Wizard Swears and Other Questionable Language

[Rob]

How often are you all so deep into a series of books (or tv show for that matter), that when in a moment of frustration (or other anger), you utter either aloud or in your head, a truly terrible swear from a series?

Thought it might be fun to list some of our favorite fantasy/sci-fi swears.

For example, my wife is not a curser, but she will say "frell" to this very day and she barely even watched Farscape as much as I did.

Here's an oldie but a goodie to start us off:

Harry Potter Puppet Pals - Wizard Swears

As much as I now loathe the Sword of Truth series, I did enjoy Zed's use of the word "bags!" and how everyone would react to his foul mouth.

[Niki Hawkes, I made it past GOTM... barely]

Ha! Bags would've been my first one.

[Rob]

During the Stormlight archive reread/oathbringer release, I was definitely muttering "stormfather!" on occasion, blasphemer that I am.

Now its Malazan time, so now its "hood's" whatever.

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

Dresden has "Stars and Stones," "Empty Night," and "Hell's Bells"

and

Battlestar Galactica has "Frack"...

-------------

Somehow you made 2 copies of this thread, by the way... Ahdam commented in the other one...

[Niki Hawkes, I made it past GOTM... barely]

Ah dang. I deleted the other one as soon as it popped up. Sorry Ahdam!

[Siobhan]

Bloodydamn, the favourite curse of Red Rising.

And I sometimes think to myself 'Lord Ruler!'

[Ahdam]

Niki for Smeg's sake hahaha I was wondering where my comment went anyway I love Red Dwarf and smeg is the best word in the galaxy and now for a Red Dwarf Gif

image:

[Niki Hawkes, I made it past GOTM... barely]

Haha good one. :)

[Bill]

Well since I finished the Shadow Campaigns yesterday I’ll throw in “Balls of the Beast”

[Margret, Caladan Brood Face]

Empire of Storms has the best swears/ slang of all book time-

“You’re all leaky for that Molly aren’t you?” - you’re head over heels for that girl aren’t you
“It’s all balls and pricks anyways”- it’s all a load of crap
“My best wag” - my favorite friend/crew member
“I’ve bent a cock or two in my day”- ................well you know
“Piss’ell” - goddammit/ bloody hell/ well shit

[Diana Stormblessed]

I'm constantly telling my husband "storming lighteyes!" or "blood and bloody ashes!" I used to say "sparks!" a lot, but it's been a long time since I read the Reckoners and that one's fizzled out a bit.

[Silvana]

I use Seven Hells from ASOIAF, Frak from BSG and Kriff from SW.

[Rob]

Diana Stormblessed wrote: "I'm constantly telling my husband "storming lighteyes!" or "blood and bloody ashes!" I used to say "sparks!" a lot, but it's been a long time since I read the Reckoners and that one's fizzled out a..."

Ah, I forgot all my WOT swears. Don't forget "woolhead". Well not so much a swear as an endearment.

I was doing "air sick lowlanders" for a bit as well.

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

I just started The Warrior's Apprentice and apparently Miles thinks his mother considers "Barrayarans" a swear word :P... it's the planet they live on (and not his mother's home planet)

[Charlie]

@Siobhan I also use bloodydamn! I like Merlin's pants too, as inspired by Hermione.

[idiffer]

Finishing up Pathfinder (orson scott card), which is technically sci-fi, but most of the setting is pretty fantasy. So there's this piece of language:

"By Silbom's left testicle!"

[Diana Stormblessed]

Rob wrote: "Diana Stormblessed wrote: "I'm constantly telling my husband "storming lighteyes!" or "blood and bloody ashes!" I used to say "sparks!" a lot, but it's been a long time since I read the Reckoners a..."

I just got my husband into Stormlight a couple months ago, and now he constantly walks around me muttering "airsick lowlander" at me. To which I respond with "Storming lighteyes" (he's very pale green eyed and I'm very dark brown). It's the new way we say "I love you" lol.

[Rob]

awww. sign of true love.l! I've been trying to get my wife to read Sanderson for years now. one day she will cave!

[J.J.]

I read The Blade Itself and right now reading the 2nd book Before They are Hanged by Joe Ambercrombie.
There is this one feral girl named Farrow(not sure if it's spelled that way) and she's always angry and funny, probably my favorite character in the books. When she gets pissed with the people in her group, she's always saying "What do you care you fkn Pink!". She's colored blind and I'm guessing every white guy in there looks Pink to her. It's so funny, great book.

