Status Updates From Bigfoot Pirates Haunt My Balls

aaaahhhhhhh asdfghjkl; i’m so intrigued and actually don’t hate the writing in these. what even-
love is real

If you know me you don’t see this….. it’s for a challenge..

This one actually has a pretty interesting plot. 🤔

God forgive me for reading this I'm just one curious cat

"What do you want from me?” I ask him. “I need you to stop haunting my balls. I mean, you seem like a nice guy but it really hurts.”“Aye, the cold grip of death is a bastard!” Agrees Lorko. “It was not my intent to make ‘yer balls ache like two oysters in the deep"

"Just give it to me straight, doc. How sick am I?" Dr. Toro shakes his head. "Well, you're not sick, actually." He explains. I stare at him blankly. "I'm not?" A smile of relief slowly begins to creep across my face. "But don't get too excited." Dr. Torp tells me. "You're still in a world of trouble. I'm afraid your balls are haunted."