Real Mermaids Don’t Wear Toe Rings Quotes

“Hey Jade?' He called out holding two packages of maxi pads.
I shook my head violently to stop Dad from talking, but from where he stood, I doubted he could see I was talking to a boy. A mildly annoying, but nonetheless cute boy.
'Do you want wings or no wings?'
It was official.
This was shaping up to be the Most. Embarrassing. Day. Ever.”
― Helene Boudreau, Real Mermaids Don’t Wear Toe Rings

“I was in no mood to negotiate with the Tampon Terrorist.”
― Helene Boudreau, Real Mermaids Don’t Wear Toe Rings

“Jade’s 5 - minute Chocolate Mug Cake — When Wigwags are in short supply, this is the quickest way I’ve found to chocolate bliss. First, get yourself the biggest microwaveable mug in the cupboard. In it put: - 4 tablespoons flour - 4 tablespoons sugar - 2 tablespoons cocoa Mix it well. Then add: - 1 egg Mix. Then add: - 3 tablespoons milk - 3 tablespoons oil Mix. Then add: - 3 tablespoons chocolate chips (NOT optional—at least as far as I’m concerned) - 1 capful of vanilla extract And…wait for it…MIX! Cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts (high). The cake will look like it’s going to overflow but don’t freak out! Let it cool for a bit (unless you want to burn your lips off) then ENJOY! NOTES & TIPS: Some say this can serve 2 but, yeah right; whatever. TAKE OUT THE SPOON before you microwave the mug. Don’t ask me why I know this…”
― Helene Boudreau, Real Mermaids Don’t Wear Toe Rings