A Demon and His Witch Quotes

“I know all about insanity. It's not that bad once you beat up everyone who teases you about it.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“what is your type? No wait. Let me guess. Hard, plastic coated and jammed full of big D batteries.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Her jaw worked, however nothing but a shocked stutter came out. "You, you--"
-"Hot piece of demon ass?"
-"No."
-"Brave soldier of Hell?"
-"No!"
-"Number one panty-dropper in the Pit?”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“-Are you always this crass?"
-"What can I say?" he replied spreading his hands wide with a beaming smile. "You bring out the best in me. Although, I'd prefer to sink my best into you," he winked.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“-If you're so badass, how come I never heard of you?"
-"I prefer to stay out of the spotlight, unlike some sorceresses I know," she said with a smile as she came to stop in front of him."But I do have a nickname."
-"Hot on a stick?"
-"No."
-"Spanks with magic?"
-"Most definitely not."
-"I know, you must be the famous BJ Swallows."
-"I am going to hurt you.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“-Pig.
-I prefer the term rutting beast.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“-"I am really starting to dislike you."
-"You know what they say: dislike is akin to lust."
-"That's not the expression."
-"It is in my world. You wouldn't be the first one to tell me you hate me only to rip my clothes off and ride me like a wild cowgirl.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Lucifer snapped his fingers and froze them. He didn’t really care what they did to each other, but he’d spent several months in the wild capturing the beast he’d turned into a desk. “Children, children,” he said tucking his hands behind his back and adopting his father figure mode. It usually made his daughter, Muriel, laugh. “Must I remind you that I tasked you with a mission. One that I might add, Ysabel, you should be most eager to complete. What I do not need, is for you to FUCK IT UP!” He let his voice increase in treble until it boomed. “I’ve been more than tolerant, but enough is enough. You will cease bringing me your petty squabbles. You will do the job I assigned. And if you don’t want his tongue in your mouth, Ysabel, then bite it off. Although, really, if you enjoyed it so much, I don’t see what the problem is. Maybe he can help you remove the stick up your ass if you let him kiss the other end. Now, if we’re done here, and since I’m boss, and I say we are, leave and don’t come back until you’re done, because if you do, I’m duct taping the pair of you together and throwing you in a dark room until you learn to get along. Or fuck. I don’t really care which, but I prefer the latter so I can watch.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Ysabel probably shouldn't have giggled as he pulled himself from the pool, water streaming from him in thick rivulets. But really, what did he expect? Groping her while she drove, making her all hot and distracted. The jerk. He should count himself lucky. Most guys would've ended up splattered on the sidewalk. Maybe she didn't hate him after all.
Hair plastered to his skull, dripping like a big sea monster, he glowered at her. "You are an evil witch."
Fluffing her hair she smiled. "Why thank you. I try my best.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Tall, way taller than her five foot five frame, his body bulged with muscles covered in tanned skin. He possessed layered down brown hair with gold highlights, vivid turquoise eyes and chiseled features, including a strong straight nose--surprising because with a taunting mouth like his she expected he'd gotten it broken more than once in his life--a square chin, and wickedly full lips that now quirked into a grin.
-"Enjoying the view?" he taunted.
-"Deciding what part to carve off your body first," she replied."Do you have a name by the way? Or should I just refer to you as 'that asshole'?"
-"You can call me Remy, but when I get your thighs around my neck, feel free to call me God. It totally pisses Lucifer's brother off, which means brownie points for me.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“In her eyes, he could see the fear, but also the love. The need. Time to show her, that to him, she meant everything.
“Before you shower me with kisses for saving you –”
“I think it could be argued that I played a part.”
“Not when I retell the story you won’t. But we can argue about that later, naked. As I was saying, I have something for you.” Remy pulled the sheet of paper out of his back pocket and unfolded it.
Initially he’d worried about it being too short. But as Lucifer assured him when he made the contract and binding, the less clauses he put in, the more his promise would stick out. Handing it to her, he waited.
Fidgeted when she didn’t say a word. Almost tore it from her grasp. Then stumbled back as she threw herself at him.

