The Art of Communication Quotes

“Ambiverts typically . . .

• Can process information both internally and externally. They need time to contemplate on their own, but consider the opinions and wisdom from people whom they trust when making a decision.
• Love to engage and interact enthusiastically with others, however, they also enjoy calm and profound communication.
• Seek to balance between their personal time and social time, they value each greatly.
• Are able to move from one situation to the next with confidence, flexibility, and anticipation.

“Not everyone is going to like us or understand us. And that is okay. It may have nothing to do with us personally; but rather more about who they are and how they relate to the world.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“An ambivert navigates the introvert/extrovert spectrum with ease since they do not fit directly into either category. Since neither label applies to them, they are social chameleons who adapt to their environment to maximize their interaction and optimize their results.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Introverts typically . . .
• Process information internally. It is normal for them to continuously contemplate, generate, circulate, evaluate, question, and conclude.
• Are rejuvenated and energized by rest, relaxation, and down-time.
• Need time to process and adapt to a new situation or setting, otherwise it is draining.
• Tend to be practical, simple, and neutral in their clothing, furnishings, offices, and surroundings.
• Choose their friends carefully and focus on quality, not quantity. They enjoy the company of people who have similar interests and intellect.
• May resist change if they are not given enough notice to plan, prepare, and execute. Sudden change creates stress and overwhelm.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“UN-Impressives

• Lying.
• Bragging.
• Gossiping.
• Cursing and using foul language.
• Making self-deprecating comments.
• Regularly expressing worry and anxiety.
• Criticizing and condemning people and situations.
• Demonstrating a lack of emotional intelligence or compassion.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Your thoughts become your attitudes, which become your actions, which become your behavior, which become your habits, which become your lifestyle, and inevitably determine your outcomes. Utilize this circular truth by using positive thoughts to create positive outcomes. It is a choice you get to make every day. Choose wisely.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“It is generally believed that nearly 40 percent of your first impression will be set from the tone of your voice. Your vocal thermometer can be more impactful than the actual words you use.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“14 Ways to Become an Incredible Listener

1. Be present and provide your undivided attention.
2. Seek first to understand, then to be understood.
3. Listen attentively and respond appropriately.
4. Minimize or eliminate distractions.
5. Focus your attention and energy with singleness of purpose on what the other person is saying.
6. Quiet your mind and suspend your thoughts to make room in your head to hear what is said—in the moment!
7. Ask questions and demonstrate empathy.
8. Use your body language and nonverbal cues constructively and pay attention to theirs.
9. Follow the rhythm of their speech; hear their tone.
10. Repeat and summarize what you have heard them say to confirm understanding.
11. Be open-minded and non-defensive.
12. Respond rather than react.
13. Be respectful, calm, and positive.
14. Try to resolve conflicts, not win them.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Active listening is not only a matter of making yourself available to hear someone talk, but it is showing the sender, physically, that you are receiving and understanding their message on all levels.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“The Physical Language of Listening

Active listening is a physical process which transcends simply hearing. Your body language speaks on your behalf as to whether you are fully present and engaged . . .

• Make eye contact.
• Nod your head; confirm.
• Use your eyebrows and expressions of emotions to show that you're paying attention.
• Lean forward.
• Listen patiently to demonstrate respect and sensitivity.
• Open your physical presence to encourage them to continue.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“UN-Impressives of the Poor Listener

• Thinking about what you should have done, could have done, or need to do.
• Allowing your emotional reactions to take over.
• Interrupting the person talking.
• Replying before you hear all the facts.
• Jumping to conclusions and making assumptions.
• Being preoccupied with what you're going to say next.
• Getting defensive or being over-eager.
• One-upmanship—feeling the urge to compete and add something bigger, better, or more significant than what the speaker has to share.
• Imposing an unsolicited opinion.
• Ignoring and changing the subject altogether.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“To make matters even more complicated, research has shown that we remember only 25-50 percent of what we hear. This inclination not only compromises our connection with another person, but we can fail to retain vital information. All this evidence demonstrates that it is imperative that we intentionally pay closer attention and strive to become an in-depth listener.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“You can have the perfect message, but it may fall on deaf ears when the listener is not prepared or open to listening.
These listening "planes" were first introduced by the American composer Aaron Copland (1900-1990) as they pertain to music . . .

