Swamp Spies Quotes

“There’s evidence knowing and there’s being a woman in a relationship knowing. It’s my contention that most women’s relationship intuition is just as good as a video when it comes to a cheating husband, but that won’t exactly stand up in court.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“She’s a floating steak as far as that gator is concerned,” a man said.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“All she had on underneath was her birthday suit. Minnie’s passed a lot of birthdays but never a birthday cake, if you know what I mean.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“Remember that Easter when him and Hooch set all those rabbits loose in the Catholic church?” Gertie said. “And then they started having sexy time, right there in the sanctuary. Some of the older women passed out and Father Michael, who was already three sheets to the wind before service started, tried to give one of the rabbits Communion wine.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“So how are you two feeling?” Ida Belle, who looked as she had every day since I’d known her, nodded. “Feeling great. Had a good night’s sleep. This morning, I got my laundry done, washed the SUV, and cleaned out my deep freezer.” “I got out of bed,” Gertie said.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“But life experience has taught me that my mental health depends on not worrying or dwelling on things I can’t control.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“You’re probably going to have to sell the house and move,” Gertie said. I nodded. “Thank God cats don’t have opposable thumbs.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies

“Francis perched right on the nun’s head and said, “The power of Christ compels me.”
― Jana Deleon, Swamp Spies