Friedman's Fables Quotes

“MORAL: The grass is only greener when you're not caring for your own lawn.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables

“All could see the holly now bristling green. From every cut and wound and point from which a parted limb had gone, a hundred prickly, scorning tongues.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables

“It is not only their own destinies that each sees as ruled by the other; they even view their own being similarly. Neither seems capable of taking responsibility for personal desires, loves, or hates. Each sees the other as causing his or her own pain. Ironically, they thus each give their partner great power to guilt the other.

There seems to be no strength in the family at all, by which I mean the capacity of some member to say, I am me, this is where I stand. I end here and you begin there, etc.

It may be this constant expectation that the other should be his keeper that prevents each from taking responsibility for himself.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables

“It is not only their own destinies that each sees as ruled by the other; they even view their own being similarly. Neither seems capable of taking responsibility for personal desires, loves, or hates. Each sees the other as causing his or her own pain. Ironically, they thus each give their partner great power to guilt the other.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables

“One of the less subtle animals in the forest, more uncouth in expression was overheard to remark, “I never heard of anything so ridiculous. If you want a lamb and a tiger to live in the same forest, you don’t try to make them communicate. You cage the bloody tiger.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables

“The lamb could not take living in the forest with the tiger anymore so she went to the other animals in the woods and said good-bye. Her friends would not hear of it.

“Surely this whole thing can be worked out. We’re all reasonable here. Stay calm. There is probably just some misunderstanding that can easily be resolved if we all sit down together and communicate.”

The lamb, however, had several misgivings about such a meeting. First of all, if her friends had explained away the tiger’s behavior by saying it was simply a tiger’s nature to behave that way, why did they now think that as a result of communication the tiger would be able to change that nature?

Second, thought the lamb, such meetings, well intentioned as they might be, usually try to resolve problems through compromise. Now, while the tiger might agree to growl less, and indeed might succeed in reducing some of its aggressive behavior, what would she, the lamb, be expected to give up in return? Be more accepting of the tiger’s growling? There was something wrong, thought the lamb, with the notion that an agreement is equal if the invasive creature agrees to be less invasive and the invaded one agrees to tolerate some invasiveness.”
― Edwin H. Friedman, Friedman's Fables