P. Kirby’s Reviews > Pestilence > Status Update

"Pray for the world, dear Sara. War is coming."

*Snort.* He's "coming." So many sex jokes, so little time.

"If you are no longer Pestilence the Conqueror, then what you like me to call you?" I ask...

Todd. He's totally a Todd.

That electricity would begin to work as it ought, that batteries would hold a charge and perhaps even the Internet would eventually come back.

If electricity works, at least some of the time, batteries would work. If you're gonna break science; explain why it's broken and how. Lazy writing.

"What will you do when all the people are gone?"

Yeah. What will he do after he's killed everybody? What's the point of the other horsemen if he can wipe everyone out?

He's [Death] quite handsome, I realize. Just like his brother.

Well, of course he is. Three more horsemen; three more Biblical fanfic wankfests.

These violent delights have violent ends...

NO! No, no, no! This shitty book and its asinine heroine do not have the right to quote that line. In a brilliant, nuance examination of moral ambiguity like the TV series, Westworld, it's perfect. But...no...not in this hot mess.

Someone planted a bomb.

Finally! Aside from American being the land of gun idolatry, we're probably gonna be ingenious with grenades and bombs.

Pestilence came here with a grisly task, and he armored himself against the atrocity of it by convincing himself that humans were monsters. And we proved him right every time we attacked him.

Because we should just be all, "Please kill us"? I was wrong earlier. This. This is peak stupid in the novel.

I lead Trixie through the door after me, careful not to jostle Pestilence's slumped body in the process.

Author knows fuck all about horses and didn't bother to research. Or have someone in the know edit this thing. A large horse with a man slumped over him won't fit through a standard doorway,

When will the media figure out that the horseman cannot be killed? When will people stop sacrificing their lives to end an immortal thing?

Ah, honey, we've found your super power. It's the ability to kill irony.