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A.A. Milne
“Did I miss?" you asked.

"You didn't exactly miss," said Pooh, "But you missed the balloon."

"I'm so sorry," you said, and you fired again, and this time you hit the balloon and the air came slowly out, and Winnie-the-Pooh floated down to the ground.”
A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

C.S. Lewis
“I do love that tune - but really, I must go home. I only meant to stay for a few minutes.”
C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe

Matthew Gregory Lewis
“A bad composition carries its own punishment—contempt and ridicule; a good one excites envy and entails upon its author a thousand mortifications; he finds himself assailed by partial and ill-humored criticism; one man finds fault with the plan, another with the style, a third with the precept which strives to inculcate; and they who cannot succeed in finding fault with the book, employ themselves in stigmatizing its author: they maliciously rake out from obscurity every little circumstance which may throw ridicule upon his private character or conduct and aim at wounding the man since they cannot hurt the writer.”
Matthew Gregory Lewis, The Monk

Donna Tartt
“It is a terrible thing to learn as a child that one is a being separate from all the world, that no one and no thing hurts along with one's burned tongues and skinned knees, that one's aches and pains are all one's own. Even more terrible, as we grow older, to learn that no person, no matter how beloved, can ever truly understand us. Our own selves make us most unhappy, and that's why we're so anxious to lose them...”
Donna Tartt, The Secret History

“I growl with frustration at my reflection in the mirror. My hair is fifty shades messed up. Why is it so kinky and out of control? I need to stop sleeping with it wet. As I brush my long brown hair, the girl in the mirror with the brown eyes too big for her head stares back at me. Wait... my eyes are blue! It dawns on me that I've been staring at a poster of Kristen Stewart for five minutes. My own hair is fine.”
Fanny Merkin, Fifty Shames of Earl Grey
tags: humor

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