I, Remy, the most awesome demon in Hell, do declare to love the witch Ysabel, fiery temper and all, for an eternity. I will never stray. Never betray her trust. Never do anything to cause her pain upon penalty of permanent death.
This I do swear in blood,
Remy

A simple contract, which in its very lack of clauses and sub items, awed her. “You love me that much?”
He peered at her with incredulity on his face. “Of course I love you that much. Would I have done all the things I did if I didn’t?”
“Well, you are related to a mad woman.”
“Yes, and maybe it’s madness for me to love you, but I do. Do you think just any woman would inspire me enough to take on a bloody painful curse. Or put up with the fact you have a giant, demon eating cat. I know you have trust issues, and that I might not have led the kind of life that inspires confidence, but I will show you that you can believe in me. I want you to love me.”
“I know you do. And I do love you. Only for you would I come to the rescue wearing nothing to cover my bottom.”
His eyebrows shot up. “You came to battle in a skirt without any underwear?”
A slow nod was her answer.
He grinned, then scowled. “You will not do that again. Do you know how many demons live in the sewer and could have looked up your skirt? I won’t have them looking at what’s mine. On second thought. Throw out all your underwear. I’ll lead the purge on the sewers myself so you can stroll around with your girl parts unencumbered for my enjoyment.”
“You’re insane,” she laughed.
“Crazy in love with you,” he agreed. “But I do warn you, we’ll have to have dinner with my crazy mother at least once a month.”
“Or more often. I quite like your mom. She’s got a refreshing way of viewing the world.”
“Oh fuck. Don’t tell me she’s already rubbing off,” he groaned, as he pulled her into his arms.
She snuggled against him. This was where she belonged. But she did have a question. “As my new… what should I call you anyway? Boyfriend? Demon I sleep with?”
“The following terms are acceptable to me. Yours. Mate. Husband. Divine taster of your –”
She slapped a hand over his mouth. “I’ll stick to mate.”
“And I’m going with my super, sexy, touch her and die, fabulous cougar, ass kicking witch.”
“I dare you shout that five times in a row without stumbling.”
He did to her eye popping disbelief. “I told you, I have a very agile tongue.”
“I remember.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Why are you doing this? I don’t want you. Is that the problem? Is your ego so big you can’t handle a woman rejecting you?”
“Oh, you want me alright, my sexy little witch. Want me so bad it scares you. Well, I’ve got news for you. It scares the fuck out of me, too. But I don’t care. When the options are settling down with you for life and popping out little demonlings or watching you walk away, I know what I choose.”
For a moment, she couldn’t answer, could only gape at him as his words penetrated. Surely, she misunderstood. “What did you say?”
“I want you as my mate.”
No misunderstanding that time.
She tamped down her elation by slapping it with the cold, hard truth. “You’ll hurt me.”
“Trust me.”
He asked too much.
“I’m not the right woman.”
“You’re all I want.”
She shook her head lest his words weave a spell around her and make her believe. Yet despite all the warnings in her head, hope blossomed and love warmed her. How nice it would be to allow herself to love him. To trust him.
Sadness entered his expression at her rejection. “I know it’s hard for you, little witch, but I promise you’ve nothing to fear. Unless the thought of too many orgasms in a row freaks you out.”
And that quickly, he changed from pensive male to the one she’d grown to love with the mischievous smile. He lunged. She squealed like a little girl and ran. Not far though.
With his ridiculously long stride, he quickly caught her and tossed her over his shoulder.
He laughed as she beat at his broad back with her fists. “Save some of that energy for the bedroom because you are not leaving until you admit you care for me.”
“I’ll kill you first.”
“I like a girl who’s kinky.”
“You’re impossible.”
“No, but I am horny.”
“How are we supposed to catch those souls if we’re fooling around here?”
“Some things are more important.”
“How can having sex with me be more important than ensuring you don’t burst into flame tomorrow?”
“I would let someone beat me with a cat-o-nine too, if you’d just admit you like me.”
“I hate you.”
“Close. I see we’ll need to work on that.”

