David’s Reviews > Mr Blank > Status Update
David
is on page 3 of 300
Now when I say "Satanist" most people picture someone like Ming the Merciless drinking red wine out of a virgin's skull. This guy looked like an entertainment lawyer, which if you ask me is about a hundred times worse.
— Mar 05, 2015 08:36PM
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David’s Previous Updates
David
is on page 252 of 300
That would have to go down in the annals of bad goodbyes: let's bring up her adorable dead pet. I could top that off by punching her in the stomach and keying her car.
— Mar 07, 2015 05:45PM
David
is on page 199 of 300
(The Trojan War)
The lesson is this: when a group of women asks who the prettiest one is, run. Don't look back. Just run.
— Mar 07, 2015 03:52PM
The lesson is this: when a group of women asks who the prettiest one is, run. Don't look back. Just run.
David
is on page 188 of 300
"You drink coffee, right?"
"It's practically a job requirement."
— Mar 07, 2015 03:34PM
"It's practically a job requirement."
David
is on page 153 of 300
The desk sergeant gave me an annoyed look, so I flashed my badge.
"Detective Saroyan," I said.
"What can I do for you, detective?" He needed a couple thousand more cups of coffee.
— Mar 07, 2015 09:04AM
"Detective Saroyan," I said.
"What can I do for you, detective?" He needed a couple thousand more cups of coffee.
David
is on page 118 of 300
"I need to get changed."
"I don't know, I think that look kind of works for you. Sort of modern frump."
The look she gave me could have stripped paint off a car.
— Mar 06, 2015 01:18PM
"I don't know, I think that look kind of works for you. Sort of modern frump."
The look she gave me could have stripped paint off a car.
David
is on page 72 of 300
Who owns a gun, gets activated for an assassination attempt, then thinks to himself, "Ah, the gun's so boring. You know what, I think I'm gonna go with the rock on the chain."
— Mar 05, 2015 10:27PM
