Kami Bourb

“I’m afraid for him because every day he has to fight the person he is, to be the person he wants to be.”
― B.B. Reid, Fear Me

“The Grand Canyon was carved by a river. It sliced through the rock, revealing layer upon layer of beauty. Beauty that couldn’t be seen until the earth was cut open. One little sliver of water…” “Evan…” “One little sliver.” He traced the ragged seam down to my chin. “The majesty of the Canyon is that depth. All that beauty lay buried for years until the river cut it open. Then all was revealed.”
― Emma Scott, How to Save a Life

“I Never Told You
You can fill a book with everything I never said
Or the lines of a poem
Or an Empty pool
Or an empty bedroom, the candles all blown out
I never told you how the reflection of myself in your eyes
Was the only mirror I could bear to look at
Or how I fought every day
To transfuse the girl I saw there with the girl I am
I tried to breathe in the words you made me:
beautiful
good
brave
I tried to be them for you even though they were weighted with impossibility
I never told you
how I always feared the rough edges of myself were too sharp for you
and how I fought everyday to blunt them
To bring down the walls
To let you in
without cutting you because I could never bear to hurt you like the others did
Every day
a fierce pride roared in me
I was so lucky to know the truth
I was the beneficiary of your radiance
I basked in it and felt special
And if not for the pain of your solitude
I would have been content to be the only one
I never told you
How your touch made me feel like laughing and crying and singing all at once
How your hand passing over my skin where atrocities
Had not yet sloughed off,
Skin cells remembering the worst touches
Was like a tide washing over the ruddy sand
And leaving it whole and smooth
You made my skin forget
Gave me new memories
New sensations that didn't drag the shadows from the past
In your arms I could start again,
Start over.
There is no greater gift in all the world
Than you
to the wreckage
that is me...
I never told you
How I longed to kiss away your every bruise
until there was no evidence
No ghosts of your own suffering
To put your pieces back together
Seal the cracks
Vanish them like they never were
And never, ever
Leave a scar
I never told you
I would take your pain if I could
I would drink it down
And take my comfort
In making you ache a little less
For a little while
Did I?
I'll never know because I never told you that I loved you
I love you
I love you
It's too lat to say it now
The time has passed for words
How pathetic and small and weak
On the phone
Or on a piece of paper
Starving
Without the force of my own vitality
My voice
My breath
My blood singing n my veins for you
To give them power
They are lost
I love you
It's too late but I love you
And I'm sorry
I never told you.”
― Emma Scott, How to Save a Life

“Comment number one - how much do you weigh to snap the bridge like that? I thought you Asians were supposed to be petite and dainty.”
― Julie Kagawa, The Eternity Cure