When the Moon Hits Your Eye Quotes

“I’m a former philosophy professor. We’re professionally not sure of anything.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“We are pattern-seeking animals, and we want and expect things to happen for a reason. When no reason is available, we will still provide one.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Possibly,' Hannah said. 'And what about your metaphorical moon project here, Damian? Is it also a comedy?'

'No, of course not,' Bardfield-Saling replied. 'That would be the entirely wrong scaffolding for such a story.'

'I'm happy to hear you say that,' Hannah admitted.

'It would be a musical,' Bardfield-Saling said.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“I never believed the universe was rational,” Clyde said. “I’ve lived in it too long for that.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Just because we want an explanation—just because we need an explanation—doesn’t mean the universe is obliged to provide one.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“No one’s richer than Scrooge McDuck,” Peter said. “Wrong,” Mackie said. “He’s worth, like, fifty billion, tops.” “There was a comic where he said that if he spent a billion dollars a minute, he’d be broke in six hundred years, which would put his worth in the mid quadrillions,” Peter said. “And that was in the seventies. It might be in the quintillions now with inflation.” “He’s self-reporting,” Cyrus said. “You can’t trust rich people to honestly tell you what they’re worth. Even a duck.” “Especially a duck,” Lisa chimed in, for the hell of it. “Realistically,” Mackie said, “he’s worth about fifty billion.” “Realistically, for a cartoon duck,” Peter said.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“I go to work every day because I don’t know what the hell else to do right now. But I don’t trash someone else’s life. That won’t make my life better. It just makes someone’s else’s life worse.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“I can’t tell you any more than that, because I wasn’t told any more than that,” Gable replied. “If I knew more, I would tell you. Probably not on the phone. It’s not secure.” “I’ll be sure not to tell you about the Diana astronaut chat group.” “Tell me it’s on an encrypted messaging app.” LeMae said nothing.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“What does ‘curse of the gifted kid’ mean?” “It means that when you’re a gifted kid, everything is easy, until it isn’t, and then when it isn’t, you get really frustrated, really fast,” Marc said. “Ask me how I know about that.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“it’s not fair to the American public, whose tax dollars fund a space program that its government, in its wisdom, has decided to farm out largely to billionaires whose interest in space is to have bragging rights over other billionaires, or to make an escape hatch to Mars so they don’t have to care how much they crap on the planet the rest of us call home.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Not a great week to be a scientist or a believer in a rational universe.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“What does ‘curse of the gifted kid’ mean?” “It means that when you’re a gifted kid, everything is easy, until it isn’t, and then when it isn’t, you get really frustrated, really fast,”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Everyone has a last time for everything, part of his brain told him. Yes, well, but that was the thing. Usually you wouldn’t know. You could say goodbye to a friend and not know it was the last time. You could tie your shoe and not know it was the last time. Now, coming to the end of things, Dayton realized what a comfort that actually was. When you know something is for the last time, it weighs on you. The moment becomes about the moment, and how you meet it, and how you leave it. It becomes a thing. When you don’t know, you can just … tie your shoe. Or hug your friend. And just have it be that. Dayton was pretty sure he liked it that way better.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“The three boys came through the other side of puberty still profoundly nerdy, with all the social and sartorial baggage that implied, while Lisa developed into a conventionally attractive person of reasonable social skills. When high school came around she had the option to “trade up” in cliques. She gave it an exploratory go, but found the lunchtime and after-school conversational topics of other cliques enervating. Also, as someone whose sexuality so far had expressed itself as “possibly asexual or maybe just unimpressed with the local talent,” she was happy to hang out with friends who wouldn’t, in fact, try to shove a tongue down her throat or a hand up her shirt. The boys weren’t asexual, but they had long ago sorted her into “sister” territory in their brains, and Lisa was perfectly fine with that.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“I have a briefing with the president in exactly half an hour, and because we all know he doesn’t bother to read the daily intelligence briefing, it will fall to me to explain what the hell is going on. So explain it to me. Use small words on me so I can use smaller words on him. Somebody start.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“I like a good aged cheddar as much as anyone,” Gable said. “But the moon is over four billion years old. That might be too aged even for me.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“All I have to say is, it better not be the end times, I’m getting married in three weeks. I don’t want to honeymoon during the apocalypse.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Be imperfect, Lessa Sarah. You deserve it.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“at the $1.50 pizza joint on West Fourteenth. It had been a 99 cent pizza joint when he moved in, but inflation was kicking everyone’s ass these days.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“the moon is exactly where it should be in its orbit, and also, its surface is three hundred miles closer to us. Which means that the diameter of the moon is roughly six hundred miles wider than it was before roughly five p.m. Eastern time yesterday.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Rockets should not burn when they are not supposed to. As rules at NASA went, this was pretty high up there.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Clyde took a drink of his coffee, which, like all the coffee he had ever had at the Short Stack, was a dark, percolated slap to the face, which is why he drank it.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“If Clyde can't pontificate, he gets mentally constipated.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“noting that Moon is what I consider the final installment of a very loose conceptual trilogy of novels that also includes The Kaiju Preservation Society and Starter Villain. The books share no characters, nor do they exist in the same universe, and none of them can be considered a prequel, sequel or sidequel to any of the others. They are standalone novels that can be read by themselves. What they do share, however, is a similar conceit of “Everyday people dealing with an extremely high-concept situation, in contemporary settings,”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“The Blob,” Hannah repeated. “Film from the fifties. Starred Steve McQueen.” This got a blank look from Powell and Santiago. “And there was a remake in the eighties. Directed by Frank Darabont.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Scorsese’s Bringing Out the Dead.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“reboot of the classic Space: 1999 television series from ITV, in which the moon was knocked from its orbit.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Are you sure?” Alton said. “Of course not,” Clyde said. “I’m a former philosophy professor. We’re professionally not sure of anything.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“What’s the point of knowing people if you can’t use them for favors?” Cassie said.”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye

“Eduardo: DO IT IN PERSON YOU UNBELIEVABLE PASTRY FORK OF A MAN”
― John Scalzi, When the Moon Hits Your Eye