-Ysabel & Remy”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Tub full, she stood back to regard the mound of ice. Already the heat of her home fought to melt it. A rap came again at the entrance, more like an impatient pounding, and she cursed. The clock showed her only a few minutes away from her torture. I need whoever it is to go away.
She ran to the door and slid open the peek-a-boo slot.
Familiar turquoise eyes peered back. “Little witch, little witch, let me come in,” he chanted in a gruff voice.
A smile curled her lips. “Not by the wart on my chinny chin chin,” she replied. “And before you try huffing and puffing, Nefertiti herself spelled this door. So forget blowing it down.”
“So open it then. I’ve got a lead I think on escapee number three.”
A glance at the clock showed one minute left. “Um, I’m kind of in the middle of something. Can you come back in like half an hour?”
“Why not just let me in and I’ll wait while you do your thing? I promise not to watch, unless you like an audience.”
“I can’t. Please. Just go away. I promise I’ll let you in when you come back.”
His eyes narrowed. “Open this door, Ysabel.”
“No. Now go away. I’ll talk to you in half an hour.”
She slammed the slot shut and only allowed herself a moment to lean against the door which shuddered as he hit it with a fist. She didn’t have time to deal with his frustration. The tickle in her toes started and she ran to the bathroom, dropping her robe as she moved.
The fire erupted, and standing on the lava tile in her bathroom, she concentrated on breathing against the spiraling pain and flames. I mustn’t scream. Remy might still be there, listening.
Why that mattered, she couldn’t have said, but it did help her focus for a short moment. But the punishment would not allow her respite. Flames licked up her frame, demolishing her thin underpants and she couldn’t help but scream as the agony tore through her body.
Make it stop. Make it stop.
Wishing, praying, pleading didn’t stop the torture.
As the inferno consumed her, her ears roared with the snap of the fire and a glance in her mirror horrified her, for there she stood – a living pyre of fire. She closed her eyes against the brilliant heat, but that just seemed to amplify the pain.
Her knees buckled, but she didn’t fall. Something clasped her and she moaned as she sensed more than saw Remy’s arms wrap around her waist. It had to be him. Who else was crazy enough to break down her door and interrupt?
Forcing open her eyes, eyes that wanted to water but couldn’t as the heat dried up all moisture, she saw the flames, not picky about their choice
her own nightmare, she knew enough to try and push him away with hands that glowed inferno bright. He wouldn’t budge, and he didn’t scream – just held her as the curse ran its course. Without being told, once the flames disappeared, he placed her in the ice bath, the shocking cold a welcome relief.
Gasping from the pain, she couldn’t speak but remained aware of how he stroked her hair back from her face and how his arm rested around her shoulders, cradling her. “Oh, my poor little witch,” he murmured. “No wonder you’ve been hiding.”
Teeth chattering as the cold penetrated her feverish limbs, she tried to reply. “Wh-what c-c-can I say? I’m h-h-hot.”

-Remy & Ysabel”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Knocking on a massive carved door minutes later, the sigils on it shouting to those literate enough to ‘Stay away or else!’ he received a nice surprise when the door swung open.
Well, hello there. Reaching only his shoulder, with a wild mop of black hair, bright brown eyes and a rounded body made for worship – by his tongue – Remy wondered if he could convince the servant girl to come around the corner with him for a quickie before he met with this Ysabel person.
Then she opened her luscious mouth. “If you’re done gawking, you might want to step back before I smash your nose with the door when I shut it.”
Someone got up without sex today. He could fix that. “Hello beautiful, I actually have business with the occupant of this suite. I’m here to meet with Ysabel, the witch.”
“Really.” Her tone said what she thought of his claim and her brown gaze looked him up and down, then dismissed him. “I don’t think so.”
The door slammed shut in his face.
What. The. Fuck.
Remy pounded on the door. It immediately opened. The ebony haired vixen, her arms crossed under her bountiful tits, smirked. “Back already. What’s wrong? Did I hurt your feelings?”
“Listen woman, I don’t know what crawled up your ass and turned you into an uptight bitch, but I’m here to see Ysabel, so get the fuck out of my way before I put you over my knee and –”
“And what? Spank me?” Her eyes actually sparked with challenge, the minx. “I’d like to see you try. But, before you do, just so you know, my name is Ysabel. The witch.”
Aaaaah, shit. Never one to admit defeat, he let a slow simmering smile spread across his face. It worked on demonesses, damned souls, human women, and even gay men, but apparently, it had no effect on scowling witches. Too bad. “It’s your lucky day. Lucifer has informed me that you’re my next assignment.”
“Not by choice. And what are you supposed to do exactly? I need a tracker, not a gigolo. What happened? Did your gig as a pole dancer not work out? Equipment too small?” She dropped her gaze to his groin and sneered.
A sudden, irrational urge possessed him to drop his pants, flip her over and show her there was nothing wrong with the size of his cock. He abstained, but couldn’t prevent himself from taunting her, eyeing her up and down in the same dismissive manner. “Anytime you want to measure my dick, you let me know. Naked.”
“Pig.”
“No, demon. Really, get your terminology straight, would you? After Lucifer’s warning, I expected someone older and badder.”
To his credit he didn’t drop to the ground, but the pain in his balls did require he bend over to cup them gently which in turn meant he got the door in the face. Again.

