What's the Name of That Book??? discussion
Query abandoned by poster
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ABANDONED. Narrator looking back on a childhood where parents murdered whole family except her
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The parents both died as part of a suicide pact. All other kids 'successfully' killed. Just the narrator for whom no attempt was taken on her life.
Do you remember anything else about the book? Where was it set? And when was it set (1950's, 60's etc.)

The book wasn't 'about' the murders as such, much more about the repercussions in her life, particularly the idea that she wasn't chosen to be saved, rather she was simply forgotten about in the moment. That and the fact that her father was sane and adored his kids, but ultimately loved the mother more.

https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
I think (I could be wrong) it flips back and forth in time, revealing that her mother, suffering from post-partum depression (manifesting itself as paranoia, psychosis, rather than typical depression) decides its best for everyone is the family is murdered. The Dad loves his children, but more than anything he loves his wife and will do anything for her, and so complies in the murders. The narrator happened to be out (I think playing) at the time, didn't get murdered and feels residual pain that maybe she wasn't forgotten because she was merely forgotten.
Yes, very weird! -- and not an easy one to google. Any help much appreciated :)