Status Updates From Beard Necessities (Winston ...

So...I'm not ready for this to end so I'm leaving the epilogue for another day. I'm probably gonna get something short off the tbr in the meantime, then I'm gonna come back to finish this and since I'm still to into this to get into some other book that takes commitment, I expect I'll reread bits and pieces of the Winston series.

The sweet boy who’d brought me hot chocolate and cinnamon rolls,who’d changed my bandages and snuck me into his house so I wouldn’t sleep in the cold.He’d been the first person to ask about my hopes and dreams,to make me believe in possibility.And he’d been the only person I trusted to hold me,keeping watch and the monsters at bay.
My love. The strongest and best man I’d ever known. What had life done to him?

I watched as he rebuilt the wall between us.I watched it as my stomach sunk.Brick by brick.Until it was him in his fortress and me left standing outside.
[...]
I hated it when he looked at me this way,like he thought he knew everything going on in my head and just assumed whatever action would hurt him most would be the course of action I’d take.Even more,I hated that—until recently—he had been mostly right

She’d opened a window. Come hell or high water or famine or the end of days, I was climbing through that damn window. But I was moving slow. I wasn’t giving her any reason to shut it, not ever again. I swore to God, I was going to be a fucking saint.

This man is desperate for her and I mean DESPERATE

“You’ll always want me,until you don’t. You want to talk,but only about subjects that you want to talk about. You’re in love with whatever you can’t have,but as soon as—"
Without thinking, I advanced on her.
“Honey” I rough-whispered so I wouldn’t shout,“if I thought you would ever actually give yourself to me, if I could have you, really and truly have you, I’d take you. Right now. Right here”
🥵

“Ben took care of me,kept me safe.I owed him a debt I could never repay.But I was never honest with him about how I felt, what I wanted, or who I was. And when I tried to be honest, I just hurt him. He didn’t want honesty, he wanted me to love him, and I couldn’t”
He emotionally manipulated you, lied about being the one who kept you safe so you'd feel obliged to him and full of guilt about loving someone else!

Her:That’s where we’d been for ten years.I didn’t know if that’s where we were now. I didn’t want to be standing at two opposing sides of the battlefield. But Lord help me, even if we were, I still loved my enemy
Him:Scarlet had no idea what she did to me. She’d never sought to hurt me on purpose. But in the end, it didn’t matter.
In the end, it hurt badly, and I couldn’t handle any more hurt right now

“Cletus—”
“I solemnly promise, the very moment I arrive, I shall divulge the unabridged version of events. Hell, I’ll even tell you all the stuff Billy should’ve told you years ago but didn’t ’cause he was too busy vying for the world championship title of Most Honorable Martyr—which he’s earned in perpetuity, forever and ever, amen. I realize that’s a disappointment since you were also hoping for the title.”

1.Bittersweet that this is the final book
2.Thank God for Cletus She loved Billy before Ben, she loved Billy when Ben died, she loves Billy now
3.I couldn’t think I could get more pissed but Ben keeps proving me wrong from the grave, that piece of shit knew Billy almost died to protect Claire but he told everyone (Claire included) he was the reason she was safe. I need to break something.