-Ysabel & Remy”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Meet my cat, Felipe. I should probably mention, he doesn’t like strangers.   *   Understatement of the year. The gigantic, furry, striped monster with saber teeth and red glowing eyes was her cat? “Holy fuck, woman. He’s the size of a bloody car.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“I won’t have them looking at what’s mine. On second thought. Throw out all your underwear. I’ll lead the purge on the sewers myself so you can stroll around with your girl parts unencumbered for my enjoyment.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“What a woman. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d found himself so intrigued. But he wouldn’t get to enjoy the witch for long if she had her way. Remy revised his plan to find some mortal pussy before heading back to hell. For some reason, it suddenly became more important to make sure he stayed partnered with the witch. You are not getting rid of me that easy. Perhaps he’d inherited his mother’s crazy gene after all. She would be so proud.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Welcome to Hell, where the living conditions went beyond crowded, the job sucked, and the pay sucked even worse. It was like living in, well, Hell.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“You can call me Remy, but, when I get your thighs around my neck, feel free to call me God. It totally pisses Lucifer’s brother off, which means brownie points for me.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“So is there any reason we’re still on the mortal plane instead of back at your place fucking like wild animals?”
“Why wait? I didn’t come dressed like this for nothing. And I don’t see anyone around.” She tossed him a coy smile.
“Evil witch,” he growled.
“No, this is evil.” Pushing away from him, she turned and bent over with her hands braced on her thighs. She peered at him over her shoulder.
The smoldering look on his face made her heart race. “You naughty, naughty witch. What am I going to do with you?”
“Fuck me?”
“Definitely.”
“Make me cum?”
“Goes without saying.”
“Love me?”
“Forever and ever.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Enough!” Francisco shouted. “Either you get Lucifer to let me go or loverboy here gets it.”
Had the little bastard interrupted him and his witch as she publicly admitted she cared? Oh, hell no.
Remy jabbed his elbow back, twisted, then ducked as he grabbed Francisco’s dagger wielding hand. He twisted it up behind the damned soul’s back and shoved him to his knees.
“Sorry, my little witch. You were saying something about pleasure and alone time?”
Her lips twitched and mirth shone in her eyes. “I should have let him kill you.”
“But then who would love and worship you for an eternity?”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Release him or else.”
Remy groaned as he couldn’t help imagining the jests he’d have to put up with. What male allowed himself to get saved by his woman?
“What are you doing, Ysabel? I have this under control.”
“Really, because from here it looks like you’re all tied up.”
She strode into view with a cool smile, wearing an outfit that would look even better on the floor.
“Bah, as if something like rope could hold me.”
He yanked his arms apart and showed her his freed hands, a moment before a sharp point pressed against the back of his neck.
“Move and he dies!” Francisco yelled.
Cocking a hip, and crossing her arms, a smirk crossed his witch’s lips. “I don’t think so. That demon belongs to me, and I’d prefer him in one piece. So move the dagger away before I hurt you. Or don’t. But know this, if you even so much as scratch him, I’ll make sure your return to Hell is even more painful.”
“I knew you cared,” Remy exclaimed.
“Apparently, the insanity in your family is contagious,” she replied dryly. “Besides, you already forced me into admitting I loved you. As such, I realized I couldn’t exactly let Francisco kill you. That should be my pleasure alone.”
“You say the sweetest things,” Remy teased.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Yes, he was that good, or so his ego assumed. He didn’t often stop to ask.
-Remy's thoughts”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“First off, demon, let’s get one thing straight. I. Am. Not. Weak. What you saw last night was another fucking subclause of Lucifer’s that makes me of the same strength physically and magically as when I died, but only when on the mortal plane in the presence of the souls I damned. Any other time, I am not to be messed with.”
“If you’re so bad ass, how come I never heard of you?”
“I prefer to stay out of the spotlight, unlike some sorceress’s I know,” she said with a smile as she came to stop in front of him. “But I do have a nickname.”
“Hot on a stick?”
“No.”
“Spanks with magic?”
“Most definitely not.”
“I know, you must be the famous BJ Swallows.”
“I am going to hurt you.”
“I was right?”
“No. And your made up names are just pissing me off.”
“Made up? I’ll have you know those monikers are just a few of the more famous witch ones I know. Of course, I don’t know if their magical abilities extend beyond the pole they dance on, but still, they’re very well known in my circles.”
“Why am I not surprised?”
“Are you going to tell what your name is then? ‘Cause I’m gonna wager it isn’t Magical Pie.”
He really needed to learn how to keep certain thoughts to himself, an easy thing to promise with the iron grip she had on his balls. Not exactly how he pictured their first time touching. She twisted. He winced.
“Let this be a reminder not to fuck with me. And just so you know, while my nickname is the Blood Witch, my true title is Satan’s Assistant.”
She was the one who had all the damned souls trembling? Hot damn.
“I have heard of you.”
“Good, then you know what I can do. And might I add it hurts.”
She leaned up on tiptoe as she said it, her lips so close to his. But Ysabel wasn’t the only one with surprises. And truly, she’d pushed the boundaries of temptation too far. He snapped her magic binding and wrapped his arms around her, bringing her flush against his chest. “Did I mention, apart from ability with fire, I can unravel several forms of magic?”
Then he kissed her, and by all the coals in the furnace of Hell, he’d never burned hotter.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“So let me get this straight,” Ysabel asked. “You lost five prisoners, have no idea how or when, have no video footage due to some malfunction, and you can’t even make one chained up soul talk?”
“When you put it that way, it sounds bad.”
Ysabel stepped up to the warden and although she remained shorter than him by almost a foot, she seemed to grow somehow in presence. “What’s bad is if you let any more prisoners escape, the Devil won’t have to fire you because I’ll come down here myself, carve your body parts off one at a time and feed them to the hounds. Incompetence is unacceptable and I will not tolerate it.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Remy laughed as Crax reeled back from her, a dazed look on his face.
He was still chuckling as they exited the rusted gates.
“What is so damned funny?” she asked through gritted teeth.
“You. I mean, you couldn’t even hold your own against Pedro last night and yet you’re threatening the warden of Hell’s Prison. That takes balls.”
He received no warning, just a flick of her hand and he went flying, his impromptu airborne status halted by a crag of rock. And not a smooth one.

