Audrey, Wait! Quotes

“It's funny how bed and pillows and covers can change a conversation. Words turn quiet and you mean more and say less. It's like you can build your own little world, Population: 2.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“You have to turn it up so that your chest shakes and the drums get in between your ribs like a heartbeat and the bass goes up your spine and fizzles your brain and all you can do is dance or spin in a circle or just scream along because you know that however this music makes you feel, it’s exactly right.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Did you just say ‘frolic’?”
“Is it not a word?”
“Who the hell says ‘frolic’?”
“I say frolic. And more people should.”
“They should say frolic or actually frolic.”
“Both.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Get over here and talk to her. She’s a reporter, not a Dementor.”
“Harry Potter nerd.”
“Whatever. Take the damn phone.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I told him that my cat was on fire and he didn’t even hear me! On fire, Victoria! And he didn’t care!”
“Aud, that is so fucking twisted that I don’t even know where to start.”
“Okay, I know, but it had to be drastic.”
“That’s not drastic, that’s sadistic. You’ve got your –tics mixed up.”
“Will you please focus on the issue at hand? Evan doesn’t listen to what I’m saying!”
“And this is news?”
“Should I break up with him?”
“Do you want to break up with him?”
“I don’t know. Distract me from feeling miserable.”
“Umm… ummm… I got new shoes.”
“Woo.”
“Wanna come over and try them on?”
“I’ll be there in ten minutes.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“If our school ever performed a play about the French Revolution, she could play the guillotine.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Hey, it’s-!”
“Who? Oh. Oh.”
“Shut up.”
“I haven’t said anything yet!”
“Don’t.”
“How can I shut up if I haven’t said anything?”
“I know you. You’ve got a monologue coming up.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“That would make a fantastic college entrance essay. ‘I Killed My Boyfriend and Still Managed to Maintain a 4.2 GPA and the Lead in the Spring Musical.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“So do I kill myself now, or do I wait and do it in front of Evan so he feels really, really, really bad?”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“How would you like to star in your very own commercial?"
"I'd rather swim in battery acid.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Hello. Audrey’s phone. She’s currently suiting up for a soul-deadening hourly job that provides no benefits, how may I help you?”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“WHY ARE YOU NOT ANSWERING YOUR PHONE?!? OH MY GOD, DID YOU SEE THE ARTICLE? I AM FREAKING OUT, WHY ARE YOU NOT ANSWERING YOUR PHONE?!? Please call me, I’m starting to act like Tizzy around here. It’s getting ugly. Oh, hi, Mr. and Mrs. Cuttler, in case you get this first. Everything’s fine, I’m just trying to get ahold of Audrey. Okay, bye. AUDREY, CALL ME BEFORE I HAVE TO RESORT TO SKYWRITING”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“What about James?”
“James? James, the guy I work with? James who takes ice cream scooping more seriously than anyone should? James who almost had a nervous breakdown when the chocolate and rainbow sprinkles accidentally got mixed together? That James?”
“He has a good work ethic. And he’s cute.”
“Hello, I’m not thirty. I don’t want a good work ethic yet. I just want someone who can form complete sentences.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I’m a ball of rage right now, James. Sitting isn’t gonna do much.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I liked James and James liked me and we both knew it and if you think about it, that's like a miracle. A real miracle. Everyone says that babies are miracles, and don't get me wrong, I love cute little pudgy babies, but if you think about it, me having a baby right now would not be a miracle. At all. But finding someone that gets me? That's the real work. That's where the miracles are.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“If you really want to know something about me, you should know this: I like my music loud.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“-"Great! Fucking! News! What would be the best thing that could ever happen?”
-“If after I died, I was reincarnated as Meg White?”
-“Okay, the second-best thing.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I mean, i was into their music and everything way before I knew what they looked like, but they had their pictures in the CD insert and when Victoria and I got it, we were both like, "Why, hellooooo there." Plus, they were British. I'm a sucker for cute boys with guitars, as you may have noticed, but throw in a London accent and I'll happily sell my soul without a second thought.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“If you really want to know something about me, you should know this: I like my music loud. I mean loud. I'm not talking about the kind of loud where your parents knock on your bedroom door and ask you to turn it down. Please. That's amateur hour. When I say loud, I mean you-can't-hear-your-parents-knocking-and-the-neighbors-are-putting-a-FOR-SALE-sign-on-their-house-and-moving-to-another-block-because-they-can't-handle-the-constant-noise-anymore loud. You have to turn it up so that your chest shakes and the drums get in between your ribs like a heartbeat and the bass goes up your spine and frizzles your brain and all you can do is dance or spin in a circle or just scream along because you know that however this music makes you feel, it's exactly right. If you are not this kind of person, then I don't think we'll be great friends.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Put some muscle into it! Channel your inner Trent Reznor!”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Oh my God," I gasped. "They think I'm like those girls! They think I run around and crash my car and forget to wear underwear.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I know, but I hate him for kissing you.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Fuck your royalties and die.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“Oh God, I heart him so much.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I know this is like the longest story ever, but I really just wanted you to know the other side. (And besides, Bendomolena’s been on my lap this whole time and once Bendomolena decides to sit on you,get comfortable, because you’re not going anywhere for awhile.) Anyway, James is coming over in fifteen minutes so we can go with Victoria and Jonah to see New Nostalgia, and I still have to figure out what I’m wearing.
Like the Beatles said, “O-bla-di, o-bla-da, life goes on.”
And it does.
Rock on.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I nodded. "I've been there. I obsess over mixes all the time. If there's one bad song on there, it kills the whole thing.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!

“I know this is like the longest story ever, but I really just wanted you to know the other side. (And besides, Bendomolena’s been on my lap this whole time and once Bendomolena decides to sit on you, get comfortable, because you’re not going anywhere for awhile.) Anyway, James is coming over in fifteen minutes so we can go with Victoria and Jonah to see New Nostalgia, and I still have to figure out what I’m wearing. Like the Beatles said, “O-bla-di, o-bla-da, life goes on.”
And it does.
Rock on.”
― Robin Benway, Audrey, Wait!