The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs Quotes

“don't let jesus in. AA is just one obsession replaced with another”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Since he was sixteen, he had been continuously sexually active, either with a girlfriend or through a series of casual flings. From the point of someone like Kibby, he considered, he would be regarded as highly succesful with women.

But the real problem is relationships, which fucking social retards like Kibby can't grasp, because they're just so obsessed with getting their hole.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“She's nothing to do with my shit, but fuck it, none of us are saints and scapegoats are always handy.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“I wouldn't care about hurting myself or anybody else. Because I know now that doing things doesn't hurt you; you get hurt by avoiding them”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Everything is muffled and car-crash-like and I want to speak but she's looking through me and I'm looking through alcohol. We're nowhere near each other even as we stumble in tandem through our disintegrating lives.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Prawdziwy dżentelmen nigdy nie dąży do wyruchania dziewczyny na pierwszej randce (chyba, że nie planuje drugiej).”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“She's lovely and she's with Skinner, and they're probably in love and there's no justice in this world”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Perché adesso so che fare le cose non ti ferisce:resti ferito se le eviti.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Was he an alcoholic? What was that? Someone who drinks all the time? Who can't say no to a drink? Who drinks in secret? Somebody who anticipates the next drink before he's finished with the one in front of him?”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“USA. The land of the free; where you accent didn’t matter. But he supposed everybody related to it; movies, TV, fat-food, outlets, you grew up with it. Cultural imperialism. Yet no wonder everybody increasingly hated it: it was stupid, self-serving and so in-your-face that it was setting itself up to be despised”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“«Che c'è?» gli chiese Kibby, notando il suo sorriso contemplativo.
«Stavo solo pensando che se cadessi in una botte con le Corrs nude, finiresti con il chitarrista che ti ciuccia l'uccello» sghignazzò Skinner.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“It’s like humping Leviathan: a fucking war of all against all, a shag of attrition. Eventually she goes off and I shoot my load and, save for a shaving of egotism, am completely unmoved by the experience. […] Contemplating the girl beneath me, I know that she could never be my friend. Her gasps as she came sounded like mocking laughter, as empty and pointless as I feel inside. Not only have I forgotten her name, I can’t remember if I ever asked it or if she bothered telling me. Prabaly not.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“It was all that vain, egotistical insincerity of self-reproach. By blaming ourselves we take away the right of others to do the same”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“We may feel more sorry for the sad, self-loathing alcoholic than the bombastic one who thinks the whole world is out of step bar him, but by and large they're the same creature.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Skinner nodded thoughtfully, then regaining his composure contended, - I've got to say that with the book, it was the shagging bits that interested me most.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Skinner nodded thoughtfully, then regaining his composure contended, - I've got to say that with the book, it was the snagging bits that interested me most.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs

“Skinners guts were in turmoil from the beer and curry at the weekend and a viscous, silent eye-stinging killer of a fart slipped out of him, as poignantly weeping as a lover's last farewell, just as the lift stopped at the next floor to let in two men wearing overalls. Everybody suffered in silence. As the workmen got off at the following level, Skinner seized the opportunity, announcing, - That is minging, looking towards the departing workers. He knew that when it came to farting everybody turned into Old Etonian High Court Judges. Men would always be suspected before women and men in working clothes would always be blamed before men in suits. Those were the rules.”
― Irvine Welsh, The Bedroom Secrets of the Master Chefs