Hollywood Said No! Quotes

“That ship has not only sailed but has been dry-docked and turned into a museum.”
― Bob Odenkirk, Hollywood Said No!: Orphaned Film Scripts, Bastard Scenes, and Abandoned Darlings from the Creators of Mr. Show

“Scientist Welsh is holding some soil in his hand, pours it into a container. The ＥＸＥＣＵＴＩＶＥＳ burst in.

ＴＯＤＤ
Dr. Welsh, these cave-ins are getting worse.

ＪＡＮＥ
Can't we put something in the holes, to fill it in?

ＤＲ．  ＷＡＬＳＨ
Yes, yes. The best thing I can devise is this foam. It hardens, and can support as much weight as dirt.

ＴＯＤＤ
Oh. Great.


They seem relieved. Then…


ＲＯＮ
Why don't we just build our new planet out of that foam?

ＤＲ．  ＷＡＬＳＨ
Well it's poisonous.


No reaction.


ＲＯＮ
Also it costs more than dirt.

ＡＬＬ
Ahhhh.


BEAT.

ＲＯＮ
What's the main ingredient?

ＤＲ．  ＷＡＬＳＨ
Poison foam.”
― Bob Odenkirk, Hollywood Said No!: Orphaned Film Scripts, Bastard Scenes, and Abandoned Darlings from the Creators of Mr. Show

“ＤＯＮ
…send the ambassador to Cuba, and firmly remind them that democracy is America's number one export.”
― Bob Odenkirk, Hollywood Said No!: Orphaned Film Scripts, Bastard Scenes, and Abandoned Darlings from the Creators of Mr. Show