Science Fiction Microstory Contest discussion
DECEMBER 2023 SCIENCE FICTION MICROSTORY CONTEST (Comments only)
date
newest »
newest »
message 1:
by
J.F.
(new)
Nov 26, 2023 11:50AM
Theme: "The Dark Side of the Moon", either literally, or metaphorically, as in the side we never see of something.
reply
|
flag
Just a taste..The team of engineers monitored the output from the microreactor. When it reached 2.85 terawatts, they simply said “Go!” into the coms.
The last rays of sunshine dropped below the horizon, and, in an instant, the crater was cast in darkness. Another technician flipped some switches, illuminating the stage and activating the antigravity isolation system. The stage floated two meters off the surface of the moon. He gave his “Go!”
A newbie involuntarily searched for the “blue marble,” before reminding himself that Earth would never be visible from this side of the moon.
The basics out of the way, the main engineering team, headed by the sound engineer switched on the transducers. The VU meters bounced once and the sound man grinned as he felt the microquakes beneath his feet. He nodded to the bass player who strummed the cords of “Speak to me” that first were released on The Album exactly 100 years ago.
Seismographs picked up the vibrations on the Earth side and blue-violet lasers lanced out into the night and illuminated dust around the asteroid belt. Geometric shapes pulsed in time to the note as he bent and shaped.
“Roger Waters would be proud,” thought the sound man as he listened to the opening notes of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon being played on the Dark Side of the Moon…
Justin wrote: "Great story Tom!!"Thank you kindly, Justin!
I posted critiques of the first two stories, trying out a protocol where I summarize the story so the writer can know whether I really understood it followed by what I like most about it, then my suggestions for making it stronger. I suggest others might want to try that to sort of formalize critiquing and provide good feedback.
Thank you very much for making the effort to promote and refine the review process, J.F.
Thanks J.F. and Tom for your critiques. Both very much on point, especially if I expand the story later on. Just happy I managed to finish something this month!
Thanks for the critiques, Tom! I learned much about my story and Jeremy's as well. And you definitely followed my proposed format exactly as intended. I hope others follow. And more stories, too!
Jeremy, I've been thinking that your story could be expanded to a "frame" story where the individual heads each tell a remarkable story from their human past and they all tie together in some subtle and satisfying way for the person listening to them.
It wasn't the story I was trying to write, but it certainly could. It's a great idea.The frame is a bit somber. The individual stories would need to have contrasting moods, I think, to maintain interest. I think if I wrote it, it might come out uneven.
Maybe if there was a hidden connection between the heads, and the story slowly reveals it...Got to think about it some more. Thanks J.F.
Recovered from a cold, got my brain working and got my story in. A fun one to write, hopefully enjoyable to read.
Greg wrote: "Recovered from a cold, got my brain working and got my story in. A fun one to write, hopefully enjoyable to read."Enjoyable.
These are all excellent stories. Will try to write reviews this weekend.
Greg! What a great story! I loved it, and it really played vividly in my mind. I thoroughly enjoyed it!
Really like your critiquing protocol, J.F.! This way, the writer can know to what extent a critiquer has understood the story, and in what ways. Good stories this month, everyone.
And wishing a wonderful Christmastime to those here who celebrate--and indeed to everyone!
Whew! Last story of 2023! I don't know if my muse is just on a long sabbatical or what, but I'm finding it harder to write these compared to a few years ago. Maybe that's just a distortion in my brain that thinks so.Anyway, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all! I enjoy reading your submissions every month and seeing how different we all are in our approach to a prompt.
Best wishes to you all for 2024!
Mod
Happy Holidays all, and best wishes in the new year!
Thank you for the reviews Tom and JF, I really appreciate it!I was struggling with how to really connect to this month's theme. As you pointed out, I spent a lot of time on detail and then shortchanged the plot and resolution.
Your recommendation to have Captain Rolo forced into a black and white decision about what to do with the refugee children would definitely helped align the story with this month's theme.
Thank you both!
Got my critiques/comments up. Since the other critiques covers the weaknesses/strengths, I went for possible writing prompts to expand the stories.Let me know if they are useful or merely annoying...
Oh, and thanks for the critiques. I completely left out the Martian Astrodome, which was a lyric in a song that was an inspiration for this story.
Greg wrote: "Let me know if they are useful or merely annoying..."Greg, all feedback is useful if it gives the author some idea of how the reader experienced the work so your comments meet that goal.
