Status Updates From If I Was Your Girl

(Spoiler) I was really hoping this was going to be a story about a trans person who didn’t get outed against her will or get beaten up, especially since the summary emphasizes how this is a “big-hearted” “love story.”

I can’t believe Bee would do this. I was going to say it seemed out of character, but actually she wasn’t really developed enough for me to know that yet. She’s just more developed than Amanda’s other female friends.

"I was with my girlfriends, shopping for a dress for an actual dance with my actual boyfriend." This is when I file yet another imaginary petition to get straight girls to stop using "girlfriend" platonically. You'd think a book with trans and lesbian characters wouldn't do this, but here we are.

The whole "we found our way" cornfield/life metaphor is a bit heavy-handed.

All these girls she hangs out with blur together in my mind. If there's one section of the book that's underdeveloped so far, I think it's the sense of the passage of time and the development of Amanda's female friendships.

"I took a minute to actually read the bumper stickers... JESUS WAS A CONSERVATIVE, one read, and RIGHTS COME FROM GOD NOT GOVERNMENT; ILLEGAL ALIENS! EXACTLY WHICH PART DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND? and I CAN’T HELP THAT I’M HOMOPHOBIC … I WAS BORN THAT WAY! I stood in place and swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry. The side door slid open and Anna leaned out, smiling." RUN AWAY. RUN FAR AWAY

(Mild spoiler) "'I know when we kissed I felt warm all over, like when you sit too close to a campfire, and I know no girl’s made me feel that way before.' 'That’s really nice,' I said." This is inexplicably funny to me and I don't think the author meant it to be.

So Grant keeps saying "ain't" but I've never heard anyone my age use that word unironically and I'm from the South... Maybe I just don't live in a rural enough area??

You know how everything is going so well in a book, and there's that naggign thought in your head - HERE COMES THE TWIST. HERE COME THE TEARS!

this is the moment and I am not ready.

"I was never going to be free of my past; it was always going to be there, waiting to suck me in and crush me like a black hole."

"I desperately wanted to finish the sentence with the truth, but what was there to say? I think I like you, but I'll never have a normal life. I think you like me, but you'll never understand who I am."

"Son," he said, "I want you to have a good life. Boys who really think the things in your story are confused. They don't have good lives. So you're not one of those boys." Ouch

I loved everything about this book. Though I'm not transgendered, I do understand the fear of being different and the struggle to keep a secret that could be fatal if the wrong people knew the truth.

"Mind if I sit here?" "Yes. I'm fine, I mean." "My friend Parker thinks so."
Haha, smooth.

"I brought my wrist up to my chest and looked down. The identification bracelet said my name was Andrew Hardy. If I died, I realized, Andrew was the name they would put on my tombstone."

"I imagined how I must look to him, and my mind leaped to fill in all the worst things I had ever felt about myself."

I've always wanted to read this book and I just can't put it down. The story is so interesting. You can imagine the whole thing

since I’m having a hard time continuing Voyager, I’d read this instead.

I’m so sorry, Amanda... whoever said this book wasn’t realistic, was too fucking happy, didn’t actually read it

Fuck Bee

Girls supporting and trusting girls

I’m loving the friendship with Bee right now!!! ❤️

This is going a lot faster than I thought, but also making me think a lot.

This is going faster than I thought, but also making me think a lot

Ohmygosh. Ohmygosh Ohmygosh this is so good.

I literally can’t stop reading this book!! Hooked from the first page! I really need to go to sleep but I can’t haven’t lost sleep over a book in a while, but this is definitely breaking that chain.

I got the audiobook issue fixed and I'm inhaling this one again!

I’m hoping this has a happy ending. Amanda deserves it

I hope this doesn't crush me.

Glad I gave this another try