1. The Sensual Plane: You’re aware of the music, but not engaged enough to have an opinion or judge it.
2. The Expressive Plane: You become more engaged by paying attention, finding meaning beyond the music, and noticing how it makes you feel.
3. The Musical Plane: You listen to the music with complete presence, noticing the musical elements of melody, harmony, pitch, tempo, rhythm, and form.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“While active listening is crucial for optimal communication, we are faced with a dilemma which can perplex even the sincerest and engaged of individuals.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Through the years, I have heard that the average person speaks at about 150-160 words per minute, but can listen at a rate of about 1,000 words per minute. What is going on during all that extra mind time?

• Our minds are racing ahead and preparing for the next thing we are going to say.
• We are preoccupied with other thoughts, priorities, and distractions.
• Our subconscious filters are thumbing through our database of memories, judgments, experiences, perspectives, and opinions to frame how we are going to interpret what we think someone is saying.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Think of the communication that takes place in your own life on a continuous basis—at home, at work, with friends, and beyond. When you actively listen to people, you enhance communication.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“4 Steps for Understanding Each Other

1. Identify your beliefs and core values; ask how they determine your behaviors and habits.
2. Realize with whom you are interacting and try to identify how their values are explaining their behavior.
3. Assume positive intent.
4. Seek ways to adapt your behavior to help bridge the cultural gap.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“We will judge others based on their behaviors with little to no understanding or regard for their beliefs or values—standards we may not know, nor typically see. When we do this, things can be taken completely out of context because we are assessing their behavior against our expectations, which are produced from our own personal value system.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Being grounded in your lifelong culture and your personal perspective, you are comfortable with the way you see things and may believe it is the best and only way.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Our cultural lens is so much a part of us that we are not even aware of how obvious it is to others. Like the nose on your face, you may forget that it is there, but everyone else sees it. I can’t look at you and not see your nose.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Your encounters will be more successful when you slow down, pay attention, and become more mindfully aware of the world around you. Heightening your awareness in your social, situational, contextual, orientational, and cultural scenarios will improve your agility as you adapt to new social settings.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Don’t try to make a joke just to make a joke. Sometimes, as human beings, we so want to fit in and connect that we try TOO hard to be something we are not. It’s okay if you’re not the life of the party. It’s fine if you’re not a stand-up comedian. Just be you. Real life provides real humor when we’re paying attention to it. Share what makes you laugh.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Wise with Your Words.

Speak words that support your highest good. Are your thoughts building you up or tearing you down? Notice the quality of your words—your best first impressions ride on them.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Use Names.

Calling a person by name makes him/her feel recognized, appreciated, and special. It shows respect and that you are genuinely interested in making a connection. You make them feel remembered!”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Voice Value. Your voice makes a first impression. Is your voice coming across as smart, friendly, and positive or ignorant, rude, and negative? The way you deliver the words is your “vocal image.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Active Listening.

Practice this skill. You enhance communication; this confirms that the message another conveys is well received and thoroughly understood. You get it!”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Conversation Starters.

Your first words will not only shape your first impression, but they can create amazing connections, lead you to your dream job, or help you discover a new best friend.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Mindful Awareness.

Be fully involved in the moment—right now! Developing this ability instills a sixth sense for navigating connections. Be intentional and thoughtful; listen and care.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“An engaging conversation is a two-way street. Learn to delight in dialogue to ensure mutual respect and consideration.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“We’ve all known the proverbial conversation hog who dominates a discussion and pays little notice to another person’s input. They’re so busy talking about themselves, we can barely slide a word in edgewise. Don’t be that guy!”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact

“Delicious Dialogue

“We’ve all known the proverbial conversation hog who dominates a discussion and pays little notice to another person’s input. They’re so busy talking about themselves, we can barely slide a word in edgewise. Don’t be that guy!”

“An engaging conversation is a two-way street. Learn to delight in dialogue to ensure mutual respect and consideration.”
― Susan C. Young, The Art of Communication: 8 Ways to Confirm Clarity & Understanding for Positive Impact