Ren Quotes

“When we aren’t obligated to each other then we are more valuable. The couple who celebrates a marriage anniversary are only saying they have chosen appearances over choices. It’s about like celebrating your mortgage every year. Hur-fucking-ray, you’ve fulfilled your contract again. How bloody romantic.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“The forest in front of me is organic and untidy and in need of a serious manicure. The British would never keep their forest in such a sorry state, all overgrown and smelling of rot.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“Over here you’ll see San Fran is also host to a wide variety of exotic animals. Many find our streets to be like a modern rain forest,” she says, indicating a flock of flea-ridden pigeons pecking leftovers off a bum sleeping on the curb.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“You fuckers drag your imbecile asses around this planet, sucking up resources, terrorizing, and leaving your bloody trash for others to bury. You came here to see a shark or whale or a rattlesnake. Well, go out in the bloody world and see them in real life and not imprisoned for your enjoyment. And while you’re at it stop fucking around because I’m tired of watching the repugnant shit you all do.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“Zoos and aquariums with glass walls serve a purpose but they also teach ignorant fuckers that they are better because we aren’t the ones being held captive. When was it ever our right because we have opposable thumbs to put God’s animals on permanent display in every major city in the world? We might be saving a few, but we wouldn’t have to save any if we weren’t fucking up the whole planet.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“I’m fairly certain the state of California wants its residents to die. Why else make curvy roads with no guardrails on the side of a cliff with zero shoulder? One false move and we’re plummeting over the edge and into the rocky Pacific. Yay for bloody vacations and adventures.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“Toddlers really are daft with their inexperience and lack of communication skills. They all need to fucking grow up.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“The bistro’s menu would have no real hearty options, just leeks sautéed in truffle oil and cheese that smells like feet and is drizzled in a reduction of bullshit. Foodies should all be dropped off in Ethiopia where their pretentious drivel will have them being roasted over a pit by the locals in no time.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“The government just isn’t happy unless it’s telling us how to sit, what to eat, and how much of our salary to give them. God fucking forbid I get a splinter in my finger. Then they shut up and tell me I’m not any of their business.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“I’m more comfortable in high heels. Commoners wear flats. People like me need to be elevated.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“If I don’t keep kicking the child’s legs out from under him then he will be walking in no time. Then there will be no peace.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“There’s four million people in this godforsaken city. In that population there are a zillion hipsters who don’t know how to drive. There’s also a bunch of sleazy car salesmen who sell the American dream as an SUV on steroids. Then there is a city planning department who makes parking spaces extra small and highways that encourage collisions. And a slew of automobile body repair shops who sit back and laugh at all the repugnant socialites who lose most of their lives sitting in traffic, getting their cars repaired and their terriers groomed.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“We left an hour ago and have cleared less than twenty miles. Oh, the bliss of living in Los-fucking-Angeles.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“The future is a product of the demons we lay to rest. Get over the past to enjoy what’s to come.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“Past, present and future are three parts of the whole, constantly intertwined and shifting as we change and grow.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure

“Most people just don’t know any better because logic isn’t engrained into our culture. Convenience and greed are the staples of our society.”
― Sarah Noffke, Ren: The Monster's Adventure