m going to take care of you, Syl. Because you always take care of me.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity

“The thorns reminded me of the way your arrow pierced me so sweetly,” he says with a sigh. “And the pink blossom reminded me of your hair, and how it would look fanned out over my chest after an intense love-making session.”

I groan and bury my head in my hands.
“What. The. Actual. Fuck.”
― Raven Kennedy, Crimes of Cupidity