Firecracker Quotes

“The world turned and flung me.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“You know power is the best thing in the world because as soon as you have it, everyone is trying to take it from you.
No one is ever trying to take your friends away, so that's how you know they're less important.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“I had never owned a pair of jeans, and I didn't plan on it. I'm not a cowboy, a farmer, or a 1950s greaser.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“You're a real firecracker, Astrid, aren't you?" Firecracker is what people in certain social circles say when what they really mean is asshole.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“Survival isn't a race. It's a dance.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“Things were about to change. If nothing changed, I wouldn't be writing this down because this is a book about the time when everything changed. And isn't that what every book is about? No, seriously, isn't it? I don't read books.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“Aren't you not allowed to be the psychologist of someone you know? I mean, I don't even know if you're a real doctor."

"Before teaching, I did this as a profession. And I keep my license current. You are no longer one of my students, so it's not unethical. And yes, I am a real doctor."

He pointed to a wall of framed diplomas. I wondered if anyone had ever closely looked at that wall. There were way more diplomas than he could've possibly earned. Nobody could go to that many schools. Eventually, I realized that some of the documents weren't even diplomas. They were more like certificates. One of them said that he was Camper of the Week at something called Happy Time Day Camp in 1961.

"Well, not a real doctor," I pointed out. "A PhD isn't a real doctor."

"A PhD is very much a real doctor." He pursed his lips together.

"My cousin Gretchen has a PhD in Performance Studies. I went to her to get my appendix taken out, and you know what happened?"

He rolled his eyes. "What happened, Astrid?"

"I died.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker

“Its seven o'clock," Dean Rein said.

"Fantastic," I replied, "And to think, just yesterday at this time it was also seven o'clock. What a roller coaster life is."

"Our appointment was for six."

"I had to go to Pierre's."

"Really?" he asked, raising his eyebrow. "A relationship is a good step for you."

"Ew. No. It was just one of his cries for help, but the noose broke the ceiling fan and he hurt his knees."

"My god, Astrid.”
― David Iserson, Firecracker