Learn Me Good Quotes

“Jack Woodson is currently living and working in Dallas, TX. He has forty children, and all of them have different mothers.”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good

“I choose to be well rounded. If I’m ever on Jeopardy! I’ll have a distinct advantage.”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good

“but midway through, “Why aren’t you wearing it?” I realized that I probably didn’t really want to be discussing supporting garments with an eight-year-old. Still, “Why was it in your desk?” did escape my lips. This was answered with the standard “I dunno,” and a serene look that suggested that nothing could be more normal than to keep underwear in your desk at school.”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good

“I don’t know about you, but I just don’t remember using much profanity in grade school. When we called each other names, they were childish nicknames of rear body parts and associated by-products. My parents told me one time that if I really wanted to call someone a name, I should do it intelligently and use big, sophisticated words. After all, I couldn’t get into trouble if the teacher didn’t even know what it meant. So at age 9, I started calling people “obsequious petards.” In layman’s terms, this translates roughly as “small farts.” I”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good

“The moral of the story, of course, is that if you cuss out an adult, you have to stay in during computer class and answer questions out of the science book. Just like with the “shout the fouk up” incident, I had Marvin write down what he had said and why. Here is Marvin’s scribbling: I said this helo assohle . I don’t know what I was thinking. It just poped out my moth. And really, don’t you hate it when things just pope out your moth?”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good

“However, mathematics-inspired books such as Agatha Christie’s Ten Little Indians (with its valuable, realworld lessons on subtraction) are fair game.”
― John Pearson, Learn Me Good