Glasgow Lads Quotes

“Adiós Motherfucker (blue curaçao mixed with every clear alcohol known to humankind).”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Liam’s amusement—as amused as he could be at the moment, considering no one had told him it was Treacherous Bastard Night at Hannigan’s.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“As always, a dozen or so people were gathered about the base of the Duke of Wellington statue. As always, the mounted Duke wore a traffic cone on his head, placed there by—well, someone—despite its daily removal by the police.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Robert wasn’t sure that trapping the four of them in a box for the entirety of a carnival ride was the best idea—though it seemed an interesting concept for a reality show—but he nodded and went along.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Andrew’s his best man—he’ll put on the world’s poshest stag do. They’ll be eating caviar off the abs of a high-priced rentboy, one wee dab on each part of his six-pack.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Liam’s prick gave a swift jerk, as though ready to unfasten itself from his body and hop on the Number 60 bus to accommodate Robert this moment. “You still there?”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“They say you’re heavily sedated, but that you might still be able to hear me. Which is also good, because talking to oneself is an eccentricity not currently in vogue.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Well, banter is one of the five Glaswegian stages of grief.” “And the other four?” “Alcohol, incoherent rage, more alcohol, and ever-deepening cynicism.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Oh, my beautiful city, I am so in love with you just now.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“I feel like there’s a fire-code violation going on down there.” He gestured to his trunks. “Such crowding can’t be healthy.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“The wars.” The word came out a strangled whisper. “Aye, they got attacked, but did they have to ruin the world?”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Then we take a deep dram.” He drained his glass, and John followed suit. “Then we order a few peasants shot in the face.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Then again, they do live in Scotland’s second-largest inhabited castle, so perhaps she simply couldn’t find him.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Floating Midges,” John repeated blearily. “That’d be a brilliant name for a football club.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3

“Each seven-minute episode was a mind-numbing eternity to John, who’d been raised on the madcap spectacle of Teletubbies.”
― Avery Cockburn, Glasgow Lads: Books 1-3