SOLVED. Sci-fi from the 2000s, takes place in an alternate universe after the sacking of Rome. Everyone in the story has elemental powers except for the main character. Spoilers.

[Kris]

Haley, sounds like this book is for adults, not teens?

The main character is like a military general/admiral, not a soldier or politician?

[Haley]

Haley wrote: "His mom or aunt (I can't remember who raised him) stifled his powers with her own (water I think). He ended up being pretty important in the military or something like that."

Yes it's an adult series and he was a general. I actually figured out that it was the Codex Alera series

[Bargle]

Link for 1st book in series. Furies of Calderon by Jim Butcher.