This is not The Haters Club You're Looking For discussion

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End of Year Hatred

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message 1: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) Sometimes there is so much hatred I don't have time to give it all my proper attention. In the interest of putting to rest the year behind us, here then are my top three hates of 2008:

1) Comcast

You sleezy, inept, fuckwitted bastards. If you don't stop double charging me every month for your half-assed entertainoproducts I'm going to come down to your local office and behead your mind wiped employees with a broad sword, and then fill their body cavities with excrement. The fact that I have called your corporate labyrinth no less than TWELVE TIMES this year to resolve this fuckitude puts you in the retardo hall of fame. Thanks for reaffirming my belief in corporate stupidity. I hate you more than Steve Mort hates speaking slowly. Die please. Kthnxbi.

2) My "boss"

There is no such thing as emergency advertising. By it's very nature, advertising is something you can plan for, schedule, and therefor be able to block out design time in the calendar of a FREELANCE graphic designer. I am not responsible for your complete inability to read a calendar, communicate deadlines, or keep track of the passage of time. Anyone who is less organized than me likely has difficulty feeding themselves and would be placed on an ice floe by the Inuit. I hate you the way I hate underwear creep, underwires that pierce my bra lining, and tags in my shirts. Please go back to England where your ineptitude will be less noticeable.

3) My ex husband

Everytime I think about the fact that I had sex with you earlier in my life I want to shove a chop stick up my nose and stir, just to eradicate the memory. You give a new name to idiocy. You aspire to halfwittedness. My only wish is that I had taken photos of you dressed up in your Victoria's Secret black stockings, garter belt and silk chamise, so that I could take out full page ads in the New York Times, where your parent's society friends could bask in the glory of your complete freakishness. You demented ponce. Keep your crazy off our daughter or I will call my friend the ex-mercenary and he will come and collect your head and ship it to a soccer field in Chad for their next game of stick ball. I hate you so much that I have to stop myself from punching you in the face repeatedly every time I lay eyes on you. I worn my back molars down from grinding my teeth in order to not smother you while you sleep. Die, you skanky bastard, die. Preferably at the hands of a street thug in some back alley.


The Crimson Fucker (tcf123) | -3 comments Holy fuck… now I’m afraid of not finding the card in my mail box!!! What if is not there and I send you my angry note but you send me one that’s angrier than mine!!! Damn that was hot!! I loved the first one… for some reason the idea of running inside a cubicle labyrinth like an Amazon wielding a bloody sword unleashing mayhem everywhere you go makes me happy =)


message 3: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) Oh Alfonso... I can't believe your card hasn't gotten there yet!!! You have to let me know if it isn't there soon! If it doesn't show up today I'm totally sending you another card!!!


message 4: by Tom (new)

Tom Foolery (tomfoolery) Re Comcast: The Consumerist has some executive email addresses for Comcast, as well as suggestions on how to write a good Executive Email Carpet Bomb. Also links to ComcastMustDie.com.



message 5: by Félix (last edited Dec 29, 2008 01:38PM) (new)

Félix (habitseven) Charissa you are a poet. I really hate how well you define and focus your lovely hate. I hate the living shit out of it. Kthnxbi.


message 6: by Nikki (new)

Nikki Boisture Anyone who has Comcast certainly understands your pain, Charissa. I can't think of how many good hours I have wasted of my life talking to those incompetent drones at Comcast. You know, the answer to EVERY question is not "I'll send a new signal to your box!"

If my condo wasn't facing the wrong way, I would have had a dish by now......grrrr.....


message 7: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) My "box" doesn't need a new signal. It does just fine with the signals it has. What I need them to send me is some of my hard earned cash back!!!

Oh I have so much more hatred. I keep it at home in a box usually. I need it to feed on in order to drive the freeways in my area.


message 8: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) I thought you might be the one person who would truly understand that.


message 9: by Meels (new)

Meels (amelia) Oh, believe me, I understand the chopstick thing...not just for the ex-husband though.

I don't have Comcast, thankfully, because if I did I may be tipped over the edge today and forced to commit some atrocity worthy of international news!

I'll tell you what I hate, last minute people. What the hell is your problem? Did you not realize in the last 365 days that you might want to make that IRA contribution, contribute for the year to your kid/grandkid's 529 plan? Oh, I don't know, you only had the last 3 months notice that you wanted to dispose of that worthless security to take the tax loss. And, your Required Minimum Distributions have been on the system for the last six months at least! THEN you freak out on ME that it isn't done yet? What the hell, you'd think that you'd at least figure that if you took it before Christmas it would not only satisfy your RMD, but give you that bit of extra spending cash for the holidays! But, NO, rich bastards...If I had 5 grand coming my way, you better believe I wouldn't forget about it until the last possible moment! The fact that if you don't do it the tax man is going to take HALF would be a little incentive! Never mind that you have nothing else to do but sit around thinking up things that I can do and/or figure out for you that amount to NOTHING and don't actually pay ME anything!!! I hate you!

While I'm at it, I hate that fucking iTunes won't download my podcasts today for some inexplicable reason. I've been told the site might just be too busy with all of the kids trying to spend their iTunes gift cards. WTF, little ankle biters, get back to school already and free up my interwebs!

Lastly, I hate PMS and the fact that I am sitting here instead of home taking a nap with Larry and my kitty.


message 10: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) high five me baby. that's some sweet hatred.


message 11: by Meels (new)

Meels (amelia) Thanks for letting me vent, babe!


message 12: by Charissa (new)

Charissa (dakinigrl) oh hell yeah. sounds like you got plenty to bitch about. Ah tax season. Wheee!!!

::::smishes you::::::

Happy New Year Honey!!


message 13: by [deleted user] (new)

Amy! I'm sorry that our beer night plans never came to reality...believe me when I say I want to hang out, soon?


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