Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings Quotes

“So while you can’t control your children, you can control someone who has a tremendous influence on how your children relate to each other. You.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“Since parents are the role model, you’ll hear your child speak to his sister or brother using your words and tone of voice. Children”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“All misbehavior is a cry for help or connection. Respond to the need, and the behavior will change. If a child isn’t meeting our expectations, she needs more support to do so, whether that’s teaching, connection, or help in working through the emotions that are getting in her way. Much of what we consider “misbehavior” is normal childishness and can be “corrected” simply through loving guidance.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“To help children with emotions, we first need to understand that once we let ourselves feel an emotion, it begins to dissipate.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“From your child’s perspective, discipline isn’t the way you teach her appropriate behavior. Rather, your child correctly sees discipline as the way you handle conflict when family members get upset or have conflicting desires. In other words, the way you discipline your child becomes her model for working out interpersonal problems. So punishment, which is the use of force, teaches her to use force against her siblings whenever there’s a problem to be solved.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“babies’ brains build the neural pathways to soothe their upsets every time you soothe them.9 Simply by comforting your baby or toddler when she’s upset, you prompt her body to release calming biochemicals and strengthen her future ability to soothe herself—the most fundamental emotional intelligence skill.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“Are you wondering if some misbehavior is simply the child doing what he wants? Of course it is! But in that case, it’s a symptom that the child considers his connection to you less important than doing what he wants. So the relationship needs strengthening, or the child needs help with the emotions that are keeping him from connecting with you. When a child trusts that we’re really on his side, he’s willing to give up doing what he wants, to do something he wants more—which is to stay positively connected to us. If you think about it, that’s the definition of self-discipline—giving up something you want (that piece of cake) for something you want more (your health and fitness). So”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“Punishment teaches fear. Kids learn what they live and what you model. If kids do what you want because they fear you, it’s a small step to bullying. If you yell, they’ll yell. If you use force, they’ll use force. Against anyone they can, including their sibling.”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life

“when he gave her those overzealous hugs, how to handle”
― Laura Markham, Peaceful Parent, Happy Siblings: How to Stop the Fighting and Raise Friends for Life