Beth

“I didn’t cry. And if you think I did, good luck proving it, asshole.”
― David Wong, John Dies at the End

“Here's where things get hazy. John claims that the men hauling him away from the scene were escorted by other men carrying submachine guns, though when pressed, he admitted that they may have been flashlights. Either way, John says the men threw him down and intended to execute him, at which point he kicked one of the men in the face and backflipped to his feet. He then wrestled away the man's gun and "dick-whipped" him with it. I am unclear as to whether or not this means he struck the man in the groin or merely slapped him in the same manner in which he would slap a person with his dick. I never ask John to clarify such things. Anyway, he said he swung again and slammed another man's skull with the gun, so hard it "made the batteries fly out.”
― David Wong, John Dies at the End

“I was going back and reading Marconi’s last book again, and there’s this part that
always gets me. He points out that the amount of the universe a human can experience is
statistically, like, zero percent. You’ve got this huge universe, trillions of trillions of miles of empty
space between galaxies, and all a human can perceive is a little tunnel a few feet wide and a few feet
long in front of our eyes. So he says we don’t really live in the universe at all, we live inside our
brains. All we can see is like a blurry little pinhole in a blindfold, and the rest is filled in by our
imagination. So whatever we think of the world, whether you think the world is cruel or good or
cold or hot or wet or dry or big or small, that comes entirely from inside your head and nowhere
else.”
― David Wong, This Book Is Full of Spiders

“Damn. Bob was kind of awesome.”
― Jim Butcher, Skin Game