-Ysabel, Crax, & Remy”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Why are you smiling?” she asked.
“Thanks for the swim. I needed that. Nothing worse than a major hard on right before a mission.”
“Do you ever temper your tongue?” She forced herself not to peek lower than his chin.
“Nope. I just let it do what it wants, and might I say, it does wicked things.”
“You’re impossible.”
“No, totally possible, and unforgettable.”

-Ysabel & Remy”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Figures you’d be a fire demon.”
“It’s what makes me so hot.” He arched a brow and she snorted.
“Idiot.”

-Ysabel & Remy”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“I’d love to help you, but I’m understaffed.” His big, white toothed grin screamed, ‘I’m lying.’
“I’ve got a video of you doing the Macarena.”
He scowled. “I hate you. You’re just like another pesky daughter to me. Fine. Twist my arm. I’ll give you a tracker to use. But it will cost you.”
She arched a brow.
“Or not. Now get out.”

-Lucifer & Ysabel”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“Welcome to Hell where you’re screwed if you do and damned if don’t. And just so you know, Lucifer has a special spot reserved for you…”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch

“I am really starting to dislike you.” “You know what they say: dislike is akin to lust.” “That’s not the expression.” “It is in my world. You wouldn’t be the first one to tell me you hate me only to rip my clothes off and ride me like a wild cowgirl.”
― Eve Langlais, A Demon and His Witch