Bloodydamn is a good one. After reading Red Rising Trilogy I found myself saying that at times.

Brandon Sanderson books have some great ones that you all have mention already.

The WOT "Blood and Ashes!"

[jess]

Diana Stormblessed wrote: "Rob wrote: "Diana Stormblessed wrote: "I'm constantly telling my husband "storming lighteyes!" or "blood and bloody ashes!" I used to say "sparks!" a lot, but it's been a long time since I read the..."

You/your husband are my new couple to aspire to!
Course my hubby doesnt read. Boooo...

[Diana Stormblessed]

Jess wrote: "Diana Stormblessed wrote: "Rob wrote: "Diana Stormblessed wrote: "I'm constantly telling my husband "storming lighteyes!" or "blood and bloody ashes!" I used to say "sparks!" a lot, but it's been a..."

Neither does mine! But he has a hour+ commute each way and although he usually listens to podcasts, my obsession with Brandon Sanderson left him curious and willing to listen to an audiobook. He has now listened to all Mistborn Era 1 and 2 books and Stormlight 1 and 2. He's now on Edgedancer and Warbreaker is ready for him next :-)

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

This thread has me paying attention more to the made up swears in my books lately...

Warbreaker: COLORS!!!

Kushiel's Dart: Elloa's Balls!!!

Exile: Magga Cammeras!!!

October Daye: Oak & Ash!!! (Among others, I'm sure, that I can't remember)

I can't think of the others... I read too fast...

[jess]

Iain wrote: "This thread has me paying attention more to the made up swears in my books lately...

Warbreaker: COLORS!!!

Kushiel's Dart: Elloa's Balls!!!

Exile: Magga Cammeras!!!

October Daye: Oak & Ash!!! (..."

Iain, you just said the worst swear! “I read too fast”...Never!

[Shaitarn]

I've read Poison Elves so much I sometimes still mutter "Crow!" in annoyance.

And I love "Hoolies!" from the Tiger & Del books.

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

Jess wrote: "Iain wrote: "This thread has me paying attention more to the made up swears in my books lately...

Warbreaker: COLORS!!!

Kushiel's Dart: Elloa's Balls!!!

Exile: Magga Cammeras!!!

October Daye: O..."

Have you seen my scorecard?... I read a book a day... sometimes 2 if they're short... sometimes 1/2 if they're long...

[Rob]

And for all of us currently reading the Unhewn Throne series, it is "Kent Kissing" fantastic.

[jess]

I dont know if anyone’s said this or not but Fiddler in Deadhouse Gates (Malazan) says, “Foul snot of rabid dogs! Anal crust of dysenteried goats!” in the manner of a Gral tribesman.

Lol!

[idiffer]

Zero Sight's MC is originally not part of the magic world, he's a regular 21st century guy, but for some reason he always says:

"Stars above, [whatever else he wanted to say]"

It's like "Jesus Christ", only I don't get where this came from. The mages and vamps don't use this (I think)

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

Here's one from The Last Mortal Bond: by Ananshael's blackened a$$hole

I think this one strays close to the real world...

Kinda like Kushiel's Legacy with it's focus on sex, and how they use Elua's Balls and Naamah's Tits as swears...

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

Margret wrote: "Empire of Storms has the best swears/ slang of all book time-

“You’re all leaky for that Molly aren’t you?” - you’re head over heels for that girl aren’t you
“It’s all balls and pricks anyways”- ..."

You're interpretation of that phrase seems mighty PG...

[jess]

The King Beyond the Gate used “son of a slut”.
Strange.

[Margret, Caladan Brood Face]

Iain wrote: "Margret wrote: "Empire of Storms has the best swears/ slang of all book time-

“You’re all leaky for that Molly aren’t you?” - you’re head over heels for that girl aren’t you
“It’s all balls and p..."

I figured I'd tone it down to just regular balls and pricks, as the real interpretation for that phrase might get me reported hahaha

[Margret, Caladan Brood Face]

Jess wrote: "I dont know if anyone’s said this or not but Fiddler in Deadhouse Gates (Malazan) says, “Foul snot of rabid dogs! Anal crust of dysenteried goats!” in the manner of a Gral tribesman.

Lol!"

I noticed that too! little did i know I'd be thinking about a goat's asshole

[Timelord Iain, Tech Support]

Not quite on topic, but I've always found slattern to be a weird word... it's just an old-timey word for slut...

[idiffer]

@Jess
In russian there is such an expression. Don't know about english.